Dan Bern's "Witness" Two Ways:

I don't know the names of some of the chords, so I'll just call them:

Am 002210

Am2 302010

Am3 200210

Am4 100210

Intro: Am Am2 Am3 Am4 (that's the whole song, but here's the first verse to help with timing)

Am Am2

Sometimes I don't believe you let me walk around

Am3 Am4

Above ground with the things I've seen

Am Am2 Am3

You talk about learning to love with your pants on

Am4

But every time you come around you dance on the

Am Am2 Am3

Table and let your feelings fall to the earth

Am4 Am Am2 Am3 Am4

That's what the sound was of somebody's birthday

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

And they signed me up for the witness protection program

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

And I became a blind guy in a titty bar

Am Am2

And it was so successful that they ran my ass for president

Am3 Am4

And got my ass elected and at my inagueration

Am Am2

I stood there naked with my hand on the bible

Am3 Am4

And I swore to uphold my duties and the constiutution

Am Am2

To the best of my ability as a blind guy in a titty bar

Am3

Tin cup and white cane

Am4

Strippers as my cabinet

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

And oh I am a witness

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

Oh I am a witness

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

Mmm I am a witness

Am Am2 Am3 Am4

Another way I play "Witness" is instead of using those Am variations, I use these bar chords, same timing as above. It doesn't sound very much like the way Dan plays it, but it's easier to play and sounds great when you're playing by yourself:

B 799877

A 577655

G# 466544

G 355433

So the song now goes:

B A G# Gs

And I heard that Kennedy got killed

'Cause he was about to come clean about the aliens

I heard that the Indians got killed

'Cause they were about to introduce drive-through fast food

I head that all the Jews got killed

So that the museums would all have something for the future

I head that the Hutus killed all the Tutsis

Cause otherwise they'd never see Jesus and his mother

Oh, I am a witness

Mmmmmm, I am a witness

They offered me a ticket to go to the moon

One way one pier don't come back soon

They offered me to pack up my belongings for free

Before too long they'd give them to me

Carry my god on the dark side of the moon

Teach me language and feed me with a spoon

They all came to say goodbye, one and through the other

My homicidal sister and my suicidal mother

Of the little pink children who

Tell you all about the weather

They take off and they free my balloon

With strings of leather

They blew me away like you blow away a feather

Oh, I am a witness

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, I am a witness

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh I am a witness

So here I sit on the balcony

Freeway far as the eye can see

I got my head packed underneath my hood

I got the darkest dark sun glasses that I could

I covered up my eyes and I patched up my ears

I got the ballgame on and I got a cold beer

I got photographs but don't worry

Isn't this a beautiful night

Just go about your business