Squall's Journal.
Sweet Darkness, Hold Me...
...By the Gods, I haven't updated in forver. Sorry... I haven't done much.
Went to Tawas on Saturday, slept all day (...literally.) Sunday and half way through
Monday. I have a new fanfic obbsession: Seifer X Squall From FF8... It's Yaoi (boy X boy
love) and if you have a problem... oh well, I really don't care. Anyways... Today I might go
for a bike-ride with Kry. Maybe not. I don't care. Gods, I haven't slept much as of late...
Bye.
(...leave me alone...please..?),
Kel.
...Alright. I'm doing pretty pathetic at being me... But, It works well enough,
I guess. I'm going to Ludington (A nice beach-town in Michigan) for two weeks starting the
27th. ...There's not much to say. I have company, but she's still
sleeping. I am going to a demolition derby, not this weekend, but the next... Fun,
I'm sure. ...Well, for lack of anything more earth-shaking, I'm going to leave. Bye.
(...oh, and for a note, 102 hits minus 5 for me...)
(...),
Kel.
...I can't talk long, I have company (...yes, it amazes even me...) But, it
wouldn't be a long entry anyway, I haven't done much. A bit of a lack of sleep and a full
24-pack of Vanilla Coke, with half of a 12-pack of Coke does wonders for your morbid
humor... But, It's slowly wearing off, as I slip back towards me. Damn. And I only have 5
soda's left...
(...This was a sadly lacking entry...),
Kel.
...Everything concerning me has calmed down... People are begining to
accept it (though Chris is still trying to dissect my brain...) I just cleaned my room. My
mom added a chair while I was gone, so now it looks like a dorm room... (...oh well, no
big deal...) In any manner, it's clean now. And I moved Day One through Day Ten to a
different place... It's Here. There's not much going on today...
I've been me all day...
(...Might that be because you were alone most of the day..?)
(...No. I had company more than half the day.)
But, I added a button at the bottom for my old entries...I guess I'll go. Bye
everyone (...everyone...)
(...Why does this have to be so complicated..?),
Kel.
...I guess it works now. Dammit! I tried to be myself around my family, to
see if I could...and no! I revert back to that false smile and fake giggle... *sighs angrily* I
hate myself for it! I know I can do it... If they'd just quit asking me what's
wrong! ...I guess I angered Chris enough... He stopped trying to dissect me(...which is
good, in my mind...).
(...Why can't I be me..? Why can't I quit palying these games with
everyone..?),
Kel.
Evening: 8:59 PM
I messed up on my HTML script. Or on my computer. But it doesn't
matter... I broke the news to my mom (...about my personality change.)and she took it
well, and even offered be the help that I need not explain to everyone, all I have to do is
be me. And if they ask what's wrong, say 'nothing' and keep going... I thought about it and
it seems I will do fine... I am going to get another sword(if I get straight A's...). Which
should be no problem... See you all later...
I'm still not sure why Zea can't adjust. But oh well... If she can't figure it
out...(...It's her problem...) I just got back to my mom's house... I have to try and fix the
computer...(...It's all I'm good for apparently.) I'll keep you updated...
(...I'm so tired of this...Why can't I be me..?),
Kel.
