I felt a dagger in my bosom

I felt a dagger in my bosom
I sensed a knife in my breast
I was momentarily distracted
By this sword in my chest.

I grasped it by the handle
I grabbed it by the hilt
I gently wrapped my fingers round
The halberd's upper stilt.

I pulled the bloody dirk out
I removed it from my chest
I summoned all my earthly strength
And the dagger I did wrest.

I faced the final curtain
I less than gracefully died
I felt Death's hand upon me
"Bugger!", I cried.