10 Things a Woman Will Never Say:

 
  1. Could our relationship be more physical? I'm tired of just being friends.
  2. Go ahead and leave the seat up, it's easier for me to douche that way.
  3. I think hairy butts are really sexy.
  4. Hey, get a whiff of that one.
  5. Please don't throw that old T-shirt away, the holes in the armpit are just too cute.
  6. This diamond is way too big.
  7. I won't even put my lips on that thing unless I get to swallow.
  8. Wow, it really is 14 inches!
  9. Does this make my butt look too small?
  10. I'm wrong. You must be right again.

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