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STANDARD DISCLAIMER:
I do not expect to be held responsible for my words in here. This is a journal, so if you wish to confront me on anything said in here, give up. I'll sic my Yami on you. u.u; I do wish some amount of privacy, even if it's web-journal. I'll talk about innermost things here, things I won't and would NEVER say in real life. I refuse to be held responsible for anything as a result of my journal. Oh, and I'm bi and dating Kaiya-chan. GET OVER IT.
End Entry | 11:04 School(ness).
HA! All I need to do is instead of skipping my lunch to work in the cafeteria, I can skip my lunch to work in the library and between working, I can update and check stuff. Yay for me!
End | 6:47 ack!
~.~ Worse thing about school today I think is that I won't be able to get online during 3rd. Iiiiiiiiiiiicky. I'll write about school when I get home!
Begin | 23:09 End | 23:12 Yawn.
I'm tired. I've been studying for exams. I don't care if I haven't updated in a fucking millenium.
Begin | 10:24 End | 10:31 We are the people you hate.. We are / the fucking / bastards you created...
Man, I'm depressed. Mom says I can't go see Kaiya this weekend. That's a bitch. I had a longer update, but Matt disconnected me from the server and it deleted. So yeah. The only other thing I really said is that I'm within the process of putting my mom through a huge guilt trip. She told me this morning, and I stared at her, then started crying and told her to go so I could finish getting ready for school. X3;; She started crying and told me she was sorry. I really do believe she won't let me go because she's afraid of me "fallnig in love" with her-- she currently thinks I'm insane and have no idea what I'm talking about. I'm probably going to be depressed all week and when she asks, I'll -- in a very calm, truthful manner-- inform her its because she fucked my week up.
Yes vengeful much.
Begin | 10:35 End | 10:44 DEATH TO THEE!!
Worg....... I want to go home and sleeeeeeeeeep..... @.@ I'm not really that tired, but it's monday and I'm bored out of my skull. I'm trying to decide what to write my Geography of Michigan Final Examination paper on. I feel like I'm supposed to be picking what manner I wish to die in-- "Would you like to be beheaded, squashed below the weight of a hundred thousand bricks, or beaten into the very carpet you stand upon with a ladel?!" "Well, I don't know. I'm thinking being smote by devouration via alligator sounds pretty tempting..."
Begin | 16:18 End | 16:49 I'm bouncin' off the walls again! Whoa-Oh! I'm lookin' like a fool again! Whoa-Oh! I threw away my reputation.. One more song for the radio station!
XD Whoaaaaaaaa...... I definently shouldn't read Orli/Vig fanfiction at early morning hours. I'm so bloody hyper, can't walk in a straight line and giggling like a bloody schoolgirl. ... Wait. I -am- a schoolgirl. XD Hot damn, I'm awesome.
Begin | 10:39 End | 10:42 She's my kind of rain... Like love from a drunken sky... Confetti fallin' down all night... She's my kind of rain. Well, not much to really say, I just wanted to updated. I've been really huggly. My sister says next weekend she'll take me to see Jami. I really can't wait to hug her. And I just want her, and the whole world to know how much I love her, and that I'm always impressed and astounded by her personality, stunned by her passion, amazed by her beauty-- within and without.
Begin | 11:02 End | 11:23 "Look you pansy ass little boy, do you -want- me to kick your ass?"
Uh huh. Riiiight. I'm at the library, I slept in this morning, and I've got one of the largest masses of idiots next to me.
Begin | 5:15 End | 5:43 I.. HATE... EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU WHY.. DO I LOVE YOU? You.. hate... everything about me.. WHY.. do you love me?
