DISCLAIMER/WARNING: The gargoyles and Fox are not mine, because I am dirt poor and have nothing to do with Disney. Dammit. This MiSTing is not done for financial purposes, merely entertainment venues. So, don't sue. KingCobra is mine, though. Obviously, though, since I AM KingCobra. Any other characters who did not appear on the show belong to Pestilence. There is language, some violence, and endless counts of adult themes, so everyone who�s reading this but is under 18 should leave NOW. This is definitely NOT for children.
"Lex, what are you doing?"
The youth looked up from what he was doing, slightly annoyed at being interrupted. He had been trying to figure out how to reconfigure the Castle's locks so they could all get out of there, and he had been brainstorming when his rookery brother had found him.
"Nothing, Brooklyn. Just trying to think of an exit."
"Lots of luck. Demona said we're good and stuck."
Lex grimaced. He knew it was true, but some part of him did not want to admit that.
It was at that moment that Angela entered the room, looking a little impatient. "Hey, Mother says we're getting a newbie beamed up!" She put her hands on both their shoulders, herding the two males to the door in a show of feminine aggression. "Come meet him!"
"What's the big deal..." Brooklyn started to say, but the female cut his question off.
"Just come on!"
***
He blinked in surprise as his eyes took in the strange new surroundings. He was in some danky old Castle, standing in what looked like some great hall. Fancy-shmancy decorations outlined the room, and a large purple rug was on the floor for a good length of it. The place looked, felt, and even smelled like it was from some medieval world. It was nice, though, in a way. He could really get used to it here, though it had been weird. He had just been sitting at his computer, chatting with his online friends like the computer junkie he was, just minding his own business, when suddenly this yellowish beam had appeared out of nowhere, enveloping him in its' midst. Now, all of a sudden, he was here.
Then a bunch of Gargoyles, 5 males and 1 female, entered the room through the large double doors at the end, and the man jumped slightly. He hadn't been expecting that to happen.
One of the males, a tall, blood-fleshed male with cotton-colored hair, and a facial intrusion, one that made the startled human briefly recall a bird his aunt had once had before her fatal bout with cancer eight years prior, spoke with sarcasm dripping off his voice. "Talk about nerves of steel."
"What... what the hell am I doing here?"
"You've been chosen." The voice was unfamiliar. New, and while it was feminine, it was dripping with bitterness and a hard edge that didn't strike him as belonging to anyone who wouldn't think twice about killing someone. The honey-blonde haired man tried not to panic. Okay, just relax. Breathe. You're in a strange situation, but you're still in control. JUST CHILL!!
"Stop that pathetic whimpering, human." There was that strange voice again, and it seemed to be coming from the blue-skinned female walking towards him from the darkened corner on his left, a cruel, hateful scowl on her lovely face. Despite his slight fear, which was slowly ebbing away now that he was already getting used to this, he gathered his resolve and, very boldly, asked. "Who are you?"
"I am Demoma."
"So, why am I here? And what have I been chosen for?"
"An experiment." Now it was a redhead female, but human, and just as beautiful. "One orchestrated by my husband. He's testing us to see if we can endure bad fics. He's hoping that we can all learn to get along. Only then will he let us all go."
The red one snickered as he glared hatefully at the blue-skinned female with the red hair. "'Get along'. With you? Yeah, sure."
"More like we read bad fics, and make snide comments about them," Lex said in a half-jokingly, half-informative, tone. If the male was going to take part in these experiments, it wouldn't hurt to explain what they did here.
"If he's your husband, then why are you here?" Damn, she was married. The youth cursed his luck.
"I volunteered. Nothing better to do."
"Ah."
"So identify yourself." This came from the huge, purple male, who had the biggest muscles the human man had ever seen. Talk about beefy. Unfortunately, not that he was big on snap judgments, but he surmised rather quickly that it didn't like this behemoth�s brain didn't come anywhere near to the size of his biceps, and forced back his grin, along with a small chuckle.
"Well, my name is Ed, but most people know me as KingCobra. It's my online alias, whenever I'm on the Internet."
"I am Goliath, and the female there is Demona, my former mate. The others are Broadway, Brooklyn, Lexington, Hudson, and the young one is my, and Demona's, daughter, Angela."
"Ah, the slut? Looks more like Courtney Love and Hilary Clinton's love child with dark hair dye and wings to me."
Angela's eyes flared. KingCobra only snorted.
A male voice suddenly flooded over the intercom system. "Experiment time. The following fic was written by one of the many talented online authors out there, Pestilence. It's called 'Necromancer's Tale'. Rejoice, my good people!"
ALL EXCEPT KC: AAAAHHH!!! It's fanfic time!!!
(They all scatter, while Ed stands there, totally lost.)
ED What in the hell... (Lex grabs him by the arm and pulls him into the theatre through the double doors.) AH!
(THEATER SEQUENCE.)
KINGCOBRA: Wow, this sounds like it's gonna be fun.
BROOKLYN: Wait until it's actually over. I'm betting you'll change your mind real quick.
DISCLAIMER: 'Gargoyles' belong to Disney and Buena Vista, not me. Shania, Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood belong to me. If you want to use them, ask permission, please don't just take them. The idea of this story is mine, although the original characters aren�t, and, well, whatever.
ELISA (as author) They're mine! MINE, I TELL YOU, MINE!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
By the way, 'Shania' is named after Shania Twain, a woman who annoys the hell out of me.
(ALL START SINGING BAD SHANIA TWAIN SONGS.)
WARNING: This story contains excessive violence and swearing. There's a lot of blood, and other stuff like that. If you don't like sex either, then skip that part. There is sex in this fanfic, and it is not intended for young readers. If you�re under 18, get the hell out of here!!
(KINGCOBRA IS GLAD HIS SISTER�S KIDS AREN�T HERE.)
I don�t want to be sued!!!
(KINGCOBRA STARTS CALLING A FEW LAWYERS.)
This is an old fic of mine that I wrote a long time ago. I am very sorry it�s going to be the first one posted, but my other fics will be coming along soon. I hope. I�m almost done the first story in my other series, which as of yet has no name. Oh yeah, hi
BROOKLYN: Mary
Shelly! DUDE!!
LEX: Where's my car!?
Had to do that, so she knows who the hell I am. ^_^
ANGELA: (as Shelly.) Who the hell are you?
Questions, comments, flames, praise, send to [email protected].
LEX: I shall send her many Questions, comments, flames, and praise about the fact that this feels like it's gonna be a long-ass fic.
KINGCOBRA: Of Two Cities. Hey, I think I'm starting to get it already.
ALL: Too bad for you.
LEX: Sit back, human, Watch us, and Learn.
Manhattan, 2075 Winter Solstice
HUDSON: With a wee chance of snow showers.
Castle Wyvern
It was a clear, cool night. The night of the Winter Solstice, when every gargoyle around the world celebrated. It was because the night of the Winter Solstice was the longest night of the year, and all gargoyles celebrated it.
BROOKLYN: The biggest part of it was when they played 'Pin the tail on the Gargoyle'!
In the great hall of Castle Wyvern, which sat atop the Eerie Building, a party was going full swing. A whole clan of gargoyles were celebrating in the castle, and human clan members joined in on the festivities as well.
ANGELA: Until the Quarrymen showed up, that is.
The clan that lived in the castle was the Manhattan Clan. Most of the inhabitants were from Avalon, though a few were from the old clan, Clan Wyvern.
FOX: And the rest were just stoned partiers who got lost and confused.
The original gargoyles were, specifically, Lexington, Broadway, Goliath, and Bronx. Angela had been from the Avalon clan, though she arrived in Manhattan before any of her rookery brothers or sisters. Hudson had died nearly ten years before.
HUDSON: Me head exploded the second 'Survivor: Iraq' was first aired.
The last of the Wyvern clan was Brooklyn, known to most as Necromancer.
BROADWAY: Brooklyn was transformed into the Book Of
The Dead.
ELISA: That's 'Necronomican', not "Necromancer", and, anyway, how could a gargoyle become a book?
BROADWAY: Uh.... HEY! COOL! A PIZZA!!
The hatchlings playing about knew him only by that name, and not as the one he had originally chosen for himself the night his clan awoke from their thousand year sleep.
BROOKLYN: I had originally wanted to call myself "Lucas The Destroyer", but it felt too medieval.
LEX: HAH! Cool!
He watched with almost impassive eyes as the hatchlings raced about, giggling and laughing happily. His youngest son was among them. Sauron.
BROADWAY: Who would later go on to desire the powers of the dark Ring.
He watched him play around the adults with Sean, Lexington's second hatchling. He watched as his rookery brother Lexington talked with his mate, Ophelia.
LEX: (himself.) Guess what, honey? I'm gay!
ANGELA: (as Ophelia.) Well, I'm glad to hear that, honey, cause I've got news for you: I'm really a male!!!
He watched as Broadway came in, carrying a huge plate of food. He saw Broadway's little daughter run underneath his feet and nearly trip him up.
GOLIATH: Then Scooby Doo ran through, and REALLY tripped him up. The last thing Broadway said before falling face first into his food was "I would've gotten to my table in one piece if it wasn't those meddling kids and their dog"!
He watched.
BROOKLYN: as the girl in the window started changing her clothes.
A sudden presence at his side made him turn. Standing beside him was his mate, Shania, a raven haired female with skin the same blood red as his own. Her blue eyes were piercing, as she too turned to watch the clan celebrate.
FOX: (Shania.) They have no idea that we slipped cyanide in their punch a half hour ago.
BROOKLYN: (Himself.) Let�s just play it casual. Draw no attention.
Necromancer sighed. He knew he had a lot to be thankful for, but he just couldn't get into the fun of everything.
BROOKLYN: Until I got drunk and hammered.
Not until he told his tale.
BROOKLYN: I set sail for an open sea, where I befriended a talking whale. Shamu and I battled sharks and then swam away to Antarctica. The End.
He noticed that his first children were also holding back from the party a little. They were sort of into it, but didn't go very far into it. They smiled as they watched their children play with the other hatchlings, and laughed with the others their age, but didn't do much more than that.
They were waiting. They knew that they could never be truly at ease with the clan until their tale was told.
The tale of Necromancer and his family.
They glanced up and saw him looking at them. They knew. Knew that tonight the tale would be told to their clan. Then, perhaps the clan would understand why they were the way they were.
BROADWAY: Gee, maybe too little carbs, not enough zinc?
LEX: Only you, Broadway...
They nodded. So did he.
Tonight. Now long now.
LEX: Before the fic ends, hopefully.
Shania looked at him. " This night," she said softly, her voice soft but deadly, "This night is the night. They must know the truth."
Necromancer nodded. " Yes, my love," said he. " Our clan must know our truth."
BROOKLYN: (Jack Nicholson) They can't HANDLE the truth!
She nodded. Suddenly, a loud bell rang through the Great Hall. The two gargoyles looked up, and walked out of the shadows as Goliath called for everyone's attention.
" My friends," Goliath began, his voice loud and rolling. Everyone looked at him, and gathered around. Goliath smiled. " My friends, as we all know, tonight is the Winter Solstice. A time when all gargoyles celebrate the longest night of the year."
GOLIATH: But we're not having one this year, so... go home.
Everyone cheered. Necromancer and his family remained quiet. Goliath held up his hand for silence.
" Now is the time for a story to be told," Goliath said, smiling. " Who would like to tell it?" Immediately Necromancer, Shania, and their twins stepped forward.
BROOKLYN: I wanted to tell them my Shamu tale.
" We would," Necromancer announced. A hush came over the crowd. Everyone turned to look at them. Necromancer looked back, a determined expression on his face.
BROADWAY: That wasn't a look of determination. It was the look one gets when farting.
LEX: Ewwww!!!
" We would like the opportunity to tell this Solstice story," he said to Goliath. " If you will allow us to." Goliath looked at him and, with a cautious glance at the others, nodded.
FOX: Before their spines snapped and all their heads fell off at the exact same time. The End.
Necromancer smiled. " Thank you, Goliath," he said. Then he turned and went to what his rookery brothers dubbed 'The Ceremonial Chair'
LEX: Really? I always thought it was known as "the stool" or "the John".
BROOKLYN: Lex, what are you tal-- Oh.
and sat down. Shania and his two oldest children sat down on either side of him. His youngest came and sat on his lap.
HUDSON: Completely unaware, until it was too late, that the lad had wet himself.
LEX: (Youngest.) Daddy, your lap feels funny.
BROOKLYN: (himself.) Just ignore it, and it will go away soon.
Necromancer looked up, and beckoned to the gargoyles and humans to come closer. They did so, the hatchlings up front. Necromancer smiled a little. The hatchlings all had a curious and excited expression on their faces.
GOLIATH: They all wanted to know if the Aqua colored cow had eaten a Gobstopper like the girl did in that "Willy Wonka" movie.
BROADWAY: I'm not a cow... HEY!!!
He knew that they had never heard him tell a story; he didn't talk much anyway.
GOLIATH: Brooklyn's hobby was as a mime performing on Times Square.
LEX: Now there's an amusing image.
They knew him as the Teacher, the one who trained them to fight. They knew he was battle hardened, for he had many scars to prove it, and he was tough. He was a hard, tough, demanding teacher, and they all tried to prove to him who was the best warrior among them.
HUDSON: Aye, but they all failed miserably due to the fact that they all be crybabies.
They worked hard in their training, and all of them wished to win his approval.
(ALL CLEAR THEIR THROATS.)
He leaned back in his chair, and looked around at all of the gargoyles and humans. His smile waned, then vanished completely.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Who let one?
His look hardened, and finally, after everyone had sat down to listen, he began to speak.
BROOKLYN: A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
" This story begins over sixty years ago," he began. "It is a tale of death, of pain, and fear.
DEMONA: It's the story of the first time Broadway ate beans.
BROADWAY: Hey! That hurts my feelings!
DEMONA: Cram it, my young chubby one.
I speak of this only because I wish for you to understand my family, and me, and why we are the way we are.
LEX: Inbreeding?
ANGELA: Brooklyn�s rookery parents tripped acid?
BROADWAY: Twinkies?
ALL: Huh!?
Our story is true, and not a word of lie will I speak during this tale.
LEX: (Necromancer) Lest my nose grow.
Some of you may not be able to stand it all, for much of it is terrible.
ANGELA: Necromancer decided to tell it in pig Latin.
BROOKLYN: Umb-ass day stupid itch-bay.
But I will tell it all, and tell it true, and I advise to you all that this story of our past will not be pretty." He paused. Everyone was listening intently, and some were looking worried. Goliath, Lexington, Broadway, and Angela looked afraid.
KINGCOBRA: They knew Necromancer would talk about the time they �protected� and �served� each other that first night Goliath was back from Avalon.
They knew what was coming, he knew. They realized that he was going to tell them how he had changed from a wonderful, kind, loving person to another, evil person who had tried to destroy them.
LEX: Watching Martha Stewart tends to do that.
He spoke again. " My story begins May twenty-third, nineteen ninety nine....."
BROADWAY: (Necromancer) �where the Quarrymen shot off my wings and cornered me in an alley. The End.
**********************************
May 23, 1999
Manhattan, New York
The crimson gargoyle was gliding, gliding as fast as he could. He could hear the burring of the chopper's blades behind him, catching up fast.
BROADWAY: Brook must have been an idiot to think he could outrun a fast helicopter.
GOLIATH: I did once, when the Quarrymen first attacked.
BROADWAY: Their stuff sucks.
He looked back over his shoulder, once. ~ Shit,~ he thought. ~ They're gaining on me!~
BROOKLYN: Attack of the Me-loving-fangirls!!
He looked back ahead of him, only to see another helicopter coming at him. He tried to swerve out of the way, but he was too late. His wingtip was caught in the blades and they ripped it apart.
LEX: Ouch.
He screamed as he fell, and suddenly, he felt wire mesh surround him and hold him tight. He was no longer falling, but he was unable to move. A crackling sound filled the air, and suddenly he was engulfed in electricity. Lightning coursed through his body, and everything went black.
LEX: Double Ouch.
*************
The red gargoyle opened his eyes slowly, his entire body throbbing with pain as he tried to sit up. He groaned.
BROOKLYN: (dazed) Did anybody get the license plate of the helicopter that hit me?
A low chuckle answered his groan, and he looked up to see a human standing above him, whip in hand.
BROADWAY: He must be into some severe S&M treatment.
The gargoyle growled, showing his teeth.
KINGCOBRA: Behold the 'Teeth of Death'!
(EVERYONE STARES AT HIM WEIRDLY.)
The man chuckled again.
ELISA: (Man.) Nice teeth. You chew tinfoil with that?
" A feisty one, he is," the man said, to no one in particular. " I knew he would be." The man stopped talking for a moment, then fixed his eyes on the red gargoyle's forest green ones. " I've been watching you for some time, Brooklyn," the man said. " And you are very interesting."
BROADWAY: And here comes the slash!
(LEX AND KINGCOBRA BOTH START DROOLING.)
**************************************
The hatchlings gasped. They knew that when Necromancer had started the story that he had been talking about himself, but they had never heard his true name before. The name 'Brooklyn' was new to them, as they had always thought his name had been Necromancer.
LEX: And I always thought my name was "Get Me The Hell Out Of Here"!!
The red gargoyle shook his head, then continued with his story.
" As I was saying....."
DEMONA: (Brooklyn) Uh... what was I saying? It was, uh... I was saying... ah, never mind. Let us all go to our homes.
ALL: Yay!
DEMONA: When this is over.
ALL: Dammit!
***************************************
Brooklyn continued to glare at the man, then winced as he remembered his wing, which was almost destroyed.
BROOKLYN: You killed my favorite wing!
He dared not glance at it, for fear of the man attacking him suddenly.
BROADWAY: With heavy S&M.
BROOKLYN: Would you stop with that already?!
BROADWAY: Okay.
The man smiled again, and pulled something out from behind his back. It was a
BROADWAY: Piece of Roasted Chicken!
DEMONA: A spell to destroy humanity!
LEX: A Laptop!
tranquilizer gun.
BROADWAY: Ah, dang it!
He shook it at the gargoyle, and laughed.
(BROOKLYN MOCKS HIS LAUGHTER.)
