| i haven't lived in the past four weeks i shut everything off i haven't dealt in the past four months i kept everything in and this is when it all explodes some empty night when i grab my pen and i know i have to write i just have to write i just have to let this inside out. waking up in the morning and i don't want to leave my bed i don't want to face another lucid day of my time slipping through my hands like promises fading away. and if i just stayed in my bed all day and night then maybe i could beat this process and stop losing parts of me in the gutters of academia where i go cuz i don't know what else to do with my time. i could stay in my head all day and live in the beauty that i can't hold onto cannot recreate no matter how many words i write or art i make i find it futile i can't do anything just take a picture, take a thousand pictures. just take a picture maybe we can live here forever maybe we can live here and this is my love inside my torture and this is my hope inside my myopia that forces me not to see all the things i've taken, all the beauty i've taken. this is why so many people i knew in high school were married at 18 cuz it's so hard to make a decision so maybe if i knock my girlfriend up then i won't ever have to know what to do with my life cuz i'll just have to do something just do anything just do anything just do anything i'll do anything i'll do anything i can't do anything |
| Do anything |
| by Kevin S. McFadden |