(I think the motivation of this is rather explanatory.)
Its been so long since i've heard your voice since i've longed to feel your presence I want to gain that passion back. But i feel so far away from the finish line.
Their is a constant battle to do right or wrong More often than not i do wrong I myself admit that i am a failure and unworthy to accept God's gift But yet He still died for me. Why do (must) i feel that Jesus' blood can't clean me in the end I always seem to fail at the same sins over and over again It never gets any easier... just harder Where are my brothers and sisters? NOwhere to be seen.. Noone to tell my secret sin too. Nobody could take it. MY credibility would be tarnished. But by continuing in my shameful sin Each time i nail those hands and feet to the cross. Why do i forget His love for me WHy do i push it away. Because i feed the dog inside me that pulls me further and further away from my Creater. I deserve none of this love. But yet He does it not for the whole world but for me. Why me. Why would He go through a life of torment and ridicule and pain to save me. That kind of love i will never understand. I feed myself daily... not by mouth but by mind. I say i want to do good. but i never really mean it anymore because doing bad feels so good. People can never really see the real me. So spiritual and close to God they think i am. When i myself am no closer to God then one who doesn't believe. So what is a brother to do with noone to help him in his newfound beliefs Noone to comfort him Noone to share his pain Noone to cry with... Noone to belong with. But to seek the one who deserves all Praise God in Heaven He is worthy of all Praise and love so i will Seek him in my despair and time of solitude (grief) I so long to hear your voice again Dad. I want to now my shepards voice. I want to know his call. I WANT TO KNOW HIM!