" You don't want me to use this do you?" he asked. "Now, I'm going to put this collar on you," the man showed him a metal collar that was an ebony black and glittered menacingly, and continued talking. " And if you try to kill me, I'll shoot you with this."
FOX: The very best equipment in Nerf artillery.
Brooklyn snarled. " I will not be collared," he hissed. " I don't belong to you."
The man laughed. " You do now." Then he took out a key, and opened the cage door. Brooklyn growled and backed away. The man advanced on him, gun pointed and collar held out. Inscribed on the collar was a name. Brooklyn read it.
BROOKLYN: (reading an invisible collar) 'Harold Buckwaiter'. Hey, dude, you gave me the wrong collar!
Jonathan Blake. Suddenly, Brooklyn realized that the man wanted to keep him as a pet,
LEX: He wants to put the $300 he spent on garg treats to good use.
or something of the like anyway. ~ Over my dead body,~ he thought.
LEX: (Blake) That can be arranged. Now, assume the position!
He growled, and leaped for the man's throat. The man jumped out of the way, and Brooklyn hit the bars of the cage with a painful smack!
BROOKLYN: I would never be that clumsy!
LEX: No, but you'd be that drunk, with your women problems and all.
BROOKLYN: Knock it off, muttonhead!
and fell to the ground. A sharp pain in his arm told him that the man had shot him with the tranquilizer gun.
BROADWAY: As did the dart that was jutting out of his arm.
He felt everything start to go dim, and he struggled to rise.
ELISA: But couldn�t due to the heavyweight draped across his back.
LEX: I never knew Brooklyn had Broadway draped to his back.
BROADWAY: Hey now!
Quickly, the man approached him and snapped the collar around his neck. Brooklyn tried to fight back, but he was too slow, and the man stepped away.
FOX: And stumbled backwards, losing his balance, which made him crash out the window and plummet like a rock to his doom. The End.
The man, whose name Brooklyn surmised, was Jonathan Blake, stood staring at him, chuckling softly. "You're mine, Brooklyn,"
KINGCOBRA: In bed.
he said. Then he paused a moment. " I think I will give you a new name.
LEX: Here�s your new name, Big Bubba.
But only when you have earned it in the ring."
BROADWAY: Ooh. Heh. So Blake gets killed by the girl in the TV set?
KINGCOBRA: Not THAT �ring�, fatass.
(BROADWAY KICKS KINGCOBRA IN THE BACK OF THE SHIN. KING RESPONDS BY SPINNING AROUND AND PLANTING HIS FOOT ACROSS BROADWAY�S FACE. THE GARGOYLE HITS THE FLOOR, UNCONSCIOUS.)
ALL: (applauding) Thanks for finally shutting him up!
KINGCOBRA: (takes a bow)
LEX: Hey, I'm starting to like this guy.
Jonathan laughed again and walked out of the cage. Then he turned back, and smiled maliciously at Brooklyn.
GOLIATH: (Blake) Behold the smile of death.
"Just in case you try to escape, that collar will send powerful electric shocks through your body, rendering you unable to move.
BROOKLYN: Eh, I once sat through a whole episode of �Full House�. Electrical shocks are nothing.
I don't think you want that, and your future training will be much worse.
LEX: (Blake) You will be my bitch!
Well, it's almost dawn. I think that I should leave you to your stone sleep. Don't worry," he added, as he closed the door of the cage. "If I had wanted to kill you, I would have done it already."
ALL: Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!
The last thing Brooklyn heard before he turned to stone was Jonathan Blakes' horrible laughter in his ears, and then silence.
HUDSON: (With authority) SILENCE!!
(ALL STARE.)
********************************
Necromancer paused in his story.
ELISA: (Necromancer) Please excuse me while I plot to kill you all.
Everyone was leaning forward in their seats, watching him intently.
FOX: They all suddenly noticed the huge zit on his beak.
(ALL SNICKER.)
LEX: No more Hershey�s bars for him.
He looked at the hatchlings, and saw in their eyes the hatred for Jonathan Blake already brewing there. From what their teacher was telling them, they hated the man already, even though they didn't know him.
~ They're going to hate him more later,~ Necromancer thought, as he breathed in a deep sigh.
GOLIATH: Which turned into a huge yawn.
KINGCOBRA: (struggling) Please don't mention the 'Y' word. (Loses the battle, and yawns loudly, then collects himself.) Dammit!
(ALL SNICKER.)
He spoke again.
" The next night was the worst night of my life. It was the night my training began..."
LEX: (Singing.) Gotta catch 'em all, gotta catch 'em all..
ALL: (Ditto.) PO-KE-MON!!!
*******************************
Brooklyn awoke from his stone sleep, roaring.
ALL: (singing) Like a rock... Oh, like a rock...
He shook the last remnants of stone out of his hair and looked around. He was in some sort of a gym, with weapons and guns all over the walls.
KINGCOBRA: And bodies stitched to the ceiling.
He looked at his wrists, and found that he was chained. He reached up and found that the collar was still there.
LEX: (Brooklyn) Wait. I have a collar?
He tried to pull it off, but suddenly a shocking pain went through his whole body.
ELISA: Blake had installed a metal plate in his head that picked up the reception of a radio station.
LEX: Unfortunately, said station was playing "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion.
He screamed, and sank to his knees, clutching his throat. The pain intensified, and he began to writhe on the floor, clawing at his throat.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Agh!!! Argh!! Somebody give me the Heimlich!!
(KINGCOBRA MIMICS DOING THE HEIMLICH.)
BROOKLYN: (himself) Oww! You crushed my ribs!
He screamed and arched his back, shocks of electricity running down his spine.
FOX: Shock therapy! HA!
Then, suddenly, the pain stopped. Brooklyn gasped for breath, and tried to get to his feet, panting heavily.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Wow, that was intense. Now, as long as that doesn't happen again... AAARRRGHHHHHHHH!!!!!
LEX: (as Blake, malicious laughter)
(BROADWAY GETS TO HIS FEET, RUBBING HIS CHIN.)
ALL: Aw, dammit!
BROADWAY: Hey, uh, what exactly happened?
LEX: You slipped on some food on the floor, and hit your head.
BROADWAY: I did?
LEX: (lying through his teeth) Uh-huh.
(BROADWAY DROPS TO HIS KNEE AND STARTS LICKING THE FLOOR WITH HIS TONGUE, SEARCHING FOR THE FOOD. LEX LOOKS DISGUSTED AND RETURNS TO THE FIC.)
He looked up through watery eyes to see Jonathan Blake standing in front of him, dressed in some strange armor.
ELISA: (Blake, with English accent) Fare thee well, my sir Gargoyle, for I am off to attend a 'Knights Of The Round Table' convention.
It was silver and black, and at his waist were weapons of all sorts, ranging from a small dagger to a huge gun strapped across his back.
LEX: He'd really be something to see if he was walking down the street like that.
He smiled.
FOX: (Blake) How do you like my beautiful pearly whites?
" Hey, Brooklyn," he said cheerily, as though they were friends. " It's time to start your training. Now," he continued. " Since I don't want you calling me any bad names,
BROOKLYN: Shithead bastard.
I want you to call me Blake." Brooklyn snarled.
" I'll call you whatever I want, you bastard!" he hissed. He screamed again as electricity rocked his body.
BROOKLYN: I like to rock!
He groaned and slumped down to the ground. The shock passed,
KINGCOBRA: The Phil Collins concert was over.
and Brooklyn, shaking, got back to his feet. He glared at Blake, who was now holding a whip in one hand, and a huge, mean looking riding stick in the other.
"Now, we
BROADWAY: Go to bed and wrestle.
train," he said, his voice turning cruel and horrible.
********************************
" I don't believe it," Angela whispered, as Necromancer spoke of the rest of that first night of training. What he was describing was bloody and made her cringe.
DEMONA: He had spent the first night of his training at a mosh pit.
The hatchlings all had sour, pained looks on their faces; she could tell that if any of them could, they'd kill Blake in an instant.
BROOKLYN: Yes! YES! Kill Blake! End the fic now! KILL HIM, KILL HIM!!
LEX: You scare the crap out of me sometimes.
Her daughter had started crying, and she was now comforting her.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn, singing) Hush, Little Baby, please don't cry... Daddy's gonna make the bad man die...
" How could anyone be so cruel?"
BROADWAY: It's easy. Isn't it, Brooklyn, you constipated looking sack of bird-man crap?
BROOKLYN: Shut up.
" I don't know," Broadway answered.
Necromancer looked up, hearing them talk. He smiled grimly. Then he started talking
LEX: About his women troubles.
again.
" That night he took nearly every hand held weapon he had to me.
BROADWAY: (Saddam Hussein, from South Park) Yeah, you like that, don't you, bitch?
The whip, the club, the stick, each one he had named something different. Not only that, he used the electric collar. Every second of that night was pure agony.
LEX: Brooklyn was forced to watch "Home Improvement" reruns.
And for the next few weeks it was the same. Training, training and more training. Sometimes he would fight me physically, using his spiked gloves and belt. Then it was all physical training. He would teach me all sorts of holds, ways to kick, nerve points to hit, different punches.
FOX: Different sexual positions.
BROOKLYN: Fox...
LEX: I personally like Missionary the best.
BROOKLYN: Lex!
KINGCOBRA: Me, too.
(BROOKLYN CLIPS HIS HANDS OVER HIS EARS AND STARTS SINGING METALLICA.)
He used them all against me, until I learned how to do it myself.
(LOTS OF THROAT CLEARING.)
Then he would try something new, and more pain was introduced to me. At first, I had a hope that Goliath and the others would come to save me.
ALL: (singing) Rescue me... Protect me in your arms... Rescue me...
That faith soon began to dissipate..."
BROOKLYN: ...into a deep depression that made me kill myself. The End.
**********************************
Brooklyn lay in his cage on the cold stone floor, shivering.
BROADWAY: Monica Lewinsky was standing in front of him naked.
He wanted to cry but still, after a whole year, he refused to. He knew that the next night, the pain would come back. Blake would make sure of it. He shivered again. He was so cold. Every time he moved, another shock of pain made him immobile. Each wound was a new horizon of agony, and that horizon was endless. He wanted to die.
ALL: (except Brooklyn) So do it! Spare us any further torture!
(BROOKLYN GLARES AT THE REST OF THEM.)
~ Why hasn't Goliath come?~ he thought. ~ He should have come by now!~
ANGELA: He never came because he got distracted by Elisa's... bedroom....
(ALL HUM PORN MUSIC.)
Brooklyn curled himself into a ball, trying to ignore the pain. He could feel his body protesting at the movement, and he froze, waiting for the pain to abate some. He retreated into his mind, not forgetting the pain, he could never forget it,
LEX: And we can never forget ours, being forced into these experiments.
ELISA: Look at it this way! At least this is one of the better fics we've done!
LEX: True. Thank god, or whatever, for Pestilence's incredible writing skills.
but he pushed it out of the way for the moment.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Get outta my way!
He began to think, like he had for the past year, about his clan.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) I wonder if they're all still douches?
He couldn't understand why they hadn't come to save him yet.
FOX: They could, but they don't want to.
LEX: Actually, we would NEVER abandon him like that.
They should know by now that something was wrong. They had to be looking for him. Elisa, too. She could find things out that Goliath couldn't.
KINGCOBRA: Like where her tiny breasts were.
ELISA: Hey!
(KINGCOBRA SNICKERS.)
She was a police officer, for Christ's sake. She should have found something by now!
Brooklyn squeezed his eyes shut, forcing back the tears that threatened to fall. ~Why wont they come?~
LEX: I didn't know the clan was having an orgy.
Don't they care about me?
GOLIATH: No.
he thought. ~ I thought clan was everything.~
LEX: The clan is everything or nothing.
ALL: Huh?
He went further into his mind, thinking harder than ever.
BROOKLYN: (Einstein) The theory of relativity is...
~ I love them,~
ANGELA: (Whitney Houston, singing) ...And I-I-I-I will always love you-u-u-u-u-u...
KINGCOBRA: (holding his hands over his ears, blood seeping between his fingers) SOMEBODY MAKE HER STOP!
(ANGELA STOPS SINGING, BLINKING IN SURPRISE.)
he thought, though it was a forced thought. ~ I love them so much. Where are they?
LEX: (throaty voice) Today on VH1, Where Are They Now? Starting at 12 PM, 11 Central.
Lex, Broadway, my rookery brothers. My best friends. Where are you?
LEX: I'm surfing the web.
BROADWAY: And I'm in the middle of a sandwich.
Hudson, my mentor.
HUDSON: Aye?
Where are you?
HUDSON: Och! Can't a soul watch Conan O'Brien in peace?!
Angela and Elisa, my friends. Why aren't you guys here to help me?
ANGELA/ELISA: We're playing Parcheesi at the totaled clock tower.
Bronx, my pet. You were always there to protect me.
KINGCOBRA: (Bronx) Woof. Now stop whining!
LEX: But Bronx never actually spoke. Not in words.
KINGCOBRA: Poetic license.
You were always there with me through the hard times,
BROOKLYN: Like when I got caught peeping in on Angela that time.
BROADWAY: (quiet rage) So, that was you?
along with Lex and Broadway. Where are you? Goliath, where are you? You're my leader, you're supposed to protect me. Where are you? Why aren't you here? I thought you loved me.~
KINGCOBRA: Sheesh, Brooklyn, don't get me wrong, I like you and all, but I've got problems too!
With that thought, the tears finally began to fall. ~Maybe they don't love me at all,~ he thought. ~ Maybe...maybe...they don't care. Why wouldn't they, though? They always helped me before, why is this different? Why me? Why did Blake pick me? Am I the only one who has to go through this? Are there others? What happened to their clan? Why? Why, God? Why?!~
KINGCOBRA: Poor Brooklyn. Waa.
BROOKLYN: Alright, now knock it off.
KINGCOBRA: Okay.
Brooklyn didn't try to fight back the tears now.
BROOKLYN: Stay away from me, tears!
The tears were all he had left. He thought that if his clan loved him at all, they would have come by now.
GOLIATH: We were on our way when we got detailed by Castaway being turned into a Gargoyle hatchling.
LEX: That's a shameless Storyseeker plug.
GOLIATH: Yes, but I still enjoyed reading it.
KINGCOBRA: You and I both.
~ Did they plan this? Was it their idea to do this to me? If it was, why? How could they do this to me? I just want to go home.~
BROOKLYN: (Dorothy) Toto, I don't think we're in Wyvern anymore!
His face was now drenched with tears, and he began to heave
FOX: Can you wait until we get you a bucket first?
BROOKLYN: Fox, I don't think Pestilence meant that
kind of heaving.
FOX: Oh.
slightly. His shoulders shook, which caused him more pain. That only served to remind him of his current situation.
KINGCOBRA: He's being held captive by a Big Bubba/Punisher wannabe who's into heavy S&M. Nice situation.
He let out a small sob. He started to breath louder, gasping with pain and sorrow. He sniffed, and then let out another sob, his voice echoing in the small confines of his cage.
(ALL MAKE VARIOUS SNIFFING AND SOBBING NOISES.)
BROOKLYN: Okay, you all can stop now.
(ENCORE SNIFFING AND SOBS.)
BROOKLYN: I said STOP!!
(ALL CEASE.)
His new home. That's what Blake had said this was, his new home. He didn't believe it then, but he believed it now. ~ I'll never get back,~
KINGCOBRA: to 1985 A.D., to reunite my parents so I'll be born.
LEX: (snickers) Don't tell me you're a "Back To The Future" fan.
KINGCOBRA: The first one wasn't bad.
Brooklyn thought. He let out another sob, louder this time. Then louder.
BROOKLYN: And louder, then louder.
LEX: Until his head could no longer take the pressure and exploded.
KINGCOBRA: The end.
Then he began to cry in earnest, his sobs turning into cries, which turned into wails. He breathed in a loud gasp, then let loose with a keening wail of misery and pain.
KINGCOBRA: Wow, and I thought I had depression issues.
His shoulders shook violently, and he began to twitch convulsively. He kicked his legs, and his tail thumped on the floor. His wings fluttered and he raised his head and let out a howl. Tears coursed down from his closed eyes, and he keened again and again, finally realizing that his clan wasn't going to come, after all.
~ They're not coming,~ he thought. ~ They're not coming, they never will, never will, they don't love me at all, they never did. I gave them all I had and more,
KINGCOBRA: That actually is what I used to think about
people before I started making friends online.
LEX: See? Computers are wonderful.
KINGCOBRA: Yep.
and they won't come to help me!~ Brooklyn swallowed the blood in his throat,
BROOKLYN: I had suddenly, and inexplicably, morphed into Dracula.
then coughed, another sob wrenching him into more pain.
A sudden cough caught his attention. He looked up quickly, and saw Blake standing there, grinning like a cat.
BROADWAY: (Blake) How do you like my Cheshire impression?
" I thought you'd never break," Blake said, his voice like venom. Brooklyn gasped slightly, and crawled away from the door of the cage, cringing.
LEX: (Brooklyn) Please! No more S & M!
Blake's smile widened.
KINGCOBRA: As he farted.
BROOKLYN: (Blake) Oops, sorry. I had Chalupas for lunch.
" You're a clean slate now, Brook," Blake said. His smile got so big Brooklyn thought it would split his face. " Tonight the real training begins."
The sun rose.
ALL: (singing.) Sun doesn't rise at all... Who knows how far I'll fall?...
**************************************
Necromancer paused in his story to take a shuddering breath.
KINGCOBRA: Can somebody turn down the thermostat, please?
The whole clan was staring at him, horror and pity written all over their faces.
LEX: They just found out about all the Brooklyn/Demona fics out there.
(BOTH OF THEM GLARE AT LEX.)
Necromancer looked back at them. That was one of the hardest things he had ever had to say in his whole life, to tell them what had happened that night.
BROOKLYN: Well, story's over. Let's go.
DEMONA: You wish!
He had never spoken of it before, not even to Shania, who was his mate. He looked at Goliath, who looked like he was going to have a heart attack at any moment.
KINGCOBRA: HA! YES! Goliath's gonna have a heart attack!
(EVERYONE BUT GOLIATH START DANCING. GOLIATH SCOWLS.)
Goliath's daughter stood with him, her hand clutching his in horror.
