Fuck A Doodle Doo; This Is Dildopoint!

Characters: Ken Kaze, Sylo, & George the Trashcan

A breathtaking, spine-chilling breeze had turned the air into ice as a monster roamed through the backstage corridors, in an ironic hot pursuit for the squared circle in the center of the MTS Center in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Donned in a black sleeveless hooded sweater (or better known as a “hoody”), the hood had been drawn in order to keep the visage of the behemoth confidential.

The fiend had come to a halt at the Gorilla position, apparently awaiting his cue to emerge from the curtains. During his wait, the beast began to slightly jog in place, loosening up his muscles, causing his blood to course through his veins and arteries. He thrived from an adrenaline rush.

“SSSYYYYLLLOOOO!” a familiar voice was heard resonating throughout the halls. “WHERE ARRRREEEE YOOOUUUU?” The source of the voice was approaching closer as footsteps became well in earshot.

A low growl was produced from the hooded figure as the obnoxious voice continued to seek the Superbeast himself, Sylo. The owner of the shouting became evident as the Hero of Hardcore was seen walking swiftly toward the Gorilla position and the hooded brute, dragging George the Trashcan behind him. The depths of George seemed to have occupied something as an emission of a low rumble was perceived.

Ken Kaze had placed a hand onto the hooded animal’s hood before drawing it back, at last revealing whom this person was. From behind, traces of blue highlights blended in with pitch-black hair.

“Sylo?” Ken queried as he began to round onto the person. “Is that you?” He swiveled to the front side of the individual to acknowledge who indeed it was. As if the cold, icy blue eyes didn’t give it away, surely the baggy pants with a mixture of black and blue gave it away. After all, one leg was blue as opposed to the fact that the other was black; and the term “SYLO” was written in blue down the black leg.

“Ah ha!” Kaze exclaimed with a tone of success. “I’ve found you at last!”

Those bitter, still blue eyes narrowed slightly, obviously looking surprised. The Superbeast was ready to obliterate this man into a million pieces in only a few minutes time. And he dared to confront him prior to their scheduled wrestling match? A fool he was, and a fool he would be as they commenced battle and waged war within the confines of the very same wrestling ring.

“So, I just wanted to wish you luck. You know, since I’m winning and all,” Kaze said arrogantly. He was always one to be overconfident. Not that it was his fault, after all. He’s a moron. What would you expect?

“You’re a dead man!” Sylo roared. “Might wanna step back now, before I break your back until you’re tossing your own salad, retard.”

“FUCK A DOODLE DOO, GEORGE! DID YOU HEAR THAT? HE WANTS ME TO TOSS MY SALAD! EWWWWIESSSS, YOU FAGBOX. I ALWAYS KNEW YOU WERE A GAYBO!” Ken bellowed excitedly. “But I didn’t know you were as open as your cunt about it.” Jolt’s Resident Moron had now taken two steps toward the front of his adversary. He was standing face to . . . well, as usual . . . chest. If only Kaze wasn’t so short, the bastid. “Plus, shows how much you know, smart ass. How can I be a dead man? I’M NOT A ZOMBIE, YOU FUCKING MORONIC EEEEEEDIOTBOX!”

Just as soon as he executed an about face on his heel to grab a hold of George, Sylo’s right arm swung wildly in hooked fashion, looking to decapitate his idiotic foe with a bear-like claw swipe before their official match. Fortunately for the Hardcore Retard, he had doubled over in the nick of time to rummage through George and pull out the neon pink vibrator. Sylo’s hand connected with air, much to his displeasure, of course. Ken had turned around to point the vibrator into Sylo’s chest as if he were robbing the Superbeast at gunpoint. Only, this was dildopoint, mahfucka. Now, that’s gangster.

“You see this here? You’ll have your turn to play with it tonight, buddy boy fag-o.”

In an instant, Sylo had scooped Ken into the air and dumped him headfirst into George. Sylo lifted George, now occupied with the content that was Ken Kaze, into the air before throwing them through the curtains onto the stage.

Coincidentally, the opening to the Hero of Hardcore’s entrance music had just resonated throughout the public announce system.