Haggis
God of Scottish Cuisine
(I wrote this when I was in the 9th grade. We were asked to make up a new
god/dess and describe their throne and emblem. The part of Haggis's legs was
taken from a story that a friend told me. He had convinced some tourists that
a haggis was an animal which had uneven legs to contiuously roam the hilltops.
My sense of humour, at least, has not changed much since then.)
Haggis was a cruel god who did many bad things
to sheeps' stomachs. So Angus, the god of all Scotland's
creations, put Haggis into the body of a furry creature
whose right legs were shorter than his left legs so he
could only climb around a hilltop.
There were no hilltops to climb on, so Angus
created one, but Haggis couldn't climb on it. Angus made
one hill after another until Haggis said that he would
only climb around the highest hill in Scotland. He was
not happy with the Grampian Mountains or Northwest
Highlands. So, Angus created the tallest hill right
between these two ranges - Ben Nevis.
Haggis was confined to walking around the top of
Ben Nevis, but continued to make trouble. Angus asked
Haggis if there was anything that would make Haggis stop
it. Haggis said that, though it didn't unnerve anyone
else, the sound of someone killing a cat would soothe his
soul.
So, Angus called upon MacKilcat, the god of Scottish
music. MacKilcat played an instrument which later was
known as the bagpipes.
Though most Scots won't admit it, they play the
bagpipes to keep Haggis away. They eat the dish called
Haggis - a sheep's stomach filled with lost of good stuff
including its lungs - to tell the god Haggis that he
can't enjoy their little treat.
Haggis - god of Scottish Cuisine
Haggis's symbol is a pan with a furry haggis in it. His
throne is a throne made up of a sheep's organs. It will
probably not last long because of his large apetite.
Angus - god of Scotland's Creations
Angus's symbol if a picture of knitting needles, yarn, and
a kilt forming from this. Knitting needles and kilts
originated in Scotland. His throne is not that different
from the symbol because not too many things were created in
Scotland apart from things used in the other gods' symbols.
The throne is made up completely with knitting needles
intertwined with yarn. Kilts are the back cushion, seat
cushion, and sides.
MacKilcat - god of Scotland's Music
MacKilcat's symbol is that of the bagpipes mainly because
the bagpipes represent Scotland's music. MacKilcat's throne
is a big, giant bagpipes. The sac of the bagpipes is the
seat. The pipes make the back of the throne. When he sits
down, it plays, "Ye Banks and Braes" by Robbie Burns or, "O
Flower of Scotland" - Scotland's un-official National Anthem.