O.o I haven't updated in a week? Weird. Well, here it is now. ^^ I finally got around to it, and it's o.O early in the morning, before I go back on the first day. And due to the snow and slick roads, I'm playing avid attention to the channel 5 news in hopes that it'll be delaed. n.n;; Hm, what, lethargic? >.>;
o.o And ironically enough, I think that's about it. I'm not too worried and I don't keep goals well. *glance at T.V.* A~and I really don't think I'll be getting that delay I wanted. Oh well. I know I wanted mainly to work on my story, Salvation, but it's no biggie. I suppose you could count that as a new year resolution, but it doesn't really matter to me that much. I mean, I'm determined to work on my stories, and force myself to complete the damn things, but... I don't know, it feels almost cheapened by placing it on a "to-do" list, ya know? So I just won't do that. A~and let's see. To cover what's been going on in the real world... Well, not much, I think. I got a fishie!! ^^ I named him Varawoo, after the Demon fish in Dragon Knights! n.n The fish who sank the world. Demiance: He's a goldfish. AYE and a vicious one at that..! *watches him flit around backwards and in circles, seemingly still confused by his mirrored image* ... Uh... In... Portugal, that's considered a terrifying characteristic you know..! Dart: *sweat...drop..* n.n; RIGHT! Anyways, I believe I've *coughMUSEScough* have rambled enough this update. So ya, I've got to go to school in an hour and twenty minutes, unless I get the delay I want. Icky icky.
Begin | 14:37 End | 14:44 Left on an east-bound train, Gone.. first thing this morning. Why's what's best for you... Always the worst thing for me?!
Hee. I felt bad that you people weren't getting a real update, soo... Ya. Here's your update! But honestly. When I said there wasn't much to say, there realy isn't. I got lots of stuff for christmas, which I'm too lazy to say. And yea, I know it's about Jesus. n.n I'm just slightly defective. I'm refundable!!
Begin | 16:37 End | 16:40 This looks like a job for me, So everybody.. Just follow me! 'Coz we need a little.. Controversy, Because it feels so empty without me!
Well, I don't really have anything to say, it's just the sort of Let you know I live update, lol. So yea... Lots of family socialness, many presents, I've got a car, and yeah. ^_^ that's about it.
Begin | 0:00 End | 0:24 You've always been a friend of mine And that's the way it'll be Till the day I die Yeah, it's good to know you're on my side And now you know she's leavin' me And I need you're help to make her see So turn on your charm and let it shine 'Cause you've always been the one who could make her stay around So when she gets to the city limit signs, don't let me down!
Er. I was going to update. But. Yeah. Got distracted. ^_^ I love kaiya!
Begin | 13:12 End | 13:38 The Smile On Your Face Lets Me Know That You Need Me There's A Truth In Your Eyes Saying You'll Never Leave Me A Touch Of Your Hand Says You'll Catch Me Whenever I Fall Yeah, You Say It Best When You Say Nothing At All..
^_^ *feels all mushy and cuddly now* Kaiya-chan is so getting pounce when she gets online. n.n I hope she's heard this song, because she'd love it's cute mushiness. ^^ It's just so damn cute, I love it. n.n Man, I love her so much.
Begin | 11:20 End | 11:33 Wai, husky puppies!
<.<; Curses. It seems another three days have melted by. ^_^ HOWEVER. I SO have a monitor now! YAY for me!!! n.n Seriously. That's just like.. the highlight of my day. I love it. I decorated it already. It's old and big, and CRT, but I love it, damnit! And Kaiya-chan just showed me a REALLY cute picture of a huskie However, I want to RP and I have to go christmas shopping soon and yeah. ^_^ *pet journal readers before bounding away*
Begin | 10:03 End | 10:05 "BLOODY" "FUCK" "DAMN"
Here. Currently twitching. *copies and pastes from Gaia* I'll explain more later, maybe. If I feel motivated.
Begin | 10:20 End | 10:23 Well, isn't that a bitch?
Okay, just a note-- Joe doesn't hate me. He told me so. N'yah.
Begin | 11:14 End | 11:15 X3 automatic.
Not a big update, but that Joe (Inu-chan) hates me.
Rath
Begin | 13:48 End | 14:02 As we go on, we remember all the times we had together And as our lives change, from whatever, We will still be friends forever.
^^ That song is Vitamin C's "Graduation (Friends Forever)." I like, seriously heart that song. Coz it's so going to be the class of 2005, hey? ^^ But I don't want to think about it, coz I jus' don't. n.n I'mma go get a Christmas Tree soon, but not just yet. X3 Dad gave me two new shirts-- "You have the right to remain silent-- SO SHUT THE F**K UP!" and "That's Mr. Asshole to you." XD YES! And my ma's going to be all "o_o RICHARD! x_x I can't believe you gave your daughter those!" X3 And I shall rule the world. X3 Lates.
Begin | 11:13 End | 11:20 I can still feel you just as close as skin every now and then, All by myself in a crowded room on my empty bed.. There's a place you've touched with your love, no one gets close to.. I can still feel you...
