Johannes Johnson 1805-1902

The Johansons moved to New York from the lowlands of Holland in the early 19th century to join the throngs of wizardly families moving to America. (You kinda figure it's a bit easier for witches and wizards to migrate than other folk, and you may as well go where you hear things are generally prosperous.) Both parents were very talented wizards and they had high expectations for little Johannes. Little Johannes, on the other hand, did pretty good at school, but didn't find a deep attraction to any particular area of wizardry. After working for a few years in some minor govenmental posts, Johannes declared his intentions to go into "Muggle Studies," much to his parents chagrin. (Rather akin to giving up your internship to go back get a masters in an LAS).

Mostly it was a delaying tactic, kinda like going into the Peace Corps for 2 years so you can decide what to do with the rest of your life. Johannes set up a year-long program in which he'd immerse himself into muggle culture and not use his powers to, theoretically, gain a true understanding of the Muggle condition. His family were not pleased, but it was a valid academic thing to do, so they basically said "fine, but you're living near home so we can keep an eye on you, boy." So Johannes moved out to Chicago and got a job as in a railroad yard.

Naturally, of course, working in a railroad yard ain't fun and living as a Muggle ain't fun and it was kinda dirty, but very fascinating. Johannes got to be good friends with Carver McNally, another worker who was in a relationship at that point. So he spent a year getting to know Muggles and getting biceps the size of his head (and muscle-aches the size of New Jersey) from hauling around iron instead of levitating it and learning how to do travel everywhere by foot and save up money for the laundry and that sort of thing. After a year, Johannes told his dear friends that he was offerred a better job (it pays and your hands don't get as tough as your feet!), wrote his dissertation and went back to the Wizard Council, only in a different department now and on a much more local level "in the western wilds." (Read: Kansas.) Because he really did get to be friends with Carver, he still writes him saying "Hey, like the new job. You can mail me here. How are you?"

Johann works in the department a couple of months and gets pretty friendly with the communities. He hears a lot of moaning about how fragging awkward it is getting to get their kids to school in Massachusetts because it's really far, Muggles are stringing lights up all over the place, and all that. Getting to school unseen is always a real chore. Johannes nods sympathetically and solicits advice and then something in his brain goes "click" and he goes "Heck, it worked for the Muggles: we could use trains! Hide in plain sight!"

It's about this time that Johannes runs into Long Shiao Wun, a Chinese wizard whom Johann first met on the railroad job. Long is a dragon specialist known for really clever ideas, a really smart mouth, a short temper, and chronic untruths. (Some combination of these qualities has resulted in the young wizard living outside China and keeping a low profile. Long's favorite cockamamie lizard story is that he's a dragon-friend who chased a rogue dragon across the Pacific for killing someone (bad dragon, Dragon Emperor is probably after him too), has finally caught it, and has tried harnessing it to an engine to get himself back to the West Coast, but hasn't got it quite right. Of course this is patently false, but Johann has yet to hear anything more plausible.) It is Long's idea to improve Johann's Muggle steam engines by hiring dragons to power them. It's crazy. It's dangerous. It saves millions of gold pieces on coal. It's... ruddy brilliant.

Fast forward lots of haggling with wizard government and businesses and all for permission and funding and all that and project is finally approved. Hoorah. Johannes is all happy and very very stressed (and his parents are finally going "That's our boy. He's... um... inventive, but he thinks big!") when Johannes gets this letter from Carver saying "Things not so good. Just fired: new wave of unwashed masses who'll work for even less than me, jobs around here are scarce and bad. Anything looking promising by you?"

Johannes thinksthinksthinks and goes "Eureka": Actually, yes, we have job position. I'm in the middle of a project for a... privately funded train company and we need an intermediary between the private train plant and the suppliers. We need someone who will order our equipment from Mug... from steel mills and iron works and deliver it to our railroad yards.

Arrangement is reached where Carver haggles with suppliers and ferries parts around and makes land deals and stuff. And when Carver shows up at plant someone goes "The kids coming!" or whatever and everyone pretends they're actually working the old-fashioned way. Of course, as Carver isn't entirely stoooopid, he eventually figures out that something weird is going down and catches Johannes in the act of some minor magic or another. ("Ahhh!" "No, wait! Um. Not a big deal. What'd you just see?" "You had a cut from here to here and now there's nothing!" "Oh, yes. That. Well. Um. Would you like a brandy? No, really, Carver, you *really* look like you could use a brandy." "Why aren't you bleeding?!" "Yes, that. Um. brandy first, then I'll explain. Hell knows I need one too.")

Anyway, Johannes smooths things out with Carver, Carver is kinda weirded out, but gets used to it. ("You sure you can't teach me... you know..." wiggles fingers. "Uh. No. Sorry. Kinda comes with the package.") Train and rails are all ready, big ol celebration is thrown where Johannes and Long and Carver get to wear really fancy dress robes and hobnob with important wizards on the first ride. ("Me? Why me? I'm Muggle!" "Just act like a wizard." "How? Do I turn people into frogs or something?" "Carver, have I *ever* turned you into a frog?" "... Not that I recall. No." "Riiiiight. Trust me, no one will notice.") Johannes, being Johannes, decides to ditch the bigwigs after a few minutes and comes out with a serving cart to go offer the passengers refreshments and chat with the other folk as the dapper guy who serves the pastries instead of the bigwig who organized the train project.

Project is a success. Dragons cooperate. No one dies on the maiden voyage. Carver gets his picture taken with the most important wizards in America. Johannes gets his picture taken in his serving outfit and hangs it in a prominent place on his wall. Carver is still Johannes' business partner, but now that most of the train stuff is done, kinda goes "Um, not that it hasn't been a grand... if weird... time, but now what?" And Johhanes kinda gives him the hopeful look and goes "You could staaaaaay here. Move in with me?" "Er. We already live in the same house. I'm guessing you mean move in- move in?" "Yes." "That's kinda sudden." "It wasn't supposed to be." "You never *said* anything." "I was being subtle. So will you move in?" "Can I think about it?" "Sure. Now will you move in?")

Eventually, after a carefully crafted wooing (snort), Johannes and Carver move in together and live happily ever after with the occassional fight over who stole who's socks and all that. Awww.