BROOKLYN: (Goliath, dancing around as though in pain.) Uh... Angela, you're squeezing too hard, can you just... Ah! Ow! Leggo! Leggo my hand!! Someone make her let go of me!!!
Necromancer felt small arms encircle his neck, and he looked down to see his son looking up at him, eyes wide and lip quivering.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer.) Uh, sorry for asking, but... do I know you?
He wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tightly to himself. Sauron snuggled under Necromancer's beak, trying to give comfort. Necromancer smiled.
When he glanced back up at the others, they were all watching. Some were still reeling from the shock of what he had just told them. They had their hands over their mouths, or they were clutching their mates, as though afraid to let go of them, in case they were ever caught away from them like he had been.
He looked at Alex Xanatos, David Xanatos' son, who was holding his wife and son in a death grip.
LEX: (Alex's wife) Urck... Honey... *GAG* Can you... can you loosen up, please...? I can't... breathe...
Only Alex had guessed at the extent of the hurt Necromancer had felt so many years ago. Necromancer shook his head, then continued with his story.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) ...So, then the three bears came home, found Goldilocks asleep in Baby Bear's bed, and promptly called 911. The police arrived five minutes late, and Papa Bear said "Take this house-breaking bitch off to jail before I lose control and eat her alive!" Goldilocks ended up with a 25 year sentence. The End.
(EVERYBODY STARES AT HIM LIKE HE HAS THREE HEADS.)
" The next night, my real training began. It started with Black Death...."
BROOKLYN: and Black Death's identical twin, Black Plague.
**********************************
The red gargoyle awoke with a roar of rage. He glanced around the cage quickly, making sure Blake was not there. He growled when he heard the familiar chuckle of his human captor.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Heh. Heh heh heh heh heh. Ah, Meatwad.
He turned to see Blake standing in front of the door to his cage, grinning evilly. Brooklyn snarled, remembering what Blake had said the night before.
BROADWAY: And also remembering what Blake had done the night before.
BROOKLYN: Can we please stop with the gay jokes?
LEX: (peeved) Yeah!
KINGCOBRA: I second that.
" Now the real training begins."
Brooklyn stood, head erect,
BROOKLYN: Nobody go there!
eyes blazing defiance. Blake smiled. " I knew you were ready. Now you're going to meet your new opponent."
DEMONA: (Blake) Meet your new opponent. He's a cartoon critter from Disney who got his start in a 1935 black and white animated short.
KINGCOBRA: (singsong) M-I-C-K-E-Y-M-O-U-S-E!!
He grinned as he opened the cage door. Brooklyn stepped out, watching every move Blake made. He didn't try to escape: he had learned long ago not to try that. He didn't trust Blake, but he knew that if he didn't try to escape while on the way to the gym, he wouldn't be hurt.
BROOKLYN: Considering that I'm being held prisoner by a sadistic psycho, who enjoys using shock therapy on me, why would I think that I wouldn't be hurt?
That was for later, during training.
The two walked along, Blake in the front, Brooklyn following close behind. As they walked, Blake spoke.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Oh, yeah, feel my ass, baby!
"Stop here," he said, pointing to a closet.
LEX: (Blake) And get in. I'll be in there in a second.
BROADWAY: You would, Lex.
LEX: You bet I would!
Brooklyn growled, tensing up. Blake just glanced at him, and opened the door.
KINGCOBRA: Unfortunately, he forgot about the starved mountain Lion that he had locked away in there and Blake quickly became Simba's tasty treat. The End.
LEX: You've got a depraved imagination there, King.
KINGCOBRA: (shrugs) Hey, it's my gift. What can I say?
He reached inside, and took out a duffel bag, which looked stuffed. He tossed it to Brooklyn,
BROOKLYN: Promptly knocking me to the floor.
then led the red gargoyle to another room, where he opened the door and shoved him inside.
ELISA: (Blake) Get yer ass in there, Beaky!
(BROOKLYN GLARES AT ELISA.)
"Change,�
GOLIATH: Is never easy.
Blake said roughly. " You're going to need those clothes." Then he shut the door, and Brooklyn proceeded to change into the clothes that were inside the bag.
BROADWAY: Which turned out to be Kagome's outfit from Inuyasha.
(KINGCOBRA STARTS LAUGHING AT THE MENTAL IMAGE.)
BROOKLYN: You die tonight, Broadway.
He looked them over, as though they might be poisonous.
LEX: Poisonous clothes. Yeah, sure.
He began to put them on, first the iron shoulder guards, hooked up to bendable metal straps that made an X across his chest, then the leather pants. The metal straps were hooked to a large black belt that had small component holders for small things. Next, he saw a silver hair tie, and he donned that too, knowing that if he got one thing wrong Blake would beat the piss out of him.
Even though he was cruel, and dangerous, he was fair enough.
KINGCOBRA: (grinning from ear to ear) You can say that again!
BROOKLYN: You're gay?
KINGCOBRA: Bisexual.
BROOKLYN: Oh.
Blake may have taken him prisoner and beaten him nearly to death every night for the past year,
BROADWAY: Amongst other things.
(BROOKLYN GLARES AT BROADWAY, A WARNING IN HIS EYES. BROADWAY TUCKS HIS ARMS BEHIND HIS BACK AND STARTSWHISTLING INNOCENTLY, INTENTLY KEEPING HIS EYESTRAINED ON THE CEILING.)
even though he did not deserve it, but he was usually rewarded if he got something right.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Good boy. Here's a treat.
Not the usual reward, mind you, but sometimes Blake went a little bit easier on him if he got a fighting technique right, and he even got to get out of training early one night, which surprised Brooklyn a lot.
LEX: Blake had gotten a bad headache and wanted to retire in front of the TV to watch 'Family guy'.
HUDSON: Och, I wish I could be doin' that this very second.
He finished dressing, and turned around. He looked at himself in the mirror which was in the corner, and saw himself.
BROADWAY: (Brooklyn) Gods, am I scary looking!
(BROOKLYN WHAPS BROADWAY IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD.)
He nearly jumped back in surprise and fear.
BROADWAY: See?
The gargoyle in the mirror looked like himself, but there was something different.
KINGCOBRA: Blake had tied Brooklyn down and dyed his hair green.
This gargoyle looked battle hardened, and bitter.
BROOKLYN: Why wouldn't I look bitter? My beautiful hair's been turned green!
He had a suspicious look on his face, which was scarred across the left eye.
KINGCOBRA: God, I wish I had a scar across my eye. Scars are cool.
LEX: Now you're scaring me.
His body language was tough, and the look in his eyes plainly told anyone and everyone to "back off, don't fuck with me".
BROOKLYN: That includes you, Demona.
One look at this gargoyle and even Hercules would have thought twice about picking a fight.
KINGCOBRA: I doubt that, but Brooklyn IS tougher.
He noted that he had increased in size;
(THROAT CLEARING.)
he was about two or three inches taller than he was before, and his chest had broadened. Large muscles bulged beneath his red flesh, which was scarred from his training.
He looked at his reflection, and smiled nastily. Then he stopped.
BROOKLYN: As my Green hair suddenly turned Orange.
~ What am I thinking?~ he asked himself. He didn't want to be mean, but then again, he thought that since the world was cruel to him, he would be cruel to it.
KINGCOBRA: Amen to that!
~ One day, I'll-- ~
ANGELA: (Brooklyn) --win the prize on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire'.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) --outwrestle Chris Benoit.
DEMONA: (ditto) --destroy all humanity.
KINGCOBRA: In your wildest dreams.
he thought, his eyes beginning to glow. A sudden knock on the door interrupted his thoughts.
LEX: Hello. Domino's. You wanted the Pepperoni Supreme with a side of cheese bread? That'll be $9.95.
"Come on, asshole, hurry up!" Blake called viciously through the door. " You're opponent is waiting!" Brooklyn snarled under his breath.
BROOKLYN: I'm snarling because I have to go kick the smarmy Green Power Ranger's ass.
"I can't wait," he whispered softly, walking to the door and opening it. He stalked out, looking like he would and could take on anyone and anything. Blake smiled nastily at him,
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Ha ha, you have to fight for your life while I get to stand there and watch.
then continued down the hall until they reached the gym.
Blake flung open the doors and stalked in like he was above it all.
BROOKLYN: He really is 'above it all', considering that he had Taco Bell burritos for dinner.
KINGCOBRA: Also considering the people that cowered in terror when they smelled him coming.
Brooklyn followed, noticing that there was another human in the gym.
KINGCOBRA: (Bill Clinton) My fellow Americans, I am pleased to be -- OOF!!
(ALL MAKE VARIOUS FIGHTING AND SNARLING SOUNDS.)
He snarled. He felt loathe to be near this human, for some reason. He didn't know him, but right away he hated him.
BROOKLYN: Because he had nice, non-green, hair.
"Is this human my opponent, Blake?" he hissed, eyes starting to glow. ~ I hope he is,~ he thought. All he wanted to do was kill this human. He felt that the human had trespassed on his territory, and no human had any right to do that.
A sudden electric shock made him wince, then he twitched convulsively.
KINGCOBRA: Brooklyn is beginning to find this match shocking.
BROOKLYN: That's an old joke.
KINGCOBRA: I grew up listening to my parents' corny 'humor'. Not my fault.
He had gotten used to the pain of electricity by now, though it still hurt.
"No, he isn't," Blake said, hate in his voice. " That is your opponent," he concluded, pointing to
LEX: Kane from WWE, who was standing in the corner.
KINGCOBRA: If that was really true, Brooklyn would probably get his ass kicked.
a dark corner on the far side of the room. He looked closer, and saw a dark grey shape emerge from the shadows. He was only a little bit surprised to see another gargoyle approach the other man, and kneel before him. The other man pet the grey gargoyle's head, then turned back to look at Blake, smiling triumphantly, as though he had proved something important. Blake snorted.
~ What a dog, ~
GOLIATH: The Gargoyle had started humping the human's leg.
Brooklyn thought. ~ Kneeling before that human as if he were a god.~
"Brooklyn, meet Black Death,"
FOX: And Brooklyn promptly did. The End.
was all he heard Blake say before he stepped out onto the gym mat. He beckoned to the grey gargoyle, whose name, he thought with a laugh, was Black Death.
BROOKLYN: (Nelson Muntz) Ha-HA!
His opponent looked to his master for guidance, and when the man nodded, also stepped out onto the mat.
KINGCOBRA: (as mat) Oof! Get da hell off me!!
Black Death's eyes began to glow as the grey gargoyle advanced on the crimson one. He smiled, showing all the large fangs in his beak,
FOX: Which is Black Death's way of saying 'hello'.
KINGCOBRA: (Black Death) Hi, how you doing? Put 'er there.
and his eyes also began to glow.
"All right, Brooklyn," Blake said from behind him. "Let's show this grey turd what you can do."
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Behold my 'Shadow Puppets of Death'!
The red gargoyle smiled, baring his fangs to the gums, as he began to move more quickly toward his opponent.
GOLIATH: (Metallic voice) Round 1... FIGHT!!!
The grey gargoyle also moved faster, and Brooklyn dropped to all fours, picking up speed as he went. Black Death followed suit, and the two raced across the mat toward each other, growls that soon turned to roars as they attacked.
KINGCOBRA: This is what it would be like if Fox ever did a special called "When Angry Gargoyles attack!"
FOX: I don't do specials. Well, there was that one time the Pack and I were at Madison Square Gardens, but...
KINGCOBRA: Not you! I meant the Fox Channel!
FOX: Oh. Sorry.
Black Death leaped into the air as Brooklyn raced into him. He sailed over the red gargoyle's head and landed softly behind him.
BROADWAY: (Brooklyn) Hey! Where'd you go? Are you... OOF! Ah, there you are...OWWWWW!!!!!
Already, though, Brooklyn had turned around, and was leaping for the grey gargoyle's throat.
LEX: Upon reaching it, Brooklyn promptly ripped his throat out, bringing an end to this awful fight scene.
KINGCOBRA: Awful!? I love this! This fight is great!
LEX: You WOULD think that.
Black Death was caught by surprise at this quick attack, and tried to get out of the way but was too slow. Brooklyn laughed inside at the astonished expression on his opponents' face as he rammed into him, knocking the wind out of the grey gargoyle.
ELISA: (fake wheezing) *HUFF* Okay... j-just gimme a minute... let me get to my... feet... and then I-I'll kick you ass so *HUFF PUFF WHEEZE* hard that... you'd need anesthesia just to fart...
Brooklyn spun around as Black Death began to recover, and smacked the grey gargoyle upside the head with his tail, then kicked him with his foot. Black Death fell backwards and Brooklyn took the chance to leap on top of him. As he landed on him, the grey gargoyle brought his feet up and caught Brooklyn in the stomach.
DEMONA: Gutting him open with the talons on his feet. Brooklyn crawled away and then promptly died. The End.
With a powerful kick, Brooklyn was thrown off the grey gargoyle and into the air.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn, sarcasm) Hi, Mom! I hope you're watching this at home! Your baby boy's getting his ass stomped! You must be so proud...
Brooklyn somersaulted through the air, and, with a neat flip, landed silently on the mat. Brooklyn snarled, but before he could attack again,
LEX: Black Death stepped on a tiny wooden fragment, got a splinter in his foot, and had to forfeit the match.
Black Death attacked. He dug his claws into Brooklyn's shoulders,
ANGELA: (Black Death) Hi, let me get this pesky fly off your left shoulder there.
and threw him across the room.
BROOKLYN: Hey, look! I can fly!
LEX: No, you don't. You glide.
BROOKLYN: You know what I mean.
Brooklyn hit the mat and rolled, ignoring the pain in his shoulder and the blood pouring from the wound.
KINGCOBRA: And the insects buzzing around the open wound.
The next instant Black Death was upon him, slashing and hacking with his talons.
BROOKLYN: Plastic Surgery-- the mad Gargoyle way.
Brooklyn shrieked in rage, and fought back, hate driving him all the way.
FOX: Until hate got a ticket for going 65 in a 40 M.P.H. zone.
His mind began to wander
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Hmmm... did I leave Blake's oven on? Ah, well, small potatoes...
as he fought back against the grey gargoyle. He thought about the times he and his rookery brothers (Lexington and Broadway ) had fought together against their enemies. He thought about how his clan fought together, and how they looked out for each other during the battles.
Then he thought about how they had betrayed him, how they had left him to Blake. His eyes began to glow white hot. They had left him to some nutcase who beat him mercilessly every night. They didn't care about him at all. They had betrayed him. He would get back at them someday. His lips pulled back from his teeth, he swore silently that he would kill them. He would kill them, oh, yes. He would make them pay for what they had done to him. He would make Blake pay, too.
Oh, yes. He would have his revenge.
KINGCOBRA: (shudders) I don't like this. Brooklyn's starting to think like the old me would've.
But first, for Black Death. He would suffer first.
LEX: Brooklyn pulled a feather from the air and startled tickling Black's feet until he was crying.
He growled once, then went on a vengeance streak against Black Death, lashing out with his talons. Black Death swiped at him with his talons, but Brooklyn was quicker, and lunged up from underneath the other gargoyle and,
GOLIATH: (metallic voice) FINISH HIM!
with his horns, pierced his opponents' ribcage.
Black Death screamed in pain, then his scream turned bubbly as blood poured out of his throat. Brooklyn hissed, and, with a quick movement of his hand, sliced his throat open.
KINGCOBRA: (Black Death) Hey, is that any way to treat me after I invited you over for beers?
BROOKLYN: (himself) All you had was Miller's Lite! DIE!!
He stood back and watched the grey gargoyle die. Blood poured from his stomach and throat, and, after a moment, the gargoyle closed his eyes. His breathing slowed, and he died.
GOLIATH: (metallic voice) BROOKLYN WINS. FATALITY.
Brooklyn felt his heart soar,
LEX: Out of his chest. Quite literally. The End.
and he smiled triumphantly. He threw his head back and roared at the ceiling, announcing that he had drawn first blood. He had won his first battle, and soon, he thought, he would win more.
KINGCOBRA: Rambo: First blood. Great movie, according to my cousin.
LEX: Have you every actually seen it yourself?
KINGCOBRA: Not yet. But I'm gonna rent it next time I'm at the Video store.
Those words had so much meaning for him now. It was like a transition from one level to another, and he had just achieved it. He felt as though he could touch the sky,
ALL: (singing) I believe I can fly... I believe I can touch the sky-y-y-y....
do anything, because he had drawn first blood. This was his first step, on his way to revenge.
He looked back to see Blake applauding him, a smile on his face. Not an evil smile, but a pleased smile,
BROOKLYN: (Yoda) May the force be with you.
like he had worked hard on something and had won first place with it.
Brooklyn looked at the other man, who was glaring at him with fury in his eyes, and a snarl on his lips.
KINGCOBRA: (man) You sank my Battleship!
Brooklyn growled, and curled his lip at him, while blood dripped from his jaws, as well as saliva. He grinned maliciously as the other man turned, and stalked out of the room.
"Come here, my friend," Blake called to Brooklyn suddenly. Brooklyn turned, and walked toward him, still on all fours. He kept his lip curled; he couldn't seem to help but to smile in a nasty manner. He felt nasty then, and he liked the feeling.
KINGCOBRA: (grins) If only Necromancer was real... he'd be awesome to hang out with...
Blake looked down at him, a smile curved on his lips. �I know what to name you now," he said, his eyes narrowing, though the smile stayed.
KINGCOBRA: Darth Maul!
LEX: Bill Gates!
DEMONA: Alexander The Great!
"What is it, Blake?" Brooklyn hissed. His voice was almost always a hiss now. It was just the way he talked, and frankly, he liked talking like that. It made him feel intimidating.
BROADWAY: And his breath was even more intimidating, after ripping out Black Death's throat.
ALL: (wave a hand in front of their noses) Whoo!
Blake smiled.
"Your ring name will be.....Necromancer," Blake said, his smile widening at Brooklyn's pleased expression.
BROOKLYN: Heh heh heh. He has no idea yet that I left his oven on...
"Necromancer..." he repeated. Then he looked up at Blake and curled his lip. " I think I like that, Blake. I really do."
Blake laughed. " I thought you would," he said.
Necromancer smiled. Then laughed.
~ Brooklyn will have his revenge,~ he thought. ~ But Necromancer will be the one to deliver it.~
ALL: (Ominous) DUN DUN DUN!!!
