Reighn cursed colourfully in Gaelic and threw a wrench across the garage as she stared hard at Impala before her. Her eyes narrowed as she fumed silently, unaware of the world around her. She hadn't been aware of anything since yesterday, not really. She'd been so completely in shock over the fact that Relec, her big brother, her protector, her hero, wasn't there anymore. She'd crawled out of bed that morning as if the world was going to end if she did so and came here. The garage was silent, seeing as it wasn't even three am yet. Reighn rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand before plunking down in a chair. She hated this. She hated it when things like this happened. It had happened when Corrin had died, and had nearly happened when Allana had gone over that cliff. Reighn hated her past more than anything in the world, and she had a secret that not even Relec had known about.

Manic Depression.

Not pretty words. It really only showed when she was under a lot of stress or was pissed over something - and it took a lot to make Reighn Landcaster mad. Her doctor had kept it discrete because she had requested it so, and she filled the prescription for Wellbutrin every three months, and had taken to putting it in an ibuprofen bottle - none of the team used it other than her, so they never questioned her when she kept two bottles of it in the bathroom cupboard.

What annoyed her most was that she was getting married to Leon in less than three months and she hadn't told him yet. He needed to know, she just didn't know how to tell him. She didn't know how to tell him that when her best friend had committed suicide that she'd tried to follow.

Reighn blinked for a moment and then her eyes narrowed as her mind replayed everything from yesterday over again. She had seen Puck and Devra take off, but where to? She should know the answer to that question. Wait. Hadn't Puck once said something in about a cabin in Snowflake? Why anyone would want a cabin out there she had no clue. Big Lake was not only in the middle of nowhere, but it was in the middle of the White Mountains. From tucson that was a four, maybe five hour drive going the speed limit, and from where she stood now to Tucson it was a nine hour drive. If she took I10 up to Phoenix instead and went up the highway and through the canyon that way she'd be able to cut an entire hour off the trip - maybe two if she cut through the city right. She frowned in thought, should she though? Allana and Kittie needed her now - but, they also had Vince and Jesse to help them, they hadn't before. She could swing by the house to shower and change, then leave Leon a note before taking off.

Reighn turned, heading for her car, she stepped into the Skyline and pulled out of the garage, taking off down the street in the direction of home.

~ * ~

She watched Leon sleep for a moment, once again debating how to tell him about her past. Her eyes flickered to her journal. Yes, she could leave that, everything was there, and with her gone it would give him time to think about it all make the decisions that needed to be made with what he would learn about her. She nodded to herself and wrote her note, leaving the journal and the note on her pillow where she was supposed to be.

Leon awoke that morning to the feeling of something not right. He rolled over and opened his eyes, expecting to see Reighn laying there. She wasn't. In her place was a hard bound journal and a note. He picked the slip of paper up and read it:

Leon,
I can't just sit here anymore. There's too much to deal with. I've gone after Puck and
Devra, please don't follow me, and please don't tell the girls where I've gone. There's
a lot about me that you don't know, and I know that you need to know all of what has
happened in my life before we get married. I don't know how to tell you, so I'm leaving
my journal. Hopefully it will tell what I can't. I love you.
- Reighn

Leon picked the small book up and wandered to the window seat in his room, sitting down with it and opening it to the first page.

~ * ~

June 18, 1991

I found out why I'm here. Why I'm in this prison they call an orphanage. Dad committed suicide. Why? I don't think I want to know the answer to that question. So, here I am, the only one here who actually knew their parents - or parent as the case may be. I'm eleven years old, I shouldn't have to worry about this stuff. I should only have to worry about what to wear to school tomorrow or what part to put where in the car that Relec and I are working on.

Did I tell you anything about Relec? Relec lives down the street from the foster home I'll be moving into tomorrow. He has two little sisters, Allana and Kittie. Allana is ten, a year younger than me, and Kittie is seven. Relec is older than me by nearly four years, and he knows so much about cars. I like him and his sisters, they seem really nice...

~ * ~

Hot desert wind blew around her as Reighn pulled hair off her neck. She hadn't rolled the window up, or turned the cooler on, even if she was boiling hot, the air flowing around her like it flowed around her car calmed her somehow. She'd been driving for nearly four hors now, which meant that she was still in California, not even close to getting into Arizona. She sighed and allowed her mind to wander.

Everyone would most likely be getting up right about now. Letty and Mia would be in the kitchen, Letty drinking a cup of coffee, seated at the table while Mia cooked breakfast. Allana would barely be waking up and Kittie would be rolling over and pulling her pillow over her head. Leon had probably found her note, and the letter. She wondered what he'd be doing right now. Would he be sitting in the window seat opening her journal, or would he be stumbling around, his confused brain fogged with sleep. She didn't know, and somehow, it didn't seem all that important.

~ * ~

August 23, 1991

Mark hit Jassi and me again today. I don't really remember why, but I remember what he did. I don't understand what we've done to deserve this. I try and stay away from the house as much as possible. I usually go to the garage to work on the beaten Skyline we found. I want to make her run again. To make her royal purple with wings. I want to make her fly...

~ * ~

Reighn sighed once again as she passed through the checkpoint on the state line and headed down the Arizona highway to Phoenix. She wasn't willing to stop any time soon. Maybe in the city for gas and food. Maybe in Yuma before that, she didn't know. All she knew right now was that she needed to get to Big Lake. She needed to confront Puck for what he'd done to them. She didn't quite know what she felt, and didn't know whether or not to call it revenge. Puck was going to pay though, and Devra would too if the other woman got in her way.

