MARCH 2003
March 2003
March 3, 2003:
Physically Jim's my type. In every other aspect he's totally not. *LOL* He's bisexual, more gay than straight, and he's a little more dangerous than I'm looking for, but he's physically attractive [way to repeat myself, right?]. I wore my long gray skirt today, and I look all cute and everything, and Jim saw me and said "Hi" first, so mission accomplished. *LOL* I'm freezing my legs off, but I do what I have to do. Anyway, history mid term on Thursday, and I'm getting a little nervous. I'm not sure what I'm going to write about for the one essay on the exam, but I have a few days to work on it, so I want to get some of the essay done each night until Thursday. Only one more class to go today, and it's sociology, and I swear I should just never go to that class because it's totally pointless and a waste of my precious youth. I'm pretty sure that class actually kills brain cells rather than building them. *LOL* I'm over my flu from a couple of weeks ago, and I'm so glad to be back in the black again. I feel a lot better than I did, so I'm happy. I got my coat back from the cleaner's, and there's no more cheese on it. Long story about dinner a couple of weeks ago. Basically, in a few quick words, Brian opened the door, but he opened it the wrong way and put down the stopper on the wrong side so that the door came back and hit me in the face, and I spilled my tray of noodles all over myself, my coat, and my scarf. We're still laughing about it. *LOL* I'm excited for mid term break when I get to finally go home for ten whole days with my family! I miss them so much! I have to call my mommy today, actually, because I missed her yesterday when she was out here in Kutztown. I've been reading Pet Sematary by Stephen King [along with everything else I've been reading for classes], and it's okay so far. Nothing scary yet, and it's not extremely exciting, but I like King's writing. Besides, Pet Sematary is a great flick, anyway, and I just want to compare the book to the movie. I've been really into that comparison lately with Abandon by Sean Desmond and Hannibal by Thomas Harris. I've concluded that the book will always be better than the movie. *LOL* But you could've told me that, right? Well, not a lot has been going on lately as far as life goes. I just recently met Jim through Chris [who I've decided to "marry"], so he's been hanging out with our little group of dinner companions, and I'm making new friends all the time. I also met Katie from Rothermel Hall near Main Street, and she's pretty cool. I found out that she's in my theatre class, and that might be good to know. I'm going to Manhattan on April 5 to see Kimberly Akimbo with my English comp. professor and a group of students. I think it'll be a lot of fun, and I'm looking forward to the trip. I haven't talked to Johnathan lately, but I guess neither of us has much free time nor is there a lot to really talk about until I see him in April. I need to worry more about this mid term, I think, until mid term break in a couple of weeks. I'm so excited, and I can't wait to go home!
March 4, 2003:
Pulled an all-nighter with Chris and Jim. *LOL* Chris fell asleep sometime around maybe 4am or a little bit before. But me and Jim are hardcore and stayed up all night! Rock on! *LOL* I have history, perspectives on American ed., and English lit. today, and I don't think it was wise for me to stay up all night because I don't know how I'll make it through today with Steph visiting between classes. I didn't finish my lit. homework, and I'm going to have to run to the library to print out my paper if I'm going to hand it in. I hope Steph doesn't mind hanging out with such a dork while she writes her paper for lit. before class on a Tues. *LOL* Anyway, staying up all night was so much fun! I had a good time just hanging out with some of the gang [Cristie] before she decided to go to bed. Chris fell asleep on a couch in the Thinking Cap, and Jim checked out dating web sites all night and chatted with random strangers while I dozed in and out, while never actually falling asleep. Every once in a while he'd point out a hot guy's picture, and I'd have to move my head to look. *LOL* But the night was the best way to bond ever. We just sat around and talked about such random things, and those types of nights are the ones I'm going to remember the best and the longest. I'm glad I didn't decide to go to bed, and it was nice to hang out with Jim for a while. I feel like I really got to know him better, and I would hope he feels the same way. Tonight I'm going to bed early. Like, right after dinner with the gang because Jim says I can't miss it. More on the fun night later.
