Well the last time we have heard anything from PCW’s Resident Moron, Ken Kaze, Zurick, and Kaze’s trustworthy and faithful, chromed companion, George~! was when Kaze mistaken December 20 for New Year’s Eve. Though he soon found out that he was not only celebrating New Year too early, but he was also celebrating the wrong year. Kaze thought it was going to be the millennium! The dolt thought it was going to be the millennium for heaven’s sake! He definitely lived up to his nickname of PCW’s Resident Moron. But not only that, he discussed his match on Friday Fusion with none other than his very tag partner Zurick, as well as George~!
The scene opens up to Ken Kaze and George~!, but no Zurick. It seems like for once, Kaze has decided to go a day without Zurick. Very odd. Very odd indeed. For the past few days, Kaze and Zurick have been caught together no matter what, discussing their tag team match on Fusion. Kaze is wearing blue jean pants, New Balance sneakers, and a gray sweater. In front of him is none other than everyone’s favorite ice cream parlor, Dairy Queen. Kaze enters the Dairy Queen. Due to it being around 11 o’clock p.m., there is only one other customer inside besides Kaze himself. An elderly lady sitting down at a table, licking away at a half melted, chocolate ice cream cone. Kaze walks straight up to the counter and is greeted by a pimply faced teenaged boy.
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “Welcome to Dairy Queen. How may I help you?”
Kaze ignores him at first. He sets George~! down beside him and begins whispering to him.
Ken Kaze: “He looks like that Pimply Faced Intern Kid in PCW. Don’t cha think so, George~!?”
The pimply faced teenaged boy looks at Kaze as if he were some sort of moron... which he is, by the way.
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “Um... sir. I’m gonna have to ask you to take that trashcan outside.”
Kaze looks up from George~! with a bright red face. It’s obvious Kaze is furious. He slams his fists down onto the counter and stares into the boy’s eyes.
Ken Kaze: “George~!..... is NOT.... A TRASHCAN!!!!!!”
The other employees working in the back hear the shouting and all stare at Kaze immediately. Meanwhile, the pimply faced teenaged boy back steps away from Kaze. Kaze stares at the employees who are staring at him as well.
Ken Kaze: “What’re you all looking at?! Huh?!?!”
Kaze’s quick snap at the employees forces them back to work instantly, taking their eyes off of him and not daring to lay eyes on him once more. By this time, the elderly lady that was once sitting down at a table has already left due to the ruckus thus far.
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “Well-weh-weh-well, sir. What’ll it be-buh-buh-be?”
Kaze looks down at George~!
Ken Kaze: “What d’ya want, George~!?”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Good choice.”
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “What did he say?”
Ken Kaze: “He said he wanted a chocolate-vanilla mixed, ice cream cone with sprinkles. I’ll take......”
Kaze skims the menu that hangs from the ceiling with his eyes fast. His eyes move so fast, it’s hard to keep up with them!
Ken Kaze: “......Um... I guess the same as George~! here.”
The pimply faced teenaged boy quickly types up the information given to him by Kaze on the electronic cash register.
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “That’ll be $6.34.”
Kaze reaches into his pocket and pulls out a brown leather wallet. He flips it open quickly and scrambles through the cash. Most of everything he has are one hundred dollar bills. The pimply faced teenaged boy stares at the money mesmerized by the huge amount of money. Kaze pulls out a ten dollar bill and slaps it down on the counter. He folds up his wallet quickly and inserts it back into his pocket. The pimply faced teenaged boy grabs the ten dollar bill and begins to type away on the cash register. He hits a one final button and the cash drawer pops open as it processes a receipt. He places the ten dollar bill into the cash register and pulls out some dollar bills as well as coin change. He tears of the receipt, places it into Kaze’s hand, and lays the money on top.
Pimply Faced Teenaged Boy: “$3.66 is your change sir. Have a nice day, sir. Just take a seat at any table and we’ll bring you your order as soon as possible.”
Ken Kaze: “Um... thanks.”
Kaze slides the money and receipt into the opposite pocket he placed his wallet. He picks up George~! and walks over to a booth which is against a wall. He places George~! on one side and sits down on the other. Kaze pivots his elbows on the surface of the table and rests his chin on his hands, looking at George~!
Ken Kaze: “Man. I haven’t seen Zurick all day. What about you?”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Same luck, eh? No worries. I’m sure Zurick went to the gym earlier today to get some training in or something. Not like he needs it anyway.”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “What d’ya mean Zurick sucks? Zurick is God! How can God suck?!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “No, George~! You can’t JUST suck....... .......okay, maybe you can. That’s obvious by looking at Young Toga and his Six Chicken Fingers.”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Oh yeah. I KNOW me and Zurick are gonna pummel those two crap-fest of wrestlers! I’ve seen Young Yoga’s and his Six Chicken Fingers’ work in Eternal Wrestling. Believe me, I wasn’t impressed.”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Of course I’m better than them. They SUCK!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “What d’ya mean I shouldn’t be worried about them? I’m not.”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “WHAT?! A match on Turmoil!?”
