Enthusiasm...
         emotions lost
Enthusiasm is a word that I believe was created when someone had too many emotions all at once, and needed to categorize it.  Enthusiasm is not it's own feeling, but rather the combination of excitement, anticipation and perhaps motivation.  We also cannot experience enthusiasm without some hope thrown into the mix. 

So what makes me feel enthusiastic?  I don't know.  I honestly don't.  I try to pick and choose words to define my emotions carefull and cautiously, and therefore, don't know the last time I may have honestly felt that jumble of emotions that is enthusiasm.

I anticipate many things.  I grow excited about people and experiences. And I hope for even more. 
Deception...the attraction and failure
As hope is the motivator of Enthusiasm, so fear is to Deception.  That element of being unsure, off balance, and not willing to committ wholely...that inspires deception.  When we must feel the need to protect ourselves (and sometime others) from the truth, be it whole or part, we are deceptive. 

While people on a whole tend to feel the need to "protect" ourselves and others with the bluntness of honesty, I believe that is one of the greatest failures.  And to live life being deceptive to your own self, your whole being...it is a great indecency. 

As a spy must decieve to gather information, there is someone to whom he is given said information, and being honest to.  And while I find James Bond exciting...it is not how I'd wish to spend my life.  Because eventually you lose focus of whom you are helping, and whom you are decieving.
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