April 2000
'G' is for GOLD - Are Two Belts in Too Cool's Future?
by Mike Fazioli
Then there's the hottest team of them all: Too Cool.
'Scuse me?
That's a natural reaction. You see homies Grandmaster Sexay and Scotty Too Hotty next to the New Age Outlaws and the Acolyes, and that old Sesame Street jingle comes to mind: "One of these things is not like the other."
It's probably also natural for vicious bruisers like the Acolytes and Dudleyz to take one look at the hip-hop heroes and laugh them off. That's the kind of thinking that could give Too Cool two belts too soon, both men agree.
"I'll tell ya what," Scotty Too Hotty says. "Those other teams better keep their eyes open. Size don't mean nuttin' to Too Cool. The bigger they are, the more face we got to dance over."
"If all those bamas don't give us our props," says Grandmaster Sexay, "then not only will we beat them down and earn our respect, but they could be grinnin' up at the daisy roots when it's all said and done!"
The team formerly known as Too Much has made a startling transformation. It's all about hip-hop now. The look, the moves, the talk, and flava - and it's been there all along, says Scotty.
"Scotty Too Hotty and the Grandmaster don't have a hip-hop background, 'G,' we are hip-hop!" he says. "Straight out da trailer. We live the lifestyle 24/7. We ain't no posers!"
Question their authenticity if you like, but there's no questioning the results. Losses have turned into win after win after win. And, just as importantly, fan hostility or indifference has turned into main-event-worthy "pops."
"They have finally seen that we are the originators, innovators and percolators of cool!" Grandmaster Sexay says. "We know if we don't win, we don't dance. And everyone wants us to dance!"
This isn't a fly-guy-by-night success story. Both Scotty and the Grandmaster have enjoyed singles success in the Federation's light heavyweight division and in other organizations. And for years, the Too Much combination of "Too Sexy" Brian Christopher and "Too Hot" Scott Taylor lurked in the background, taking on light-heavyweight teams like Kaientai and even defeating Al Snow and HEAD in a tag-team competition.
Something was missing, though. Too Much was barely a blip on the radar screen of the World Wrestling Federation's elite tag teams; the fans knew the duo more for their obnoxious ring behavior and for Christopher's alleged family ties to Jerry "the King" Lawler than for their ring efforts.
When Christopher was forced from competition last year by a knee injury, it was too bad for Too Much. They quickly became a forgotten duo. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, Too Cool rose from the ashes of Too Much and straight to the top of the contenders list for the tag-team gold.
"Yo, ya see, 'G,' Too Much was always Too Cool," says Scotty. "We've always been great wrestlers, worn funky clothes and, most of all, been great dancers. The only difference is we turned it up about 100 notches."
"No matter where we go, the women can't get enough of both us fly guys," the Grandmaster says. "Although they tend to get a little more from the Grandmaster."
"Who is more successful with the ladies? What do you care?" Scotty says. "Let's just put it this way: they don't call him Grandmaster Sexay for nothing, and Scotty Too Hotty didn't learn to do 'The Worm' in the ring!"
"What's next for Scotty Too Hotty and the Grandmaster?" Scotty says. "One word: GOLD! Now that would be Too Cool."
Several passages from this article have been omitted.