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Hi. Thank you for calling Necromancer's. How can I help you?
**************************************
Necromancer paused in his story, and glanced at the clan around him. They all looked horror-stricken. He smiled grimly. "That was the night I changed for good.
LEX: Into a circus clown.
I was never the same after that. The night of my first blood Brooklyn died, and Necromancer rose in his place. I was......"
BROOKLYN: Abducted by a UFO.
KINGCOBRA: Sleeping next to Bigfoot after our drunken Vegas wedding.
LEX: Transported by Puck to the 'Planet Of The Apes'.
Necromancer trailed off, not knowing what he was going to say next. He shook himself, and spoke again,
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) I'm sorry. What was I saying?
finishing his sentence. " I was a killer
KINGCOBRA: Jason Voorhees!
DEMONA: Michael Myers!
ELISA: My long lost cousin, Herman Maza!
ALL: Huh?
now. I had almost no heart, and all I wanted was revenge. Blake felt I was ready to go to the ring now,
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) To fight Kane, where I quickly got stomped into the ground. The End.
and we went to Mexico
KINGCOBRA: (Mexican accent) Si, senor'. Welcome to May-hee-co.
to fight in the professional ring." He paused. " On the way, he introduced me to his other....'pets'."
LEX: Meet Sparky, my gay dog!
KINGCOBRA: You stole that from 'South Park'.
LEX: No. I borrowed IT from �South Park�.
**************************************
Necromancer, as he called himself now, sat in the cage, chained up again. He didn't like being chained up, but he didn't have much of a choice
BROADWAY: It was either that, or he would be forced to watch old 'All In The Family' reruns.
BROOKLYN: (mock-horror) NOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!
He looked around, seeing other cages like his, and other gargoyles.
ELISA: (Gargoyle) Yo, how ya doin'?
KINGCOBRA: (another Gargoyle) Whassuppppp?!
DEMONA: (3rd Gargoyle) How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Suddenly, the truck bounced,
FOX: 'Cause they had just run over Rush Limbaugh.
and he was thrown against the side of his cage, receiving an electric shock. He snarled, and jumped back, rubbing his shoulder.
Someone moved in another cage, attracting his attention.
"It hurts, doesn't it?" a feminine voice asked.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) No, it tickles.
He looked closer, and saw a female gargoyle about his age sitting across from him in another cage. She was a blood red in color, like himself, but had ebony black hair that flowed down her back. She was beautiful, but her beauty was marred by the scars on her body from ring fights. She looked at him with piercing blue eyes, and curled her lip in a half smile.
ELISA: (Female) Whoops, I thought you were Oberon, my lover. My bad.
Necromancer curled his lip in return, being friendly. Then he nodded. " Yes. It does." His answer was short, and sounded crisp,
KINGCOBRA: While my voice just sounds crispy.
LEX: How the hell does that happen?
KINGCOBRA: Ask me that before my morning orange juice, and you'll know.
but that was the way they all talked; it came almost naturally now.
The female nodded too. " So, you're Necromancer. The master's new....'pet'." Necromancer snarled.
"I am no one's pet!" he snarled at her. She only chuckled.
FOX: (Female) Hee hee!
"Oh, yes you are. We all are, though none of us like it much.
KINGCOBRA: (Female) It's torture when Blake snaps a leash around our necks for our morning walks.
We don't have much of a choice" She shook her head. "This will be your first fight in the ring.
KINGCOBRA: I thought Brooklyn already had his first fight in the ring when he fought Black Death.
LEX: No, that was just practice.
BROOKLYN: You mean to tell me I killed Black Death for nothing!?
KINGCOBRA: It wasn't for nothing. You did gain some fighting experience and learned a few new moves.
BROOKLYN: Well, yeah.
You must be ready. The opponents you faced in the gym are nothing compared to what you will face in the ring."
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Behold your first real opponent, Necromancer! He is such a terrifying and lethal force that anyone who fights him gets taken out in a stretcher! Say hello to... Bozo!!
Necromancer nodded. " So I am told," he answered. "Is it true that anything is allowed in the ring?" She nodded.
DEMONA: (Female) Anything, that is, except for attacks below the belt.
BROOKLYN: (Himself) Great. Take all the fun out of it, why don't ya?
"Yes," she said. " Any dirty trick you can think of is allowed in the ring. And I have many dirty tricks" She smiled maliciously. " Do you have any dirty tricks?"
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Well, I do have one trick... got yer nose!!
(ALL SNICKER.)
Necromancer smirked. " Oh, yes. I have many of those." He paused. " I don't believe we have been introduced. At least, you have not introduced yourself."
BROOKLYN: (lewdly) Come with me into my room. I'll 'introduce' myself to you in there.
She grinned. " I am Shania." Necromancer snorted.
"What kind of a ring name is that?" he asked. " It sounds rather pathetic to me."
She frowned. " I was named after a singer he hates. It amused him. And me. I do not like that singer either."
KINGCOBRA: And neither does Pestilence.
LEX: How about you?
KINGCOBRA: I don't really care about Miss Twain one way or the other.
"Shania Twain?" Necromancer asked, a humorous smile crossed his lips. " I do not like her either." The two shared a grin. Then they stopped.
ANGELA: (Shania) Don't tell me. You had Chalupas for lunch, right?
"So why do you not pick a fight with me?" Necromancer asked.
"Because we are to be
KINGCOBRA: Lawyers.
(ALL SCREAM.)
partners in the paired ring fights," she said. " And partners should not fight each other. Besides, we have the same master, and must work together in our training." Necromancer nodded in comprehension.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) I'll just keep nodding, like I'm actually paying attention.
"I see," he said. Suddenly, they were interrupted by another voice.
BROOKLYN: The voice of talented Keith David, ladies and gentlemen!
"So, you are our new companion," said a male gargoyle from the cage behind Necromancer.
KINGCOBRA: Guess not.
GOLIATH: Keith David?
KINGCOBRA: You know, the guy from movies such as �They Live�, �Armageddon�, �There�s Something About Mary�, �Dead Presidents��.
GOLIATH: Yes, I get your point.
KINGCOBRA: He was also the voice of Spawn in the cartoon. Come to think of it, he sounds a lot like you�
GOLIATH: Enough!
The two gargoyles turned to see a young blue male
LEX: Hi. Did anybody ever tell you that you look like a drowning victim?
gargoyle with red hair in the cage behind Necromancer, who was watching them. He was wearing an all black leather
KINGCOBRA: (Beavis & Butthead) Heh. Heh heh heh heh heh. Leather. Heh heh heh.
outfit with two silver shoulder guards. His hair was also tied back with
ANGELA: An Elephant.
LEX: The Titanic.
KINGCOBRA: Broadway.
(BROADWAY SHOOTS HIM A WARNING.)
KINGCOBRA: (just as threateningly) Don't look at me like that...
a black hair tie.
HUDSON: (Gargoyle) Aye, can one of you kindly remove this hair tie? It be pulling the flesh off me face. Och!
KINGCOBRA: Talk about facelifts.
(ALL LAUGH.)
"It appears that all of you seem to know who I am, though I have never met any of you." Necromancer said, scowling in annoyance. " Who are you?"
LEX: We formerly worked with King Arthur, and Griff.
BROOKLYN: Yeah, we're the 'Gargs Of The Round Table'.
"I am called God's Sin,
KINGCOBRA: The Pope would raise his eyebrow if he read this, with character names like that.
and I am the second pet of the masters�, �God�s Sin replied. Necromancer raised an eye ridge.
" The second pet?" he asked. The blue gargoyle nodded.
LEX: Yes, the second pet. Clean the peanut butter outta your ears.
"Yes. Shania was the first to be trained by the master.
KINGCOBRA: Heh. I bet she was.
ANGELA: You're a pervert.
(KINGCOBRA TRIES TO LOOK INNOCENT.)
KINGCOBRA: Moi?! What did I do???
You are lucky to be her partner in the ring." He paused, smiling, a wicked glint in his eye. "Shania does not like many of the master's new recruits. I believe she has taken a fancy to you."
BROOKLYN: Can it be? Could I possibly FINALLY have a mate??!?
Shania snarled, her eyes glowing ruby. " If I ever get to spar with you, boy, I will
KINGCOBRA: Seduce you heavily.
BROOKLYN: You need a clean mind.
KINGCOBRA: Hey, when you spend most of your alone, and you have HBO, it tends to rub off.
kill you!" she roared at God's Sin. He chuckled.
"Come now, Shania," he said, his voice dripping. "You have not been so kind to the others. I think this one has appealed to you.
DEMONA: (Shania) I love Green hair.
I can see why he would, though."
Necromancer growled. " I will not have you speaking in such a manner to me, young warrior,"
BROADWAY: (God's Sin) Okay, how about I speak to you like this, ya bastard? Ha ha ha ha. You suck.
he said, his voice the hiss of a snake.
KINGCOBRA: Sssssssssssssssssssss.... sorry, my 'S' key got stuck.
"It will be your downfall if you continue with your words. I will make sure of it." Suddenly, another voice intervened.
"Ignore the young upstart," a female gargoyle said from the cage beside God's Sin. " He is just trying to get you both riled up for the ring fights tomorrow evening." Necromancer turned and looked at her. She was jade green female gargoyle with jet black hair and black eyes. On closer inspection, Necromancer saw that she was nursing a hatchling.
ANGELA: (Mother) I have an announcement for you, newcomer. Say hello to your child!!!
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Say whaaa??!!
His eyes widened. She nodded.
"Yes, this is our child,"
BROOKLYN: It's a good thing I'm not a human. Child Support would be a bitch for me to pay.
she said, smiling lovingly at God's Sin. She held the blue skinned red haired male hatchling up for him to see.
KINGCOBRA: Then she promptly dropped him.
The baby gurgled and waved his small fist at him.
LEX: (Baby) Goo goo! I'm gonna kick your stoney ass when we're older, Daddy! Goo Goo!
Necromancer smiled softly. Then he stopped.
"Do you fight?"
FOX: (Female) Yes, and I carry my baby in my left arm while I attack with my right. Nothing wrong with that.
he asked. He wasn't sure what to think.
BROOKLYN: (himself) I wonder if Blake found his oven on yet?
To force a mother to fight in the ring while she had a hatchling to take care of was the cruelest thing he could imagine Blake would do.
KINGCOBRA: Yeah, but dangling a baby off a balcony dangerously would be a close second.
BROOKLYN: Damn Michael Jackson.
His fears were groundless, though.
"Gods, no!" she said, surprised. " That is the one good thing about Blake. He will not make me fight until the baby is old enough to learn himself.
DEMONA: (Blake) The baby is now a year old. Time to start training him.
Then, he will learn."
"What is his name?"
LEX: Hannibal Lecter.
KINGCOBRA: Prince Charles.
BROOKLYN: Nemo.
KINGCOBRA: As in the fish from that Disney movie?
BROOKLYN: as in the Emperor.
KINGCOBRA: Ah.
Necromancer asked, suddenly interested. The female smiled.
"His name is Gaijin, which means 'barbarian',"
GOLIATH: Conan's long lost brother who was carried off by rabid Dingos.
she said. The she laughed. " Silly me! I forgot to introduce myself! My name is Forest Wolf." Necromancer chuckled.
KINGCOBRA: Forest Wolf wasted no time baying at the moon.
"These are some of the strangest names I have ever heard," he said, shaking his head.
BROADWAY: How's this for a strange name? Kendralonniemichaeljonesoreillysmithroeperson...
(BROADWAY'S HEAD EXPLODES FROM SAYING ALL THAT.)
ALL: YAY!!!
"Though mine is not much better." he concluded.
The other gargoyles nodded. " Blake picks the names he believes will suit us in the ring," Forest Wolf said. "Strangely, the names suit to us, and we discard our old names for the new."
Shania sighed, then nodded. "Sometimes I believe that with our new names, a new gargoyle has been born. We are not who we used to be, and never will again. I feel that though it is not right what has happened to us, in a way it has been a well learned lesson that we needed." The other gargoyles stared at her angrily.
KINGCOBRA: (God's Sin) You ran over my foot!
LEX: (Necromacer) You let one!
BROOKLYN: You dyed my hair orange!
"What do you mean, 'a lesson that we needed'?!" God's Sin roared in rage. " We did not need or deserve this treatment!"
Forest Wolf snarled. "We did not ask for this! How could you say it is a good thing?!"
DEMONA: (Shania) Very easily. I got bored and wished to have some excitement.
she growled. Necromancer thought quickly, realizing what Shania was trying to say.
BROOKLYN: I realized that Shania was trying to weasel her way into asking one of us for a Kit Kat.
"I think that what our companion is trying to tell us is that we have been chosen by a higher power to live through this,"
KINGCOBRA: Nah, not really. Actually, Oberon is just laughing his head off at them.
he said. "I doubt that any of us knew this sort of sport existed before we were captured, right?" They nodded. " Now that we do, we have surpassed the fighting skill of every gargoyle we know. That means, that we have the ability to destroy them, and any other, that stands in our way."
ALL: (singing) Go, Go Power Rangers!
"But still we must follow the orders of a human?!" God's Sin asked indignantly.
Necromancer smiled a cruel smile. " Not for long. When we are ready, we will break free, and make him, and everyone else who betrayed us, pay."
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) MUWAhahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!
God's Sin, Forest Wolf, and Shania all nodded, they're eyes glowing slightly, lips curled back from their teeth in snarls.
Necromancer smiled, already planning ways of killing his clan.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Hmmm... I could split Lex's head open with a pick-axe, shove food down Broadway's throat until he chokes, lop Angela in two with a chainsaw, introduce Goliath to 'Mr. Pitchfork', and decapitate Hudson with a machete.
LEX: You really do have a sick mind.
KINGCOBRA: Nah, just a graphically vivid imagination. Don't worry, though, I'd never really do any of that stuff. I like people more nowadays.
(ALL SIGH IN RELIEF.)
****************
Two Years Later
BROOKLYN: I discovered my true calling: as an AT&T salesman.
KINGCOBRA: (Carrot Top) Just dial down the middle with 1-800-C-A-L-L-A-T-T!
A loud roaring was coming from the other side of the door, cheering humans and snarling gargoyles.
LEX: The roaring was actually caused by a PMSing Demona.
ALL: Aaahhh!!!
(DEMONA SHOOTS AT LEX WITH HER LASER CANNON, MISSING INTENTIONALLY.)
Necromancer paced in his cage; he knew that he was the next in the ring. Shania was in there now, fighting to kill.
DEMONA: And losing badly.
He heard her screams of rage, and howls of pain from her opponent.
BROOKLYN: (Opponent) Owwwww!!!! MOMMY!
He smiled grimly. Already he was starting to like her more and more.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Look at her ripping out her opponent�s throat while all covered in blood. *SIGH* I think I�m in love.
He liked her attitude, her fierceness.
BROOKLYN: In other words, I�m in love with a total shrew.
He also liked how she looked. She really was beautiful, and he thought he was starting to fall in love with her.
KINGCOBRA: Until he made the mistake of mating with her for life, and realized very quickly just how wrong he had been.
It had been nearly two years since he had met her, and they had fought many a battle together. They trained together, and sometimes they fought in the ring against two opponents.
ELISA: Double Trouble.
FOX: Double the fun.
(ALL SING DOUBLEMINT GUM JINGLE.)
They always won. He didn't know how she felt about him,
ANGELA: (Shania) Necromancer, once our partnering days are done, how you�d like to go on a little trip� to the wood chipper�?
but she was always kind to him. Well, as kind as she could be, considering they lived lives of hell.
KINGCOBRA: Where Satan chased them all over with that pitchfork of his.
He thought back to the night he first met her, when they talked about how they could get revenge on their clans and Blake.
BROOKLYN: (Necromancer) Screw killing my clan. When we get out of here, let�s hit Vegas, baby!
Suddenly, the noise stopped.
KINGCOBRA: His ears had inexplicably popped that very second.
He listened carefully, and then the door flung open,
LEX: Right into the person who was standing next to it.
and Blake, followed by Shania, walked in. Necromancer smiled. She obviously won. She had some wounds on her, but nothing serious.
FOX: (Shania) Yeah, her opponent had ripped her heart out, but aside from that, nothing serious�
As she passed, she threw him a winning grin, showing all her teeth. He saluted her,
KINGCOBRA: Go America. Go Broncos.
then stepped toward the front of the cage, waiting for Blake to let him out.
Blake unlocked the cage door, and Necromancer stepped out. He looked at Blake, who grinned evilly at him. "Now it is time for you to fight, Necromancer," he said. "Kick some ass."
GOLIATH: (Blake) And then I�ll pound that ass.
Necromancer nodded, and the two walked toward the door of the ring. As he passed them, Forest Wolf and God's Sin gave him a thumbs up sign.
KINGCOBRA: (Forest Wolf) Lots of luck to ya, Nec.
ELISA: (God�s Sin) Have fun getting horribly and brutally massacred.
He heard Shania laugh. Then, he stepped out of the door, and into the ring.
LEX: Getting stuck in the ropes.
"All right people, it's time for what you've been waiting for!"
BROOKLYN: Let�s get-t-t-t ready to r-r-r-r-rumble-e-e-e-e!!!!
the announcer said, loudly.
"Blake is introducing his newest recruit to the terror of Europe, a black she-demon who turns the blood of all gargoyles cold.
KINGCOBRA: Thus explaining why Demona�s �cold-hearted�.
LEX: That was lame.
KINGCOBRA: Remember what I said about my parents� sense of humor?
Though he has won every fight he's fought, this gargoyle, the color of blood, will face his greatest challenge yet!
LEX: A Mexican Wrestler.
KINGCOBRA: (fake Mexican accent) I am Senor� Bag Of Crap!!
This night, it's Necromancer versus Cold War!!!"
ANGELA: Cold Sore?
KINGCOBRA: No. Cold WAR.
ANGELA: Oh.
Cheering blocked out any other sound Necromancer might of heard, but if he could, he would have heard Shania's terrified cry.
ELISA: (Shania) Aahhh!! Fire ants are attacking me!
**************************************
Lexington stared at his rookery brother with a look of utter horror on his face.
LEX: There�s a demon standing behind you, Brooklyn! Oh, wait, that�s just the mirror behind you�
He couldn't believe what Brooklyn was telling them.
