Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine. He had opened it up and was watching all the bubbles. A little while later a Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had. The little boy replied, "This is the most powerful liquid in the world, it's called turpentine." The Priest said, "No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you take some of this Holy Water and rub it on a pregnant women's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby boy." The little boy replied, "That ain't nothin.' You take some of this here turpentine and rub it on a cat's ass and he'll pass a motorcycle."
