SO anyway. Yes, I'm torn. But I guess I can get into that later. I'm also very sleepy. So maybe the feelings of being "torn" are just a subset of my sleepiness; a manifestation, if you will, of my non-knowing-what-to-do-with-my-sleepy-self. You know?! Whatever. Last night Elle came over and we FINISHED (drum roll pleeeeeaaassseeee!!!!@!) the wedding programs for Gi and T's wedding. YaHoO!@! It's finished! It's finished! I just hope that they end up liking 'em. Whatever. There's not much that they can do about it now. They're done, and they look mighty good. So there. AHAHAHA. I felt a sense of accomplishment after all was said and done. So I toted Elle and I to Cosi for drinks... ahaha, that's a latte and a smoothie. There was no martini sippin' last night. But we had our usual kick-ass conversation about life and being able to appreciate it as is. Ahhh.. You may not understand what that means, my friend, but I guess you weren't meant to understand. Let's just say that we, among others of the growing minority, are very much into our independent lives that life is just so sweet as it is... AS IS. Some people need that certain something in life to keep 'em going: that high-profile career, the love of a mate, continued education, or living off the seat of your pants... Whichever category you belong to, and you may very well belong to more than one, you should embrace it and enjoy it. But most important of all, don't let anyone dictate to you what YOUR life should be all about. Like Janet says, "It's all for YOU."
SO back to my dazed and confused ass. SO, I want to go to the SFC Conference in LA now. But then again I don't. I'm going through such a mix of things. First of all, we all know that I am so anti-SFC right now. Well, not really "anti," but more of "diluted..." LOL. Let's just say that I'm not into the whole compressed, bubble-like existence that I tend to see SFC members embracing. I remember that I used to, esp. after I first joined, but after some kicks and falls I've realized that there's so much more to being a Christian in the "real" world, than being a Christian in the "ideal" world. While I believe that the community does a great job of "protecting" us from the "perils" of real life, I think I've experienced enough things in life to actually appreciate the trappings of the "real world." I think that facing the real world head-on makes for a stronger person, esp. if you continue to come up on top with the Lord's guidance. And I don't mean closing yourself to the normal things that people do: clubbing, drinking (of course not in excess), meeting friends for happy hours, or going on trips, or just living life as NORMAL as possible. Doing those things are fine, although many people in community tend to think that it's a hindrance to living the "almost perfect Christ-like life." Right. And I'm esp. not into travelling in packs of people (loud people to boot), looking for places that are supposedly "SFC-friendly." Like I understand where they're coming from, but at the same time I am not at all one for seclusion and labeling. First of all, I'm not about singling out my brethren as being simply "SFC." They're human first. And why can't we hang out ANYwhere? As long as you're not doing anything wrong, then you're in good graces. I don't think that we have to congregate at like "Christian" places solely, nor do I think that we have to go to restaurants that are specificly geared towards the "SFC crowd..." Now what kind of restaurant would that be? I figure that all restaurants are open to everyone and anyone. NOW - if you're gonna bring in a rack of people and expect tables to be put together to accomodate the masses, then just be smart and pick a place that'll accomodate the group quickly and without much of a second wink. Oh, and if you're into big groups, then PRIVATE rooms are SMART...
Anyway. That's besides the point. Despite my personal feelings on SFC, and how it tends to feel like a non-inclusive group (i'm all about the infiltration here), I like what it is for me PERSONALLY. While I may not hang out with SFC people specifically, or though I may not attend all the meetings and retreats and all that other stuff, I like what it is/what it does for me PERSONALLY. It has truly strengthened my understanding of God's love, and knowing His plan in my life... but in no way has it changed me from the fun-loving person that I am to an introverted church-going recluse. I don't judge people, and especially if they're into things that may seem unconventionally "un-SFC." When I look at a person, I see them as a human being above all else. If you're a Christian, then more power to you. So am I. But that's as far as that goes...