Hurray! I'm finally feeling better! God, how I missed that! I'm used to being a generally healthy person, so when I'm sick, I get really sick. ^_^ And I was moderately depressed yesterday, but that seems to have worn off. ^^ Cool.
Begin | 20:48 End | 21:02 Dancing All Alone, singing dum-di-doe Listening to the music from the radio.
@.@ So many people talkin'... x.x Well, they're all worried because I'm kind of sick. but that's alright. I jsut need to sleep some more. I've got a really bad headache and the only reason I'm up right now is because I want to try and sleep a bit more. ^^ *yawns* I've went through six -- soon to be eight-- Tylenol PMs, so yeah. Yawn. I'll update later though, coz I'm tired just now.
Begin | 17:30 End | 22:42 Dancing All Alone, singing dum-di-doe Listening to the music from the radio, Dancing All Alone, singing dum-di-doe Pretending I'm together with my romeo.
Hmm... ^^ sorry, it's been a long while since I've updated *yawn* but I've been busy and there hasn't been much to say. ^_^ Thanks Kaiya-chan for giving me my own spot in your prayers. ^__^ *huggle* Love you!
Begin | 22:08 End | 22:42 I love you, always forever, Near or far, closer together, Everywhere, I will be with you, Everything, I will do for you.
^_^ Rath is deeply in love with someone. Has been, for a while now. Isn't THAT a plot twist? Marvelous, I love it. And it gets better. The person Rath loves? Loves Rath back. ^_^ GOD, I love that. And you know what, the person Rath loves is *gasp* another girl! For those of you that read my journal and know me in real life, you may be confused. ^^ fine by me. I LOVE A GIRL. Nice and plain. Oh, I'm not a lesbian though. I'm bi. n.n And you see, the reason I can admit this easily is that so long as she loves me, nothing else matters. If you guys hate me for being bi (I HIGHLY doubt you guys are that shallow though. Birch Run hasn't warped you THAT much, lol, GO BR! X3 ) that's cool... but I don't give a damn. ^^ simple as that, don't waste your breath taunting me, if you're a guy, I'll kick you in the nuts so hard you'll be sterile, and if you're a girl, well. I'll still beat you down. Coz I'm cool like that. Bu~ut, as for saying who it is, I won't. Because I don't know if she wants me to. ^_^ But my close friends know who it is, and they still love me. n.n Coz they kick ass. You know who you are.
Begin | 07:00 End | 07:08 Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming, Cannot sleep for the fear of silent nights. Oh, how I long for the deep sweet dreaming, The goddess of imaginary light.
This background wasn't going to be put up until December, but I need a change of look, so I think it can go up early.
Begin | 15:00 End | 15:10 *sigh*
Eveeryone, I'm very, very depressed today. I've been crying a lot, and when I can't cry anymore, I think. And then I cry again. Yes, I understand crying doesn't help anything. But what more do you want? Class 2005 lost another student yesterday-- His name was Josh Agius. He was one of the Class of 2005, and I've known him since kidnegarden. I'll be the first to admit, we hardly talked in high school. Maybe five or six times out of two years, but I don't care. He was--IS one of us. We've already lost Kristina Toth, last year. Just 11 months. To the DAY. She died December 16th, 2002. And now Josh just died... It's not fucking fair! They can choose another class to badger, right? I don't even know why I'm crying. I knew him well up to 6th grade, had a crush on him even, but I was in seventh at Chesaning, and then I came back and we picked on each other a little and on the halls, but I doubt our names ever even reached each other's conversations. But in high school, the last thing I did was give him a cookie. It wasn't anything big, or special, I just had some cookies with me that day and he like tackled me and was all "I want a cookie" and I told him "No, you're not special enough for a cookie." He blinked at me and said "Well.. I want a cookie anyways." So I gave him one. Then he tried to mob me and steal the thing of cookies (he didn't though, I think I may have smacked him with the bag and broke the cookies, thus effectively ending his want for them) and yeah. It's no big deal, but the last thing was giving him a cookie and telling him no? That's ridiculous. I'm going to go cry some more and try to at least mouth lyrics in a false attempt to calm myself.
P.s. The background for this journal is Mineko Ohkami's "Rath Illuser" and "Kai-stern of Blue" and I don't own ANY of them. Sadly.The Background however was made by me. Take it and be smote. |