delete, delete, delete...
Oh, how nice. I just accessed my e-mail file and someone I don't even
know has sent me some "Helpful Ideas to Share." Really, it says so right
in the e-mail subject line: "Helpful Ideas to Share." Now, "MVowell9," the sender,
is not immediately familiar to me, but if he/she wants to talk stain removal
or mildewy grout or a how to fix a wholesome breakfast in five minutes, why, I'm
all ears. So, let's see what sort of "Helpful Hints" MVowell9 has to offer.
Maybe we can trade spaghetti recipes -- oh, dear...It seems MVowell9
wants to know -- in lurid blue letters on a neon yellow background --
"How do you like your breasts ...?" and, well, it goes on from there. "Just click here," the script invites, and I'll see all I want.... needless to say, they're
not talking Colonel Sanders, here. Okay, so maybe I had an idea
what I'd find when I investigated these "helpful hints." I'm pretty wise
to the porn-meisters' ploys these days -- after all, they literally inundate me,
sometimes four or five or six offerings per "new mail" screen: But you have
to give them credit with their cleverly disguised ploys to entice us to open their mail...subject lines such as -- "The Latest News from Back Home" or
"To My Old High School Pal" -- or "Helpful Hints to Share" -- or "Here is my
new screen name".... etc. One of my favorites is when they get personal with me....
it cracks me up...."Kim, grow your penis safely and naturally" The way the
subject is worded, it sounds like I could manufacture my own penis...
you know, grow one in a jar...kinda like Sea Monkeys. Fill a container with
water, pour in the penis powder, stir, and watch the magic happen. I could keep
it on my nightstand next to the alarm clock. Bring it out on special occasions.
Even dress it up in various holiday inspired costumes.
Oh, then there is the ... "Kim, give your women multiple, irresistible orgasms". Well, dang it, I don't have a woman...but of course, if I had one, pleasing her would be no problem thanks to my new petrie dish penis that I conveniently manufactured
and grew safely and naturally.
My "delete" finger is getting numb!!
until next time
- Kim Gallagher-
