"I DIDN'T KNOW

I DIDN'T KNOW

Somewhere, during the night,
into the early morn,
I was born.
Didn't know, the reasons why,
Didn't know, the extent.
Didn't know, what it really meant.

Didn't know, if I was real,
certainly, didn't know, how I could heal.
Didn't know, I was so broken,
I didn't know, I was so full of emotions.
Didn't know, where the tears came from,
Or, what the pain I was feeling, was from.

Didn't know, bad from good.
I didn't know, the what ifs, what was.
Didn't know, if I had a name,
I didn't know, if I was just a pretend,
Kind of game.

I didn't know, sadness from joy.
Didn't even know, if I was a girl or a boy.
Didn't know, about such things as time,
Didn't know, what it meant, to be kind.

I didn't know, what my role was to be.
Didn't know, where I stood,
in this place, where I really was.
I didn't know, there were so many others,
or, what they were to me.
Didn't know, how to be a friend.

I didn't know, how to live.
I am told, years have gone by,
and I still don't know, the why's.

I still don't know, who I really am,
or what I stand for.
I do know, I am a girl.
I do know, I have a name.
I found it out, when she called me out,
and told me, to come in.
I then found, I was a she,
and there was a reason for me.

They say, I need to believe.
Not sure, what that really means.
Time will tell, is what they say.
I guess, that is the only way.
They say, go day by day.
I say, "Is there any other way?"

For now, I watch and wait,
For something to come my way.
For this to make sense to me.
For my part to take place.
For the pain, to be erased.
For good, to enter in,
to help me understand,
Who, I really am.
� � � � � �

Written by: Lightning age 8.

page by: Nancy

Oct. 16, 2000

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