So yeah, I'm torn cause I think I want to go to the conference to be able to feel that fire that I've been lacking. And I want to see my friends from the other areas. And, if possible, I want to serve. But it doesn't mean that I want to get into the thick of SFC once again and to immerse my life in it fully. I want it as a part of me, as it already is a part of me, but I don't want it to BE me. Only I am ME, and I am happy with ME :) I still didn't answer my own question: should I stay or should I go (to conference?!)?! LOL!
We arrived here early Friday morning, around 3am-ish. We're at Katz' place in Norfolk. So we don't really sleep until 5am (thankfully we missed-out on that trife 4th-of-july PRE-traffic mess on I-95), and our crazy-butts got up at like 10am. We got ready and went to Va Beach's Fil-Am Friendship Day picnic. It was a mad-Filipino fest. I don't even go to those things back home anymore, so don't ask me WHY I even went to this one. But it was interesting. As usual, I come to Va Beach and unexpectedly have "run-ins" with people I know. My Auntie Nilda saw me at the picnic, and she came to say "hello!" My cousin, Alvin, was visiting from Fairfax with his wife and new daughter, Kateri. She's a precious little one, btw. Then I saw Gemini and a few other YFCers. And then of all people, I run into Jane Caburian... and then Rithy. LOL! I didn't see Chelmo or Rak, but I heard that they were there, too. After some halo-halo, and after some shows and mingling, we headed to the beach. It was insane. NO parking. We found a spot after a while. We walked around for a bit, then we went to get our grub on. All-you-can-eat Alaskan King Crab legs at Inlet is the BEST. That's all I gotta say. When dinner was done, we caught the fireworks just outside of the harbor... then we headed home.
It's a really good get-away. Just time to relax and chill before going back to work on Monday. Elle and I will leave here later today, and we'll be home sometime tonight. In the meantime, the bed is calling me. I ain't so young no more... Wen needs his sleep. *g'nite*
HAVE FUN IN JAX, MESH!!! *wink*
"Where is the love? Where is the love? Where is the love? Where is the love - the love - the love?!" Can you tell that I have a certain song in my head? Ahahaah... Well, it's better this song than "The Jump-Off" or "Magic Stick." Tell my WHY my ass gets up and turns on the radio in the bathroom, and Lil' Kim is on talkin' about what she can do with a Sprite can and sheeeyt. I used to sweat that song, but c'mon now. I hate you, 99.5! YOU RUIN ALL THE SONGS. You try to be so R&B, but face it...you're a POP station. Accept it. Live with it. Move on.It's the end of the work-week, and I can't be happier. But I don't know why I'm complaining. I'm always working some off work-week - calling-in one day, leaving early another. Work-shmerk. Just pay me already. In fact, I think I'm itchin' for a raise. That's why I liked my other contracting company better. They raised me every chance they could. This company that I work for now, though, is freakin' CHEAP-ASS. But I don't want to talk about work and all the things that make it more funner than it really is... *yawn* It's the end of the work week, as I was saying, and supposedly this is going to be one travelin' weekend. People are goin' here, goin' there, doin' this, and doin' that. On the news this morning, Katie Couric told me that there were gonna be a gazillion travelers on the roads this weekend. She got her info according to this poll and that poll, which brings me to my ill today. WHAT THE HELL IS SHE TALKING ABOUT? I would like to think that I am part of the gazillion people out there who call themselves "American," but you know what? I ain't never take that damn poll. In fact, whenever there's a story or mention of a percentage of Americans doing this or having that, I know that ish don't include me cause like I said - I AIN'T NEVER TAKE THAT DAMN POLL. I think it's a travesty on the part of the federal system that not everyone can be counted... and even still, they generalize that gazillions of people will do this or have that or say this. Just bite me already. And now they're playing "Proud To Be An American" by the American Idols - and now I'm getting teary-eyed, and I'm sorry for complaining about what I just said... "And I gladly stand-up next to you, and defend her still today... and there ain't no doubt that I love this land... God bless the USA!!" Sing it Trenyce... LOL.
OK, I think I'm over the bi-polar episode there. Now that I think of it, who cares about the damn poll. I ain't a part of it, so bump it. It's another nod to my non-conformity. I'm so over it.
