| Kiley's Quit Smoking Diary |
| PREFACE: Ok, it's 9/23/02, and tomorrow is my QUIT DATE! I have to admit I'm a little scared, but I am going to Tinker Airforce base today at lunch to buy my patches to wear. I even found a coupon online for $3.00 off the box, so I am good to go! I know all this may seem silly to you all, but this is a good way for me to track how I am doing, and if I find some of the more vulnerable things that I may need to avoid. It may even inspire me more since it's a little work to keep up with all this......Who knows, all I know is that I really want to do this, and I really appreciate all the prayers and help you all are giving me........Don't forget to sign my guest book and let me know you've been here to see what I am doing..........any inspirational works or support will be cherished and appreciated.......THANKS EVERYONE! EMAIL me at [email protected] Day 1 - 9/24/02 12:05p, - Ok, it's lunch time, I've been sitting here munching on pretzels trying not to think about it. I posted a sign outside of my cube at work warning everyone that I may be a little grouchy but to "NOT ASK ME TO GO ON A SMOKE BREAK WITH THEM".........I took all of your emails and I cut them and pasted them all onto one page so I can look up and see how much everyone believes in me.......(and make me feel a little guilty every time I am tempted to cheat, hehe)......I called and cancelled all of my lunch appointments for this week so I wouldn't be stressed out about having to hurry or whatever....I am just going to spend my lunches this week to go tan, and run errands that I need to get done.......Get rid of some of the stress so I can move on......... ok, so now it's lunch time and I am going to go lay in the tanning bed and think about how bad I "don't want to smoke".......lol.....hopefully anyway.........Nah.....I'll be fine..........someone sent me something awesome this morning though, so I will share before I go: "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Phillipian 4:13 See ya'll later............. Day 2 - 9/25/02 Ok, so I have to catch you all up now, I missed yesterday because I turned my internet off at my house so I couldn't get to it..... (man I am getting rid of too many vices at the same time...lol) Ok, so Tuesday night went kinda crazy, I couldn't sit at home and jones for a smoke so I had to go SHOPPING>>>>>> Poor Brexton, I drug her all over the mall.... SO I bought some shoes and I WAS CURED! HEHE ! I have found the true cure to quit smoking!!!!!! I should sell this idea to all the "rich folk" out there and make enough money to keep buying shoes!!!!!!! OK, so I need to drop that one.....hahaha.........But anyway, the moral of the story is that I was fine Tuesday night......For Wednesday I decided that I had spent my maximum on shoes so I needed to find something else to do....LAUNDRY......Yeah! I'm washing everything, dirty or clean it's getting washed.......It smells like smoke (I never realized how gross I was) SO I have like 20 loads to do and that should keep me busy until the weekend when I have more painting and remodeling to do..... ALL IN ALL.........this too shall pass....... Day 3 - 9/26/02 Ok, today has been a bit harder.....Now that my lungs and brain are not all doped up on nicotine they are starting to realize that something is missing.......My brain is spinning because I'm trying so hard not to think about it, and my lungs are mad at me.......They have been making me HACK ALL DAY! Iguess they are trying to push out everything that was poisoning them! Who knows, but I sound like I'm about about to cough up every organ in my body. I know this is normal, and I kow it will only take a couple of days to get past so I'm gonna be strong....(I also planned some reinforcements, I made sure I ate fruit for breakfast and a chicken sandwich for lunch...I'm saving today's calories for all the chocolate I plan to consume.....just kidding......Maybe just a couple of pieces though? that wouldn't hurt anyone right?) I will again go on my LAUNDRY RAMPAGE tonight, and I have to go Wally World for a rent sign, so I will keep busy, and it will be just fine....... Keep up the prayers GUYS! It's helping........The thoughst are lessening every day........... October 1, 2002 - 1 Week Down! Ok, so I haven't written, so shoot me! LOL.....Just kidding, Andrew pointed it out to me that I may have been forgetting to write in this thing because I am not consumed with the desire to smoke as much.....Maybe he's right, or maybe I am just spacing it out, who knows...lol. The most important thing to remember is that it has now been 1 week since I smoked my last cigarette. YEAH! This patch is really helping alot, I must say...... I have a few cravings here and there (mostly in habitual places, like after I eat, or while I'm driving alone) but for the most part I have been ok with it. I haven't killed anyone, I haven't lost my mind, and I haven't gained 20 lbs yet. lol........SO I will keep updating every once in a while, and I will keep you up on my progress, but all in all, I am off to a great smoke-free start. Thanks guys! October 3, 2002 - What day is this? LOL! Well it is Thursday morning, and I have reached the 10 day mark since my last cigarette. For some reason this time was easier to quit (at least the first few days that is, don't hold me to anything I say, I'm crazy right now, lol.). In 1997 when I quit for so long I don't remember it being this easy. Maybe I want it more this time, or maybe I'm just more prepared with what I am trying to fight....who knows......I asked most of my friends that smoke not to do it around me at all this time around.......Most of them were very ok with that, some said that I needed to be able to be around it because I couldn't control that and I needed to be able to stay quit no matter what. I don't know about all that. It seems to me like this is an addiction like any other...... Would you take a friend who was a recovering alcoholic to a bar and tell him to order a coke? What do all of you think...... On any hand, I am doing ok, I haven't cheated once, and I am proud of that part.....The cravings are becoming less consistent. In some situations they are harder than others, but the frequency of them is lessening. I am using this patch religiously, I know I feel better in the morning and less in need of it, but I don't want to fail this time, so I'm gonna wear it whether I need it or not. Perhaps the placebo affect may be what I need to HOLD ONTO right now. I want to send out my sincerest thanks to all of you who have signed my guestbook and written your words of encouragement. I must say that when I sign on and see that I have new entries I have to put everything else aside so I can read them, they have been a tremendous help, and much appreciated. The prayers have obviosly been very effective, and I want you all to know what it means to me to be free of this albatross. Thank you again, and I love all of you! January 9, 2003 - Still Quit!!!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hey everybody, thank you so much for all your help, your support, and mostly for all of your parayers! Man, I must have gotten some serious prayer power out of all of you because here I am, Still Quit, and feeling better than I have in a very long time. Of course I gained the signature 10 pounds that everyone talks about, but now I am comfortable with the quit status and can begin to focus on losing the weight...... I want you all to know I could not have done this without you...........! |