March 10, 2003:
Okay, I don't know what's going on with Jim. We had a "fight," if you could even call it that, on Saturday night, and I feel like everything's been weird since. Hanging out in the Thinking Cap with Chris and Dante, Jim said something that, at the time, pissed me off to the point of deserving the silent treatment. Because I'm a preschooler, right? Very mature on my part. So I left the Thinking Cap and sat with Chris at the desk during his shift, and Jim walked by the desk at least three times while we sat there in three hours without saying a word. I had wanted to go to the Airport Diner, but he left, and I guess he got a clue when I didn't follow him this time that I was pissed at him. I always give in because I'm such a pushover and just that weak that I simply can't stand any conflict in the slightest with anyone ever, but this time I was REALLY mad, so I decided that I wouldn't let him get to me and get me to give in. He's got me wrapped around his little finger, and I know that, but he doesn't have to know that, too. So I stuck it out and went with Chris after his shift at the desk to play Dance Dance Revolution, my new favorite game ever, at 3am-LOL! Court, we have to go see a movie at the Carmike and play or something because it's damn awesome! Of course, we played until around 7am, and I am sore as ALL Hell yesterday and today moreso than yesterday [I don't know why the second day of something is always the worst], and I can barely walk because my calf muscles are so permanently contracted that I need to lean on the rail when I try to walk down steps of any kind-haha! But what fun it is. It's a good pain and a better workout than yoga any day of the week. Anyway, I've strayed far enough from the subject. Back to Jim and the "fight." Chris leaves the game, telling me he'll be right back, so I play a little more alone, and who comes down to the basement but Jim, wrapped in a blanket, and I'm thinking, "No, Chris did NOT just go up there to wake him up at 5am!" So Jim asks me what's wrong, and I say that nothing's wrong at first until he's not going away, and I feel like I have to at least talk to him. So I give up the big "fight" and tell him that I don't even remember what he had said any more but that I only knew he truly hurt me and that I was REALLY angry at the time. He apologized, and he went back to bed. Chris came back [conveniently after Jim left, which I appreciate], and we played DDR some more, and Jim came back just to watch, I guess. I don't know if he couldn't sleep or just felt that bad or what. I like to think I kept him awake. Lunch time. More later. You didn't think I was finished, did you?
March 11, 2003
So I guess I was finished for that entry-LOL! Anyway, I don't remember exactly where my train of thought last hit a station, so I'm just going to talk about tonight, I think. Tonight I learned that just because I get out of the library early [before 11pm] that doesn't mean that I'm getting to bed any earlier nor am I going to have any less fun because I'll be awake until at least 4am-haha! This also means that I will not be able to wake up before 8am to take a shower before history and will be forced to go to class all disgusting because that's the essence of what college life is about: never sleeping and always being online [whether you're online or not], staying up WAY too late every single night to go to the Airport Diner and play DDR for hours, and going to class both dirty and in your pajamas-haha! Welcome to college, and I can't wait for mid term break! Sometimes everyone just needs a break: from life, from work, from friends who live with you. Just to insure yourself against people getting so sick of you that they can't stand you, hate you, and stop talking to you forever. This is the time for a break. I'll be home Friday, so plan something fun for us to do, okay? I might go clubbin' with Chris on Thursday, but I'm not sure yet because he's going to Stonewall. It's a gay club, but that's not the part that bothers me because other friends of his are going who are also straight, and I have an open mind [which I value highly]. The part that bothers me is that I don't want to feel like I'm just taggin' along to have someone to hang out with and something to do because I don't know Chris's other friends, and they didn't invite me. Chris invited me. So even though I know he wants me to go [and I know it'd probably be a blast and a half before mid term break], I'll probably end up staying home and maybe hanging out with Jim if he's not sick of hanging out with me by then [which he probably is already along with everyone else]-LOL! I'll just have to let you know what happens when it happens. But right now I have to get my arse to bed because it's almost 4am, and I have history at 0930. I also have a big paper due today in lit., so I'm going to have to finish it between classes. Work out the ass to do this week. It's craziness all over again, and here comes Hell Week [almost]!