What else was going on in my mind? Oh yeah. Bills. Beyonce, Kelly, and Michelle were straight-up truthful when they were talkin' about havin' someone pay their bills for their skank-asses. I ain't stank, but someone PLEASE feel free to pay my damn bills. Just bring it. I'll be waiting. Anyway. Thankfully, the direct deposit came in last night. I am now a semi-happy camper. But you know what keeps flashing back in my head? It's that pack of Reese's Pieces that's sitting in the vending machine outside my office. Yummm... But I'm hesitant, cause the funky Latino guy who puts that stuff in the machine always has really bad body odor, and I'm scared that the smell and stuff transcends into the machine - contaminating all the food inside. I don't need the Reese's Pieces anyway. I'm fat as it is. I'm bloated today. I don't know why. I feel like I'm retaining water, but I'm pissin' like a freakin' hose. Speaking of which, gotta run to the bathroom. Happy 4th - to you, and you, and you...
OUT: Probably the biggest "OUT-OF-STYLE" trend of the past two years would be the "bowling shoe" and "bowling shoe prototypes." I mean, they were cool at first, but now everyone and their lolo has a pair. Not to mention, even Payless has their own versions of the retro-lookin' shoe. Now you know when Payless gets on the band-wagon with a certain style of shoe, it's time to move on. The bigger shoe names came out with them first: Kenneth Cole & Camper. Then Diesel followed suit. Then smaller names like Steve Madden and Skecher came out with their versions, too...until all of a sudden little kids were sportin' the "bowling shoe." Well, sorry to tell you... but they're totally 2002. And since it's 2003, it's time to move on. Probably the worst of them all would be the styles by Diesel. Sure Diesel is a reknown "name" in fashion, but believe it or not, they're known more for their jeans than anything else. Their shoes, especially, are some of the ugliest out on the market. I even own two pairs of Diesel shoes, and I look back and think about how stupid I was to have bought them. As 2003 comes along, Diesel is STILL pushin' those bowling-type shoes. It's funny because their shoe counterparts, like Ken Cole and Camper, have veered away from that look already. Like one former Diesel fan once told me (my sister - ahahah): "Diesel shoes are the ugliest shoes out there... they were hot for a minute, but not anymore." I have to agree. So yeah, Diesel shoes, and bowling shoes in general, are at the top of the OUT list. If you're gonna wear shoes that you wanna sport as "sporty," then stick to Nike, New Balance, and Addidas...the REAL deals.
IN: There are so many "IN" things right now, but since it's summer-time, I'll have to stick to those styles that are fit for summer. And since I'm talkin' about shoes, might as well keep on the subject. (clothes i can do another time... LOL!) For the sporty look, the "classic" shoe is definitely IN. Now we're talking classic styles from Nike, Reebok, New Balance, and even Puma. Actually, Pumas are HOT this summer... just look at any shoe store in any mall, and you'll see why. The classic style gives off a clean overall look, which is totally what the summer calls for. If dressing down even more is your game, then turn to sandals. Right now, thong-sandals are probably most "in." Not so much those leather sandals with the complicated straps, or the "different" variations of the thong. Again, it's back to the classic look - basic and simple, yet very chic. Banana Republic has a pair of classic slipper-thongs for both men and women. If you sport them in leather...even better. ALDO has a cool pair for guys, leather sandals with a print on 'em. And for the bummin' around look: take the sandal-thongs at the GAP. If you're dressin' up...ladies KNOW that boots are a no-no. It's all about the strappy sandals. Guys - you can still get away with boots and jeans... but look for those sleek-lookin' narrow styles with a square toe. Those are a hot item right now. So yeah, people. Hook yo'selves UP!
ANYWAY. They just played The Jump-Off on the radio, and I'm annoyed as all hell. They are playin' that song OUT... OK, I just totally hallucinated. All this "trend" talk makes me wanna go out a pick something up. Oh, I got "free" Blistex lip-balm yesterday from Harris Teeter... ahhahaah... Long story. Well, not really, but whatever. Free is good. LOL.
