“My mouth feels like I’ve been eating twigs,” said Rosa, as she woke up cradling her frying pan.

“And thistles,” added Gretel.  “Where did these come from?” she asked, brushing herself off.

“The engine’s gone.”  Chevy looked around.

The rest woke to similar complaints.  It took long drinks from Chevy’s hydraulic barrel before the dryness was gone.  The mud on them would have to wait until they found a place to wash.

The tunnel was still bright.  The moonbeams, that entered before the mine closed, were still bouncing back and forth from diamond to diamond, giving the walls a pleasant glow.

They were safe - until a buzzing came from somewhere in the tunnel and they were attacked by a swarm of bees.

“Be mine!” grumbled Mimi, as she and Hansel hurried along the shaft with the others.  “You couldn’t just wish for a diamond mine.  You had to add ‘be mine’.”

“But I didn’t want this kind of bee.  There’s a difference.”

 “I never realized before, but wishes must be phonetic.  OUCH!”

They escaped the bees just as they came upon a body of water.  They stopped just as the light was fading.

“I’m sure I saw a lake,” said Rosa in the dark.  She was standing still; afraid she might fall in.  “Wouldn’t it be wonderful to bathe and clean our clothes?”

“Hansel,” ordered Mimi.  “Strike your flint.”

The single spark from his flint glowed for several minutes against the diamond-laden walls.

Before them was a lake in the center of the cavern.  But it didn’t cover the whole ground.  Paths allow passage around either side, disappearing into tunnels at the far end.  Rocks at that far edge looked like they would be useful to sit and undress before entering the water to bathe.

“There’s not enough room for everyone at the same time,” Mimi decided, as she surveyed the lake in the light of another spark.  “So the girls will bathe first.”  Without waiting for discussion, they walked around to the far side and allowed the light to fade.

“EEK!”

Hansel accidentally struck his flint while the girls were undressing.

Mimi pulled up her dress and marched back around the lake, taking the flint from Hansel, while Rosa and Gretel hid behind the rocks.  She held out her hand to the rest of them.  Sheepishly they all handed her their flints.  She walked back in the dark.

“EEK!”

In the unwelcome light, Hombre offered up his sword, which had accidentally struck a diamond in the darkness.

With a scowl on her face, Mimi marched back around and confiscated all their weapons.

Soon splashing, laughing, and giggling could be heard from across the lake.  An hour later, it was still going on.

“I don’t know about the rest of you,” said Chris, “but I don’t think I have that many body parts to wash.”

“No,” Randolph agreed.  “And I prefer showers; in and out in two minutes tops.  Why I’m dry before the water leaves the drain.”

“Same here,” said Hombre.

“I don’t know how long I take,” said Chevy.  “I’ve never had a bath before.”

Llywarch differed.  “Some of us have more hair to wash,” he said, displaying his cornrows.

“How about the girls being afraid of what we might see?”  Randolph mused.  “Women are so modest.  We wouldn’t be embarrassed, if that happened to us.”

“No way!”  The others agreed.  Men were much braver.

They all jumped when Mimi suddenly appeared before them striking a flint.

“We’re finished,” she said.  Not only was Mimi clean, with her hair washed and brushed; but her dress was freshly laundered.  When the men looked across, they could see Rosa and Gretel also clean with laundered clothing.  They looked lovely, sitting on the rocks and waving.

“It’s your turn.”

“Can we trade sides,” Randolph asked.

“No,” replied Mimi.  “Those rocks are perfect for doing laundry.  I’ll wait here until the light fades, then you’ll take off your clothes and I’ll take them to be cleaned.  You’ll have them back before you get out of the water.”

“You can do all that in two minutes?” asked Chris.

“You’ll wash longer than that,” Mimi informed them.

“Can we have our flints and weapons back?”

“No.  I’ll bring them back with the clothes.  And you will bathe until then.”

“What if they accidentally go off?”

“That won’t bother me, I’m a married woman and I understand men are never embarrassed.”

Hansel, as the only married man among them, knew they would be in trouble if they didn’t take long baths.

When the light faded, they started to disrobe, handing their clothes over in the dark.

 “If we try to get out too soon, she’ll strike a flint, won’t she?”  Randolph whispered to Hansel, but everyone in the cave heard it, as the question echoed off the walls.

He didn’t have to answer.  Giggling from across the lake confirmed it.

The men were just about to step into the lake when…

WHOOSH!

There was a flash of lightning, a cloud of smoke, the roar of thunder…and Llywarch disappeared, leaving a bright cavern behind him.

They hit the water in a hurry, ducking under for as long as they could hold their breath.  There was more giggling from the far side, until the light faded.

