September 30, 2004; 5:30pm, tidy Thursday

_DAMN I'M RICH!!!!!! AND OBVIOUSLY I'M LOVING IT!!!!!! ive got a leather wallet (ever since at least a month ago), officially have my own pair of formal dress shoes AKA tap dance shoes (which i bought from Payless today; it cost me $38!!!!), and my parents have these 3 leather couches i can snooze on anytime i want; those couches were purchased oh i dunno.. last year? Who knows. But all these authentic, genuine leather products... these black, rich, smooth materials.... OH MAN... unfortunate people don't know how obsessed they can get until they FINALLY get rich or got some super wealthy possessions. well yesterday at the Cabaret meeting (not practice or rehearsal), Stacy Ardelean, a decent musical director, and all the people who attended the meeting including me... we all decided on BATBOY. Its Batboy the comedic musical, ya hear me?!!?! Batboy is about a vampire boy who's a disgrace to society. Society won't accept him for who he is because he's really different from normal people. ANTHONY VEGA came by yesterday a bit later in the Cabaret meeting... missed that guy. We shook hands and i found out from him he might be in the Cabaret this year too!!! im planning on doing a solo number in the Cabaret... Smile by Charlie Chaplin. Chaplin, old buddy ole relative good pal... (actually he's not my relative or pal, but he's been a great role model of mine ever since i've heard of him a loooooong time ago). Sooooo there turns out to be an event on saturday. Or sunday. OR BOTH days, since Debbie didn't clearly answer when i asked her... its time for me to be super assertive as in an in charge sort of person. I CAN be if and WHEN i want to. But it really shows some "bad" natures of me i guess... not all people agree with the leader. I also saw this article in SL Times... it struck a cord in my soul... "A person who knows what to say can change the world."_

October 1, 2004; 10pm, fired up Friday

_I CREATED A XANGA I STARTED A XANGA finally!!!!!!! im really unsure why.. maybe its due to a number of reasons, but hey- i started it yesterday!!!!! tomorrow im going to Oakland Square basketball courts... it's the only nearby place where i can bball with people... and relax a bit. Mashed potatoes and gravy and PB&J sandwiches; i miss those old fashioned foods so much. my geocities site has become a huge place of extreme sloppiness... because it really is difficult to contain and handle. ALSO, this site has decreased in the number of visitors and readers!!!! =_= so Xanga's got a rep for something against that... and Xanga's so much more social. owell. MIZ FOSTER WAS STRAIGHT UP TRYING TO RAP TODAY IN CLASS!!!!!! AND SHE CAN SHAKE AND DANCE A LITTLE BIT TOO!!!!!!!! CHARLES WAS SO LAUGHING TODAY....

OK OK from this point on im not putting whatever time i editted one day's stuff. "I've learned an important lesson through my whole life- hair can make or break your image, dude." i just read some HILARIOUS shit on pickup lines... man oh MAN some of them are sure to get guys slapped or w/e. anyway i just want to post for the record that there are more lefties i know in the world than i recently thought i did... and some are really full of talent or intelligence... like Frank Ho, Stella Lee, my brother, and Mister Glover. man. thats crazyyy.. nuff said. Goodnight._

October 2, 2004; 10:30pm, sappy Saturday

_HEYYY i finally got some grand beauty sleep- 10.5 hrs of it last night!!!!!! NBA Live 05 FINALLY CAME OUT THIS WEDNESDAY AND I DIDN'T KNOW?! ^_^ IM GETTING IT!! this morning while i was eating 2 peanut butter sandwiches (which i havent done in quite awhile), i noticed there were 16 grams of fat in just 2 tbspns of peanut butter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >=- ( anyway foods like milk, PB, eggs, and similar varieties of food WILL have profound effects on one's body unless one is EXTREMELY prudent in his/her diet. What i really mean is that foods that belong in meat and diary products section of the Food Pyramid are such a no no limit that... that it even scares me a bit sometimes. Besides, PB and cheese and milk and yogurt are ALL made of fungus or bacteria or BOTH... isnt that sickening? But they say some bacteria and fungus is good for u. SSOOoo Mr G Love AKA mister Glover is teaching a whole buncha vocal techniques that smooth out voices. Ive been practicing many of them everyday and man oh MAN i feel the dreadfully glorious effects!!! my bad to leave u, but now i must._

