The Capture of George
By Ken Kaze/Sgt. Henry W. Rowengarter
“You nailed him good, George!”
Ken Kaze was obviously commenting on his assault on John Gargano during Gargano’s King of Kage match against Kaze’s newest friend, Waldo “L33TD00D” Furkenzbaum.
“He’ll never give me another blowjob again! Haha, thanks George. I owe ya one.”
Silence.
“What do you MEAN he didn’t give me a blowjob? He frickin’ punched me in the balls, George! And all you did was sit there!”
Kaze looks at his trashcan compadre inquisitively.
“A low blow? You dirty whore, George! You have a filthy mind. I would never commit such a hein-e-ous crime like that. You know it’s illegal to be a homo! And you know I like the ladies, George. After all,” he pauses while setting George down on the ground. He then runs his hands through his hair, “I am… THE KAZERNATOR~!!! HEAR ME ROAR! ARRRRRR~!”
Kaze turns around and faces a wall that has a blue sign with the picture of a girl in a dress -- a female’s bathroom sign. He stares at it for a moment before looking down at George.
“Did you hear her George? She’s talking smack! OOOOH SNAP~! Now it’s time I bust out my Conan O’Brien impression.” He stares a hole into the bathroom sign before speaking once more. “You talkin’ to me? I said… are YOU… talkin’ to ME?!”
Kaze instinctively sends a right jab into the bathroom sign, dealing out some frustration.
“OOWW! OWWWEEEEE! GEORGE! I THINK SHE BROKE MY HAND, THE BITCH!”
Kaze drops to his knees cowering in pain while looking intently at George.
“NO I’M NOT GIVING UP TO A WOMAN!” He begins to whisper, “She’s a girl, George. A minor. Not a woo-man. A girl. They are the spawn of Satan, I tell you! Always wearing those short shorts, or those short mini skirts. With those real short, skimpy halter tops that stop right as they get to their big, juicy boobs -- unless they’re flat-chested! Then they just suck. And they’re luscious…. ….WHAT? Of course I’m not a frickin’ pedophile, George! You nasty bastid!”
Kaze looks down at his pants as he sees a small wet spot starting to gather.
“Oh sheet, George! I’ll be right back, I gots-ta take a piiiaassee! Now you stay here and don’t run away from me like you did earlier tonight. Okay? I’ll be right back. I mean it, George! Frickin’ A! Your ass better be out when I get out!”
Kaze stands up and looks at the “monstrous” female bathroom sign once more.
“I’ll get you when I come back!”
Kaze pushes through the door hinged next to the female bathroom sign.
Unbeknownst to poor Kaze, someone is watching him, watching for Kaze to make the wrong move. As Kaze goes after the woman, it is time to strike. Look at George, all alone with no one to protect him. This will teach George not to piss him off. He will never see the light of day again. He must pilfer and destroy what little conscience Kaze has.
It'll be simple. Take him in one...felt...swoop...This will teach them both not to fuck with him. This will teach them both not to piss off the wrong person.
This will teach them both not to get in his way of domination. Dominance is a must, and dominant he will be.
Kaze is heard whistling in the bathroom as a faucet can be heard running water.
“So George… you excited about tonight’s match?”
The running water comes to a halt as Kaze pushes back through the bathroom door (it’s an ambiswinger, okay?!). He glances down at George.
“So are ya?”
But George isn’t there. Kaze looks around his entire surroundings.
“GEORGE!! FUCKIN’ A, I’LL KICK YER ASS! I SWEAR! Stop playin’ games with me and come out.”
Silence.
“….George?”