When the girls finished cleaning the clothes, Mimi brought them back, along with the flints and weapons, and laid them on the ground.

But the men didn’t get out.  What if Llywarch returned while they were dressing?

The ladies didn’t grow impatient.  Soft snoring could be heard from that side.

“Now I know what a raisin feels like,” said Chris, as his skin shriveled.  “I am going to risk it.”  He started to climb out of the water when…

WHOOSH!

There was a flash of lightning, a cloud of smoke, and the roar of thunder.  And Llywarch was back.

He was wearing a white flour sack with “Morris and son” printed on the side.  His robe and hat left behind were laundered and folded on the ground before him.

Chris was fast.  Only the briefest glimpse of his backside could be seen before he hit the water.

“A christening,” Llywarch sputtered.  “I appeared like this at a baby’s christening.”

“That sounds awful, Uncle Larry,” said Chris, from neck deep in the lake.

“It was awful,” replied Llywarch.  “If I had known, I’d have at least combed my hair.  Even so, the women all loved my braids.  By the way Christopher, you are a new uncle.  Kevin finally had a boy.”  He pointed to the sack he was wearing, where it read “and son”.

“Would you like to see what he looks like?”  Llywarch held up a pecan.  And the girls came around to see.  The men crouched lower in the water.

The women oohed and awed for a minute.  Then Rosa asked, “Are we supposed to be able to see the baby in that nut?”

Llywarch was taken back.  “Oh, I forgot.  But you know what?  At this age he looks a lot like a nut, anyway.

The women oohed and awed some more.

At last the light faded and there was a scramble as the men started to dress.  When Hombre’s sword, again, struck the wall, there was a frantic finish; pulling things up, buttoning them, and tying knots.

After they were dressed, they drove the oxcart over to the rocks where everyone sat and ate what was left of the food from Italy.  They were famished having eaten nothing but twigs and mud in the last three days.

“It was like you said,” Llywarch told Mimi between bites.  “The clergyman who did the christening has a wife from France.  She doesn’t speak English and he doesn’t speak French, but they understand each other because they’re in love.  He earned a wish,” Llywarch added, with his mouth full.  “Now he’s the Archbishop of Cornwall.”

“That’s what true love is like,” answered Mimi, smiling at Hansel

“Well, I hope that doesn’t become common,” grumbled Llywarch.  “It would put translators out of business.”

Randolph was sitting near Gretel.  She appeared to be over the mime’s death, laughing and smiling as she ate, dipping her hand into the lake to drink.

 Hansel banged his flint several times, to get everyone’s attention.  Then he stood amongst the darting beams to make a speech.  Lifting his hand cupped with water, he said, “I think we owe a toast to Mimi.  She saved us all by pulling us into this mine.”

“Hear!  Hear!” said the others.

“It was your doing, too,” replied Mimi, blushing.  “You made the wish.”

“He could have left out the part about bees,” complained Rosa, who was smarting in several places.

Gretel dipped her hand into the water to join in the toast and pulled out a white glove.  “Oh dear,” she said.

Randolph felt his pocket.  It was empty!

Rosa grabbed it.  “This looks like the mime’s glove.  I thought you lost it.”

“Wasn’t that glove a different color?” Randolph suggested.

“No,” Mimi joined in.  “It was white.  I remember.”

“But this is too large,” Randolph insisted.  “The mime was much smaller, hardly a man at all.”

“He was big enough to fight and die.” replied Gretel.  “I wonder how this got here.  It must be a sign.  I shall always remember him.”

Randolph’s heart sank.

Rosa had her opinion about how the glove got there.  That was where she washed Chris’s clothes.  She gave him a dirty look.

What did I do now? he wondered.

“Why do you have to remember him?” Randolph wanted to know.

Before she could answer, the glow faded and a buzzing came up behind them.  The bees were back.

They all fled down different tunnels.

“I think we’re lost, “ said Mimi, after she and Hansel at last outran the bees.

He struck his flint.  “The last time Gretel and I were in a situation like this, we left bread crumbs to mark our trail.”

“Oh?” replied Mimi.  “I am sorry I don’t have any.  Will this do?” she asked, offering him a partially eaten chicken leg.

*          *          *

“This tunnel is too small,” said Rosa, as she and Chris crawled through the hole they had taken to escaped the bees.

He struck his flint, pausing to admire the sight of Rosa crawling in front of him.  “Small tunnels are often a miner complaint.”

“You’re still not funny, Christopher.  Why did you steal that mime’s glove?”  She stood after the tunnel grew and waved her pan in his face.  It was splattered with bees.  “Do you love Gretel that much?”