October 4, 2004; 7:30pm, merry Monday

_my bad for forgetting to notify u readers of my Xanga site; it's www.xanga.com/stories_to_tell. I GOT NBA LIVE 05 yesterday AND DAMN! its HELLA FUN!!!!!! there's definitely much more graphic improvement, defensive improvement, and the offense... is sorta awkward to run. the music soundtracks are pretttttttty darn catchy...TOM came yesterday and helped fix the printer (which is still hella fulla crap)& my AIM, which was being blocked by ZoneAlarm firewall which i was obviously unaware of. BOOYEAH.

I ALMOST FORGOT!!! COMICAL CONVERSATIONS IN NOTABLES TODAYYY... SAMANTHA! ~.~

Daniel: Get this (Charles) weirdo away from me!

Charles: (raises eyebrow while acting super insane)

__________________________________________________________________________

Daniel: (to Samantha and Laura) You know some people's ears don't connect to their head? See? Charles's is like that. And he even said something about wanting to skin me alive.

Charles: (in a madman tone) I didn't say that!!!

Samantha: Did you know you're really funny, Charles? (sob sob sob she's... that's.. AHHHHHHHHHHH the way she stared back at me with those catty eyed marbles... I ALMOST DIED RIGHT THERE... but COURAGE pulled Charles thru)

Charles: (in a deliriously hilarious tone) I AM???

Samantha: (completely busts out laughing)

Daniel: I've never heard Samantha cackle so much like an old lady.

Charles: (stares speechlessly back and forth at Daniel and Samantha all the while with elated expression) *all this time Samantha's still laughing*

OK. so. anyway. people really do find me too funny at almost every corner they turn, especially when im not quiet. i love watchin people sleep... laugh, be merry... and all those loverly values... ohhh my heart. THERE it gooooooessss.... ahahahahhahahhahahhahaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!_

October 6, 2004; 4pm, wise Wednesday

_So there's Cabaret Practice tonight. 6pm-8:30pm... NBA LIVE 2005 is the most COMICAL, BEST BASKETBALL GAME IVE EVER HAD!!! and SLHS finally installed some new basketball courts... i gotta commend SLHS at least a tad bit... cuz they renovated and renewed so many things on the campus. LOVERLY._

October 13, 2004; 8:30pm, WHICH Wednesday?

WHOA. i just stared a bit unknowingly and tried to make it subtle... because... as she breathed, it reminded me of the ocean waves... ohhhh how romantic!! i sit behind her as i said b4 in my posts and i have such a spectacular view of her celestial figure..... my voice is sincerely DRIPPING with loverliness!!!! as she lets her brunette hair framed head rest gently against her chair, i sorrrrrta glimpse at her left shoulder white bra strap. then i drive my gaaaaaaze ohhhhh so little to her black t shirt... she was wearing full scarlet today... RED FOR LOOOOOOOVE!!!!!!! she's.... oh id die for her. when she gets a husband one day, he'll be a luckyass man fucking damnit. ~,~

Deb, as in Deborah Susan Young... she's... she's starting to terrify me. she's a loverly person, BUT she wanted to help me organize my binder, hole punch my papers, and "neaten my stuff" yesterday. then today she spared me some lined paper. Ms Levy, my psyche teacher, is planning on psychoanalyzing her students... including me... pray for the best. Does anyone else feel like this site's withering to nothingness??? MAKE A JOYFUL NOISE MY SOULLLLLLLL!!!_

October 20, 2004; 10pm, WHY Wednesday?

October 24, 2004; 1pm, smart, sworn Sunday

A gloomy, sprinkling day it is- gray clouds dampen not only the sun, but people's souls as well. A single loner with depressed eyes observes the very solidity of the foundation around him. Evergreen trees, luscious grass, the seagulls frolicking in the waters. A mini waterfall splashes onto a little pool... a pool filled with a wishful collection of coins. The loner decides to add to the collection, but hesitates- screw it, he thinks. He believes not in this whole view of superstitiousness.

