Self-expiry date of friendship???

This is the only time when i will write my inner thoughts and feelings, yes it is the time of depression. I really don't know how to explain this anguish and disappointed feeling. I think the more exact word is betrayed. I don't know if everyone experienced this before. People, friends come and go so easily. When they need you, they will "stick" with you. When they don't, they will try ways and means to avoid you.  I don't need them to be a very good friend of mine, but I do appreciate if they treat me as a friend although they may not need my help anymore. I really dislike people who disappears into thin air when I need help or just plainly need someone to talk to. I don't want them to make me feel as if I am bothering them. I feel that the whole situation is very funny. When they need my help, they expect me to be there for them. Indeed, I am there for them, thus keep praising me that I am nice..blahblahblah.. Come on, save it. I don't need people to praise me yet avoid me after some time. I don't have a self-expiry date that says " do not befriend me when my usage time is over".

Sometimes, when i took out my thick autograph book (you know, for friends to sign in and write so much praises about you), I wanted to laugh. It is not that the book is "just for laughter" type nor it is sprayed with laughing powder. But it really amused me when they wrote " Keep in touch". I don't mean that the whole lot of them never get in touch with me but there are indeed some who aren't keeping their promise. What really hurts me is my EX-best friend who flew to Australia and claimed that she will write to me 2 years ago. Well, these are all empty promises. Where am I supposed to send my regards to her? I don't even have her address, not even her email address. When she returned back to Singapore, she didn't inform me. When i was informed by other friends about her return,  it was known that she just went back to Australia again! This is only one good example... but by stating more examples will only make me feel worse.

I believe that everyone hates to be made use of regardless of whether is it friendship or love. Well... so much of my complains... Although it is just a "short" complain (mainly because I can't really express myself well), but the terrible feeling is always inside me. I don't know if being too helpful is my weakness or is it that i am just plain unlucky......

MARIAH CAREY
Against All Odds
CD-Single Info:
Data release: 29/05/2000


How can I just let you walk away
Just let you leave without a trace
When I stand here taking every breath with you
You're the only one who really knew me at all

How can you just walk away from me
When all I can do is watch you leave
'Cause we shared the laughter and the pain
And even shared the tears
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now
'Cause there's just an empty space
There's nothing left here to remind me
Just the memory of your face

So take a look at me now
When there's just an empty space
And you're comin' back to me is against all odds
And that's what I've got to face

I wish I could just make you turn around
Turn around to see me cry
There's so much I need to say to you
So many reasons why
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now
There's just an empty space
There's nothing left here to remind me
Just the memory of your face

So take a look at me now
'Cause there's just an empty space
But to wait for you is all I can do
And that's what I've got to face

Take a good look at me now
'Cause I'll be standing here
And you comin' back to me
Is against all odds
It's the chance I've gotta
Take
Hey yeah

Whoa
Take a look at me now
Mmmmh