Kaze’s eyes look like they are ready to burst out of his head like cannons; his head ready to explode into millions of pieces.
George~!: “.................”
Kaze then, all of a sudden, calms down, returning back to normal.
Ken Kaze: “So that’s the good thing about it.”
A smile broadens across Kaze’s face. It‘s obvious he now realizes that he may have a chance to win the.....
Ken Kaze: “....Primetime Championship Wrestling Extreme Champion!!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “What the heck’s a Santa’s Playground match?”
George~!: “.................”
Kaze shrugs.
Ken Kaze: “I guess I’ll just have to wait and see when it happens. But obviously we’ll be allowed to use weapons! And other people can help you out as well! That’s where you come in, George~!”
Another smile widens across Kaze’s face due to his knowledge of extreme matches. Kaze is a former Extreme Champion, but that was in the New True Internet Championship Wrestling promotion. NTICW didn’t have the same competition as PCW does now, even though some of the top talent, including Kaze, moved onto PCW.
Ken Kaze: “I know I can win this match! I’m a former NTICW Extreme Champ! There’s nothin’ stoppin’ me from becomin’ the PCW Extreme Champ!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “WHAT?!?”
Kaze’s face now looks like it is ready to explode once more.
Ken Kaze: “What do you MEAN there are nineteen others in this match?! Are they tryin’ to kill me by forcing me against all of these people?! Who’s in the match anyway?!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Check inside you? Um.... okay.”
Kaze shrugs. He stands from his seat and reaches over the table into George~! He scrambles around in George~! for a while and pulls out a paper. The paper is an exact copy of the Tuesday Turmoil card that has been pushed back onto Wednesday yet again. This being the first time ever to have two, consecutive Tuesday Turmoil cards pushed back. Kaze sits back down and reads off the list of names of wrestlers that will be participating in the Santa’s Playground match.
Ken Kaze: “Badge. The current PCW Extreme Champ. If he loses to Miyagawa on Fusion, that may mean this match won’t be for the PCW Extreme title! Man, oh, man. Badge better win! Or I’ll have to beat him senseless in this Santa’s Playground match!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Yeah. I’m not too worried that Badge will lose to Miya. So I’m almost positive I’ll walk out PCW Extreme Champion on Turmoil. Next is Corey Williams. Well, I don’t know much about him except that he’s a former Extreme Champ wanting his title back, so I’m not too worried about him. After all, he is a FORMER Champ.”
Kaze smiles due to his arrogant remark. Which is quite odd seeing as Kaze isn’t one to be known as the cocky, or egotistic, or arrogant type of people.
Ken Kaze: “Next is Big Bubba McCoy. Well, I don’t know much about Bubba except that he lost on Turmoil and literally got his ass kicked. So he’s no challenge. Then there’s the Pharaoh, a man who I faced before in NTICW. Though, in the match, none of us came out the victor, so he can’t consider himself better than me right yet. Next is Orpheus Grant. Hmm.... why does that name sound so familiar? Wait! I know! He’s that moron who doesn’t know how to talk!”
Kaze bursts into laughter at his own joke, which isn’t really funny at all.
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Okay. Okay. I’ll calm down. Next we have Big Daveynotdelicious. Big D. B Dave. Davey Bitchilicious. ARRRGH! I don’t CARE what his name is! It starts with a B and ends with a D!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “What d’ya mean it ends with an S? Just leave me alone, George~! Gosh!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “So anyway, next is Tom Walczak. Heeeeyyy. I remember that guy from the Fighting Zone. He got his boo-tay kicked every time! Next there is the man who ROCKS~! .......And also the man who jobbed to Sexual Harassment Panda at Alliances!! Ha, ha! You remember that George~!?”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Oh. You don’t. So anyway, next is Kevin Klaymore. Who is that?”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “Yeah. I don’t care either. Let’s see here...... there’s that stupid Goth freak, Darkstar; the infamous PCW jobber, HANK~!; some guy who’s a plumber; the Rock. The ROCK! I can’t believe this! The Rock is in PCW! Whooo hoooo! He was my favorite WWF wrestler!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “RVD sucked!”
George~!: “.................”
Ken Kaze: “I’m not even gonna bother to argue with you today, George~! Anyway, back to my match. There’s some stupid robot; two brothers named AJ Storm -- hey, I’ve heard of him -- and “Amazing” Mike Storm -- who? --; and three women. Brandi, Sassy, and Kya Brady. I remember Kya. I had to fight her in the Primetime Wrestling Academy under the Hardcore Isosceles Trapezoid’s rule. But we never got to fight because I graduated to NTICW. Oh well.”
All of a sudden, the pimply faced teenaged boy who was at the cash register earlier walks up to Kaze and George~! with two, chocolate-vanilla mixed, ice cream cones with sprinkles. He hands one to Kaze and sets down the other in front of George~! He then walks away as Kaze begins to lick away viciously on his ice cream cone.
Ken Kaze: “Eat up George~!”
The scene fades to black with Kaze licking and eating his ice cream cone.
