Well, here's my latest fic! I know it's not 
much, and that it doesn't make up for not 
updating EW, but it's something to read, ne? 
It's very short and to the point, but I think 
you might enjoy it anyway :-) Read away!

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon & and the characters 
belong to Naoko Takeuchi, Kodansha, Toei, 
etc., etc. The song used in here is called 
"Superman" by Five for Fighting, and it 
belongs to them, not me!


"If Only" by Tess 
Posted 9-28-01

A cool breeze blew around Mamoru on his balcony. 
He wrapped his arms around himself and stared at 
the sky.

********************
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
I'm just out to find
The better part of me
*********************

Mamoru sighed. <Who am I, really?,> 
he thought. <I'm more than just Tuxedo 
Kamen...I know it...but who then?>

******************************************
I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It's not easy to be me
******************************************

You're Mamoru, his conscious told him. 
<But am I?> he wondered. <Chiba Mamoru. 
That's what they told me, but maybe they
were mistaken.>
*Flashback*
"You're name is Chiba Mamoru."
"Mamoru?"
"Mamoru, you were the only one who 
survived the accident We're so sorry 
about your parents."
"No! NOOOO!"
	A tear threatened to slide down 
Mamoru's cheek, but he blinked it back. 
How many nights had he tried not to cry 
thinking about parents he barely remembered? 
His only memories of them were simple things, 
like the rose smell of his mother's perfume,
or the deep tone in his father's voice. 
How Mamoru wished that things were different!

**************************
Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see
***************************

	He remembered a dream he had 
as a young boy in the orphanage, where 
his parents were still alive and they 
were all walking through an amuesment 
park, talking and laughing. Like a 
family. The dream had stayed with him 
the rest of his life, although the 
details had left his mind years ago, 
when the other dreams started. The dreams 
of a beautiful woman with a crescent moon 
on her forehead, asking him for the Silver 
Crystal. There was something about this 
woman, Mamoru didn't know what. He just 
knew that she gave him hope. It was that 
hope that kept him alive.
	That's why the rainbow crystals 
were so important to him. Somehow, he 
knew that they were linked to the Silver 
Crystal. But being enemies with Sailor 
Moon...that part didn't feel right. But
 did she know how it felt, not knowing 
your identity for the majority of your life?
Did she ever wonder about the person behind 
the mask that he wore, and was he just a 
person who stepped in and out of her life 
when she was in trouble? For some reason, 
Mamoru wanted Sailor Moon to know about his 
suffering.
 
*****************************************
It may sound absurd, but don't be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed, but won't you conceed?
*****************************************

<As if she could fix it!,> Mamoru thought 
sadly. <As if she could cure my lonliness!> 
He sadly stared into the dark blue sky. <If 
only she could cure my lonliness...if only.>

***********************************
Even heroes have the right to dream
It 's not easy to be me
***********************************

"If only," Mamoru whispered aloud before stepping 
back into his apartment.

END!
YaY! I finished another fic :0) I know it's 
a little sad and mysterious and 
foreshadow-y...it's supposed to be. 
Tell me your personal opinion, alrighty?
Thankyroo!
~*Tess*~