KINGCOBRA: (Lex) I don�t care if you�ve got dandruff!
He listened, his hands turning cold and eyes widening at every gory detail he heard.
Necromancer continued to talk. "Cold War was the best of all the ring fighters in that age group. She never lost a battle. She was the toughest opponent I ever had. That night, I thought I was going to die.
DEMONA: And did. The End.
Cold War knew every trick there was, and more than I did. Except one.
GOLIATH: He tried strangling her with a long roll of unused toilet paper.
She nearly killed me, but it seemed that luck was on my side for once....."
**************************************
Necromancer screamed as Cold War rammed into his broken ribs with all the force she could.
KINGCOBRA: Brooklyn�s strength here could be compared to that of a scorpion attacking an army tank.
He was thrown into the wall of the ring, and with a loud crunch, he felt his wing snap. He slumped to the ground, groaning. His eyes flared white, and his teeth showed, stained with blood.
LEX: He�d spent the previous night draining Angela of all her precious blood.
ANGELA: Do you want me to bitch-slap you?
LEX: (silent)
He shook his head, clearing it.
FOX: That should be easy to do, considering the size of his gray matter.
(BROOKLYN GROWLS AT HER.)
He looked around for his enemy, and saw her charging him again.
(KINGCOBRA MIMICS WAVING A RED CAPE.)
KINGCOBRA: Si, El Toro. Ole�!
Necromancer swallowed blood, and leaped out of the way of the charging female. She slammed into the wall, where he had been just an instant before. She hissed. Necromancer growled.
~ Jesus, what do I do? She's unstoppable!~ he thought as he leaped out of the way from another attack. ~ Time to go on the offensive~
BROOKLYN: I'm at the 30! The 20! The 10!
KINGCOBRA: Hike!
He concluded as he leaped for her. She turned and jumped out of the way in time. He was ready for that though. With a swipe of his tail, he tripped her up,
BROOKLYN: (himself) Oops, sorry. My tail has a mind of its' own sometimes.
and she hit the ground. With a roar that shook the windows,
ELISA: Then breaking them, resulting in seven years of bad luck.
he leaped on top of her, pinning her down. She shrieked, and with a mighty shove, threw him off of her.
ANGELA: (emanates Xena's battle cry)
She swiped at his face with her talons, and he felt his flesh split. He roared and punched her in the gut, making her fall
KINGCOBRA: Onto her head. Brooklyn wins!
back. Then, he dropped to all fours and charged.
BROOKLYN: The Visa Card: Never leave home without it.
She got to her feet and barely got out of the way in time. With a sharp movement, Cold War leaped into the air and twisted herself like a cat,
KINGCOBRA: (makes angry cat noises)
coming down on his back. She laughed hysterically as she wrapped her talons around his throat,
FOX: (Cold War) Hi! Strangulation's a fun hobby! Don't you agree?!
and began to slice through the thick muscles of his neck. Blood began seeping down between her fingers. She began to dig in
KINGCOBRA: In other words, she began eating him.
harder, and Necromancer found it nearly impossible to breathe. He choked, and tried to dislodge her from his back, but she was too strong, and wouldn't let go. He let out a voiceless snarl, and, with everything he had, he threw himself backwards into the wall.
ALL: Ow.
He dimly heard her scream in pain as her wings broke, and her ribs as well. He continued to slam her into the wall, feeling a surge of energy every time she screamed.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Wham! Slam! Thank ya, ma'am!
Finally, he turned, and found her slumped against the wall, panting and holding her ribs.
BROADWAY: Mmmm... RIBS!!!
KINGCOBRA: Shit! You're still alive?!
BROADWAY: Yeah, and thank you for the nap. It did me wonders.
KINGCOBRA: Shit!
With a snarl of hate, he thought of all the pain she had caused him that night, and how if she won this fight, Blake would really let him have it.
ANGELA: (Blake) Here you go. Merry Christmas.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Thanks, Blake! What a nice gift! I�ve always wanted a� a pack of angry Dobermans!?? AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
LEX: (Dobermans) Burp.
If he lived.
LEX: He would take that vacation to Ottawa.
~ I will not lose,~ he thought. Suddenly, he smiled. ~I know how to kill her,~
KINGCOBRA: Stabbing her?
LEX: Shooting her?
DEMONA: Clawing her eyes out?
BROOKLYN: Sending Broadway over to belch in her face?
BROADWAY: Hey, now!
(BROOKLYN SNICKERS.)
he thought with a hiss. He opened his mouth, and let loose a roar that shattered the windows
DEMONA: Cutting everyone in the room, Necromancer and Cold War included, into ribbons.
and nearly made Blake wet his pants. Necromancer opened his jaws as far as they could go,
KINGCOBRA: While wrapping his snake-like body around her, squeezing tightly.
then charged Cold War, blood and saliva dripping from his fangs. With a snapping movement, Necromancer went low to the ground, and, right when he was in front of her, he leaped for her throat.
BROOKLYN: Gotcha!
His jaws closed about her neck with a meaty thump and he bit down with everything he had.
HUDSON: (Brooklyn) Mmmm... Beefy.
He yanked her away from the wall and started tossing her about, never letting go of her throat.
KINGCOBRA: Brooklyn might have, in other circumstances, thought Cold War was a doll, but this is ridiculous.
He twisted his body and flung her about as if she were a toy. Her muffled screams were drowned out by the crowd's hollering.
ALL: (Crowd) JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
Necromancer ignored the yelling and continued his assault on Cold War. He shook his head roughly, and more blood squirted out of her throat. Her struggles weakened, and soon became non-existent. Finally, after a few minutes of making sure she was dead, Necromancer
KINGCOBRA: Swallowed her whole.
LEX: Buried her body.
DEMONA: Left it there for the flies to enjoy.
BROADWAY: Made love to it.
ALL: EEEWWWWW!!!!!
let go of her throat. Cold War's dead corpse slumped to the ground.
ALL: Thud.
KINGCOBRA: That was a 9.5 on the Richter scale.
Necromancer looked up, and roared. He curled his lip at the humans who stood, now silent, watching him.
LEX: (Brooklyn) I AM NECROMACER! HEAR ME ROAR!!
He smiled a nasty smile, and stood up. He walked over to where Blake was standing, watching him. The look on Blake's face made Necromancer's malicious grin growwider. Blake looked utterly shocked.
DEMONA: His TV fell into his tub while he was bathing.
Necromancer strode up to him, and looked him in the eye. " It seems I have learned a new trick, Blake," he hissed. " One that you did not teach me."
BROOKLYN: You can't teach an angry red-skinned gargoyle new tricks.
He turned around as cheering erupted in the room, swelling until he could not hear himself think.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Now, let me see... what was I thinking? Would all of you stop cheering for a second?! Thank you. Now I was thinking... GAH!
Necromancer turned and followed Blake back into the waiting room where
LEX: The Quarrymen awaited.
Shania, Forest Wolf, and God's Sin stood watching the door. Bright smiles and cheers of welcome greeted him as he was locked in his cage. He looked at Shania, who smiled secretly at him.
DEMONA: (Shania) Hi! You get to be my mate for life!
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn, unenthused grumbling)
�It seems that I had underestimated you," she purred. "I am very pleased with your win, Necromancer. Very pleased." Necromancer smiled.
"As am I," he said, his voice as cool as silk. They smiled.
LEX: Before they both pulled out handguns from thin air and blew each other away.
The next night, they became mates.
*******************************************
Necromancer took a drink of water,
KINGCOBRA: Which he quickly discovered had come from Mexico.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Ahhhh!! It burns! IT BURNS!!
and looked around the room at his clan. He shook his head, and smiled softly. He wasn't going to say the next part, about when he and Shania made love for the first time,
(KINGCOBRA STARTS GRINNING.)
KINGCOBRA: All right! Finally, some cool Hentai!
but he was going to remember it anyway. He had to think for a moment before he started to tell the story again, and those few minutes gave him enough time to remember.
LEX: He remembered the time Broadway had accidentally set him on fire in the kitchen.
********************************************
Necromancer awoke with a roar. He shook the stone fragments from his body, then checked himself, seeing if he had any new scars. He did.
Necromancer sighed. ~ By the time I'm seventy I'm going to be one great big scar,~
BROADWAY: Brooklyn as a 70-year old. There�s a scary image.
KINGCOBRA: Yeah, but picturing YOU as a elderly gargoyle is even more unsettling.
he thought.
Suddenly, he looked up. He was not in the same place he had been last night.
ELISA: He had been in Cambodia.
He was in a large empty room with no windows. He snorted. A sudden sound from behind
FOX: Caused him to pass out from the foul stench of it.
attracted his attention. He turned around and saw Shania standing behind him.
ANGELA: (Shania) Oops, sorry. I was looking for the women�s locker room.
He smiled. He knew that she loved him, she told him so the night before, after he had
DEMONA: Gotten drunk and jumped out the window.
killed Cold War. Now, he wondered what she wanted.
KINGCOBRA: (Shania) I want some good lovin�, baby!
He looked closer at her, and then, with sudden realization, knew. His breath quickened.
She smiled, and nodded, walking toward him. "Hello, my love," she purred.
"Greetings, dear," he replied.
ALL: (Necromancer) Greetings, Bambi.
She came to within a few inches of him, her breath warm against his throat.
"You know what I
KINGCOBRA: Did Last Summer.
want," she whispered. Necromancer cupped her chin in his hand, and looked her in the eyes.
"What we both want," he purred. "Yes."
She pressed her head up under his throat, a low rumble sounding in hers.
ELISA: (Shania) Hey, you know what they say happens with pop rocks and soda? It�s true!
She took his hand in hers, and with the other drew one talon down his chest.
LEX: For the rest of his life, Necromancer had a tattoo in the shape of a talon on his chest.
He folded his wings around her, and held her waist with his arm.
They began to kiss, passionately. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed herself against him.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Mph! I� I can�t breathe!
He moved back, still holding her, and leaned against the wall. He ran his hands down her sides, still kissing her.
With one hand, she began to undo his belt,
(KINGCOBRA GRINS.)
while he ran his hand up her thigh, and her skirt. She purred when he began to stroke her, moving her hips against him as she worked on removing his pants. They dropped, and then she went for the shoulder guards.
BROOKLYN: �Cause she wanted to kill their king.
With an almost practiced move, Necromancer removed her skirt,
FOX: He practices the art of �skirt-removal� on the Mannequins at Macy�s.
and started undoing the strings on her shirt. She jerked her hips against him, obviously telling him to hurry up.
KINGCOBRA: What�s the big rush?! I can understand why SHE�S in a hurry, but I want this to last a while!
ANGELA: (sighs) Men.
KINGCOBRA: (Defensive) What!?
He turned her around so she was pressed against the wall, and began to kiss her all over her body. His lips touched her throat, then
KINGCOBRA: Got stuck there. As the two struggled to pry his lips off, Brooklyn realized too late why getting stoned and licking super glue is never a good idea.
moved down to her breasts.
She moaned as he began to nibble on them,
BROOKLYN: If that was Broadway there doing that, he�d be looking for the candy bars hidden there.
and arched her back. He felt himself growing hard, but continued to please her, knowing that he would soon get what he wanted.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Yeah! Gimme nookie, baby!
He kept moving down her body, until he reached the crevice between her legs.
HUDSON: They be the size of all of Europe.
She gasped, and cried out in pleasure as his tongue began long, deep strokes inside her.
BROOKLYN: Damn, but where did this inexplicable long-ass tongue come from?!
KINGCOBRA: The aftermath of a nearby nuclear factory?
She began to rotate her hips, and he began to go deeper. She felt herself begin to climax.
HUDSON: Ay? She felt himself begin to Cinemax?
KINGCOBRA: No. CLIMAX.
HUDSON: Aye.
KINGCOBRA: (beneath his breath) TV Junkie.
LEX: Hey, you�re a TV junkie, too!
KINGCOBRA: Not that bad.
She grabbed his horns
(MASSIVE SOUNDS OF THROAT CLEARING)
in her hands and tried to thrust him deeper, gasping.
ANGELA: (Shania) Oh, Jimmy! Jimmy!! Aaahhhhh!!!
BROOKLYN: (Himself) Say what?!
ANGELA: (Shania) I mean� Brooklyn! Brooklyn!
Necromancer ran his hands up her body and massaged her breasts. She grabbed his wrists, and pulled him up so they were face to face. Then she grabbed his hips and pulled him toward her, panting.
Finally, Necromancer felt that it was time.
KINGCOBRA: (Rafiki-like) It is time.
He pulled her close to him, and she wrapped her legs around his waist.
BROOKLYN: Aahhh!! She�s crushing my waist!
With a gentle thrust, he entered her. He let her writhe and snarl, having just broken her
KINGCOBRA: Vase.
ELISA: Window.
DEMONA: Neck.
virginity. When she calmed, he pushed against her gently and they both moaned in pleasure as they sank to the floor of the room, with him still inside of her.
Together, they began to move rhythmically, each thrust bringing more pleasure.
KINGCOBRA: So much pleasure that neither of them noticed the herd of Buffalo stampeding through the middle of the room right next to them.
Necromancer moaned, sweat dripping off of his body. He arched his back, chest heaving, and thrust again. He felt her hips push against his, sending them both into waves
LEX: (Surfer�s Voice) DUDE! Like, let�s ride the waves!
of pleasure. He grunted, and they increased their speed. She stroked his shoulders, slowly moving her hips, and moaning. She threw her head back and grabbed his hips, pressing them closer together.
KINGCOBRA: (grinning non-stop) God, I love stuff like this.
ANGELA: You would.
KINGCOBRA: I�m a young man with a dirty, mostly one-track mind. Of course I would.
Necromancer slid his hands down her arms, and they clasped hands. She pushed him over so that she was above him. She ran her hands down his arms, then his chest, pushing herself up to a sitting position. Necromancer groaned as he felt himself go deeper
BROOKLYN: Jesus Christ. How deep can I possibly get?
LEX: Deep enough to poke her lungs?
into her, then pull out, then back in.
KINGCOBRA: (singing) Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out�
(ANGELA PLANTS HER HAND OVER HIS MOUTH TO SHUT HIM UP.)
She moaned and swirled her hips in a circular motion. He grabbed her hips and ran his hands up her sides, to her breasts.
He cupped them, and then began to massage them. He was sweating, and so was she, which made their love-making more intense. Necromancer began moving his hips up, going deeper into her.
She gasped,
GOLIATH: Her biological father had just stumbled upon them.
FOX: (Shania) Oh, hi, Daddy! This isn�t what it looks like! He�s actually� uh�
and looked down at him with her ice blue eyes. She purred, and he growled in pleasure.
They moved faster, and began to climax. His thrusts became more frantic, and she dug her talons into his shoulders.
BROOKLYN: Ow!
She threw back her head, her ebony black hair falling down her sweaty back. Drops of sweat fell from her face, and coated her body. She kept her head back, and arched her spine more, grinding her hips against his. He kept his hands on her hips, thrusting as hard as he could. He grunted, and his chest heaved. He gasped, and moved faster, and jerked harder. His lips pulled back from his teeth in a grimace, and he yanked her against him harder. His breath came in hotly in his throat. With a hard lunge, he pushed into her harder than ever. She cried out in ecstasy, and he hissed.
Necromancer suddenly threw back his head, and stiffened.
KINGCOBRA: He turned into a ceramic lawn gnome.
He shot
DEMONA: Her between the eyes. The End.
into her, and came with an intensity he could never imagine, crying out. He felt Shania tense, and at the same time, they both orgasm, waves of pleasure rocking them. They screamed at the same time, both relishing in the intensity of their love-making.
Necromancer felt himself calm down, and with a few last thrusts of his hips, he felt Shania relax as well. Necromancer wrapped his arms around her, and she snuggled into his embrace. She looked at him and smiled a sleepy smile. Necromancer smiled back, not saying anything. Neither of them did for the rest of the night, only continued making love.
KINGCOBRA: (still grinning) Nice. Niiice.
******************************************
Necromancer stopped thinking for a moment, and started talking again.
LEX: (Necromancer) So, after we became mates, we ran off to become Buddhist Monks.
"The night after I fought Cold War, Shania and I became mates. Then, we were made to go to Europe for about seven years.
KINGCOBRA: They wanted to meet the Queen Mum of England.
During that time, Shania laid our eggs....."
LEX: In the middle of a dangerously busy highway.
*******************************************
Nine Months After Necromancer's and Shania's Mating
BROOKLYN: Demona got drunk and tried to kill various humans with stinky cheese.
Necromancer paced outside the delivery room.
KINGCOBRA: While he paced, Necromancer pondered the importance of sumo wrestling.
He growled, eyes glowing. Forest Wolf and God's Sin stood aside, watching him. Forest Wolf shook her head, then came and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Do not worry,"
LEX: Be Happy.
ALL: (singing) Don�t worry� be happy� don�t worry, be happy�
she said. "Shania will be fine in there. She is stronger than she appears to be."
KINGCOBRA: Of course she�s strong. She�d have to be, to kiss Brooklyn and not say anything about getting poked by his beak.
Necromancer nodded.
"I know," he said. "But I'm worried about what Blake might do to our child."
GOLIATH: He is worried that Blake will make the child fight Inuyasha.
His eyes began to glow. "I don't care about the fucking collar, if he touches our egg then he's dead meat."
KINGCOBRA: (blinks) Egg? Meat? Damn, but, this fic is making me hungry. Shit.
Forest Wolf smiled a reassuring smile. "Blake will not
ELISA: Run for President in the 2004 election.
DEMONA: Get in a drunken barroom brawl.
BROOKLYN: Walk on his hands.
harm your child. He is many things, but a child killer he is not. He will want them to train and fight in the ring."
FOX: And he will want them to fetch his bunny slippers, in the evenings, when he is in his bathrobe, sitting in his Laz-y-boy, watching TV.
She glared,
ANGELA: (Forest Wolf) You just stepped on my feet.
then looked lovingly down at her young Gaijin. He looked back up at her, and smiled. "I know that Gaijin's training will begin soon."
KINGCOBRA: I get that Gaiijin needs to be trained soon, but I wonder why Blake is such a psychopath?
BROOKLYN: Who knows? Maybe he watched too many late night infomercials as a kid and got bored to the point of insanity.
