Letters
"Leave me alone, go away, just leave me" Matt swayed backwards and forwards repeating what he was saying. His eyes were cold and emotionless, his body tense. He wrapped his arms around himself and started shaking like a leaf. He was frightened. Frightened of life.
"Matt?" A nurse gently placed a hand on his shoulder. �You have a visitor Matt. James is here to see you, I'm just going to get him" Matt didn't look up; he clenched his hands together, and closed his eyes. He just wanted to disappear, he wanted to vanish into thin air, yet people kept rescuing him.
�Hey Matt� James nervously said. James went to sit in front of Matt, forcing himself to smile. Yet how was he to smile, when his best friend had given up on everything? James placed his hand in his pocket, and reached for a small object. He opened up his hand to reveal an envelope. �A young girl told me to give you this� He handed Matt the letter. �I think she is in the room at the end.� He paused. �The girl was sweet; I think she was a fan.� Matt lifted his head, his lip trembled, and he didn�t want to think about the past, about the time when he was happy. He was foolish then, he believed that he would be happy forever, yet it all came to an end.
�James, please don�t leave me here, they want to hurt me, they will kill me� he cried. James shook his head and a tear leaked from his eye and rolled down his cheek,
�Matt they are only trying to help you, you�re the only person hurting you.�
with that James stood up to leave, unable to cope with Matt pleading him to help him, when he couldn�t. The letter lay on the floor.
�Jess!� the same cheerful nurse who had just seen Matt, entered the room. Jess� room was covered in Busted merchandise, and posters. It made her feel safe.
�Matt. How is he? He is ok isn�t he? He is, he has to be� she stumbled over her words, while digging her finger nails into her skin.
� He is doing well Jess� she said, yet Jess knew that the nurse was lying. Jess started to scrape her nails over her wrists, over old cuts, causing blood to run freely.
The nurse turned around from what she was doing, and quickly went over to Jess� side. �Oh Jess� she sighed, and pulled her into a hug. The nurse then went to collect some bandages, leaving Jess in a dazed state.
�I didn�t mean to..I..I�� she stumbled, as the nurse came back into the room. �He can�t leave me again� Jess sobbed. Her eyes were as red as the leaking blood, as the tears continued to run rivers down her cheeks.
Matt stared at the letter in his hands. Should he read it? Should he throw it away? Millions of thoughts went through his head. �Noo, noooo, noooo� he called out into the empty room. He covered his ears trying to shut out the world. He finally went to sleep, yet he wasn�t free from his demons even in his dreams. He woke to find the letter scrunched up in his hand, he opened it, and read it.
Jess silently walked to the room she knew belonged to Matt. She couldn�t sleep, which wasn�t unusual, and she wanted to be close to Matt. She wondered if he had read her letter. She had been told by her doctor, to write everything she felt inside, down on a piece of paper, and show it to somebody she trusted. At first she wasn�t sure whether to show it to James or Matt; she trusted them both with her life. She hadn�t even met Matt, and had only met James that one time when she asked him to deliver the letter. But she loved them with her whole heart.
In the end she decided that Matt would understand her more, and felt he could benefit from it more.
She carried on walking, when she suddenly couldn�t breathe. It felt like a rope was around her neck, being pulled tighter and tighter, she tried to call out, but was unable to make a sound. She managed to go to Matt�s room, tripping and falling as she went. She pushed open his door, and blacked out at the image before her. The image was of Matt, hanging from the roof, with a rope around his neck. There was a letter beside him, addressed to Jess. She later read it to find he had killed himself, because he didn�t want to hurt her anymore. He thought if he was dead, he couldn�t cause her anymore pain. How wrong was he?
A year later, on the same day, of the same month, that Matt ended his life. Jess hanged herself with a rope. She wrote two letters. The first one read, Dear Matt, now we can be together forever. We will never be apart again. I love you, Jess x. The second one was longer, it was for James, telling him how she loved him, and how he had Kara, yet Matt had no one. Matt needed her more.