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Posted on : 14:14, 16/06/01
Posted by : Victor Hugo
Les Moleserables -the musical sensation
prologue}Why didn�t they pick me?- by the 3870
I know him so well- by Peter and Glenn(in the style of Elaine and Barbra.)
Phantom of the WC Opera leak- by David Buxton
Music of the kareoke night- by the full cast Ha bloody ha they picked us- by the 130
Don�t cry for us Gurnsey(we will still try and book a hotel room)- by the 3870
Interval}
Do you hear the people sing?(yes the windows are breaking)-by the landlord
I could have danced all night-by Peter,Glenn and Martine(if she turns up)
finale} By jove i think i�ve fooled them-by Peter
Oh well we can always watch it on the tv-by the 3870
What a great show-by the full cast
Posted on : 14:22, 16/06/01
Posted by : Kazwak
Re: Les Moleserables -the musical sensation
What about??
Bring Him Home by Glenn�s girlfriend.
If I Were A Richwoman by Jen
Oh What A Circus by anyone reading this MB for the 1st time.
Kazxx
Posted on : 11:25, 16/06/01
Posted by : debs
What is a Cat?
WHAT IS A CAT?
1. Cats do what they want.
2. They rarely listen to you.
3. They�re totally unpredictable.
4. When you want to play, they want to be alone.
5. When you want to be alone, they want to play.
6. They expect you to cater for their every whim.
7. They�re moody.
8. They leave hair everywhere.
CONCLUSION: They�re tiny women in little fur coats.
sorry girls, just read this and it made me laugh
debs xxxxxx
:o)
Posted on : 10:55, 16/06/01
Posted by : debs
Chocolate maths.........
It only takes about a minute...
Work this out as you read.
Be sure you do not read the bottom until you have worked it out!
1. First, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate. (Try for more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (Just to be bold)
3. Add 5. (For Sunday)
4. Multiply it by 50 (I�ll wait while you get the calculator................)
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1751.... If you have not, add 1750 ..........
6. Now, subtract the four-digit year that you were born. (If you remember)
You should have a three-digit number...
The first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times
You want to have chocolate each week).
The next two numbers are your age.
good innit
debs xxxxx
:o)
Posted on : 19:49, 15/06/01
Posted by : SPOON!
Script
Peter, is there any chance you will be using thsi script?
EXT. SPANISH BEACH - DAY
Presenter GLENN HUGILL, walks up to the camera, at the bottom of the screen, as if a typing effect, words appear on the screen.
SCREEN
Day 1, Majorcia
Glenn, starts to speak.
GLENN HUGILL
#Welcome to Mole 2!
This is where we go to,
Out of ten, three remain,
Same old format once again!
But this is where the story starts,
After serveral emotional departs,
Sorry to keep on dolling,
My name is Hugill, Title�s rolling!
We start the Mole 2 opening sequence.
In the next episode, i could right Glenn a rap!
Posted on : 20:30, 15/06/01
Posted by : Glenn
Re: My script, i�ve pasted it again!
I think the script is rather good
I know we�d use it if we could
But me and Peter are the crew
So don�t call us
We�ll call you!
glenn xx
Posted on : 01:55, 10/06/01
Posted by : Just me
Something to ponder
Silence is the absolute poise or balance of body, mind and spirit. The man/woman who preserves his/her selfhood is ever calm and unshaken by the storms of existence.... If you ask him/her: "What is silence?" he/she will answer: "It is the Great Mystery. The holy silence is His voice." If you ask: "What are the fruits of silence?" he/she will say: "They are self-control, true courage or endurance, patience, dignity and reverence. Silence is the counerstone of character."
by:
Ohiyesa, Santee Sioux
Goodnight
Posted on : 16:48, 09/06/01
Posted by : Liberty
Don�t Stress
I Thought these would especcially benefit Peter in his executive �job� but all of them are a good guide to life!
26 Thoughts To Get You Through Almost Any Crisis - So Don�t Stress
1. Indecision is the key to flexibility.
2. You can�t tell which way the train went by looking at the track.
3. There is absolutely no substitute for a genuine lack of preparation.
4. Happiness is merely the remission of pain.
5. Nostalgia isn�t what it used to be.
6. Sometimes too much to drink is not enough.
7. The facts, although interesting are irrelevant.
8. The careful application of terror is also a form of communication.
9. Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world
10. Things are more like they are today than they ever have been before.
11. Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for.
12. Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler.
13. Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
14. I have seen the truth and it makes no sense.
15. Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism.
16. If you think that there is good in everybody, you haven�t met everybody.
17. All things being equal, fat people use more soap.
18. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
19. One-seventh of you life is spent on Monday.
20. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
21. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
22. The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.
23. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
24. This is as bad as it can get, but don�t bet on it.
25. Never wrestle with a pig. You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.
26. The trouble with life is, you�re halfway through it before you realize it�s a �do it yourself� thing.
Seeya Love Libertyx
Posted on : 18:33, 09/06/01
Posted by : Drog
Here are a couple more Liberty..!
Very profound......
1) Its better to light a candle than curse the darkness.
2) Address the person, not their attire.
From 1)T.Lobsang Rampa.
and 2)Rabbie Burns.
Drog..The drinking lager again!
Posted on : 18:36, 09/06/01
Posted by : meg
Re: Here are a couple more Liberty..!
you forgot #3...
never judge a man by his diet:)
Posted on : 17:11, 06/06/01
Posted by : Blofeld
Re: Last Chance
*stroking pussy*
Your evil plans are not evil enough.
You under estimate the power of S.P.E.C.T.R.E.
Your country will be ours by Friday.
And there is nothing that your "007" can do about it!
"ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha......"
*continues to stroke pussy*
Ernst Stavro Blofeld
S.P.E.C.T.R.E.
cc: Rosa Klebb
Posted on : 16:38, 06/06/01
Posted by : William Hague
Last Chance
Hello my fellow Cons... Sorry Conservatives.
I have come up with a final strategy for the Election, which should even the playing field with that Tony fellow. Having deliberated, over 14 pints of Boddingtons, kindly supplied by Debs, I believe that come Friday morning,
no-one will be in power.
This is how it works -
After watching my friend George Bush�s fiasco, I will call for a recount in all constituencies in which we lose...That may well be ALL constituencies.
If the count still gives Labour a majority of over 12,000, I will ask for another recount.
If everything goes well, it may take up to 4 years. I can then say to you good folk - "What has Labour done for you in the last 4 years.............Nothing!".
Then you would all vote for me and that Portfolio man..I think hes after my job....!
or...
Dont vote at all. I might win by default!
Well my fellow Tories, have a long sleep tomorrow. Hope you dont wake up until midnight..
Willy Vague..Also known as the man who had nothing and will also have nothing in the future.
Posted on : 10:35, 06/06/01
Posted by : Willy Vague
Republicans: vote here
I, Willy Vague (love child of Mrt Thatch) will personally see to the fact that we do not enter europe.
instead we will return once more to being the lapdog of america. as my dear mother sucked up to mr reagan and mr bush, i too will continue the tradition and remain firmly entrenched in the presidents butt cheeks.
what is that tory blair going on about - the nhs? i will just encourage more people to take out private health insurance, and so that way, they pay twice - sensible really. more nurses and doctors, who needs them - the ones we have are doing a sterling job (or should that read jobs) of an average 80 hours per week. they say they can eat now.
transport. hmmmm. isn�t public transport just for old people, students and dole pushers? they have all the time in the world - they can wait for a bus.
i think i may reduce the tax for those earning over �100,000 to 15%. to make up the shortfall - those of you earning between �20,000 and �100,000 will pay 60% - it�s too much for the proletariat anyway.
anyway, vote republican, you know you want a return to that fabulous culture we call america
willy vague
Posted on : 07:15, 06/06/01
Posted by : Tony Blair
Re: Tory Vote Here....!
Please vote now, I don�t know how long I can keep this inane smile, the laugh is getting more and more strained and I�m being caught out at every turn. Prescott is the only reason I�m still in office, he scares me, I have a year old son, if I remeber rightly, Theo I think his name is? I need a holiday, and as per usual I will be supporting British tourism by going to Spain.