Necromancer nodded. Suddenly, a scream of pain erupted from the delivery room.
KINGCOBRA: The Alien had burst out of Shania�s chest, bringing her, as well as this fic, to a grisly, cheaply unsatisfying end.
Necromancer snarled, and nearly jumped for the door, but was held back by God's Sin and Forest Wolf.
"What are you doing?!" he snarled. "I want to get to her now!" He struggled, but to no avail. The two gargoyles held him tight.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Gack� you�re cutting off my circulation�
"She's fine!" God's Sin said angrily. "She's just giving the egg one last push!" The red gargoyle hissed.
LEX: Just before Shania pushed too roughly and the egg went flying clear out into the delivery room, flying down Necromancer�s throat. Forest Wolf and God�s Sin only gawked in amazement as Necromancer began to flail his arms comically.
"You had better be right,"
KINGCOBRA: (Bob Barker) All of this can be yours if THE PRICE IS RIGHT!
he growled, eyes glowing like lamps. "If you are not right, I will make you pay." God's Sin stepped back. He swallowed.
FOX: (God�s Sin) Do you take Mastercard or Visa?
Suddenly, the door flung open, and Blake stepped out, a proud smile on his face. He walked up to Necromancer and clapped him on the back. Necromancer growled.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Ow! You just slapped me where Shania had dug her talons into me!
"Congratulations, asshole!" Blake said, grinning widely. " It's twins!" God's Sin and Forest Wolf stepped back in shock.
KINGCOBRA: Uh, why would Blake be there to begin with? He�s too big of an asshole to help either Brooklyn or Shania during the birth, and they�re too young to be trained.
"Twins?" Necromancer repeated, feeling dizzy. Blake nodded.
HUDSON: (Blake) They bear an uncanny resemblance to Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny Devito.
"You can go see your
BROOKLYN: Tax Collector.
LEX: Computer Programmer.
KINGCOBRA: Probation Officer.
wife now," he said. Necromancer nodded, and walked into the room. He saw his mate, and ran to her.
DEMONA: Tripping over the rug.
She was cradling two eggs in her arms, and she smiled as he came up to her. "It seems you have given me more than I expected," she purred.
KINGCOBRA: He had also bought her a SUV.
LEX: They�re gargoyles, so they have wings. Why would they need a SUV?
KINGCOBRA: Style, my dear friend. Class, and style.
Necromancer curled his lip.
LEX: (Necromancer) That�s the last time I ever eat Yams!
(KINGCOBRA TRIES NOT TO VOMIT AT THE MENTION OF YAMS.)
"They will be great fighters," he whispered. "They will be the best. I promise." She nodded, curling her lip in imitation of him.
BROOKLYN: Well, at least we know the truth now: One-Thirds of this fic is about lip-curling.
"Because we are the best," she hissed. "These children will be no less. They will be greater."
(KINGCOBRA STARTS HUMMING THE DRAGONBALL Z THEME.)
Necromancer nodded, and smiled. ~ Our children will be born into slavery,~ he thought bitterly. ~ When they are ready, they will have their revenge, and so will we~
The two mates locked eyes, then began to laugh evilly.
ALL: MWUAhahahahahahahahaha!!!
***************
March 23, 2014
Eleven Years After Shania Laid Her Eggs
KINGCOBRA: The Batmobile lost a wheel, and The Joker got away.
The two red hatchlings slept soundly by the side of their father.
LEX: (Twins) ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz�..
Necromancer looked proudly down on his twins. One male, and one female, both
BROOKLYN: Literally attached at the waist.
KINGCOBRA: That ain�t funny, man. Show some mercy to the Conjoined.
the same blood red color as he and his mate. His daughter had the same mane of moonlight colored hair and green eyes that he did,
FOX: And the same Green-colored hair.
(ALL SNICKER)
BROOKLYN: More then 15 years, and my hair STILL hasn�t returned to its� normal color?
KINGCOBRA: Maybe Blake gets wicked with the hair dye?
while his son had his mother's ebony black hair and blue eyes, including Necromancer's beak. His daughter snuggled against him, getting more comfortable on the stone floor.
DEMONA: Which then caved in beneath all of them. The End.
The two hatchlings were both curled up against his belly; he was lying on his side on the ground, using his wings as a blanket for his children. Shania sat in the corner, reading a book on witchcraft.
BROOKLYN: She wants to join the cast of �Charmed�.
The two of them were off duty for the moment, so to speak. Blake let them refrain from fighting while the hatchlings were young as they are.
~ Blake is at least good that way,~ Necromancer thought as he felt his son stir beside him. The little gargoyle yawned,
KINGCOBRA: Oh, shit! (STRUGGLES VAINLY TO HOLD IT OFF BEFORE HE YAWNS LOUDLY, THEN�) Damn you, brat!
and keened loudly, wanting to be fed. Shania turned to look, then smiled as she got to her feet and walked over to them.
ANGELA: Leaving a maimed sacrificial bird in the corner.
The hatchling reached up for his mother, recognizing her.
KINGCOBRA: (Crimson Blade) It�s my abusive mommy!
"How's my Crimson Blade?" Shania cooed to him, as she began to nurse him. Necromancer shook his head and grinned.
LEX: He was thinking about the old Rabbi, Priest, and Nun in a Bar joke.
KINGCOBRA: Yeah, only he varied it into a angry female, a doofy hatchling, and a psycho human in a Bar thing.
~ What a strange name Blake gave them,~ he thought. ~ Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood. I can't believe we allowed it, and yet.....
BROOKLYN: Blake had too MUCH FUN with the electric collar until we both caved.
and yet it suits them.~ His daughter began to stir, and yawned loudly. She looked up into his forest green eyes with her own and smiled.
ANGELA: (Heart�s Blood) Hi, Daddy! Oof! Watch the beak, Daddy!
She reached up and grabbed a lock of his long
(THROAT CLEARING)
white hair and giggled.
FOX: (Heart�s Blood) Hee hee hee! Got your green hair!
Necromancer grinned, and held her closer. ~ This one will be a great fighter,~ he thought. He didn't think he had any favorites between the two, but he knew somewhow
LEX: �Somewhow�??!
KINGCOBRA: Just let it go, Lex. Let it go.
that his daughter would be the stronger of the two.
ANGELA: (Holding her nose) In more ways then one.
BROOKLYN: Hey, that�s my daughter you�re insulting!
He knew, one day, they would escape from Blake. His eyes narrowed, and his lip curled.
KINGCOBRA: Who wants to bet $100 that Necromancer will curl his lip again before the fic is over?
ALL: NO ONE!
KINGCOBRA: Goddamnit.
~ One day, we will all fight together,~ he thought. ~And we will win our freedom.~
LEX: I didn�t know Necromancer had morphed into Martin Luther King, Jr.
*******************
October 12, 2024
Eleven Years After The Eggs Hatched
BROOKLYN: We ate them. Sunny-side up.
"Come on, girl! You have to be quicker than that!"
KINGCOBRA: Heart�s Blood fought at a snail�s pace.
Necromancer called to his daughter. She let out a snarl, and charged him.
LEX: 3�2�1�
ALL: CHAAARGE!
Necromancer leaped out of the way, only to find her suddenly underneath him. She rolled onto her back and kicked him in the stomach.
BROOKLYN: (winces)
It didn't hurt that much; she had only put in a little effort, but had she kicked with all her might it would have disabled the strongest gargoyle. Necromancer smiled. Heart's Blood was doing really well. Her training was almost complete, and she had mastered every move he had learned, only faster.
HUDSON: The lass had trained with Vin Diesel on the side.
Blake had decided to let Necromancer and Shania train their young,
LEX: As opposed to torturing them himself.
mostly because they had perfected the techniques Blake taught them almost to the point of being better than him. Shania was on the other side of the gym, sparring with Crimson Blade.
FOX: (Shania) He-yah! Have at you!
KINGCOBRA: (Crimson Blade) Taste my sparring skills of hot death!
His son was doing almost as well, but Heart's Blood still topped him in every move. Except one.
ANGELA: The sleeper hold.
Necromancer smiled as he remembered the time Crimson Blade had come in from the ring, and Blake had had to beat him for using the move Necromancer had used against Cold War.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) That�s a bad hatchling! No borrowing any of your father�s fighting moves! Bad!
In the hatchling's ring, it was not a fight to the death scenario, but fight
ALL: (singing) For our right� to PAR-TY!
'till you drop from exhaustion. His children always won. They were not, however, spared from the wrath of Blake, who beat them constantly. He did that, he said, because they had to learn to accept pain, like Shania and Necromancer had.
LEX: While we have to accept of this fic.
KINGCOBRA: Give Pestilence some credit. She could�ve done worse. This fic isn�t bad.
The parents didn't have to like it, though. Necromancer shook the thought from his mind. He didn't want to think about it then.
BROOKLYN: I wanted to think about running for President.
KINGCOBRA: Hmmm� the first Gargoyle president� I see story possibilities�
He turned and stood up facing his daughter.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Okay, honey, let�s train� HEY! Wait a cotton picking minute! You�re not my daughter!!
LEX: Heart�s Blood bore a striking resemblance to Janet Reno, only Heart�s Blood is much sexier by comparison.
"It is time for a break,"
GOLIATH: Let us go out for beers.
he announced curtly. Shania and Crimson Blade walked over, and Heart's Blood stood in front of her father. Necromancer smiled creepily.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Heh heh heh. Remind me to stop by Michael Myers� house for our weekend shindig.
"I believe it is time we do some planning for the future,"
KINGCOBRA: What, they�re gonna save money for college or something?
he hissed. The eyes of his family widened in surprise, then narrowed. Small smiles touched their lips. They knew what he was going to say then.
ALL: (Family) Yes! We�re going to Disneyland!
"When will we get them, father?" Crimson Blade asked, his voice like gravel.
LEX: (Necromancer) When I feel like it.
"Soon, my son. Very soon."
******************************************
Necromancer paused again in his tale. He glanced around the room at his clan. Now he was going to tell them of their escape, and return to Manhattan. This was the hardest part.
ALL: (singing) Waiting is the hardest part�
"When Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood were thirty-two, we made our escape. That night, we killed Blake. We tortured him until he finally died, a slow and painful death...."
DEMONA: (Necromancer) Miserable human, you are guilty of the crime of torture. Your sentence will be to eat endless boxes of Twinkies until you explode.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) Nooooooooooooo�..!!!!!!
*******************************************
Necromancer smiled nastily as he kicked Blake in the guts. Blake cried out in pain.
KINGCOBRA: (Blake) OOOOOWWWwwwwww!!!!!!
"So, Blake, do you think you can control us with the collars?"
LEX: (Blake) Yeah, I do. Now stop beating me, and get your asses back to your rooms!
Necromancer asked. He grabbed Blake by the hair and
KINGCOBRA: Promptly discovered Blake�s shocking secret.
BROOKLYN: (himself, surprised) This is one ugly wig, Blake.
pulled him up so they were eye to eye. "The collars don't hurt us anymore, Blake. And now, we have the key to take the collars off." He leaned in close and curled his lip.
KINGCOBRA: (sighs) If you guys had taken the bet, I�d probably be rolling in dough by now.
"Now we can kill you, Blake. How do you like how that shit works?" Necromancer threw Blake across the room to where Shania, Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood stood, snarling.
They were all collarless. Blake lay on the ground, shivering in fear of his former 'pets'. Shania leaned down and picked him up, snarling in his face. She smiled in contempt.
DEMONA: (Shania) You�re on a one-way trip to the 7th layer of hell. Try not to have too much fun.
"You do understand that you are about to die?" she questioned evilly. Blake swallowed and nodded nervously. Shania turned and threw him to Crimson Blade and Heart's blood.
"Go ahead, children," she said. "Have fun with him." Necromancer watched with pride as his children advanced on Blake, eyes glowing. The last thing Necromancer saw of him was when he was cringing against the wall, and then his children obscured his view.
BROOKLYN: One would think that after everything Blake did to me and my family, that I would want to actually see him die.
KINGCOBRA: I know I would�ve, if I were in your shoes� er, Talons.
Blake screamed.
****************************************
"And that was the last of Blake," Necromancer said. He smiled to himself, remembering how elated he had been when he saw Blake's mutilated corpse lying in the corner. He shook off that memory and looked back at his clan.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Now that I revealed how gruesome Blake�s death was, who�s up for dessert?
�That same night we left the compound," he said. " We left God's Sin and Forest Wolf behind, because they had nothing to do with our cause.
ANGELA: (Forest Wolf) Hey! Come back here and help us get these collars off!
KINGCOBRA: (God�s Sin) Have fun in your travels, wherever you go and whatever you do! Be sure to send us a few postcards!
It took us a few months, because we were in Mexico, to get back to New York. But when we got here, everyone knew it. We made ourselves known by attacking the humans, though we didn't kill them. We just wanted to get Goliath's attention...."
BROOKLYN: Spray-painting the words �Goliath Sucks� in red spray-paint on Elisa�s balcony window would be a good way of getting his attention�
******************************************
Necromancer looked down into the alley, where two humans stood, kissing.
KINGCOBRA: (Man) Gimme some tongue, baby!
He snarled to himself, then looked back at his family.
"Remember," he said softly. "Don't hurt them too much.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Don�t hurt them too much, but maiming them is okay.
We just want the police's attention." They nodded, and with silent wings the four gargoyles swooped down and landed in the middle of the alley.
KINGCOBRA: Unfortunately, it was a bowling alley. And someone had just bowled.
FOX: Ste-rike!
The two humans looked up, and saw four large monsters come screaming out of the darkness, eyes glowing.
BROOKLYN: Stephen King was in town.
The couple screamed and turned to flee, but the two smallest gargoyles blocked their path. Necromancer landed behind them with Shania.
The humans looked at him in horror. Necromancer snarled. "You two should have gotten a room,"
GOLIATH: Aye, we would have, but the cost of hotel rooms are too atrocious.
he scolded, then swiped at the male human with his talons.
KINGCOBRA: Accidentally swiping his head off.
LEX: (Necromancer) Oops� Shit� uh, uh� RUN!!!
He hit him across the side of the head, knocking him down. The woman screamed, loud and shrill.
ELISA: (shrilly) EEEK!
Around them, people were coming to see what the commotion was about. Necromancer roared, and the people scattered, screaming. Shania reached out and grabbed the girl, who had turned to flee.
ANGELA: (Shania) Don�t run away. I just want to gut you!
She brought the human close to her face, and snarled. "Call for
BROOKLYN: A taxi.
DEMONA: A human priest.
LEX: A pizza.
KINGCOBRA: Dammit, Lex, you�re making me hungry!
LEX: Sorry.
help, human. Tell everyone you know that gargoyles attacked you for no reason." She sliced her claws across the girl's face, leaving bloody scratches.
(KINGCOBRA, FOR SOME ODD REASON, STARTS THINKING ABOUT THE CANMORES.)
The girl screamed. "Go and tell your police!" Shania screamed after her as the human ran. Heart's Blood tripped her on the way out of the alley, sending the human flying.
DEMONA: Headfirst into a brick wall, splattering her worthless brains upon the wall and the ground. The End.
(ALL START LOOKING NERVOUS.)
With a cry, the girl got to her feet and kept on running, screaming about gargoyles attacking her.
Necromancer smiled to himself, and looked at Shania. She smiled back, and they all shared the same grin as Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood joined them.
"The first stage of the plan has been set," Necromancer said. "The players have been cast,
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Let�s hope they give us an Emmy.
and the battle grounds chosen. Now all we must do is wait." He smiled, thinking of the trouble this would cause Goliath and his former clan.
He laughed.
******************
Three Nights Later
DEMONA: I killed Goliath and the rest of the clan, excluding Necromancer, and robbing him of his revenge.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Nooooooo!!! Demona, you BITCH!
Necromancer paced around on the rooftop, waiting. Shania wasn't back yet, and she should have been. Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood watched; they were worried too, he knew.
Necromancer snarled. ~ She should have been back by now!~ he thought worriedly. ~ All she was supposed to do was check the news!~
KINGCOBRA: Uh, in a large city of Gargoyle-fearing humans, where could Shania have possibly gone to see the news without being spotted?
Suddenly, Crimson Blade shouted.
BROOKLYN: (Cimson Blade) Damn pigeons!
"There she is, father!" he shouted, leaping to his feet. Necromancer spun around, and saw her. He smiled as she descended onto the rooftop. He walked toward her as she smiled.
"The plan is going perfectly," she said, her voice like cool silk. "The humans are all so afraid of us that most stay indoors.
KINGCOBRA: Actually, they all stayed indoors cause it was �Must-See-TV night�.
And as planned, Goliath's clan is getting blamed for it all." Necromancer smiled.
"Then all is well," he said, sitting down. Shania frowned.
ELISA: Shania) Uh, honey? You�re sitting on my feet.
"Not exactly," she replied. Necromancer looked up at her, a dark look on his face.
BROOKLYN: Did you say something just now?
"Is it....?" he prompted. She nodded.
KINGCOBRA: Yes. Tom Brokaw spotted me.
"Yes," she replied. "Goliath and his clan are out searching the city for us. I took so long because I was almost seen." Necromancer stood and took her hand in his.
BROOKLYN: (himself) At least they didn�t see you honey� why are your hands so cold?
ANGELA: (Shania) Sorry, I have a �stick my hands in a freezer� fetish.
"But you are safe," he said. " And had you been seen, I think you could have beaten them." Shania looked uncomfortable for a moment.
FOX: (Shania) Honey, do you know where I can find some Tampax? It�s that time again.
ALL: Eeewww!
"I could have beaten most of them," she said softly. "But Goliath, your former leader, is much more powerfully built than I thought.
KINGCOBRA: Due to his daily intake of Steroids.
Had I engaged in battle with all of them, I would surely have been beaten by him." Necromancer frowned.
He knew she was right, that's why they had to face the clan together. Only together could they beat
KINGCOBRA: Off.
ALL: Ed�
KINGCOBRA: Sorry.
the clan. Necromancer's face turned into a snarl.
"I understand what you are saying," he said softly. "And you are right. But when we finally do face them, it will be with all of us here. Are you all with me?" he asked them. Shania, Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood all nodded.
"I will always be with you, my love," Shania said, putting her arms around him.
