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- You have ever price-shopped for Top Ramen.
- You live in a house with three couches, none of which match.
- You consider mac and cheese a balanced meal.
- You have ever written a check for 45 cents.
- You have a fine collection of domestic beer bottles.
- You have ever seen two consecutive sunrises without sleeping.
- Your glass set is composed of McDonald's Extra Value Meal plastic cups (i.e., Olympic Dream Team I or II).
- Your underwear supply dictates the time between laundry loads.
- You cannot remember when you last washed your car.
- You can pack your worldly possessions into the back of a pick-up (one trip).
- You have ever had to justify yourself for buying Natural Light.
- The first thing you do in the morning is roll over and introduce yourself.
- You average less than three hours of sleep a night.
- Your trash is overflowing and your bank account isn't.
- You go to Wal-Mart more than three times a week.
- You eat at the cafeteria because it's "free," even though it sucks.
- You are personally keeping the local pizza place from bankruptcy.
- You wake up ten minutes before class.
- You wear the same jeans 13 days in a row -- without washing them.
- Your breakfast consists of a Coke on the way to class.
- Your social life consists of a date with the library.
- Your idea of doing your hair is putting on a baseball cap.
- It takes a shovel to find the floor of your room.
- You carry less than a dollar on you at all times because that's all you have.
- You haven't done your laundry in so long you are wearing your swimsuit to class.
- Your midnight snack is microwave popcorn.
- You celebrate finding a quarter.
- Your room is so cold that your toilet freezes over.
- Your walls are plastered with posters of half-naked men or women (whichever is your preference).
- You have built up a tolerance for certain beverages.
- You wear a sweatsuit for so long that it stands up by itself.
- Your backpack is giving you scoliosis.
- You get more sleep in class than your room.
- Your idea of feeding the poor is buying yourself some ramen noodles.
- You can sleep through your roommate's blaring stereo.
- You live in an area that is smaller than most mobile homes.
- You get more e-mail than mail.
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