THE THOUGHTS OF CHAIRMAN MUSTARD
Here is my collection of notions...
They say it's better the devil you know than the devil you don't, but I find it better to know no devils at all, as they are, by their very nature, unpleasant.
We are told that you can't tell a book by its cover, but if you happen to take a glance at the title, it should generally give you a pretty good idea.
When attempting to use a tightrope, the common advice is, "Don't look down!" This could not be further from the truth. The most useful advice is "Don't fall off!" I often shout this aloud when I visit circuses with Ricky Tomlinson.
They say out of sight, out of mind, but can we really forget Archer that easily?
They say nothing can exist in a vacuum, but if so, where do the dust mites go?
What's so good about the top notch? Aren't the ones further down just as good, if not better? If not, there's got to be some dodgy notch-work going on that trading standards should be made aware of!
Biscuit barrels - they're not barrels, they're jars!