My Mother our relationship and the day she died

Doris Isabel Foster ( Portus )

She was 86 when she died , my brother and myself had to decide to turn of the life support , I stroked her hair as she took her last breath , it was like being there for a birth , just the other end of life , and I was glad that I could be there for her at that time . I miss my Mother very much , the kisses and hugs are no more , and her unconditional love .

Just want to say I LOVE YOU MUM , and thank you .

Your relationship with your mother is always different from that of any one else , and I was not different in that .

I used to hang of my mother like I was part of her , hiding behind her if I was scared or some one talked to me , she was my protector . She protected me from the world and from my brother ( who is 11 years older than me )

My Mother never hurt any one in her life , but didn't really have a good life her self . She had a drunk husband , 2 sons , a daughter who died at 18 months old , she made every ones dinner and lunches breakfast , washed all our cloths and ironed them . I was looked after so much , and didn't think any thing of it , but always said thank you , and please , I loved her very much .

As we get older and go through our own changes , we move away , and then go back to them , and Mothers are always there , my Mother put up with all of that , as well as 4 nervous breakdowns , and even after I some times didn't treat her as well as I should , she was there to forgive , and love me as if nothing had gone on .

For nearly 20 years I was the main care person in her life , shopping , doctors, paying bills etc. , and used to complain that my brother did a lot less , and some times during my breakdowns it was very hard to look after some one when I could not even look after myself , seems selfish now she is gone.

Two years before she died I used to spend a lot of time there , 3 months before I used to go around every day , I knew some thing was not right , but doctors said its ok , but I knew different . I don't know how I knew , I just always knew when it was not right . Twice before over the years I had realized that some thing was up , Once she would have been dead had I not just taken her to the hospital , my brother was there and he could not work out why I was so worried , he said she looked ok . The hospital was about 10 minutes drive and by the time we got there she was starting to get really sick , they rushed her in as soon as they saw her ( they said later that another 5 min and she would have died ) . How did I know ?? I don't know , I just did .

But the last time I missed it , ( didn't really miss it , I just believed what the doctors said ) and to make it worse , I worked over time until 1-30 the next morning , that's 19 1/2 hour shift , and didn't make sure that some one called past to check on her . She spent almost 2 days on the floor , and it was cold , before some one noticed the papers out the front and broke in and called the ambulance .

After 5 days in hospital , my Mother died , 8 th may 2001 at 2-34 pm .

Miss you MUM