"And we are with you father," Crimson Blade said forcefully.
"Of course, father," Heart's Blood said, her voice silky and low. "No matter what, we will always be with you."
BROOKLYN: They kept that promise until Goliath showed up, then suddenly they all ran for the hills.
Necromancer smiled, and drew his children into a hug.
KINGCOBRA: (Children) Oof� Ow� Daddy? Daddy, you�re crushing us�
"Tomorrow night, we will let ourselves be seen, briefly," he said. "The humans will see us for only a moment. On camera.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Hi, Rookery Mom!
That will give Goliath and the others something to think about."
GOLIATH: Yes. It will allow me to think about getting Lexington to install a hidden camera in Elisa�s shower.
LEX: No, I won�t.
ELISA: Don�t even go there, Big Guy.
GOLIATH: Drats.
Necromancer looked out over the city, and in the far distance, saw the flitting shapes of gargoyles against the sky.
~Soon you will feel our wrath, Goliath.~ he thought. ~Very soon.~
*******************
The Next Night
Necromancer stood on the edge of the building he and his family had slept on during the day, and looked out over the city, like he had done the night before.
KINGCOBRA: Hey, with all this attention Necromancer and his family brought onto themselves, you�d think the Quarrymen would�ve found and smashed them during the day.
LEX: How would they have found them?
KINGCOBRA: Well, they do have helicopters.
He knew that what he intended to do tonight would be risky, but to really grab Goliath's attention he had to do it.
BROOKLYN: We all mooned him.
Necromancer looked back at his family, and nodded. The four blood red gargoyles leaped off the building into the night sky.
DEMONA: Unfortunately, the wind ripped their wings into tatters and they all plummeted like rocks.
*******************
"There," Necromancer pointed to the streets below. They were in Times Square, and the streets below were filled with people.
HUDSON: Och! The Dick Clark �rocking New Year�s special� is on!
Necromancer smiled.
"This is the perfect place to stage our first appearance,"
FOX: And immediately get ourselves all shot in the meantime.
he said. "It is very populated, and the police will soon arrive." He looked at his family. "What do you think?"
KINGCOBRA: (Family) We think your plan sucks.
They nodded. "That sounds right, father," Heart's Blood purred. "This way, we probably won't have to stay there long." Necromancer nodded.
"That's right. Now, try not to kill anybody, all right?"
LEX: (Necromancer) Unless you see Barney. Then go ahead and waste him.
he grinned maniacally. Shania shook her head with a laugh.
"We'll try," she said. Necromancer grinned. Then all four of them leaped off the roof and into the streets below.
LEX: INTO the streets??!
KINGCOBRA: They all smashed into the concrete headfirst at the exact same time.
*********************************
Necromancer paused. Everyone was staring at him, as though they couldn't believe that he would attack innocent humans. He shook his head, and smiled grimly.
"We tried not to hurt anybody, we just threw around some cars and scared them pretty badly. At least, we did that until the police arrived...."
BROOKLYN: Then we slaughtered them all. The streets ran red with the blood of the NYPD.
ELISA: Except for me, right?
(BROOKLYN REFUSES TO COMMENT.)
**********************************
Necromancer growled, and dug his claws into a blue Toyota. Using all of his strength, he picked it up and hurled it across the street.
KINGCOBRA: Then he laughed maniacally at all the poor mimes that had been crushed beneath it.
People who weren't smart enough to run were gathered on the other side of the street, watching him.
LEX: (Travis Marshall) Hi, thank you for watching the WVRN news. Tonight's opening segment; "Monsters trashing the streets and the dumbasses who stand there watching with their thumbs up their asses."
He looked at them, eyes glowing and teeth bared, and snarled. Some of them backed away.
FOX: All the way to Canada.
He looked around to see Shania rip a fire hydrant out of the ground and throw it through a store window.
ELISA: She wants to learn how to be a firefighter.
KINGCOBRA: She just flung the hydrant through a window!
ELISA: Who says she's doing well at it?
KINGCOBRA: You've got a point there.
Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood were advancing on some humans, screaming and hissing. Suddenly, his ears picked up the sounds of police sirens.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Holy crap! It's the cops! SCATTER!
Necromancer turned and snarled something at Shania that no one could understand.
BROOKLYN: I snarled at her to stop fooling around and get to the dishwashing.
He meant it so the humans couldn't understand him, but Shania came over and the two started tearing apart a van.
KINGCOBRA: It was the Mystery Machine, and they were looking for the secluded bong in the back.
Two police squad cars suddenly hurled around the corner, blaring their sirens.
ALL: (singing) Bad Gargs, Bad Gargs, whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when they come for you? Bad Gargs...
Necromancer turned and snarled. The cars stopped and several more joined them. He turned and screamed for his children to come to him.
"Here! You two!" he shouted. They turned and came running,
KINGCOBRA: (Kids) *HUFF PUFF* *WHEZE*
the four of them now facing the police who had their guns drawn.
LEX: (Cops) Behold the deadly power of our lethal water guns!
(KINGCOBRA SNICKERS.)
One of them stepped forward.
"Freeze! Police!" he shouted. "Come out with your hands up!" Shania laughed.
"We are already out in the open," she said. "Why must we 'come out'?"
BROOKLYN: I could think of a good joke there, but some people would be offended. (Looks at Lex and KingCobra.)
Necromancer laughed. The policeman made a face.
KINGCOBRA: (policeman) Who had a fish sandwich for dinner?
Suddenly, a red Ford Fairlane came hurtling around the corner, and
BROOKLYN: Dinged with other police cars just enough to cause a massive vehicular explosion, causing a fatality with the numbers in the hundreds.
screeched to a halt with the other police vehicles. Necromancer narrowed his eyes.
~So, she still drives that old junk-heap.~
ELISA: Hey!
(EVERYONE ELSE SNICKERS.)
he thought. The car door opened and a dark-skinned female cop stepped out.
KINGCOBRA: Forgetting to look out for the opened manhole two feet in front of her. The End.
A red-haired white cop got out on the other side, and the two walked toward the other officers. They were much older than he remembered.
BROOKLYN: I've been gone for over Twenty-five years! Why wouldn't they be older?!
"Morgan! What's happening?"
KINGCOBRA: (Morgan) The New York Knicks have gone crazy and are rampaging the streets! Run. RUUUUN!
she asked another cop. Then Necromancer saw her turn and look right at him. He heard her gasp, and saw her put her hand over her mouth
ELISA: (herself) Brooklyn! You're so... demented looking!
as he knew she recognized him.
"Hello Elisa," he hissed, his eyes glowing bright white. "Long time no see, huh?" Elisa stared at him. He watched her put her hand up to stop the other cops from firing.
LEX: Unfprtunately, that goon at the very end managed to get off one shot at the last second, hitting Necromancer between the eyes.
"Hold your fire!" she said to them, then stepped out onto the....
KINGCOBRA: Titanic.
LEX: Conveyer Belt.
FOX: Droppings some dog had left on the sidewalk.
ALL: Eew!
battle ground, for lack of better words. Necromancer watched her walk toward him cautiously. She stopped ten feet away.
"Brooklyn?" she said. "Is it you?" Necromancer growled.
BROOKLYN: (himself) No, it's my evil alien clone!
"There is no 'Brooklyn' anymore, Elisa," he hissed. She stepped back, eyes widening.
"Because of you and Goliath, Brooklyn is dead." Suddenly, the other cop that had been in the car with her stepped out to stand by her side. It was Matt Bluestone.
"Brooklyn," he said. "Where have you been for the last twenty-five years?" Necromancer snarled.
BROOKLYN: Living in Iraq.
(ALL SCREAM.)
"Stop calling me Brooklyn!" he shouted, baring his teeth.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Do my pearly whites look pearly enough to you?
Shania flexed her talons and hissed. Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood snarled, taking a menacing step toward them.
Elisa and Matt stepped back in fear. Necromancer held up his hand, and his children stopped advancing. He looked back at Elisa and growled.
"Because of you and that pathetic former clan of mine, I've been in Hell!!!" Now he could feel all the rage he had kept pent up over the years start to come loose.
KINGCOBRA: That'd be scary.
"What!" Elisa said, her voice shocked. Matt looked confused, but scared. "What do you mean Brooklyn?"
BROOKLYN: (himself) What I mean is... (Starts speaking in Greek.)
KINGCOBRA: What did you say?
BROOKLYN: I have no idea. I just made that up.
KINGCOBRA: Impressive.
BROOKLYN: Thanks.
Necromancer leaped forward, grabbing Elisa by the front of her jacket. She screamed.
ELISA: Hey! Leggo my favorite jacket!
"STOP CALLING ME BROOKLYN!!!!!!!!"
DEMONA: (Necromancer) And start calling me Lurch!
he roared in her face. Her hair flew back and she closed her eyes, trembling. Necromancer took a deep breath and with a low growl, set her back on the ground. He looked down at her as she grabbed
KINGCOBRA: (Matt) Hey! Watch where you're grabbing! On the other hand, though,...
onto Matt for support.
Necromancer had been taller than her before, but now she seemed like an ant to him.
DEMONA: So Necromancer slammed his foot on her, ridding me and the rest of this planet of that inferior human filth forever.
(ELISA GLARES AT DEMONA.)
He stepped back, and let them stare at him. Suddenly, he saw the micro headset she always wore when one of the clan was patrolling with her. He snarled and looked up, scanning the tops of the buildings.
FOX: Until something white landed on his upturned face.
ELISA: Ew!
He caught sight of a pair of wings and hissed. He turned back to Elisa. He reached out and grabbed her.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Hey, where'd all those pigeons come from?!
Dimly, he heard the sounds of guns being loaded and the safety buttons being clicked off. He also heard Shania yell at him to let Elisa go and get the fuck out of there.
He didn't let her go, though. He had to know who is was that was following her. His eyes glowing so brightly that her face was illuminated, he snarled his question at her.
"Who's up there?" he hissed. He felt Heart's Blood tugging on his arm, and Shania yelling in his ear. He shook Elisa and screamed at her.
"WHO'S UP THERE??!!" he roared. Elisa swallowed.
ELISA: The Air Force, okay?! Now stop screaming in my face!
Suddenly, he heard Shania cry out.
FOX: (Shania) Look out for the incoming Goodyear Blimp!
"Necromancer! Look out!!"
Necromancer turned and let go of Elisa, and dodged out of the way of whoever was attacking him. He turned around, snarling, and saw her.
KINGCOBRA: Linda Tripp.
Angela.
It was Angela who was following Elisa, he realized. He backed up, growling. Angela was looking at him, a look of horror on her face. But there was anger too.
ANGELA: He'd called me Angie again.
"Brooklyn, what are you doing?"
BROOKLYN: (himself) Taking my revenge. You?
ANGELA: (herself) Minding my own business, frenching Broadway, protecting Elisa. The usual.
she asked him. Her eyes were wide, and she was holding Elisa up
KINGCOBRA: Off the edge of a building.
with one arm wrapped around her. Elisa was staring at him as though he might attack her again.
Necromancer felt the anger again, at being called Brooklyn. He felt Shania at his side, pulling on his arm. He glanced at her for a moment.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Baby, could you please refrain from pulling on my arm?
"We've been here longer than we needed to be," she hissed at him. "We should go before something happens."
FOX: (Shania) We should go before we get hit by a Greyhound.
Necromancer nodded. He turned back to Elisa.
KINGCOBRA: See ya!
Suddenly, a gunshot rang through the air. Someone screamed. Necromancer turned to see his daughter on the ground, holding her stomach.
ELISA: (Blood) Don't worry about me, Daddy. Just a slight flesh wound. Go one and finish what you were doing.
Blood seeped through her talons as she tried to stop the bleeding. Crimson Blade knelt beside her, holding her. She snarled and gasped something.
KINGCOBRA: (Heart, gasping) Tell Merrill to swing away.
With his heart in his throat
DEMONA: He choked to death.
Necromancer rushed over to her.
"What, hon?" he asked softly. She coughed, and gasped.
"That cop--" she coughed again, then pointed at Matt Bluestone. "That cop shot me!" She coughed again, then passed out. Shania reached down and cradled her daughter in her arms. Necromancer turned slowly, and he only turned slowly because he was pissed.
(KINGCOBRA PONDERS HEADING FOR THE HILLS.)
As he turned, he saw Elisa and Angela watching horrified. His gaze passed over them, and dimly he could tell that the look on his face chilled them.
KINGCOBRA: Especially since they were now frozen in ice.
He turned, everything going in slow motion for him, and his eyes locked on Matt. The cop gulped, and began to back up.
LEX: Hitting another vehicle.
KINGCOBRA: He's not in the car.
LEX: Oh.
"You...." Necromancer hissed, getting to his feet and beginning to stalk toward him. Matt began to back up.
(KINGCOBRA MIMICS A TRUCK BACKING UP.)
"YOU!!!" Necromancer roared, flaring his wings and baring his teeth. He felt his son at his side, but he didn't have to look to know that Crimson Blade had the same look on his face and rage in his heart that Necromancer did. Matt was backing up quickly.
LEX: (Matt) Hey, gee. Look at the time. I've, uh, got pizzas to pick up. Ciao!
Necromancer began to pick up speed, and then charged him. As he was leaping, he saw something out of the corner of his eye,
BROOKLYN: A UFO was attacking 'Independence Day' style.
and the next instant he was knocked sprawling.
He rolled over, and leaped to his feet. He growled.
LEX: Grrrrrrrrrr.....
Then he saw who had attacked him.
KINGCOBRA: It was Rocky.
BROOKLYN: Adrienne!
Goliath.
Necromancer stood up, his eyes lighting up brighter than before. He pulled his lips back so far you could see his gums.
KINGCOBRA: (to Brooklyn) Nice impression of a chimp there.
He curled his hands into fists, and bunched his muscles so that he seemed twice as big. He heaved in a deep breath.
Goliath was standing by
KINGCOBRA: It was 4 a.m. and the infomercials had ended.
Angela, and was holding Elisa in his arms. Necromancer heard him talking.
"Who is that?" he heard Goliath say to Angela, though it was Elisa who answered.
"It's Brooklyn," Elisa said dully. Goliath looked shocked.
GOLIATH: I had gotten drunk and mistook a floor lamp for Elisa.
"What?" he asked, then turned quickly to look at Necromancer again. His eyes widened. He took in a deep breath.
"My God,"
KINGCOBRA: Your god, what?
he whispered. He took a step toward Necromancer, but Elisa stopped him.
"Goliath don't," she said, her voice quaking with fear. "He might kill you." Goliath looked startled at that.
GOLIATH: Brooklyn could kill someone??
"Goliath you didn't see how he was acting earlier," she said, her eyes brimming with tears. "He hates us, Goliath. God knows why, but he does."
BROOKLYN: They had replaced my spot on the Parapets with Griff.
Goliath looked back at him, and saw the stance Necromancer was in. He stepped back, seeing the look on Necromancer's face.
KINGCOBRA: Which was painted in clown colors and topped by a big red wig.
Necromancer raised his hand and pointed one talon at Goliath, beckoning. Goliath stepped back, eyes wide. Necromancer smiled nastily.
"Oh, Goliath," he sang lightly. His face hardened. "Why don't you come here and give your old buddy a hug?"
BROOKLYN: (himself) Hahahahahahahahaha!!!
He threw back his head and began to laugh. A sudden sound attracted his attention.
KINGCOBRA: Broadway�s belch which sounded like a meteor crashing.
Two more gargoyles landed off to the left of him.
Broadway and Lexington. His rookery brothers.
Old memories of all the good times he had had with them came flooding through his mind. He brushed those thoughts away when he remembered that they had betrayed him, left him to Blake. He growled. Suddenly, another gargoyle landed beside them. A pretty green female with a huge triceratops-like shield and horns on her head. She looked at him, and he looked back at her.
ELISA: (Ophelia) Hello, I am Ophelia. And you are?
BROOKLYN: (himself, angrily.) Your worst nightmare.
~Who the hell is that?~ Necromancer wondered. Then he brushed the thought aside, and turned back to Goliath. By then, Shania had carried Heart's Blood over to him and Crimson Blade.
DEMONA: (Shania) Necromancer, honey? Oof� the kids are heavy� could you take them, please? (THUD) Honey, could you help me up please?
He glanced at his daughter, whose wound was now bandaged. He sighed in relief.
LEX: Which was really spelled R-O-L-A-I-D-S.
~Thank God she's okay,~ he thought.
FOX: Thanks, God.
Suddenly, Goliath coughed to get his attention. He turned and looked at him. Goliath was now standing with Angela, Broadway, Lexington and Elisa on each side of him. Necromancer growled.
"Brooklyn," Goliath said softly. Necromancer hissed.
"My name is NOT Brooklyn," he said, his eyes glowing. "My name is Necromancer."
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) So there!
Broadway and Lexington looked startled at that, and the others looked at each other in confusion. Necromancer growled. Shania turned to him and touched his shoulder with her tail.
"We should go, my love," she whispered. " We must get Heart's Blood to a safe place."
FOX: (Shania) We must take Heart�s Blood to the bottom of the Hudson!
Necromancer nodded. He turned to the other gargoyles.
"We will finish this later," he hissed, then pointed at Matt. "You will pay for hurting my daughter." This last statement was followed by a dark cold look. "And you will all pay for hurting me." He turned and leaped up the side of the nearest building. From behind him he dimly heard Lexington mutter "his daughter?".
BROOKLYN: No, my female gargoyle version of �Mini-Me�.
He reached the top of the building and took Heart's Blood into his arms and leaped into the night air,
LEX: Smacking into the side of the plane passing overhead.
with Shania and Crimson Blade behind him. He looked back once, to see his former clan watching him.
~I will be back for you,~ he thought angrily. ~This is not over.~
(ALL LAUGH SINISTERLY.)
*******************
The Next Night
Necromancer awoke with a loud roar, as did the rest of his family. He turned quickly, and walked over to Heart's Blood. He knelt down next to her.
KINGCOBRA: (Brooklyn) Honey, did the bad man kill you?
�Are you all right, daughter?" he asked. She looked at him with her forest green eyes so much like his own, and nodded.
"Yes father," she replied. " I am healed. But I want revenge," she hissed, her eyes glowing a ruby red in the darkness. Necromancer nodded.
