Everyday I awaken to whining compaints
Alarm clock, shut it off, you yell
I depart from our bed as you bury your head
In the covers with no farewell
You sleep in your nightgown, I'm driving downtown
haggling with clientele
I envy your life as a housewife
as I try to live in this corporate hell

Can you help me to lessen this stress from my work?
Can I give you a black eye?
Your lifestyle is crap, you're a smug, heartless jerk
So I'll beat you, my wife

Your justification that no occupation
Allows you more time to clean
Is incredibly dumb, Unemployment is fun
I can see through your little scheme
You need a few bruises 'cause you're so useless
I thought marriage meant we're a team
Just listen, I'll discipline you
With a club, counterbalance your lazy routine

When I want you to cook me a warm, decent meal
You can't even do that
Like a dog I can teach you to fetch or to heel
All I need is a bat

Now I'll make you blow my nose
And iron all of my clothes
From now on whatever I say goes

Inflamed compensation will vent my frustration
You'll have red slap marks on all four cheeks
Whenever I see you slack, my belt whip
Will teach you correct techniques
Don't try to escape from your cage
Or I will beat you til you're black and blue
I want you to know what I feel like
I will show what I feel like to you