(later...) A dangling, mesmerizing black backpack zipper is seen. The loner stares for a bit, not wincing even once. It is the backpack of a Caucasian girl with splashes of crimson color on her cheeks. Her name is Cassie, and she has dirty blonde hair. Her backpack zippers are in the exact format as the loner's- only one of the zipper locks has no strap on it.

(in an illuminated room) Now he's watching her sleep... peacefully... so daintily, even. But somehow, as he peers at her dreamy form... breathing in, breathing out, breathing in, breathing out... she reminds him of how Samantha breathed. For both of their breathing forms were strong.

October 26, 2004; 5pm, twice Tuesday

Charles: (says some odd jokes)

Daniel: (laffs hysterically) Oh Charles, you crack me up!

Charles: ^_^

___________________________

Daniel: You have good tone quality.

Charles: whaaat...?

Daniel: (speaking of my vocal talents) Charles, I'm saying that even though you never took voice lessons you still sound pretty good._

October 28, 2004; 7pm, THE Thursday

sometimes its small things like that... she high fived with me once about something involving comical stuff... GODAMIT!!! one of these dayssssss... im going to KILL her... inside my heart... O_o

November 17, 2004; 11pm, weirdly wasted Wednesday

_Samantha (on Saturday Cabaret night): High five, Charles!!!

of course, i high five her... mostly because i had the most intense solo outta EVERYBODY there!!!! HAH!!! now WHAT, u fake singers!!! im the most dynamic, active, expressive actor AND singer that SLHS has ever had in A LOOOONG ass while, take THAT!! melissa's the loudest though... her volume is DEFINITELY what theatre needs at SLHS. AND... Pinkyswear finally convinced me to hug her back. but it was a meek hug... one of tehse days ima probably attempt to hug the stuffing outta her, ill show heeeeerrrrrr.

Charles is about 40 feet behind her in the shifting crowd. He spots a figured dressed in all blue, and her brunette hair is flowing like moving waters. Samantha Nicole Stettler, he repeated mentally in his mind for about the 500th time since he knew her full name. He ponders about going after her and conversing with her on the way to Notables, that dreadfully bittersweet class...

BUT ALAS!!! He has to make his bladder gladder first. Physical priorities sometimes, reader. Priorities, I tell you. So he smiles a holy smirk, so wonderfully pleasant the sight of Samantha is to his eyes... in the radiant sunlight. Tata and goodnight!_

November 18, 2004; 5pm, tainted Thursday

_sometime earlier this month...

Deborah: (persuading me to get up from my slumber) Wake up, sunshine...!
Charles:...!!!

Deb is plain scary sometimes... man, im so afraid of gals. GEEZ..!!! ~_~

and then Max Broad was conversing with me about some nauseous issues... like how he was chatting with Samantha yesterday.

Max: So yesterday i was speaking to sam about you, charles.
Charles: (flustered; gradually more irritated... stuttering between words) What did she say...?! (ultra suspicious look)
Max: Nothing... she just told me about you being able to sing lowest in Notables.
Charles: Whaaaaaaaat.....?! Did she say anything else??
Max: Yeah, she said you had a nice voice.

I think many people are catching on to veerrrrry secret things. owell, let em then... i can retaliate. I mean deal with it. ARGH... im gonna eat a turkey today cuz mom bought two 16 lb turkeys yesterday and we're gonna eat one early today. LATER, alligator!_

November 27, 2004; 10:30am, stupid Saturday

_ALCOHOL's become my "friend"!!! Pros: fights acne, sterilization. Cons: Stings, foul odor, super strong, causes dryness.

Today im gonna go watch "Alexander The Great" at Century 16 in Bayfair Mall. I'm not gonna be a century "virgin" anymore, HAHA!_

December 3, 2004; 9pm, flipped Friday

Since Wednesday, Ms Levy constantly praises my worthy OCD 8 page essay I wrote. She's overtly flattering... she adds that she loves it so much that she's keeping mine out of everyone else's to read it several times over. ^_____^ yeah, i know. I put a lotta time into it.

it's finally winter. so yesterday laura and i were walking down the SLHS driveway... and we conversate, of course. after fidgeting and turning away a couple of times, i suddenly bust out saying she has a really mellifluous quality. she replies that she doesnt really understand. so i stutter a little more and turn a bit red and say she has really mellifluous... vocals. she should sing out more. really!

