It’s a Sham! It’s a Travesty! It’s a Mockery! It’s a . . . TRAVESHAMOCKERY~!
Written by George, Jamar, & Richie (ft. Back Alley Brawler, Geo Vacton, Ken Kaze, Love!Love! KAMIKAZE!!!, & Mittens T. Cat)
Geo Vacton appeared on the RaveTron, stepping out of the smoke-filled catacombs of Back Alley Brawler's lair. He held in his hands a large amount of money, presumably the money that he won by betting against Ken Kaze in his match with JCON. Geo took a look around and looked down at his wrist watch.
"C'mon, I'm tired of this…"
Just as he was about to grow restless and walk off, someone else appeared on screen.
"Hey-low, dude."
It was Ken Kaze, fresh off of his loss to JCON in his qualifying round for the Triple Crown Tournament, courtesy of his nemesis the Back Alley Brawler. However, despite the loss he had just attained, he seemed to be in a cheerful mood. Quite odd for someone opposite of the victor.
"Where's your trashcan? Er . . . Jos —"
"George?" Ken queried, interrupting Geo. "Oh, he's chillin' in the locker room. He's not quite happy with the loss, nor with the Brawler getting involved. But I told him, 'Hey, remember our insurance policy?' and he just blew me off. Whatever, though, heh."
"Okay. Well, here's your money, man." Geo Vacton handed Kaze the money and began to walk off.
"Hey! Wait!" Kaze stopped Geo. "Here's your cut, dude. I owe you, man."
Geo looked down at the money being offered to him. In a quick count, it was about two thousand dollars. "Nah, keep it. I don't need it. Besides, that's dirty money. I don't want any dirty money."
Ken Kaze looked at the money and inspected it. "It don't look too dirty to me, man."
Geo cocked his head to the side. "Eh, just keep it, bro."
"Sup, bro?! My moolah not good enough for you? Ah, man. Know what dude, suit yourself… Just means more money for me, DUDE!"
Geo looked at Kaze with a blank expression. "That dude and man stuff is getting pretty weird, man."
Kaze laughed in Geo's face, and headed into the direction of Back Alley Brawler's lounge. He began to choke as the clouds of smoke were quickly inhaled into his lungs. Turning their attention to the coughing being discharged from the door, the entire vicinity of people went silent. It was almost as if they had all seemingly lost their voices and could not emit a sound. Rather, it was due to whom the coughing was coming from – Ken Kaze. Immediately, the environment became hostile as the Brawler stood up from behind his desk.
"What'chu want, punk?" barked the Brawler. "Didn' like da treatmen' ya got earlier?" He grinned.
However, Ken countered BAB's grin with his own smirk. "Actually, partnuh, I did." He waved the bundles of money in his hands in front of the Brawler.
"An' what da f(BEEP!) is dat?" BAB questioned. "Some f(BEEP!)in' Monopoly money or somethin'? Ya here to make a bet? Ya know, jackass, we don' accept dat s(BEEP!). Go somewhere else wit dat. Plus, even if it was real, I still wouldn' accept it. Just becuz you a punk azz b(BEEP!). Now be gone lil beeyotch."
Ken laughed surreptitiously.
"What's so funny, d(BEEP!)kweed?" Mittens butted in.
Ken, just now noticing Mittens was even in the same arena as he was, rapidly replied, "HOLY BALLS! IT'S LORD F(BEEP!)IN' ZEDD DRESSED IN A PINK PANTHER COSTUME! AND THAT'S YOUR STAFF!" Seemingly out of thin air, Ken had pulled out his plastic toy Mighty Morphin Power Rangers morpher, as well as the Green Ranger's Dragon flute. "YOUR STAFF STANDS NO CHANCE AGAINST THE DRAGON FLUTE! IT'S MORPHIN TIME! GO, STEGASAURUS!" He held out the plastic morpher in front of him with both hands, squatting a tad bit, almost as if he were trying to get into the Power Ranger fighting stance.
"S(BEEP!) on that, dumb c(BEEP!)k. This ain't no staff, it's a guitar."
Ken's hands dropped to his sides. He stared blankly. "Oh."
Now enraged, the Brawler spoke up once more. "WHAT DA FLYIN' F(BEEP!) DO YA WANT?!" Okay, he yelled up, I should've said.
"Nothing," Ken stated. "Nothing at all. I just came to say, 'Thanks.' So . . . thanks. Thanks to you Brawler, tonight, George and I will be having ourselves a good ol' time."
"What do ya mean?"
"Oh, these greenbacks right here. They're not to place a bet on. Actually, it's money that was already placed on a bet earlier. The match may seem a little familiar to you. It was the, um . . . the um . . . oh, yes, the JCON versus Kaze match. Well, since I am John F. Kennedy Kaze III to the second power, twice removed . . . I guess that means this money is from my match. Remember some fella with spiky blond hair, blue eyes, sideburns to his earlobes. Yeah, that guy. Geo Vacton." Kaze's smirk had resurfaced now as he began to stroke his beard. "Well, that wasn't exactly his money he used to place the bet on, if ya know what crack pipe I’m smokin'. " His grin grew to each of cheekbones.
Immediately, with all of the pieces to the puzzle falling into place, BAB slammed his fists down on top of his desk causing papers and money to fly everywhere.
"You sonuva . . . who da f(BEEP!) do ya think you're messin' wit, son? I'll ann....annihi....-pissed because he can't pronounce the word- KILL YOU!!!" The Brawler quickly leaped toward Kaze. Mittens wasn't far behind. The Ninja Brigade had made it their mission to beat this moron, who happened to get the best of them tonight, to a bloody pulp. However, due to Ken's agility, he was able to spring backwards out of the door and run down the hallway to safety.
Waiting for him around the corner was a smiling Love!Love! KAMIKAZE!!! with an arm around the lovely stagehand he met last week, Polly. Kaze caught his breath as LLK looked at him.
“You take care of that business? If so, ready to hit the town?”
Kaze smiled, flashing the fan of Benjamins in his hand as he replied with a simple nod before placing the money in his pocket.
“Tonight, the food, drinks, and fun are all on the Ninja Brigade.”
The Ninja Brigade will not be getting their vengeance for this scam the Kazernator Extremeth pulled on them tonight. No, they must do it another time it seemed. The scene closed as the Ninja Brigade disappeared from the RaveTron, the Back Alley Brawler looking like he could spit nails and cough up chainsaw blades. In the meanwhile, the night was young for the trio of Kaze, Polly, and LLK . . .
With the Brigade’s money.
Ain’t that a bitch.