British? Remember that word? I have every intention of having it taken out of the Dictinary, what do you fancy The United States of Britain? I could then achieve my ultimate goal and be President, a puppet nodding at every thing our Parliment in Europe tells us to do.And as for the pound, I have already approved the design of the Euro. Obviously because of the varying Royals within Europe we cannot offend any Royal house so the queen will be removed. The recent Peerage awarded to the Governor of The bank of England had to be done so when he is redundant, he won�t try to apply for the job as Governor of the Bank of Europe, I have already been told that "Zer vill be no imput from ze Britishes, ve shall at last get control of your country, ve are prepared to finish vot Hitler started"
Public Transport was privatised by the Torys, it was I think the worst thing that could have happened, but as PM I refuse to look at nationalising it again....why should I they messed it up it�s only up to me to make the most of their mistakes and use them for political gain, NOT correct them.
I am continuing with my scheme to cut down waiting times in Hospitals, I am having more waiting rooms built, and employing ushers to ferry people from room to room, cutting down the average waiting time from 1 hour to tranferal to seven waiting room with a waiting time in each of just ten minutes. I will be employing 10,000 new nurses, now thats? How many hospitals do we have in this country? I�m sure thats about one per hosptital.
Self employed IT Technicians, why shouldn�t you pay IR35? You are earning far too much money, AND as for the increase in National Insurance as of April 2002 for anyone earning over �30,000 per year. Get real you earn too much anyway.
Teachers just need to realise that they can be in two places at once. I have reduced class sizes and if my theory is correct, they can be reduced enough to have each teacher teaching two classes at once, they will just have to buy rollerskates.
Give me another 4 years, I�ve only just got over being elected last time, it takes a while to get into the swing of things and I�m really looking forward to my celebratary party with H from Steps, you know the one who did the opening ceremony on the Millenium Bridge, which is now being given to Disney as there latest white-knuckle ride. The Dome is being used as hard-core for my new home in Germany, ready to be in close contact with our parliament.
Vote for me as you know I have excellant taste and judgement, I am of course the man who looked across a crowded room at Cherie and thought "She�s Gorgeous!!!!"
Set the Tone for the future *Smarm*
Posted on : 20:36, 27/04/01
Posted by : kazwak
A quiz.
1.What language is spoken in France?
2.Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions
- OR -
Give the first name of John Major.
3.Would you ask William Shakespeare to:
a.build a bridge
b.sail the ocean
c.lead an army
d.WRITE A PLAY
4.Metric conversion. How many feet is 0.0 metres?
5.What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 5?
6.How many commandments was Moses given? (approximately)
7.What are people in America�s far north called?
a.Westerners
b.Southerners
c. Northerners
8.Spell - Bush, Thatcher and Hague
7.Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the Sixth. Name the previous five.
8.Where does rain come from?
a.Tesco
b.A Little Chef
c.Holland
d.The sky
9.Can you explain Einstein�s Theory of Relativity?
a.Yes
b.No
10."God Save the Queen" is the National Anthem for which country?
11. Explain Le Chatelier�s Principle of Dynamic Equilibrium
- OR -
Spell your name in BLOCK LETTERS.
12.Where is the basement in a three story building located?
13.Advanced mathematics. If you have three apples, how many apples do you have?
14.What does BT (British Telecom) stand for?
Posted on : 20:41, 27/04/01
Posted by : Rose
Re: A quiz.
:( i flunked. lololol better go ask Dear Rose for the answers. hahaha
enjoyed reading the quiz
Rose xx
Posted on : 22:34, 27/04/01
Posted by : Kim
Re: A quiz.
1. Spanish
2. John Majors first name is Barry
3. Build a bridge (of course!)
4. 10 ft
5. 7:30
6. 400?
7. Southerners
8. Bish Thacher Hage
7. Henry VIII, Charles II Elizabeth I Henry VII and Mary I
8. Little Chef
9. No
10. Brazil
11. MIK
12. Top floor
13. 2
14. British television
Now i think i got them all right, not sure though, lol
Luv Kim
x x x
Posted on : 23:33, 27/04/01
Posted by : kazwak
Re: A quiz.
Well done Kim by my calculations u got 16 out of 27.
That means they were all correct.
You are obviously as intellegent as me ...lol.
Kazx.
Posted on : 14:02, 13/04/01
Posted by : Liberty
Ways to get chosen as a contestant
Ok here�s my sure fire - can�t posibly go wrong ways to get picked as a contestant!!!
*Write on your aplication form that your hobbies include drinking, drinking and more drinking and that you enjoy holidaying at the Priory.