March 18, 2003
Well, I'm thoroughly enjoying the break. I'm sleeping late, watching too much TV, and renting movies with Sam. I haven't gotten the chance to see Courtney yet, but she's also still in school, and I know that she's mad busy and has important things to do. We'll get the chance to see each other before I go back to Kutztown until April and Spring Break. James might be coming up from Phila. to hang out with me this weekend, so we'll probably catch a couple of movies or something, maybe go out to eat somewhere. We've been wanting to go to this little coffee place called Northern Lights in Allentown since forever ago when he visited me and the grandparents in Slatington a while ago. Maybe we'll actually get the chance this time. I hope so. But before this weekend I'm going to see Steph in West Chester, so I'm excited about hanging out at a different campus for a day and seeing how other college students who don't go to KU are living-haha! I'm staying with Dad until Wed., so I'm taking the time to see the entire family in the short 10 days I'm going to be home when all is said and done. I miss everyone from KU, though, and especially Chris My Love-hehe! I miss Jim a whole lot, too, and I miss my roommates, of course. I wanted to be back at school in the damn car the first day of break! Mom's smoking again. She hasn't smoked that I know since before her and Dad got pregnant with me, so I was shocked and disappointed, and I hate smoking. She told me that she started again when her father died and said something about quitting when her mother dies, so I'm going to hold her to it. She gave me this chuckle like I wasn't serious, but I so am! It's no joke, Mom! I was sad and upset when Chris had started smoking at the beginning of this semester, but he quit, and I'm so glad because he made me very disappointed with that nasty habit. It's a little different with Mom because she's older and my mother, so I don't think it's going to be easy to get her to quit. I'll get her the patch or whatever it takes, but she will quit. I have a little work to do over the break, but it's not much and won't break my back or anything, so it's okay, and I'll get everything done before I go back. I want the rest of this semester to be a breeze [except for finals week, of course, because that can never be a breeze]. Well, maybe this finals week will be easy. I think I only have 2 exams. Chris and I aren't going to Golden Gala any more because Chris has a production on April 11th and there's a schedule conflict. But he asked me to his fraternity formal on May 3rd, and I'm so excited to go! I still have to try on my prom dress to make sure it still fits. I'm sure it does, and if it doesn't it'll probably be too big for me. I'm more excited for Chris's formal than I've ever been for any formal or prom because Chris actually asked me to go with him. For the 9th grade Farewell I didn't have a date, for the Junior Prom it was a given that I go with my boyfriend at the time, and for the Senior Prom I just asked a friend to go with me because I was again single at the time. This is so much better than that! May 3rd can't get here fast enough as far as I'm concerned! You know something? I'm so excited that I'm going to go upstairs and try on my dress right now! I'll let you know how the fitting goes! Good night!
March 25, 2003:
The bad news is my green dress isn't goin' to fit without me wearing a damn corset or something, but the good news is my pink dress is my Plan B. Plus, since Chris's formal is on a Saturday, we're planning on spending the whole day primping and getting ready to be the cutest couple there. *LOL* I still have to go into town with him to get a vest, and he already has his list of rituals written down to go through before the formal that night. I swear, Chris is so going to be cuter than me! *LOL* Mid term break was okay. Not awesome or wonderful only because I slept a lot, watched too much TV and saw too many movies, and didn't do a damn thing academically. I had planned on getting the work done early, but I guess that didn't happen. I did get to hang out with James, though, and we saw four movies in the two days he spent in town: Chicago and How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days on Friday and Bringing Down The House and Old School on Saturday. Old School is the funniest movie, and I didn't expect it to be as good as it was, and Chicago was the best movie we saw all weekend. I'm so getting the soundtrack, like, right this second! *LOL* I missed My Love SO MUCH! I couldn't wait to be back at KU just to see him again! He came out to his dad on St. Patrick's Day, and even though his dad already knew, I'm so proud of him! It takes a shitload of courage to be straightforward and honest like that. He even missed me so much that he wrote me a note middle school style, all folded into a tiny square and everything! *LOL* How incredibly CUTE is that? He's so sweet, and I know I've said it many times before, but if Chris were straight, I'd marry him right this instant! I want to see him in the production of Snow White this weekend, but Brandy's getting married on Saturday, and I'm leaving on Thursday and not coming back until Sunday, so I'm going to miss every show, but he dropped me a note and took me to rehearsal tonight because I'd get to see a full run-through of the entire show, and I'm glad I went, even though some of the people in the cast are jackasses. Rehearsal started about two hours late, and I was mad bored, but getting to see the show was worth the boredom and awkwardness of not knowing anyone except Chris. We didn't get out until almost midnight and went to the Airport Diner to eat, and we just got home, so I'm tired, but I'm not tired, and I was in the mood to write, so here you find me at 3:01am on a Tuesday. I guess my entire point is that I'm spending as much time with my friends from KU as I possibly can, and I went to Chris's rehearsal and APD with people I don't know to be with him because when summer comes too soon, I'm going to miss Chris more than anyone else here. He got the Community Assistant job he applied for...IN LEHIGH HALL! So I'm going to be seeing him all the time next year, and at least I won't be alone in Lehigh with only my roommate, Abby, to hang out with. I'm excited for summer, but I'm going to be upset and sad at the same time because I probably won't see anyone again until August...unless I take a road trip or two...hmm...*scratches head*...not a bad idea. *LOL* I'll have to or I'll go crazy at home for so damn long! *LOL* But I digress. I should get a little sleep before my 9:30am...
