| *Remember, this is only BSB humor and for your own entertainment. Don't hate me! ....Ways to piss off a Backstreet Boy 10. Tell Kevin your favorite Backstreet Boy is Brian but say that they're nothing alike. 9. Tell Nick you hate "Pokemon" 8. Ask Brian if Kevin is his cousin 7. Organize a group of teenyboppers and have them run after Aj just when he starts ordering at McDonald's after he has waited in line forever. 6. Beat Nick in everything - basketball and nintendo. 5. Tell Brian you're allergic to Mexican food and that Taco Bell dog of his is not helping. 4. Ask Nick did you really "resign" to Fl? lol 3. Ask Nick if he's that nice young man you just met named Justin and tell him what a cute lil boy he is.. 2. Ask AJ how was doing in rehab...Tip: Bring a bottle of champagne with you. 1. Tell Howie about the winking....that habit has got to stop ...Next Best Things To Being A Backstreet Girlfriend 10. Their Stylist - you know you'll see the Boys A LOT if you're their stylist... 9. Fatima - afterall, the Boys do "get paid to love her" 8. Guido - you never know what the duck (pardon me, GOOSE) has seen! 7. Lil Tyk - as if being in Brian's lap ALL THE TIME isn't enough, he probably gets star treatment too!! 6. A dancer - They get friggin sat on!! (ya know...in Larger Than Life....not to mention thrown around - hmmmm, better start taking dance lessons) 5. Being the dolphin that Nick has kissed (I'll try to find the pic to show you guys, but I think you know which pic I'm talking about) . Nick's chapstick - mmmmmm....lips 3. The ladder...'nuff said 2. Tattoo Artist - Imagine what Kev's tattoo artist saw... 1. And finally....you're all wondering what could possibly top the ladder and the tattoo artist huh? That would be *drumroll* Nick's TIGHTIE-WHITIES!!! *yeah...I'm sick - sorry. ...Ways to tell between a look-alike and the real thing 10. KEVIN: See if he's filming something with that camcorder he can't leave home without. 9. BRIAN: Swear. And if he has your head for it - you've got the right guy. 8. NICK: See if he says "WAZZZZUUUPPP!" when you talk to him. 7. AJ: The tattoos, obviously! 6. HOWIE: If he's smiling and winking at you...we know he's DEFINITELY the real thing 5. AJ: Wait and see if he hits on you. 4. HOWIE: Ask him whether he wears boxers or briefs. When he takes them out to show you...you'll know. Cause Howie only wears BACKSTREET boxers. 3. KEVIN: Ask him to talk - if he puts you to sleep before he even gets past "Hi", there ya go. 2. BRIAN: Have doggie treats with ya. And wait for Tyk to show his nose. 1. NICK: Look for the big Booty. lol ...Reasons Why Kevin Should Not Be President 10. He's got a potty-mouth. 9. He'll insult foreign leaders when he speaks to them ever so clearly. 8. People will zone out when he talks. 7. His English isn't too great. [cough]*celloist* 6. He'll put the country on edge all the time since he's constantly breaking a bone here, or tearing a muscle there... 5. He'll be wearing skirts instead of a normal suit like everyone else...SCANDAL! 4. He either doesn't brush his hair, or never cuts it...people will think the U.S. is in poverty or something... 3. He can't seem to get his holidays right - Since when was Memorial Day in November? 2. National presidential addresses will be twice as long since he needs to repeat everything...just in case you didn't get it the first time around. 1. He'll reveal all of Nick's dirty secrets to the whole country.... oh wait, I forgot he already has. ...New Year's Resolutions for the Boys 10. AJ and Nick: Start a Foundation - we're the only Backstreet Boys left without charities. 9. Kevin and Howie: Get cute little dogs like the rest of the guys - hey, it's a surefire way to get fans. 8. Aj: Chill out with the tattoos. 6. Kevin: Get a hair cut - the shaggy do so isn't doin it anymore. 5. Howie: Get a hair cut - being confused with a girl is bad. 4. Brian: Get a hair cut - just to see how I would look with a do OTHER than the one I've had since high school. 3. Aj: Quit rubbin off on Nick - next thing ya know, the blond one will become a tattooed, blue-haired freak. 2. Nick: Get a girlfriend without starting a scandal. 1. Nick: That girlfriend should be Angie- afterall, she's ready and waiting. Next Page Back |