Have you ever played a joke on you rommate??? ... Well... if
not... Here are somethings that you could do to him do drive him crazy....
Hehehehe... And they're fun to do too...
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Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!"
as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards,
keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"
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Trash the room when your roommate's not around. Then leave
and wait for your roommate to come back. When he/she does, walk in and
act surprised. Say, "Uh-oh, it looks like THEY were here again."
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Set your roommate's bed on fire. Apologize and explain that
you've been watching too much "Beavis & Butthead." Do it again. Tell
him/her that you're not sorry because this time, they deserved it.
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Every Thursday, pack up everything you own and tell your roommate
you're going home. Come back in an hour and explain that no one was home.
Unpack everything and go to sleep.
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Every time you wake up, start yelling, "Help! Where am I?!" and
run around the room for a few minutes. Then go back to bed. If your roommate
asks, say you don't know what he/she is talking about.
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Draw a tiny black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look
at it and say, "It's spreading, it's spreading."
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Buy a McDonald's "Happy Meal" for lunch every day. Eat the straw
and the napkin. Throw everything else away.
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Buy a plant. Sleep with it at night. Talk to it. After a few weeks,
start to argue with it loudly. Then yell, "I can't live in the same room
with you," storm out of the room and slam the door. Get rid of the plant,
but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant ever again.
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Hang up pictures of chickens all over the room. If your roommate
eats eggs, yell at him/her and call him/her a cannibal.
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Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so,
look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."
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Lock the door while your roommate is out. When he/she comes back
and tries to unlock it, yell, "Don't come in, I'm naked!" Keep this up
for several hours. When you finally let your roommate in, immediately take
off all of your clothes, and ignore your roommate.
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Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantula.
If your roommate asks, say, "Oh, he's around here somewhere."
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While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When
your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.
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Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the
sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey,
where is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.
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Hire a night watchman to guard the room while you are sleeping.
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Practice needlepoint every night. At one point, grab your thumb
and scream, "Owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!" Cry hysterically for a few minutes,
and then go to bed. Sob and sniff all night.
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When your roommate comes in, pretend that you are on the phone,
screaming angrily and shouting obscenities. After you hang up, say, "That
was your mom. She said she'd call back."
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Change the locks on the door. Don't let your roommate in unless
he/she says the secret word. Change the secret word often. If your roommate
can't guess the secret word, make him/her pay a tithe.
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Hit your roommate on the head with a brick. Claim that you were
trying to kill a mosquito.
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Put up flyers around the building, reporting that your roommate
is missing. Offer a reward for his/her safe return.
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Get some hair. Disperse it around your roommate's head while he/she
is asleep. Keep a pair of scissors by your bed. Snicker at your roommate
every morning.
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Every time you see your roommate yell, "You jerk" and kick him/her
in the stomach. Then buy him/her some ice cream.
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Put your glasses on before you go to bed. Take them off as soon
as you wake up. If your roommate asks, explain that they are Magic Dream
Glasses. Complain that you've been having terrible nightmares.
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Eat lots of "Lucky Charms." Pick out all the yellow moons and stockpile
them in the closet. If your roommate inquires, explain that visitors are
coming, but you can't say anything more, or you'll have to face the consequences.
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Set up meetings with your roommate's faculty advisor. Inquire about
his/her academic potential. Take lots of notes, and then give your roommate
a full report. Insist that he/she do the same.
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"Drink" a raw egg for breakfast every morning. Explain that you
are in training. Eat a dozen donuts every night.
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Buy a Jack-In-The-Box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown
pops out. Scream continuously for twenty minutes.
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Bring in potential "new" roommates from around campus. Give them
tours of the room and the building. Have them ask about your roommate in
front of him/her, and reply, "Oh, him/her? He/she won't be here much longer."
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If your roommate comes home after midnight, hit him/her on the head
with a rolling pin. Immediately go to bed, muttering, "Ungrateful little..."
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Pile dirty dishes in your roommate's bed. Insist that you don't
know how they got there.
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Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room.
Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.
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Feign a serious illness for two weeks. Have a priest come to your
room and visit you. Write out a will, leaving everything to your roommate.
One day, miraculously "recover." Insist that your roommate write out a
will, leaving everything to you. Every time he/she coughs, excitedly say,
"Oooh, are you dying?"
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Live in the hallway for a month. Afterwards, bring all of your stuff
back into the room and tell your roommate, "Okay, your turn."
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Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then
pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message
was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep
this up for several weeks.
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Bowl inside the room. Set up tournaments with other people in the
building. Award someone a trophy. If your roommate wants to bowl too, explain
that he/she needs bowling shoes.
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Walk backwards all the time. Then pretend to trip and hurt yourself.
Fake an injury and go through a long, painful recovery. Start walking backwards
again.
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Explain to your roommate that you're going to be housing a prospective
student in the near future. One day, bring in a pig. If your roommate protests,
hug the pig and tell your roommate that he/she hurt its feelings. Watch
T.V. with the pig, eating lots of bacon.
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Punch a hole in the T.V. Sit and watch it anyway, complaining about
the poor picture quality.
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Wear a cape. Stand in front of an open window for about an hour
every day. Then, one day, when your roommate is gone, go outside and lie
down underneath the window, pretending to be hurt, and wait for your roommate
to return. The next day, start standing in front of the window again.
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Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name
one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others.
Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain
to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."
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