i'm looking to run away,
does anyone see me starting to fade?
i'm gonna find a corner of my own,
try and figure out this mess alone,
and fixate on the past, the present and the pain...
which part of you am i doubting?
what lies behind the silence that i'm shouting?
so i'll quit my job, and drop everything,
store all the stuff that i can't bring,
and head up northeast to find the nearest mountain...
i drive uphill endlessly,
speeding away from something that i can't see,
guess these glasses just don't work so well,
fogged and blinded by the stories that i tell,
it seems my thoughts always give my actions the second degree
chorus:
well i don't know how
to break free
release these chains
that bind me
this pain punctures and forces me to give pause
for i know that i'm the source, the effect, and the cause
daily, i'm haunted by a nameless face
that's filled with a pain that time cannot erase
so empathy starts to creep on in,
and i find myself in their skin
and i'm burst into pieces and scatter all over the place:
part of me squints at the florescent glow
of my jail cell's windowed view of san diego
smarter than the granted they take me for
i grasp on to everything they ignore,
cause they'll never see beyond what they think they know
part of me sits on a balcony alone
my head in one hand while the other clutches a phone
why can't she just make up her mind
and leave the past eight months behind
her silence hurts more than she'll ever know
chorus
so many things i want to tell you
but i'm stuck up here alone, not knowing how to
i'm sorry my indecision is the burden that you bear
i'm sorry that confusion is what my eyes choose to wear
and i can't say who or what i'm turning into
what is there left for me to say
except that i regret this sad display
but soon i will rise above the debris
and untie the rope that ties me to the tree
of self-inflicted emotional decay