I Miss You
To see you, when I wake up is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do is a three-fold utopian dream.
My eyes open and immediately see you. Your there, head resting on the pillow next to mine, eyes shut in sleep, a contented smile curving your lips. Your dark hair is partially covering your eyes and has reverted back to its natural slight curls. I smile as I look at you, hardly daring to believe it's real. You'd think after a month I would be used to it but every morning I wake up with you sleeping next to me it doesn't feel real. After months of watching you from a distance, sneaking quick glances of you as you slept in your bunk of the tour bus, never thinking you could ever possibly want me your here in my bed, next to me. As I watch you your eyes open to look at me, I gently reach a hand across and brush away the hair that covers your eyes, allowing you to see and you smile at me. I get lost looking into your eyes and the most unbelievable thing about all of this is that all I can find in them is love. I never thought you'd love me back, I didn't think it was possible. You reach out a hand and at the same time turn onto your side so your facing me and your hand hooks around the back of my head, pulling my face closer to yours, allowing your lips to lightly brush with mine before deepening it into a meaningful, loving kiss. I melt into it, succumbing to you completely. You pull away and whisper the three words that I can never hear enough from you. They still don't make it seem any more real, in fact they make it harder to believe, how someone like you could love me.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said, I miss you.(?)
I see your picture, I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine.
I snap awake and look to your side of the bed. It's cold and unslept in with no sign of you. I flop back and close my eyes again, willing the tears that are threatening to fall to just go away. Opening my eyes again I roll onto my side so my back is to the space you normally occupy. I look at the framed picture that sits on my bedside table. In the picture your laughing, your whole face lit up, you head slightly tipped back, your arms crossed over your stomach trying to hold yourself together before you collapsed into hysterics. I reach out and take hold of the frame, pulling it closer to me and running the pad of my thumb over your face. So beautiful. I put the picture back down, unable to look at your face and know your not here to see in real life. I long to see you, to touch you, to have you envelop me in the warmth, security and love that only you can do. I roll over again and bury my face into your cold pillow. I take a deep breath in, inhaling all that there is of your scent remaining there. I close my eyes as it engulfs me and sigh. No one else has ever had this effect on me, I have never cared so much for someone that I could be found trying to find comfort in another persons pillow but I am. I wish you were here now with me, I really do. I think I miss you, in fact I know that I miss you.
You have only been gone ten days, but already I'm wastin away.
I know I'll see you again whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care and I miss you.
You left, leaving me on my own, saying you didn't know when you'd be back. You promised me you'd come back though. You said you'd ring me and you loved me and that you would be back. That was ten days ago and I haven't heard from you yet. I've stayed in bed, the last place we were together. Your pillow is loosing your scent now though but I still can't bare to move. I don't function without you. There's no reason for me to get up. Normally I get up because you have and I don't want to be apart from you, either that or you've forced me to get up so we can do something. We're already apart now though so there's no reason for me to get up, I don't have to be anywhere. I wish I knew where you were or why you went. You didn't say how long you'd be gone for but you did promise you'd be back so I know you will be. You always keep your promises. I want to ring you, but I can't as you said you'd ring me so I just have to wait. I want to tell you that I miss you, so that you know, so you'll come back to me. I just want you to know that I do care. I miss you, I really do.