Only someone with first hand experience with a Manic Depressive could tell you that you never wanted to be in the way when one was on the warpath. And Reighn was on the warpath. She was seeing red, spitting fire and fuming. She had always had a naturally high temper, and the depression only magnified that, which meant that you really didn't want to be her target.

~ * ~

April 7, 1993

We got artistic today. The cutting has become more than an escape now. Jassi started to cut wings into my back, saying I was an angel. I don't believe her though. How can someone like me be and angel? I don't deserve to be called one, I hate life, and I hate the world. I hate everything. Angels don't hate. I think that maybe she was talking about someone else, because she couldn't have meant me.

The Skyline is beautiful now. We've gotten the body work finished, so now she actually looks like a car instead of a mass of scrap metal. Relec said that when we finished her he'd teach me to drive it so that when I get my license I can race. I love racing, it brings such a rush to you. I've got three years to wait though - until I'm sixteen.

Things are happening so fast. Relec turned seventeen recently, and Allana and I are going to the same school next year. They took Kittie to the doctor and we found out that she has ADHD - Attention Dis-something-or-other Hyperactive Disorder. I can't remember the second word. It's not like it really matters. Kittie ground her Ritalin to dust and put it in a bottle of red paint. How she got ahold of the paint I'll never know. And why she chose paint will remain a mystery...

~ * ~

The Salt River Canyon was always beautiful, no matter what time of year it was. The blue water below and the rock formations - which were dusted with snow during the winter - held an unearthly beauty that always made Reighn feel at peace somehow. The last time she'd driven through the canyon was nearly four years ago when the entire team had gone up to Puck's cabin in Snowflake to get away from the stress of everyday life. That was the reason why she knew that Puck would go there, she knew he loved the place, but she also knew he'd go there because he wouldn't remember that the team had been there before. He'd be too busy trying to figure out what to do next. He'd finish what he started though, she knew he would. He was making plans for her downfall - it was one of Puck's faults, he always had to have things planned out so carefully that he'd spend days, or even weeks figuring out how to do what he wanted to before he actually went and did it. And by that time, everyone else was usually finished doing it.

Reighn drove over the bridge and a sign passed - Globe 180 miles. A half hour more and she'd be able to stop for gas before making the last hour and a half of the drive to Snowflake.

~ * ~

July 17, 1993

Jassi couldn't do it anymore. She left us today. She went to heaven - I think anyway. She committed suicide, I don't know what do do now. We always had each other to hang onto when things got bad. I don't know what to do now that I'm all alone...

August 11, 1993

I tried to follow Jassi. I slit my own wrists. Allana found me before I could bleed to death though, I'm grateful for her. She, Kittie and Relec proved to me that I wasn't all alone after all, that I had them. Dr. Stretfield is actually a pretty nice guy, and he's willing to keep everything we talk about, and all that in his office and not tell the guys. I have Manic Depression, I don't want Rel, Kit-Kat and Allana to know, so when I got the first prescription filled I bought another bottle of painkillers and put the last few from the bottle I had at home in it, and put the meds in the empty bottle.

Social services have started poking around. It took Jassi's suicide and my attempted suicied to clue them in on the fact that there's something wrong with my fosters. I hope the Freeman's go to jail. They deserve it. If they do, I'll move in with Allana and Kittie and everyone, so I don't have to leave. Relec is almost eighteen, so he'll be able to become a foster or something to that effect. I just wan't all of this to be over with so I can actually live my life.

~ * ~

Reighn grabbed a bag of chips off the shelf and paid for them along with the gas she'd just put into her car. She left the chevron and got back into her car, starting it and pulling out onto the highway, turning onto the highway that would take her to Snowflake. She turned the radio up and it swirled around her like the wind did as her throughts flew around in her head she wasn't quite sure how long she'd be on the road for, but she was sure that if she kept going a hundred and ten she'd get there sooner.

~ * ~

November 16, 1998

I graduate from high school in a few months, I can't wait to get out of that hell hole. I'll be able to work in the garage full time then. Relec told me he was going to ask Corrin to marry him, I'm really happy for them, they're so in love - Exact opposites of Puck and Devra, sure they love each other, but they fight all the time. It gets rather annoying when you're trying to work. Puck wants to hit the Mexico circut, I think he loves the power that comes with being the best a little too much. We're already part of the Mexico scene though, we race in Nogales, have the city is in Mexico in more ways than one. He should say Phoenix and want to move to the Northern Arizona circut since that's where we've never actually been before, but I'm not complaining - who's gonna complain over white sands and blue oceans? Not me, that's for sure...

Leon turned the page to find it blank. Had she stopped writing after that? He didn't know, but he needed to talk to her when she got back. He was glad that Reighn had told him, or tried to tell him about her past. It was all so harsh, but she'd gotten through it. How could she be so loving and happy after that? Leon didn't know, but he wouldn't let her go, not ever.

~ * ~

Reighn pulled to a stop in front of the cabin and got out of the car. She walked up the steps to the door and knocked, waiting patiently for someone ot answer the door. It swung open and there stood Devra, wide eyed and shocked. "Reighn."

"Devra. Where's Puck?"