*Get refrences from the Priory - describing what a blatant alcoholic you are
*Send in a photo of yourself with a beer can in your hand (although i�m sure they�re not fussy and any sort of alcohol woyld do!)
*Tell Peter that your occupation is a wine tester or pub landlord
*Prepare for all questions from Peter to be Glenn or Alcohol related
*At the interview make your first words to Peter - �I do not fancy Glenn� (Yes the Males as well) - just so he�s not on the defensive
*If Peter as you if you have any questions say, �no i�m not an inquisative sort of person�!!!
*And finally - for the clincher - tell Peter your favourite movie of all time is Beevis and Buthead!!!!!!!
Hope these help!!!!
Seeya Love Libertyx
Posted on : 14:56, 13/04/01
Posted by : Liberty
Ways To Be Chosen As The Mole
Ok - Now these really are fool Proof!!!
*Bring a doctors note saying that you are a pathalogical liar - and that you always get 100% in your lie detector tests!!!
*Tell Peter your occupation is a politician (then he�ll definatly believe the pathalogical liar bit!!!)
*Turn up to the interview wearing your bedroom slippers
*Ask Peter if he�d like to borrow your Take That collection!
*Ask for your interview to take place at 4:00am - and tell him you�ve had lots of practice at secret nightly rendevous!!!
*Tell him you have had plenty of experience at sinking ships (unlike David) and were the director of Titanic!!!
Hope this also helps - and don�t forget to mention alcohol!
seeya Love Libertyx
Posted on : 11:44, 08/04/01
Posted by : Louise
Dalai Lama Personality Test
This is pretty neat! Try it!
The Dalai Lama Personality Test
This test is very exciting.
It only has four (4) questions, and you�ll be surprised about the results!
How to read the results will be posted by mike so please do not look before starting.
The human mind is like an umbrella:
it works better when it opens.
It is fun to answer the questions, but please follow the
instructions.
MAKE
A
WISH
BEFORE
STARTING
THE
TEST.
Caution!
Answer the questions step by step. This test has only
four questions,
but if you see the answers before finishing, your
results will not be honest or accurate.
Scroll your screen slowly and write down your answers.
This is a serious questionnaire that will tell you a lot about your inner self.
There are no right and wrong answers.
First, order the following animals according to your preference:
a) Cow;
b) Tiger;
c) Sheep;
d) Horse;
e) Pig.
Second, write a word that describes each of the
following:
a) Dog;
b) Cat;
c) Rat;
d) Coffee;
e) Ocean.
Third, think about someone (who also knows you and is important to you,)that can be related to the following colors (do not repeat your answers.)
Name only one person per color:
a) Yellow;
b) Orange;
c) Red;
d) White;
e) Green.
Finally, write down your favorite number, as well as your favorite weekday.
Did you finish?
Verify that all your answers are accurate.
Last chance to verify...
Now, look at the answers posted by mike in reply
Posted on : 11:55, 08/04/01
Posted by : Mike
Re:
First answer
This will define your priorities in life:
Cow: means career.
Tiger: means pride.
Sheep: means love.
Horse: means family.
Pig: means money.
Second answer
Your description of Dog implies your own personality.
Your description of Cat implies your spouse or couple�s personality.
Your description of Rat implies the personality of your enemies.
Your description of Coffee is how you interpret sex.
Your description of Ocean implies your own life.
Third answer
Yellow: Someone you will never forget.
Orange: Someone you could consider a good friend.
Red: Someone you really love.
White: Your twin soul.
Green: Someone you will remember all your life.
Fourth answer
Send this message to as many persons as your favorite
number,
and your wish will be granted on your favorite day.
This is what the Dalai Lama has said about the millennium, and it only takes a few minutes to read and think about it. Do not keep this message; the mantra must leave your hands. You will have a pleasant surprise. Send this mantra e-mail to at least 5 persons, and your life will change favorably.
0-4 persons: Your life will slightly change.
5-9 persons: Life will change to your own needs.
9-14 persons: At least you will have 5 surprises in the next 3 weeks.
15 or more persons: Your life will drastically change and all what you dream will become true.
"If someone does not smile at you, be generous and offer your own smile.
Nobody needs more a smile than the one that cannot smile to others.