...And it's later. Yeah, I just felt like writing again. Don't know why because nothing exciting happened today except my own lack of coordination when I fell walking home from my 9:30am. *LOL* I tore up yet another pair of jeans and got a nasty scrape, but I'll live to fight another day. That's the third time this semester that I fell and tore up my jeans. I'll be mad if I fall any more because three is just enough. Anyway, I saw my dear husband for a few minutes today, but he's been on tour with the Snow White show, going around to schools today and rehearsal tonight. Snow White owns Chris this week, but it'll be over, and he'll be allowed to sleep again soon. *LOL* I have some work to do, so I'll catch you up on any breaking news later. You should probably be working instead of reading about me, anyway, so GET TO WORK!
March 31, 2003:
Brandy's wedding was on Saturday, and it was beautiful. She had it at Greenbrier Country Club instead of in a church, and I was glad because I'm not one for going to church, and I believe a wedding should be a happy, fun, celebrated occasion and not something a solemn and holy as going to church. She looked beautiful, and the tuxes Chad picked out were awesome. They looked gorgeous. I manned the all important guestbook and handed out programs, and the reception had great food. The music wasn't the best, and there was no dancing, but overall the wedding was nice. I'm so glad I got to go to Virginia instead of staying at school, even though I missed out on a lot of fun and Chris's Snow White shows this weekend and got really homesick for my friends. Summer's going to be so hard unless I can figure out a way to see everyone between May and August. I know I haven't been keeping up Thinking Aloud lately. I've been so busy with school, friends, going home to keep Dad happy, and sitting in a car to or from VA that I haven't had much free time on my hands. But I'm hoping things will start to slow down and give me time for what's important. I have a lot to do yet this semester. Advisement is coming up and starts before Spring Break, so I have to sign up with my new advisor in the English department for scheduling next semester's courses. I know the basics of what I should be taking and just need my schedule okayed. I have yet to go out to Stonewall with Chris and his friends because their plans got cancelled last time they wanted to go out. Unfortunately. Everyone missed me here at KU over the weekend, and I felt loved coming back earlier [when it was still Sunday]. I should probably get to bed relatively early tonight, but I was in bed early all weekend and got my sleep. Plus, Jim went out, and I'm just wondering if he's going to be back tonight. Of course, he might just go to bed and could be home already, and I wouldn't know. *LOL* I talked to Court for, like, two seconds today because I decided to see Analyze That at the SUB with Jim and Jen earlier. I saw it before, but it was a funny movie, so I figured why not see it again? I had the time and the will to not do any work. *LOL* Chris is working the desk until 2am, so I might take a walk and visit him to say good night and give him a hug because I can't go to sleep without saying good night to my dear husband, you know? *LOL* Johnathan's coming home in...SOON! I'm not sure how many days are left, but I'll make sure to ask him and let you know ASAP, okay? All I know is that I freakin' miss my best friend after not seeing him since last January! WTF? I'm so excited for Spring Break, and I can't wait to see him again. I'm hoping I have a car by then, but I'm starting to seriously doubt that possibility because Spring Break is in, like, two weeks, and Dad's still thinking about working on my car. It freakin' snowed today! WTF? After all of the nice weather it snows out of nowhere. What's up with that shit? I don't understand it. I really don't. I can't wait to develop my pictures from the wedding. I'm excited to see how they turned out, and I'll be able to show everyone who got married and how much C.J. and I could seriously be twins. It's freaky. Well, it's getting later as time passes, and Jim's not back yet, and I'm not going to wait much longer, so I think I'm going to make my last visit to Chris for tonight and head off to bed. Some of us have classes tomorrow! Good night!...
...Later. I'm having a great day today! I only have one class until I'm finished for the day, the sun is shining despite the cold, I took care of my housing for next semester [and I'm staying put and rooming with Abby again in a double converted from our triple now, so we'll have a lot of space], and I still have lunch to look forward to with the gang! I'm so happy!
