(note: im not sure, but i think im going to replace this chapter with something else...see, i didnt want this story to be a romance, though in many ways the central theme is ...love (well a part of it is). about love but a mockery of romance...im not sure what this chapter does to accomplish either. its just nice, ok?! probably going to replace this with something else.)

CHP. 13. Someone’s been lied to with all the right promises (I miss waking up beside you)

 

      The clouds become darker as the sky lightens. Below the sky, the sea is calm: reflects the lightened sky. Below, the sand, a dimmer sand, is freckled and pimpled with footsteps. The sand is darkest and blurriest of all: the sea, a mass of reflection. Everything but the sky and the water is becoming dimmer and darker. It is almost night.

      “This is so nice, isn’t it?” Carmelo sighs.

      “Yea, I guess. A bit cold to go swimming though.”  

      They watch the waves a bit, returning and receding. It is difficult to see what is beyond the water, at the horizon. Some dark blue clouds, a boat, a lighter sky.

      “I don’t go to the beach enough,” he sighs again. Carmelo lies on his side and props his head up with his hand. There is no beach towel or blanket-- just his body on the grainy sand.

      “Lindsey?”

      “Eh?”

      “What are you going to do?” he asks, slowly and lazily.

      “I don’t know. Get a job maybe. I’ve never had a job before.” Lindsey hears her voice diffused through wind and sea, muffled as though she is watching herself on home video. All she hears is the wind through the microphone.

      “The rent isn’t that much. If you get that job at the bakery, you’ll have enough for the rent and for yourself.” The wind and sea muffle his voice too.

      Could be, she says.

      Night is almost here, they notice. They look at the waves creeping on shore, shadowed and strange. They imagine creatures running along the shore with each rush. The water seems to reach farther, the horizon seems move back, the sky is sucked away somewhere.

      Lindsey? he asks.

      Yes? she answers and looks at him, noticing the whites of his eyes in the arriving night.

      Are you happy with me? Carmelo continues.

      It’s only been two days, but yea, I guess I am.

      The two of them sit and stare at the sky and ocean and await the oncoming night. Saying nothing, but both thinking. Carmelo, most likely about Lindsey. Lindsey, thinking about Carmelo, most likely. She supposes that she is happy with him. Lindsey looks at him and the whites of his eyes, notices that they are kind of sad and looking at the water.

      Lindsey looks at the water, also.

      Her mind wanders from the water to the sky to school to Tanya to the biomech to Naimlis to unnecessary surgery with Rusty. When she forgets everything, she stares at the beach again. Carmelo has fallen asleep next to her.

      He has fallen asleep right on the cold sand, she thinks.   

      She looks up and notices something – that there is nothing on the horizon. The sky is black, the water is black. There is no horizon. How could the sky and land be one amorphous oblivion? When did it happen? She had been watching this whole time. Near her she still sees the sand, the waves on shore, the creatures running. Beyond that, beyond her and the sleeping Carmelo there is nothing. There is sand all over his clothes.

      The bakery, she thinks. Lindsey is just as confused as ever.

      “I really fucked up,” she whispers.

      It is like the end of the world. She stares, trying to find a boat or light or something on the horizon. There is only foreground: herself sitting and getting sand in her pockets and Carmelo, sleeping in the sand.

      “Carmelo.” Lindsey calls softly.

      He, of course, cannot hear her.

      “It’s really dark, Carmelo. Let’s go.” She calls again.

      He still cannot hear her.

      I know what I have to do, she thinks. “I am going to take it back. I am going to take the biomech device back.”

      Nobody answers her. She could barely see the shore anymore. She tries to listen to Carmelo’s breathing, but cannot. There is only the sound of the ocean.

      “Carmelo.” She calls again, softly.

      Of course he cannot hear her. She cannot even see him.

      “I don’t know how, but I’m going to steal it back. That is all I can do.”

      There is no other way, Carmelo. Lindsey stands up, slipping slightly on the sand. Carmelo is sound asleep, his head, his face, his back completely covered in tiny specks of sand. She sat back down. She couldn’t bear the thought of waking up alone on a dark beach.