she says with so much energy, "you're so nice, Charles!!!"

and then. we depart... and the world is black once again._

December 12, 2004; 4pm, surefire Sunday

_I'd like to speak about what happened on WEDNESDAY: Laura Chew kept saying she missed me greatly... she's too good for me. And then at night right when i entered the gym for the winter concert performance, she greeted me with a �Hello Charles, my sentimental friend!!!� i almost pissed in my tux. PFFFFFFT shit FUCK FUC KFUCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!! PLEASE, don't even start. At lunch while I was playing CounterStrike, I was doing really good, especially since I was killing people on the whim... that's why Ivan and Tao began saying stuff like �Charles got skills.� I don't just have skills in playing computer games, peoples. You get the pic. Samantha's such a boooooo fucking hoo lost cause. Somewhere along the lines of November, I finally realized it. We can possibly stay friends, but even that'd be weird. It's not just because we're so different of character... it's also because of our �pathetic past we never had.� Funny how life screws you over, eh?_

December 13, 2004; 10:30pm, maudlin Monday

_Duy Tran's still fixated on that solo I performed. "On The Street Where You Live." I loved my performance as well, but JEEZ LOUIIIZE.. Duy man...!! asking me if he could borrow that song on my CD nowadays. ALSO, my throat is hellllla raw and sore, but specifically my tonsils.... *shudder*... the PAIN!!! At Notables Duy said that he'd rather not walk some short distance to the school (even tho he lives hella near SLHS). Tony began criticizing him about how lazy and weak he is and compared him to me; how strong i am... im just too flattered..!!!!!!! PEople began chiming in about how dedicated and commendable i was to run all the way to Burrell Field from SLHS. They're all saying it's so wonderful and all that LOVERLY stuffs and im all....... SHOCKED AND SURPRISED AND ALL I DO IS TRY TO PUT ON A MODEST EXPRESSION!!! but then samantha and daniel start snapping for me (they snapped instead of clapping) and samantha snapped the longest.... thank you for applauding my super self!!!!!!!!! (takes a bow)..... then in advanced algebra Ms Foster begins telling her stories once again...! what deja vu it is if u associate it with my Xanga site... O_O" this weird asian guy said im smart so i shouldnt worry about this homework i had. and THEN ms foster says "That gentleman got a perfect on his test!" so she pointed at me..... me me meeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! such WONDERFUL TIMES IN DECEMBER!its no wonder why winter's my fave season... and december's probably gonna end up being my favorite month..!!!!!!!!!!! Ms foster also said "I came here to be free." I understand that. My parents did the same thing... Foster also said we should use our wonderful opportunities NOW. sieze the moment... cuz if you go to other places outside of USA, it aint as comfy and nice. nuff said, NIGHT._

December 16, 2004; 5:30pm, totally Thursday

_Yesterday was such a garrulous, loverly time. The last Winter Concert, held at Ohlone College, in Fremont, was in a big theater. It reverberated sound quite effectively, which resulted in awe inspiring effects. So when the concert was over and everyone's resting, Samantha turns and looks at me...

Samantha: �Hey Charles.�
I swivel around slowly...
Samantha: �What are you doing?�
�Nothing. Just sitting here, relaxing. What are you doing?�
Then she walks all the way around the theater seats to stand a bit northeast of where I'm stitting. She stands there... and I feel helpless and so damn scared.... oh god... *shiver*.
However, I maintain my shaky mien as �always�, hahha!!

Samantha: �I've come over to visit you, Charles.�
Charles (in a slightly depressing tone): �Well that's a first...�
Samantha: �What are you saying, Charles? I always visit you...�
Charles (now feeling miserable; I meant she's never ever conversated with me 1 on 1): Nvm nvm... I'm just sleepy.
Samantha: Me too. How's everything going?
Charles: Mmm... hectic and a bit rushed. How about you?
Samantha: Yeah, a little of that too.
Charles: So how do you like Notables so far?
Samantha: It's OK.

