A really great parking spot can move you to tears.

You can recommend about 3 good body piercing parlours.

You make well over $100,000 and you still can't find a nice place to live.

You realize there are far more rainbow flags in the city than Canadian Flags.

When the temperature rises above zero degrees, you yell "Woohooo! Patio weather!"

You enjoy watching channel 47 multicultural TV

You're guaranteed to know at least one person on every episode of Speaker's Corner.

You haven't been to the CN Tower since you were six, but still have nightmares about that damn turbo elevator.

You've had at least 3 bicycles stolen in the past 10 years.

You've partied with at least one of the members of The Kids in the Hall

At least 3 of your friends have moved to Vancouver

You turn your nose up at any establishment frequented by the S&M crowd. (Scarborough and Mississauga)

You never, never, never swim in the lake

You know "The Beaches" are really called "The Beach", but still say "The Beaches" just to annoy all the nitwits who live there

You ever had a birthday party at the Organ Grinder or The Mad Hatter

You can say "world's tallest freestanding structure" ten times fast

You know the correct answer to "Where do shopping carts go to die?" is "The Don River"

You speak better Chinese than French

The word "cabbagetown" doesn't strike you as particularily amusing

Castle Frank subway station remains one of the great mysteries of the universe for you.

You know what the bathrooms in the First Canadian Place are REALLY for

You don't know where Fort York is, but have a vague recollection of being there in a past life

You know the Demic's song "I Wanna Go To New York City" was intended as sarcasm, not a weekend getaway suggestion

You know where to find Dim Sum, Sushi, Curry, Pad Thai and a dildo at 3 am on a weeknight

For the last time, it's pronounced 'TRONNA'!

You consider eye contact a sign of hostility and an invasion of your privacy.

It takes you half an hour to get to work by TTC and you are the envy of all your friends.

You mourned the death of the Spadina Bus.

You know someone who went to high school with at least one member of The Barenaked Ladies or RUSH

You laugh heartily at people who refer to highway four hundred and one.

You've taken the vomit comit.

You can manuver your bike across Queen st. without getting caught in the streetcar tracks.

You know the difference between souvlaki, moussaka and spanakoptia.

You can name at least three locations of The Beer Store that are open till 11 PM.

You have NEVER been to the Hard Rock Cafe

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Toronto.

You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk."
You understand the phrase, "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."
You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
You drink pop, not soda.
You know what a Mickey and 2-4 mean.
You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars.
You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion and many more are Canadians.
You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!
You know what a touque is.
You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed" not "Zee".
You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan."
You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada."
You were in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
"Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary and more polite than, "Huh?"
Winter. Whenever you want it. And then some.
There's German food, Italian food, Chinese food, Armenian food, American food, but NO Canadian food.
You call a "mouse" a "moose".
You like the Americans a little because they don't want Quebec either.
Contests run by anyone other than the government have "skill-testing questions" that winners must answer correctly before they can claim a prize.
Everything is labelled in English and French.
Milk comes in plastic bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
Mountain Dew has no caffeine.

~.~

You go to Chinese restaurants to yum cha every day.

You go to concerts more that going to church.

Your backpack weighed more than 40 pounds since primary school.

You love to put stickers with Chinese phrases on your car.

Your regular slang includes: pk and dnlm.

You love the number "8" (bak).

You have a pager.

You wear a pair of oval-shaped glasses even though you don't need one.

You call your secondary male teachers AH-SIR.

You call your secondary female teachers MISSE.

You wear designer clothes.

You wished to join RHKPD when you were young.

You had at least one nick name throughout your primary and secondary school.

You are proud of your nationality - BDTC/BNO.

You could drink alcoholic beverages LEGALLY when you are 18.

You like to drive Japanese/European cars but not American.

You know what "Form One Jai" means.

You don't call lottery as "lotto." You call it "Mark Six" instead.

You are so "inch" (tsoon).

You pretend you know Mandarin even though you DON'T.

You only use the word "toilet," you never use the words "bathroom," or "restroom."

You started singing karaoke when you were five.

You drive an Integra.

You are an expert in MJ.

You tip only 10% in Hong Kong.

You prefer Sony or Aiwa.

You have more than 30 cousins.

You know what this means: hem ga chan.

Ancient HKers call police as "Green Clothes."

You don't know much about the "Basic Law."

You can't tell the difference between "Welcome" and "Wellcome."

You have many many credit cards.

You usually have more than two DVD players at home.

You love to wear famous brand clothes: DKNY, Versace, Chanel, Polo, etc.

You love to gossip about HK entertainment.

You like discos.

You watch both "Chinese" or "American" movies more than any other nationalities in the world.

When you say "how are you" in Mandarin, you are actually saying some bad words.

You never "french kiss" in the public.

You speak Cantonese loudly although there are many Americans around.

You only carry the latest cellular phone.

12am is too early for you to sleep.

12pm is too early for you to wake up.

You never study until the day before the quiz.

You like to skate.

You play badminton.

You drink vita soy drink.

You wear Seiko and Citizen.

You eat instant noodles too much.

You are majoring in engineering or business management.

You read "tsing tao" instead of "world journal" or "china press."

You like to use Chinese slang.

You don't wear shorts in summers.

You never order appetizers at a restaurant.

You wear long sleeves in summer.

Your Chinese handwriting really sucks.

You nick a lot of McDonalds' napkins.

You ask for extra coffee in McDonalds.

You build a mountain of salad when you eat in Pizza Hut.

Your stationeries are full of your favorite cartoon character.

Your school bag cost well over $1000 dollars and is made of real leather.

You are known by your foreign friends as somebody who knew martial arts since birth.

You also have a collection of robot models, built or yet to be built.

You call Lexus cars "Luss-us" instead or "Lex-us."

If someone buys ANYTHING, you brag about how its cheaper in Hong Kong.

You've bragged about the Hong Kong airport at least once.

You call bus "bah see."

You call cheese "chee see."

You call Mercedes Benz cars "Benz- see."

You see everyone around you with SARS protection mask!

~.~