“What?  You think I stole that glove?”  Chris climbed to his feet, dusting himself off.  “What would I do with one glove?  That’s not even a set.”

“For sentimental reasons, of course, because Gretel’s so beautiful.  …I suppose if I were beautiful, you would steal my red scarf?”

“But you are beautiful…Say you can understand me and Uncle Larry’s not around.  I think you’re in love with me,” he said, as the light faded.

Rosa was aghast!  She was glad the tunnel was dark, so Chris couldn’t see her face.

He re-struck the flint.

“What did you say?”  She pretended.  “We must have passed out of Larry’s range because I don’t understand a word you say.”

“But we left Uncle Larry way back there.”

The tunnel went dark again.

“I am sorry, I still don’t understand,” Rosa lied.  “I suppose Larry must have been in a nearby tunnel that took a sudden turn away from us.”

“That makes sense,“ Christopher had to admit.  “Wait!  I can understand you.”

Rosa smiled in the dark.  So he loved her.  But then why did he steal mime’s glove?  Wasn’t that just like a man?  He’d just fallen in love and already he was a two-timing cheat.  Besides disobeyed his parents and telling bad jokes, he was a glove thief.  And he was Welsh to boot, not even tempered by being a wizard like Larry and Chevy.  What did he do for a living?  He was a first mate.  Not a captain, just a mate on a boat.  No, she corrected herself.  It was not a boat; it was a ship – but a tiny little ship.

Well, she couldn’t stay in love with him and she wouldn’t let him stay in love with her.  She’d see to that.  She’d give him no encouragement…if only she did not understand him.

“But I can still understand you,” Chris repeated.

Try and understand this, she thought.  She recalled what Chevy told her in the valley, “A Hemi engine is a four-stroke engine with a camshaft that has a timing ratio of 1 to 2.  It’s a 420 cubic inch V-8 engine with 399 horse power, an 8 to1 compression ratio, and 400 pounds of torque.”

 “What?  I didn’t understand that,” he admitted.  I guess I was mistaken.  I’m not in love after all.”  He sighed.

Somehow that didn’t make Rosa feel better.  “That’s typical of a man, not knowing his own heart,” she muttered

“Wait a minute.  I understood that!”

Oops!  Thinking quickly, Rosa added, “Knit one, purl two…double the loop and draw the needle through.”

“That makes no sense either!”

Good!  In the dark, Rosa shoved her red scarf into his pocket.

*          *          *

“Can you strike a light?” Gretel asked Randolph.

When he did, they were alone.   “We lost everyone.  I wonder where they went?” he asked.

“I am sorry,” responded Gretel.  “I can’t understand what you said.”

“I asked, where did everybody go?”

“We must have lost Larry.”  Gretel looked around.  “Because we don’t understand each other.”

But he understood her, Randolph realized.  Blimey!  “Are you sure you don’t understand me?” he asked

“What?”  Gretel looked at him in confusion.

Maybe she’s pretending, he hoped, as the light faded.

As they walked on in the dark, he felt a draft to his left and knew the tunnel had turned.  “We better head this way,” he said.

“Ow! “  Not understanding, Gretel walked into the wall.

Randolph caught the hand that was holding the mime’s glove and pulled her down the path.  Gretel continued holding his hand, with the glove between them, as she talked. “I wish I could understand you, Randy.  It would be nice to be in love.  Hansel and Mimi are so happy.  I want that.  I wonder if I could have loved the mime.”

Randolph flinched.

“Oops,” said Gretel.  “I keep forgetting you’re so tall.  Did you bump your head?”

“Yes.  I bumped my head,” Randolph lied.

“I still don’t understand.  But I’m so glad you’re with me.  It’s nice to have a friend to talk to, even one that doesn’t understand me.”

“Yes I can!” answered Randolph.

“Just so,” agreed Gretel.  “It’s like having a brother to talk to.”

 A BROTHER!  Randolph smashed his fist against a wall and the tunnel turned bright, as the ring on his finger struck a diamond.  He changed his scowl into a smile.  Gretel was giving him a questioning look.  By the time the light faded, his jaw and his heart ached.

*          *          *

The largest swarm followed Llywarch, Chevy, and Hombre, as they hurried down a tunnel wide enough to take the oxcart and animals.

“OUCH!  I wish these bees didn’t have stingers,” said Hombre.

First Llywarch heard ringing in his ear.  And Chevy added, “I hear ringing in my ear.”

Then bees started to bounce.

“That was a waste of a wish,” said Llywarch.