Today Samantha said hi to me twice... I happened to encounter her before school started in the hallway. She's wearing a gray sweater and black jeans, looking casual but exciting nonetheless. That girl always captivates my fucking ass, i swearr.. and then in Notables she says �hi, charles� again!!! WOW, just WOWW!!! I thought we were through as in �we had a relationship that never even started and now you're a fag� through. But as Max said, �Sam's a sound person.� Agreed, Max Broad.

Daniel: I can't go to caroling practice today...
Charles (in a really goofy tone and expression): Then you should tell him.
Samantha (staring at me): You're funny, Charles.
Charles: (stares back and tries hard not to act maudlin)

*sigh*... now I love her more again.. she's put new faith back into my love for her.......!!!!

In fourth period today I joked about not doing the Talent Show for AP English4. People who know me enough should always know I joke and lie a lot, but Debbie really came outta her skin today.

Charles: I'm not singing! I'm not doing the talent show tomorrow! (and THEN she really shines on me with her wide smile, full of braces; her eyes full of love and innocence... that puppy dog face... awwww I was just cringing and dyin when she spoke to me like that!!!!!)
Deb (puts on a cheerful, enticing grin): But you have to, Charles!!!! I'm only going to school tomorrow to hear you sing!!!!!!

Yeah.... u get the pic. My, I'm surrounded my such wonderful peoples!!!!! *sniffffff*

In ap english4, ms duffey tells me some UNBELIEVEABLE news...... aye caramba!! She reports to me that these 2 girls came in her class after school telling her how wonderful I am. She said they even expressed how much they loved me. i immediately asked her to identify who they were... but she couldnt remember...... ARGHHHKJF;KASD0FJLKVMLKMVAVMALVMALVAVMAVMAVN;ALVNLTOO!

Talent Show began today actually in AP english4, and it was horrendous!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy heaven only 4 groups went, but they were scrumptiously marveeeeeloussss!!!!! Oye there, matey! One group supposedly made chocolate frosted vanilla flavored muffins and all chocolate muffins, which was a delightful dessert. Then Patrick's group made sausage fried rice straight up in class!!!! They were cooking over an electric pan and man, that food wasn't so bad. But while they were cooking, Andrew and Richard stringed guitars and they sorta sang along with the music. It was a hilarious show, I MUST ssaay!! To end it all, Max showed a short clip his group made in Video Production class. And to MY GREAT SURPRISE... SAMANTHA STETTLER's the MAIN CHARACTER IN IT!!! OMG OMG OMFGGGGG!!!! i nearly jumped outta my seat and busted a cap right thurr!1!1!11!!!! jeeeeeeeeeesus christ save me now......! so *ahem* back to what i was saying... it was a horror movie and samantha was acting out a role of a freaked out, suspicious woman.

February 16, 2004; 7pm, where Wednesday

_it's been 2 months since i last updated here. it's been a WHOLE HELLOF A FUN, overjoyed 2 months though!!

today Choir and Notables, directed by no one other than Mr Glover, went on one of the most amazing field trips- we went to watch the opera movie in Union City Theatres, The Phantom Of The Opera. It was a great movie, but it was almost impossible to ignore the slooping and sliding the singers did. That ruined the whole song..... ive heard of "connect ur words when ur singing", but c'mon- sliding the words together is just cutting "TOO much hair off".

so a few student's parents drove us to Union City, and there, we watched the movie from around 1:20pm to 3:50pm. It was so romantic and... omg i cried.

I almost straight out bawled and let it all flood out like a damn stinking tsunami!!!!! arrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! damnnnnnnnnnnit man .... luckily, it was near the end, with about 10 minutes left. but those 10 minutes seemed like an eternity.

I began to feel a little bit of wetness in my right eye and suddenly i distinctively knew i was weeping. it came as a terrifyingly emotional surprise, since i was 100% sure i was the only one crying. i was crying silently, just letting the tears flow slowly down my cheek. it was dark as night in the theatre LUCKILY, so the girl sitting next to me didnt notice (I Think) or anyone else. i was in the front row, and there wasnt anybody sitting to the left of me. IMMEDIATELY after the movie ended, i popped outta my seat and nearly jumped down the flight of stairs in the huge theater... to wipe my teary eyes in the restroom.

It felt really good too....... REALLY damn good.... its been sooooooo long since ive cried about a romantic movie. or anything romantic, in that matter.