Anyway. Point of conversation today: FREELOADING. More so, FREELOADERS. There's this one chick that hangs with them. Very nice girl. But she's a freakin' FREELOADER. Like she'll go out to lunch with the co-workers, and they say that almost all the time (ok, maybe i'm embellishing this a little bit. MOST of the time, not ALL the time) this chick has no money, or she brings no money. And my co-workers tell me she has these schemes: 1) she'll play like she forgot her wallet somewhere, 2) she'll act like she doesn't have enough, or 3) she'll ask someone to spot her cause she forgot or whatever. OK. It's happened a few times initially, which no one seemed to mind at all. BUT after it became habitual, the co-workers started to notice. One time, she went with Leslie, my co-worker, to Potbelly (a sandwich shop around the way), and supposedly she forgot her wallet, had no cash, etc.; THE WHOLE GAMUT. The co-worker was on to her, and told her that she had no cash on her except for the cash that she had for her own food - which was basically just enough. So after a while, the freeloading loady asks to borrow a CHECK! WOW. I'm just so blown away by that... She asked the other co-worker for a check for something that cost like about $8.00+. When they were telling me this, I was just BLOWN away. I don't ever remember anyone doing that to me, and if someone tried...then whateva!
Is that not weird? So the freeloader isn't in the office today, and everyone is talking about her. My thing, which I had asked them, was WHY would you go out IF you don't have any money? If you don't have money, but got asked to go out, then stay your a$$ in the office. You know what I mean? Or bring your own food. If you don't have money, then that should tell you something: either you ain't makin' enough, or it's going to something not worth going to. So work overtime, or get a 2nd job to keep up. Every working mutha f*cka needs to have some cheddah in their pockets no matter what. Whether it be $8.00 or $80.00. You gotta have SOMEthing. Hello! You work!! And if you have to stoop so low as to borrow a check from a co-worker for an amount that's like under $10.00?! LORD HAVE MERCY ON YOUR SOUL. That's a dreadful SHAME. It's flat-out ghetto and tasteless. Dire emergencies are one thing, but as a habitual ocurrence? I don't know. After hearing about this, I am totally out of respect for this girl. She comes off as nice and very cool and all, but with all that stinkiness? I'm sorry. That's just trife.
I don't know. I guess some people just don't get out much. They sit there and perpetrate like they're this way, but in reality they're another way. I mean, we shall love you regardless, but c'mon now! Don't pull that cheap-skate ish! Do NOT pull it! And be comfortable with being YOU. If goin' out to places that the others go out to ain't your thang, then just don't GO! Wow... and this happens within my office? Pathetic, I tell you. Pathetic.
So yeah. It's been hot-a$$ these past few days. Thank goodness it hasn't been so humid at night. That's the worst. Not being able to sleep comfortably in the summertime is like one of the worst things imaginable. It's the total on-set of sweaty, restless INSOMNIA. And we do NOT like that now, do we?! Oh hellz nah... I just don't do well with heat. Speaking of which, I really need to find me some summer office gear. I need to sport some outfits for the opicina. And I'm not talkin' about that sweatery shit that you find at Banana. I'm sorry, not to go off on a tangent or anything, but Banana Republic has been totally slackin' with their season's new diggs. Their stuff screams "been there; done that..." and I swear I had most of those shirts and pants in different colors and patterns like back when I was in college. You know what I mean? It's getting really annoying. And if you know me well, I'm not one to sport a button-up shirt with a tie in the office. If I don't have to sport that, then I won't. I'm more of the "urban-slash-office-chic." Do you know what I'm talking about?!
Heat. Heat-bearable clothing. What else to discuss? Hey, gotta run and move my car real quick...then I have a dumb-a$$ staff meeting. So I'll continue this in a moment. So hang on real quick...