“I didn’t realize that I’d done a kindness,” admitted Hombre.

“You’re always kind,” insisted Chevy.

“I guess so,” admitted Hombre, ”I just don’t make wishes very often.”

“That explains why you’re out of practice,” answered Llywarch, as the frustrated bees knocked his hat off and started bouncing up and down on it.

“What’s this,” asked Chevy, as he bumped into an object in the dark.  He struck a flint.

Before them was a miner’s cart on a pair of steel tracks that ran downhill.

“I have never seen anything like this before,” Hombre said, bending down and touching the gray bars.

“I have,” said Llywarch.  “But they are not supposed to be invented yet.  They should still be wooden.”

“What are those things on the ground call?”

“Train tracks.”

“Tracks?” repeated Hombre.  “If those are tracks, I’d hate to meet the train that made them.

Chevy tied the animals and the cart to the back and said, “Hop in.  Let’s ride it!”

Llywarch picked up his hat and sat in the back with his arms dangling over the sides.  Hombre and Chevy climbed in after him.  Llywarch’s request was, “Go slowly, please.”

But the frustrated bees regrouped.  And they bounced against the cart with such force that it took off in a flash.

“Wooo!” the riders cried.  Llywarch’s beard lost its string and divided in the middle, flapping behind him on both sides of his face.  His cornrows were streaming straight back, as they descended into the dark abyss of the tunnel.

*          *          *

“These bees are starting to bounce,” Mimi insisted, over the angry buzz of frustrated bees.

“You know, it feels good…right there by the shoulder.  What do you think these rails are for?” Hansel asked, as the light faded.

There came a rumbling behind them, but before Hansel could re-strike his flint, the container hit.  They flipped over its edge and landed inside with the others.  Llywarch’s knuckles were white as he gripped the sides.  Mimi was afraid to do more than peer over one side.  On sharp turns, the container nicked the walls.  But their speed was such that they outraced the light it caused, leaving glowing spots behind them

“Wooo!”  They continued.  Sometimes making sharp turns to the left and then to the right, as they went from tunnel to tunnel.   Of course it was impossible, but once it seemed like they looped upside down.  The force was such that no one could sit upright.

*          *          *

Randolph picked up Gretel determined to outrun the next attack of bees.  Using instincts gained from combat, he swerved each time, just before the bees struck.  They could be heard in the dark angrily buzzing as they missed time and time again.  Gretel clung on tightly.  Her breath deliciously tickling his ear, as she told him that she thought he was as brave as her brother – or even the mime.

Randolph struck his head on a low spot in the tunnel and fell backwards with Gretel on top.

He uttered just one word.

“Oh dear,” said Gretel, lifting her head.  “I don’t know think I want to know what that meant.”

As he heard the bees, Randolph pulled her down and sprawled over her to protect her.  He knew they were surrounded and he was prepared to take the stings in his back.

WAIT!  It felt like they were bouncing.

“You are so brave,” said Gretel, beneath him.  “I hope you’re not hurting too badly.”

Actually it felt good.  He’d never been able to scratch that spot.

A rumbling came from behind them.  Now what?  If those were more bees, they were bigger and angrier than he ever wanted to meet.  He re-picked Gretel and began to run again.  But before he could take even a step they were hit.  Gretel landed in the container and Randolph behind it - astride Rex.  He put the glove he in his pocket for safe keeping, promising himself he would return it this time.

*          *          *

 “Watch where you are swinging that pan,” Chris yelled at Rosa in the dark.

“What did you say?” replied Rosa.  “I can’t understand you.  Hold still.  I think I hear a bee on your head.”

Chris ducked as he heard the swish in the dark.

Rosa struck a wall and the cave lit up to the sight of angry, stinger-less bees.

“Those bees don’t have any stingers!”

“What?” said Rosa.  “Of course they do.  Hold still.  I can see the one on your head clearly now.”

But Christopher wouldn’t hold still.  He turned and ran down a side tunnel, followed by Rosa and the bees.

WHAM!  They collided with the container.  Rosa landed inside and Chris ended up on Harley.  He could feel the hog’s hooves churning frantically to keep up.

A thick cloud enveloped them in the dark, so that no flint could give them light, and dust settled upon them.  Things started dropping in the cart, ricocheting against its sides before settling on the bottom.

They escaped the cloud and sunlight appeared ahead of them.  They exited the mine and entered a wood.  Soon they ran out of track, still they coasted into the Black Forest until they hit a tree and tipped over.

Coal dust billowed around them as they tumbled onto the ground followed by a pile of diamonds and a single lump of coal.

When they looked up, they were surrounded by seven angry dwarfs.