Love doesn't have an age limit.

im graduating soon and kneww soooooooo, soooooo many more new people this year than ever b4..... and... so many novel experiences!!!!! i LOVE NOTABLES SO FUCKKKKKKKING MUCH WITH ALL THOSE FIELD TRIPS AND WHAT WE SING. EVEN THE FOREIGN LANGUAGE SONGS AND THE ACAPELLA ONES....... its perhaps the longest, most fun experience ive ever had. I LOVE SINGING!!!!!! foreeverrrrrrrrr!!! and dont forget music!

I have a profound SOLO in Notables this year!!!! it's in the song "Music Of The Night", a # from The Phantom Of The Opera. it's a high song in the treble tenor clef.

Veronica Buhler likes me. Laura reaaaaly likes me. The devil's cursed me with this infectious sensitivity + sentimentality...... gosh... i may be ridiculously childish alot, but COMON!!!!!! i notice everything.

I <3'd Samantha so much b4, but as time goes on, its hard to believe.... seriously....... but im dangerously falling in love with her even MORE!!!!!!

^_________^ so happy.

goodnight, people_

March 3, 2005; 12am, touchy Thursday

_So today a small group of Notables... around 10 people only, sang for a basketball game at SLHS. BOOYEAHHHHHH... the crowd went wild at the end of our song, The National Anthem. NIIIIICE.... i feel like my soul's so faraway right now._

April 17, 2005; 11:55pm, soothing Sunday

_Today was an exceptionally ecstatic day, but WORDS alone wont suffice to describe the immeasurable amount of unbridled joy I FEEL surge THROUGHOUT my SOUL!!!!!!! Much LOVE to Tom for his unforgettable help in buying me a comb... I really needed that! My hair's eating my face, which is far from nice.

ALSO, SAMANTHA... soon to be gone... *HUGE SOB* not just her either... these people in the musical have grown to be so loverly...!!!! But anyway Samantha said what I said in the program was sweet and/or nice of me. She called out "Charles," and I came over and she whispered that to me... all the while surrounded by many musical people in the SLHS backstage.

After the show went to Sizzlers!!!!!! and grubbed till i dropped!!! oh man.... ATE SO MUCH: SPAGHETTI, CANTELOUPE, FRUIT, ONION RINGS, FRIED BREAD SLICES, CHICKEN WINGS, PEACHES, AND AN OJ TO TOP IT. Bob the fisherman came along too, if I don't forget.

My pals who saw me perform loved it! Man, improvisation and creativity never worked so loverly... in fact, Bunte's returning for a 2nd show, LOL.... he loved it, he said. Hrmmm... i think im majoring in business or computer science @ SFSU. As long as it's reliably stable and decent and all that mumbo jumbo AND most importantly, BIG BUCKS. jobs these days... demand and supply... demand and supply, u all know._

April 18, 2005; 7:30pm, misty Monday

_Today right when lunch began Annie spotted me and I she caught up with me... and BEAR HUGGED me... gosh. She's been a wonder... *cry cry cry*... someday Im gonna remove my sensitivity circuits. Maybe... Mayybe NOT. Night all, and peace!_

May 20, 2005; 3:30pm, fervent Friday

_mmmmMmMmmMmMMMM... i think Polly Louie finally found out Im spying and stalking her so much.... she subscribed to me today at around midnight. geez.... im such a fool... hahhahha! a klutz who has a knack for wanting to know everything = a darn mishap. Im so saaaaaad..... sigh... everyone's together. Anna with her bf. the two lauras with theirs. samantha and peter. even daniel is liking Cat. HAHHHAHAHAHA... w/e. LONG LIVE SINGING._

June 18, 2005; 10pm, Saturday

_BITCHES! Bunte told me around the end of last month that he watched porn. He's perhaps the most blunt, forward, direct person I've ever known. AND on June 14, Class Of 2005 graduation date, he gave me back a dollar when he found it in his mom's car since I dropped it there. What a good pal (DESPITE his loud mouth, blatantly bad qualities). Life is still going slow for me. Like it ever won't? I like it at a downbeat pace. Few do, especially @ my age. I take everything extremely slow, and I've become notorious for that. Famous turtle, me I am. Conjunction junction... really, what's your function?_