"We will make a full assault on the castle. If I know Goliath well enough he will keep Matt with him until he is sure that the human is safe.
LEX: Safe?! In Manhattan?!!
(ALL LAUGH LIKE CRAZY.)
We will most likely find them at the Castle." Shania nodded.
The four gargoyles leaped into the night, heading toward Castle Wyvern, and their vengeance.
*********************
Necromancer circled the castle a few times, then joined his family high above the large building. He glided up to them and nodded.
"It's time," he said, his voice like venom. " I was just making sure they saw me."
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) I flipped them off.
Shania nodded, and they descended to the courtyard. They landed with silence, and stood there waiting.
"They'll be out in a few moments,"
KINGCOBRA: Three hours later, they still stood there, waiting.
FOX: (Shania) Honey, they�re still not here yet. Can we leave now?
Necromancer said, eyes lighting up. He was right. Within moments, the alarm went off and the gargoyles rushed outside.
Goliath stopped in mid-run to look at them. For a few moments they looked at each other. Necromancer's eyes began to glow. He hissed.
"You son of a bitch,"
GOLIATH: Hey, my Rookery mother was not a bitch.
he hissed, taking a step toward Goliath. Suddenly, from behind Goliath's massive bulk three hatchlings the same age as his children emerged. Necromancer stopped his advance and stared.
~It seems that some things have changed around here,~ he thought, looking at the three young gargoyles. One was a dark cinnamon colored female that was obviously half human. She had long black hair and brown eyes.
~Goliath and Elisa's child,~ Necromancer thought. Beside her was another female, a turquoise blue one with brown hair. She stared curiously at him, almost as if she recognized him.
DEMONA: (Turquoise child) Hello, do I know you?
~Angela and Broadway's,~ Necromancer thought immediately.
KINGCOBRA: I really, really don�t need to read anything that would plant images of their passionate activities in my head.
Then a third stepped out. He was an olive green male with webbed wings and red hair. He had Lexington's eyes. Necromancer nearly jumped out of his skin.
BROOKLYN: Behold my leaping skeleton! Aren�t my bones nice and white?
~ Lexington's,~ he thought vaguely. The three youngsters stared at him in awe. Then the male turned to Lexington.
"I thought he was dead?" the youngster said.
Lexington shushed him.
"Hush, Lyman!" Lexington said quickly. "We thought he was, too." Necromancer growled.
LEX: Even though I like Brooklyn in a brotherly kind of way, I kind of wish he was. Then the fic would be over.
"Well, Lexington, I'm not," he snarled. "Though why you would lie to your own child is beyond me." Lexington stared at him.
"What do you mean?" he asked. Necromancer growled and pointed at them.
"Oh, sure!" he hissed. "Like you didn't know!" Broadway frowned.
KINGCOBRA: (Broadway) Brooklyn, what are you doing here?
"Know what?" he asked. Necromancer hissed again and shook his head.
"Stop screwing around with my head!" he shouted. "You all planned for me to get caught by that bastard didn't you?!" The hatchlings gasped. The green adult female growled.
"Watch your language!"
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Fuck that!
she scolded. Necromancer hissed at her.
"Who the hell are you?" he demanded. She stared at him angrily.
"I am Ophelia," she stated. Necromancer started in shock. ~Ophelia?~
"You're from Avalon, aren't you?" he asked. She nodded. Necromancer waved his hand in dismissal. "It doesn't matter where you're from," he concluded. " I don't have a quarrel with you. But if you get in my way, we'll kill you, too." The green youngster growled.
"You will not!" he said angrily. " I wont let you!" Heart's Blood hissed.
LEX: Hiss!
"Don't speak to my father that way, imp!" she snarled. Goliath looked at him.
"You are their father?" he asked, bewildered. Necromancer nodded, a snarl on his face.
"Yes, I am," he growled. "I met Shania during my....imprisonment." Goliath looked confused. Necromancer pointed at him and snarled.
"Like you didn't know!" he shouted. "You planned the whole thing!"
BROOKLYN: And it wasn't no surprise party.
Suddenly, a red-haired man came out one of the doors into the courtyard. Necromancer turned to look and jumped in surprise.
"Alex?" he asked. The man looked at him.
"Hello, Brooklyn," Alex said softly. Necromancer hissed.
KINGCOBRA: Man, there's just as much hissing going on in this fic as there is lip-curling.
"Why can't any of you get it through your thick heads that I'm not Brooklyn anymore!" he hollered. Alex jumped back, then stared hard at him. His eyes widened.
"You have changed," he said, his face sad. "You're not the same gargoyle I knew when I was a baby. That gargoyle cared about me, and about the clan. You don't." Shania smiled in contempt.
ALL: (Clan) Uh, excuse us for interrupting, but... who ARE you?
"It is no wonder that he does not care for any of you anymore," she said. " Seeing as how you left him in the hands of a madman." Everyone looked totally lost. Necromancer became confused. He stepped back, then shook his head violently.
"You lying bastards!!! You did know!!!" he screamed, the rage flaring back up, and leaped for Goliath.
KINGCOBRA: Cool! Another kick-ass fight sequence!
He swung at the huge gargoyle, and his fist contacted with Goliath's jaw. Necromancer shrieked in rage, eyes blazing. He swiped with his talons, and left claw marks on Goliath's chest. Goliath stumbled back with a roar of pain. Necromancer kept up the assault. He kicked Goliath in the belly, and threw him against the wall.
LEX: Wow, I never knew Brooklyn was that strong.
Goliath recovered, and grabbed Necromancer by the shoulders. He picked him up and was about throw him away,
ELISA: It's the trash heap for you, mister!
but Necromancer wrapped his legs around Goliath's waist and grabbed Goliath's throat. Necromancer squeezed his throat, trying to choke him. Goliath growled, and pried Necromancer's hands from his throat. He pushed him away. Necromancer leaped away, and turned his head slightly.
The clan and Necromancer's own children were watching, horrified. Suddenly, Necromancer felt a hand on his arm. He turned to see Lexington holding his arm, his eyes wet with tears.
LEX: Waa.
"Brooklyn, why are you doing this?" he asked, his voice wavering. "What happened to you?"
KINGCOBRA: I became Saddam Hussein�s slave.
Necromancer stepped back, pulling away. The glow left his eyes. He looked right into Lexington's face, and into his eyes. Suddenly, a wave of shock overcame him. He stepped away, and walked unsteadily to his family. Shania put her hands on his shoulders, and looked worriedly at him.
ELISA: (Shania) Honey, your lovely hair�s not falling out, right?
"My love, are you all right?" she asked. Heart's Blood and Crimson Blade watched him, worry all over their faces, not understanding what was going on. Necromancer ignored Shania's question, and spoke to Lexington.
"You mean....you didn't know?" he asked, the anger leaving his voice. Lexington shook his head.
"No, we didn't," Lexington said softly.
"But...didn't you even notice that...that I was gone?" This time Broadway nodded.
ALL: Uh, not really.
"We looked for you everywhere, but we couldn't find you," he said, his voice quaky.
LEX: His voice was a 9.5 on the Richter scale.
"We even had Talon and the mutates looking for you. We tried everything, but it was like you just vanished." Angela stepped forward.
"We thought that you had left the clan," she said. "We thought that maybe we had done something that hurt you, and you decided to leave." Necromancer shook his head furiously, trying to get rid off all the thoughts in his head.
"You hurt me by leaving me with Blake!" he shouted. "You hurt me by letting him destroy my
KINGCOBRA: Beautiful white hair.
soul! You hurt me by killing what and who I was! You were my clan. Clan is supposed to protect each other. And you did nothing like that for me!"
He was screaming, but he didn't care. All the hate he felt toward them over the past twenty-five years was for nothing. They really hadn't known where he was, or what had happened to him. They had assumed he was either dead or had abandoned them. He took a few steps back, and came in contact with Shania. She put her hand on his shoulder, and when he looked at her he saw the same feelings in her eyes that he felt.
FOX: (Shania) I feel gassy. That�s the last time I ever eat at Taco Bell.
He looked back at the other gargoyles, at his clan. They were all staring at him, sorrow and pity written all over their faces.
(KINGCOBRA TRIES NOT TO GET SWAYED BY THIS MUSH.)
He saw in their eyes, they still loved him. They always had. He felt everything inside break down,
KINGCOBRA: So Brooklyn was a robot, and he malfunctioned?
and he swallowed.
"You didn't know," he whispered. Goliath shook his head. Necromancer stepped back, and nearly fell over.
BROOKLYN: Pinning Shania beneath me.
Shania caught him. He looked at her.
"They didn't know," he whispered. "It was all for
KINGCOBRA: Double or.
nothing." Crimson Blade let out a small sound, and Necromancer turned around. Lyman, the young male gargoyle, Lexington's son, was behind him. Necromancer looked at him, eyes wide. The youngster smiled.
"I heard a lot of stuff about you, Uncle Brooklyn,"
LEX: Like how much of a loser you are with the ladies.
KINGCOBRA: Hey, be nice to Brooklyn!
he said shyly. " I always wanted to meet you.
KINGCOBRA: (Lyman) I always wanted to meet my idol!
Uncle Broadway and Dad really were worried." Necromancer swallowed.
"I....had no idea," he whispered. Then he looked up at them. He swallowed again. His lip quivered slightly.
BROOKLYN: No more salty popcorn for me.
"I'm....sorry. I'm so, so sorry." He started to cry. " I hated you, and it wasn't your fault." Goliath walked forward, slowly. He stopped in front of Necromancer.
"It is I who should apologize," he said. His eyes were full of tears. "We should have looked harder.
KINGCOBRA: (Goliath) But that evening had been Lobster night at he Xanatos� dinner.
We...didn't know." Necromancer burst into harder sobs and collapsed.
DEMONA: Off the bridge, into the Hudson River. The End.
Goliath caught him, and Necromancer wrapped his arms around him, sobbing bitterly.
Shania, Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood stood back. They had never seen him cry before. Necromancer kept sobbing, his shoulders heaving as his leader held him.
(ALL BREAK INTO MOCK CRYING.)
GOLIATH: Please do not poke fun at the sentimentality.
(ALL STOP.)
~They do care,~ he thought. ~They always did. What have I done?~ "I'm sorry, Goliath," Necromancer whispered. "I thought you planned it. I thought....I thought you didn't want to find me. I thought you wanted me dead." He sniffed, and looked up at Goliath who wore a sad expression on his face. "I wanted to kill you, Goliath.
KINGCOBRA: So stop whimpering and do it!
And I would have. I'm sorry."
KINGCOBRA: Dammit!
Goliath smiled.
"It's all right, Brooklyn," he said softly, helping Necromancer to his feet. Necromancer sniffed and made a face at him.
BROOKLYN: I smelled the Burritos Goliath had eaten.
"How many times do I have to say that my name isn't Brooklyn?"
GOLIATH: I do not know. A Thousand?
he asked quietly. Goliath looked sad.
KINGCOBRA: Goliath had watched 'Old Yeller' for the very first time.
Necromancer swallowed.
"Brooklyn died a long time ago Goliath," he said. "And I'm being serious. I'm not the same person. I did change."
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) I'm more girl crazy then ever. Speaking of which. Demona, you wanna... tour my bedroom?
(GOLIATH STARTS HYPERVENTILATING DUE TO THE EVENTS OF "FUTURE TENSE" SEEMING TO COME TRUE.)
DEMONA: (frowns) No.
BROOKLYN: Damn.
GOLIATH: (Under his breath) Whew.
Goliath nodded.
"I understand," he said. "Necromancer." Necromancer smiled. Lexington and Broadway came forward.
KINGCOBRA: (Broadway) Long time no see, Bro. You didn't happen to bring me back some chicken from KFC, did you?
"Hey, bro," Lexington said softly. Necromancer looked at him and smiled.
"Hey," he said. Lex smiled, and so did Broadway. Necromancer hugged them. When they parted, Elisa came forward. Necromancer looked at her in shame.
"Elisa, I'm--" he started, but Elisa cut him off.
LEX: In her car.
"It's okay," she said, hugging him. Necromancer hugged her back. Then Angela came up to him. She smiled.
"It's good to see you again," she said, also hugging him. Necromancer smiled, and then hugged the others one by one. He was surprised to see Hudson, but didn't say anything when he hugged him.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Ow... Hudson... my ribs...
A sudden cough attracted his attention. He turned to see Shania and his kids standing there, looking slightly amused.
"Oh," he said. Then he grinned. "Everyone, this is my mate, Shania." Shania stepped forward and bowed. Goliath nodded and smiled at her.
KINGCOBRA: (Goliath) She is a choice piece of ass, Brooklyn.
LEX: (Necromancer) How many times must I say my name isn't Brooklyn?! (Mimics sounds of fighting.)
Hudson stepped forward.
"Welcome to our clan, lass," he said, grasping her wrist gargoyle fashion.
DEMONA: And breaking it. Shania socked the Old Fool across the jaw, and as the clan began tearing into each other, Necromancer learned a valuable lesson. Never take Clan for granted.
Shania nodded.
"Who are they?"
BROOKLYN: Little pests.
Lyman asked. Necromancer nodded to Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood.
"They," he said. "Are my children. Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood." Goliath raised his eye ridge at the names, but greeted them kindly.
The two young gargoyles bowed ceremoniously, and Lyman couldn't stop staring at Heart's Blood. She looked a little nervous at the attention she was receiving from him, and tried to hide behind her brother.
Necromancer noticed that Crimson Blade seemed to be eyeing Broadway and Angela's daughter, Avery.
GOLIATH: (Crimson) Excuse me, but would that be an ice cream cone in your right hand?
(BROADWAY STARTS DROOLING FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.)
He smiled to himself when Heart's Blood slapped him on the arm and told him to keep Lyman away from her. Necromancer looked at Broadway, and Broadway looked back at him. Then they joined Lexington in the look, and the three grinned.
Necromancer walked over to them and whispered quietly into their ears.
BROOKLYN: (himself) Okay, here is what Titania had said to Fox... (whispers unintelligebly.)
ALL: What did she say? You've gotta tell us!
BROOKLYN: Sorry. Totally confidental.
KINGCOBRA: Then why'd you bring it up?!
BROOKLYN: To screw with your minds.
"Now that I'm back I think things will go a little more smoothly," he whispered. They grinned.
~ Perhaps this is for the best,~ he thought as he watched his family interact with his clan. He looked up at the sky and smiled. ~ Am I ever glad that I'm home.~
FOX: Then David had a change of heart and, out of the blue, evicted them from the Castle again.
LEX: Why would he do that?
FOX: That dog of yours left fleas all over the place.
LEX: But Bronx doesn't have fleas.
FOX: Uh... (starts looking innocent)
******************************************
Necromancer stopped. He looked at the gargoyles and humans around him and smiled.
~ My clan,~ he thought. He smiled at them.
"So, now that our tale has been told, and all questions answered, we may finally be at peace,"
BROOKLYN: Unless Pestilence ever gets it in her head to write a sequel.
KINGCOBRA: Never gonna happen.
BROOKLYN: How do you know?
KINGCOBRA: I just do.
he said, looking around the room. " We did not feel that we could tell it to you and be at peace until now. We were not ready. Now, though, perhaps you will understand why we did not tell you before. It is, and always will be, a difficult thing to remember. Now you know our past, and the future is still ahead. We hope that you understand us now, and forgive us for what we had almost done. That is all."
Necromancer stood up, stretching his legs. The clan began to applaud. The applause became louder, and Necromancer smiled.
Goliath came forward, and shook his hand. Necromancer nodded.
"I am truly sorry, Goliath," he said. "But I hope you understand."
LEX: (Necromancer) I hope you understand why I slept with Elisa.
(GOLIATH'S EYES GLOW WHITE AND HE LOOKS AT LEX ANGRILY.)
Goliath nodded.
"I do," he said. "I'm very proud of you, my friend. I have never been prouder." Goliath smiled at him.
KINGCOBRA: So, let me get this straight. Brooklyn got captured, blamed the clan, killed humans, attacked the clan, and Goliath is proud of him. Right. And I hang out with Casper in the Amityville House.
Necromancer returned the grin, and all of a sudden the hatchlings swarmed around them, hugging Necromancer. He smiled, and looked at them.
BROOKLYN: (himself) You all suck and I hope you die.
The applause went on, and Necromancer looked at his family. Shania, Crimson Blade and Heart's Blood came to him, and he stood with them, surrounded by hatchlings, a contented smile on his face.
LEX: This is starting to feel like we�re watching some chick flick or something.
They stood like that for a while,
LEX: (Crimson Blade) Daddy, my feet are getting tired.
KINGCOBRA: (Necromancer) Just keep waving and smiling.
BROOKLYN: For some odd reason, it feels like me and the others were at a ticker tape parade or something. Why are we being so honored? We killed humans and attacked my clan!
KINGCOBRA: Goliath believes in �Forgive and Forget�.
his family, happy just being where they were. Surrounded by hatchlings, Necromancer looked back on his life. He didn't regret what happened, not anymore. Like Shania had once said, perhaps when they were chosen by Blake and taken against their wills to fight, it was for the best.
BROOKLYN: Yeah, mainly cause Blake had pissed the powers-that-be off too much.
They had learned so much, and were stronger than they had ever been. And to top it all off, they had come out ahead in life. They had a clan that loved them, even after what they had done. They were accepted for who they were, and what they were. Nothing mattered now, except they were happy.
Truly, finally, happy.
KINGCOBRA: Wow, what a nice, only slightly sappy, ending.
THE END
I hope you liked this story. I'm not writing anything else that has to do with this fanfic Universe.
KINGCOBRA: (To Brooklyn) This is how I know there won't be a sequel to this.
This is a one of a kind item. If you're wondering why I decided to write it, it just came to me in a dream,
KINGCOBRA: Hey, I�ve had dreams about the moon turning into cheese, but you don�t see me writing about it.
and until I wrote it the damn thing wouldn't leave my head alone. Now I can sleep in peace, and not worry about it. Questions, comments, flames or anything else, send to me at : [email protected]
FOX: 'yahoo.ca'?
LEX: The author was going for a Mr. Hanky moment.
ALL: (Singsong) HOW-DY HO!!!
***
Status:
Began July 21st, 2004
Finished August 7th, 2004
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