OK - so the meeting is being pushed back a bit. One of the people who's s'posed to be here isn't quite here just yet. Anyway. OH, I watched Josie and the Pussycats last night. I've never really seen it before. Actually, I have, but I never actually paid much attention to it. For some reason I could never get into it, so I never knew the real gist of the story. When I saw it last night, and actually paid attention to it, I was pretty much amazed at how the movie made pop culture seem so "created." Notice I said "creatED" and not "creatIVE." You'd think that trends come and go by whomever and whatever, but the movie made it seem like these things are passed along through subliminal messages found in music. In a way it's so true, although not in that turn-all-kids-into-drones" type of way. For instance - remember when "Bling-bling..." came out, then all of a sudden people were all about "blingin'. Or when J.Lo came out wearin' those capri-style pants that tied-up at the bottom in one of her videos ---all of a sudden those pants are EVERYwhere. Or after Trenyce on American Idol sported those Timberland-lookin' Steve Madden boots, all of a sudden you'd see them all over the malls (or all over ladies' feet - esp. in LA). And who can ever forget the movie, Clueless?! "WHAT-EVER!" "AS IF!" So yeah. The whole pop-culture thing is just amazing.
I know that the way the movie portrayed it was totally fake. I mean come on. Parker Posey?! OK, besides the fact that I think she acts the same in everything she does (she's the female answer to leo dicaprio, keanu reeves, and chris klein), her character was just too much. If anyone was actually like that in the business, then I'm sure her a$$ would be kicked like every other day. But yeah - the portrayal was totally over-exaggerated. But all for the purpose of sheer entertainment I guess. But ANYWAY. I'm losing sight of the point here! OH, don't you find it absolutely unbelievable like when you actually come up with a phrase or saying that totally is used to describe something, then all of a sudden it just gets picked-up and everyone around you starts to use it?! OR if you make-up or coin a phrase BEFORE you hear it on a movie, TV show, or song?! That's happened to me several times actually. I think it's totally cool. It makes me think that I'm trendy enough to start "trends." AHAHAH... One of my friends told me once that I was a "trend-setter..." Which is cool. Not that I live by trends, but I tend to create them. I just go with the flow, and I'm not at all into conformity. WEN?! COMFORMIST?! Please. Anyway. So yeah, I think it's actually fun to come-up with sayings and phrases that actually get used as part of today's ever-evolving POP CULTURE. Distinguishing something as being hena and/or hot is definitely a FUN thing to do. AHAHAH!
OK, so they're quickly playin' out my song. Lil' Kim's The Jump-Off is officially being over-played by the lame-a$$ POP station. I swear. Pop stations try so hard to have flayva that they play-out every single R&B or rap song until it gets worn-out.
But worst of all?! I was at TJ Maxx yesterday when I heard them play At Last over the music... or MUSAK. I was all excited cause I thought that it was Etta James's version. BUT lo and behold it was Celine Dion. I'm sorry. But after hearing that version, I am inclined to hate Celine Dion even more now than I have ever before. OK, don't get me wrong. I think that the woman can sing. She's blessed with an amazing voice. But at the same time, she takes these songs (old and new alike) and totally Celine-izes them. I'm all for making something your own, but her style is almost drone-like. It's like she's this robot, and everything she touches is ruined. She has a great voice, and has some great songs also... but on a whole, she's just annoying. She's a sleeper, and I refuse to buy any of her CDs ever again. I only bought two of her CDs in my LIFE. I bought some old CD that had her first US releases, which has some really great ballads. Then I bought the one with the Titanic theme, and luckily I sent that one to the Philippines. OH, I lied. I actually bought another two CDs. One of them was one that had a bunch of songs. Great, I actually bought like 5 Celine CDs total. I got the one with Power of Love, then I got some other one... then I got her Christmas album. I'm irked by the fact that I just admitted that I've bought her CDs before. It's totally unMANly. I'm embarrassed. Crap, I think I even have one other Celine CD. Oh well. All I know is that I definitely do NOT buy her stuff ANYmore. I refuse. And now she has a Vegas show which practically means that you've come to a veritable end of a part of your career that was once very illustrious. Let's just put Celine Dion to rest... She came, she conquered, and she definitely don't need to come back. Is it lunch time yet?