No Indian restaurant in Harvard Square tonight. Just soup, liquids, words of comfort and a James Bond movie for the flu-stricken.
A few hours cleaning up and moving computer files. Everything I learn seems to raise new questions. It's all kind of an enigma. But I admire people who have figured it out.
june 4
june 4
on the way home
june 7
a thousand words - june 7
time and space
june 7
wheels - june 7
back in the rain
june 9
june 9
An extra day to the weekend and a drive into the city at night to decide what to do. A poster for the Olympics in a travel agency takes my thoughts elsewhere. We decide to see The Buena Vista Social Club at the Brattle in Harvard Square at 10 - plenty of time to get something to drink and walk through the square watching street performers and stopping at the bookshop. On to the Brattle, a pretty good film. It's dark and late when we leave, but a little music still on the street and people hungry to hear it.
june 10
june 10
There's a restaurant in Boston whose theme is a kiss. The pictures on the walls are kiss paintings and photos - cupids on tapestry and '40's style photographs - various images that all seem to work together.
My favorite is the sculptor who has made a marble statue of a woman. She turns her head to kiss him and he surrounds her in embrace. He has taken something part of him and made it visible and touchable. When she feels her separation she turns to rejoin him in a new way. An endless sweet circle where find and rejoin always come after separate.
june10
wheels june 10
objects in mirror are closer than they appear
june 14
a thousand words - june 14
too much for one
june 19
june 19
on two journeys, but together
time to rest along the way tonight
tired, settled, encircled by arms from behind,
warm, safe, adrift, asleep
chosen music as a common blanket
covers us
june 20
june 20
The solstice, and a preternatural quality to the light all day. The first day of summer, but every day will be shorter now. Tradeoffs, it always seems to be that way with time.
june 20
june 20
"the odds and ends that go to make a day ..."
june24
june 24
Scattered thoughts. A little out of yesterday's dreamlike state, my brain
doing a better job of grasping new information today.
It's warm tonight, so we head downtown to Newbury Street,
little white lights
in all of the trees,throngs of people everywhere, eager for summer after
no real spring. Shop a little while to replace a lost sports watch, but not much
luck. Just nice to be out, walking and talking.
A choice of places with outdoor tables. A favorite, one we
haven't tried since last September. Not so long ago, but seems like a world
away. An hour wait for a table, all the better. Inside to the darkened bar area.
Full of people, that good city feeling, anonymous faces that are somehow familiar,
and music. I can't tell who's singing, but others would know .
june 25
june 25
this reminds me of a story ...
june 27
june 27
In one of those moments when life surely changes, found out I have
a curable cancer. Not too happy about it, but I wouldn't want to be
anyone but me, so maybe this is just a part of being me.
What I find myself wondering is just when that first cell divided. Did
I sense in any way that something was wrong?
So one step in front of the other until this is done. So far there have
been kind strangers everywhere I turn, a good feeling.
june 28
june 28
That Dave Matthews Crash song on the car radio, and then again from the
man playing the guitar in the train station. He doesn't sing it, but the melody
sounds pretty echoing through the station. Everyone hurrying down the stairs
to get to the trains, blurs of briefcases and bags slung over shoulders. Find
a seat and look around. The guy across from me is wearing a Rage Against
The Machine T shirt and reading Investors Business Daily. I like that
somehow and it makes me smile.
On the way out of the T stop decide to change my usual routine and try a
cafe that overlooks the Common. More than bakery things for breakfast and
I'm hungry today. A warm day, a short distance to work, drifting thoughts, nice to walk slowly.
june 29
june 29
so many people everyday,
small talk, pleasantries,
face to face with so many people,
waiting in the same lines, going to the same places,
crossing paths with so many people,
smiling, making contact with their eyes,
so many people near enough to touch,
but none of them is you.
june 30
june 30
Information overload on cancer and its treatment. Trying to keep notes too,
so I bought a bright yellow folder to keep everything in. Wanted to have
something cheerful to look at for the next several months.
Chest X-rays and blood tests this week. Looking around the waiting room
is different from looking around on the train.Someone waiting across from me
is having a Tay-Sachs test and he looks pretty nervous. Two pre-school brothers
are there too but they'd rather be home. The younger one has the bloodwork and
cries through the whole thing, his brother crying in sympathy.
Talking with the little girl next to me who is getting impatient with the wait.
She asks me to guess her age. She's pretty tall and it's more flattering to
children when you overestimate so I say 13. Not a bad place to start, but I'm off by a bit - she'll get
there, but not for a little while to come.
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