   |
| Dimension of kevinab1111 |
| Welcome to the Dimension of kevinab1111. This is my home page. You can find many stuff that describe me here (ie: silly, silly, etc). ENJOY YOUR STAY !! PS. If you are having some trouble seeing the words because of the background, wait a while. |
 |
| This is my pet seal - Sealy (he's fishing)!! HIS pets are wandering around in the Dimension of kevinab1111. Can you find them all? |
 |
|
| Seamonkeys |
| Seamonkeys are cool!! They are so tiny, but they are still cool!! If you want to know more about Seamonkeys, READ A BOOK!!!! |
| Things Not Found in a Blender |
| SQUID COOL WHIP TAPE STAPLES TOWELS ANT POISON |
| Riddles: The Loco Side |
| How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident? Be too drunk you can't find your keys. What are some points to remember when passing or being passed? Make eye contact and wave "hello" if he/she is cute. How do you deal with heavy traffic? Heavy psychedelics. When driving through fog, what should you use? Your car. What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? The color. What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving? I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster. What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully? I would be forced to drive unlawfully. What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? Carry loaded weapons Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? The pick-up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do." |
| Thoughts |
| It is impossible to lick your elbow. A crocodile can't stick its tongue out. A shrimp's heart is in their head. A pig's orgasm lasts for up to 30 minutes. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, you're heart stops for a milisecond. In a study of 200,000 ostriches over a period of 80 years, no one reported a single case where an ostrich buried its head in the sand (or attempeted to do so). It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky. By law, every child in Belgium must take harmonica lessons at Primary school. Rats and horses can't vomit. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language. Tip: Never drink pies. Advice for war: "You don't win a war by dying for your country; You win a war by making the other SOB die for his country." - General Patton |
| Did you find all of Sealy's pets? Good. If you think that was easy, try naming them. Quack Camera Pricky Donkhead |
|
| Last Updated: 9/16/04 |
 |
| NOTE FROM THE EDITOR |
| 9/16/04 Sorry people.. I cant think of any new things that should go to the dimension... My pet seal says that I am running out of business here. uh oh.... |
| If Kitty Carlisle married Conway Twitty, she'd be Kitty Twitty. If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Oprah Chopra. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John. |
| Quotes: Silly Ones |
| Hey, Princess, you wouldn't happen to know where a lonely knight could scabbard his sword, would you? Dost thou know? That chastity best of yurs would look great on my sleeping chambers floor. Wench: What's that sound? Knight: That's just the sound of my chain mail drawers expanding. You won't believe this but St. George just appeared to me in a vision and told me that I must bed you...the fate of England depend is on it!! Yes, fair maiden, I am indeed a wizard. Shall I make your clothes disappear? You know, I was once imprisoned in a tower very much like Repunnzel. Only it wasn't my hair that the queen asked me to let down. |
| Equal |
| "Equal" is not always synonymous with "the same". Men and women are created equal. But, boys and girls are not born the same. 1. You throw a little girl a ball, and it will hit her in the nose. You throw a little boy a ball, and he will try to catch it. Then it will hit him in the nose. 2. You dress your little girl in her Easter Sunday best, and she'll look just as pretty when you finally make it to church an hour later. You dress a boy in his Easter Sunday best, and he'll somehow find every mud puddle from your home to church, even if you're driving there. 3. Boys' rooms are usually messy. Girls' rooms are usually messy, except it's a good smelling mess. 4. A baby girl will pick up a stick and look in wonderment at what nature has made. A baby boy will pick up a stick and turn it into a gun. 5. When girls play with Barbie and Ken dolls, they like to dress them up and play house with them. When boys play with Barbie and Ken dolls, they like to tear off their appendages. 6. Boys couldn't care less if their hair is unruly. If their bangs got cut a quarter-inch too short, girls would rather lock themselves in their room for two weeks than be seen in public. 7. Baby girls find mommy's makeup and almost instictively start painting their face. Baby boys find mommy's makeup and almost instinctively start painting the walls. 8. If a girl accidently burps, she will be embarrassed. If a boy accidently burps, he will follow it with a dozen fake belches. 9. Boys grow their fingernails long because they're too lazy to cut them. Girls grow their finger nails long - not because they look nice - but because they can dig them into a boy's arm. 10. Girls are attracted to boys, even at an early age. At early age, boys are attracted to dirt. 11. By the age of 6, boys will stop giving their dad kisses. By the age of 6, girls will stop giving their dad kisses unless he bribes them with candy. 12. Most baby girls talk before boys do. Before boys talk, they learn how to make machine-gun noises. 13. Girls will cry if someone dies in a movie. Boys will cry if you turn off the VCR after they've watched "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" movie three times in a row. |
| Short Books |
| Amelia Earhart's Guide to the Pacific Ocean America's Most Popular Lawyers Career Opportunities for History Majors Detroit - A Travel Guide Different Ways to Spell "Bob" Dr. Kevorkian's Collection of Motivational Speeches Easy UNIX |
| The Three Best-Known Western Names in China |
| Jesus Christ Richard Nixon Elvis Presley |
| Shirt Sayings |
| "So few men, so few can afford me" "God made us sisters, Prozac made us friends" "If they don't have chocolate in heaven, I ain't going" "Princess, Having Had Sufficient Experience with Princes, Seeks Frog" Senior Citizen: "Give me my damn discount" "I didn't climb to the top of the food chain to be vegetarian" |
|
| Click here to go to my Home Page. =) |
 |
| Learn Chinese! (racist ;) ) |
| Regular = English Italicized = Chinese That's not right Sum Ting Wong Are you harobring a fugitive? Hu Ya Hai Ding? See me ASAP Kum Hai Nao Stupid Man Dum Gai Small Horse Tai Ni P Ni Did you go to the beach? Wai Yu So Tan? I bumped into a coffe table. Ai Bang Mai Ni It's very dark hear. Wai So Dim? I thought you were on a diet. Wai Yu Mun Ching? This is a tow away zone. No Pah King Do you know the lyrics to the Macarena? Wai Yu Sing Dum? You are not very bright. Yu So Dum I got this for free. Ai No Pei Please stay a while longer. Wai Go Nao? Our meeting was scheduled for next week Wai Yu Kum Nao? They have arrived. Hia Dei Kum Your body odor is offenisive. Yu Stin Ki Pu |
| Top 5 Ways To Spend Your Money |
| Spend the money on Ant Poison to rid your house of giant squids. Spend the money on a large iron helmet to protect your head from oxygen. Spend the money on sour cream to build up your eye muscles. Spend the money on a broken radio so you can listen to lousy music anytime, anywhere. Spend the money on plastic chinaware so you can show off your richness. Give the money to the poor. If you have noticed, I wrote six ways - not five. ;] |
| - Space Intentionally Left Blank - |
| True Facts |
| Ants do not sleep. The earth experiences 50,000 earthquakes each year. Flamingos are not naturally pink. "Naked" means to be unprotected. "Nude" means unclothed. A common housefly lives for two weeks. Honey does not spoil. The onion is actually a lily. Mickey Mouse has only four fingers. The Statue of Liberty's Mouth is only 3 feet wide. We breathe 12 to 18 times a minute. Our mouths produce a quart of saliva a day. One out of every hunderd American citizens is color blind. Somewhere near 33 new consumer products are introduced each day. 13 of them are toys. Someone constructs 12 new golf holes everyday. |