I�m 19 and you don�t know. I can look you in the eye and tell you lies I�ve spun time and time again. So simple, yet so complex. They�re what I need to survive. Have I lied, but look at you. I can see the truth in your eyes even as you mask the disguise. Why won�t people listen to me? I know just as much as you. Why do people take me for a punked out drugie? I�ve never done anything you haven�t tried. Why do you frown at my success and smile at my failures? I�m starting out just as you had to�at the bottom. Listen to me as if I were the adult I�ve become, not the child I�ve had to leave behind. My ideas are just as good as yours if not better because I was once a child too, so were you. How easily an adult forgets what it�s like to be 14. I want to hide, I�m not ready to be thrown into the real world, but I know I can�t; to take on the world is the least of my worries. I may not be the best at everything I do, but if you�d just listen I�d get through to you. Just like you, believe it or not, I�m flesh and blood too. My opinion counts even though you�ll never listen. You ask us for advice, then nod and I can tell by the look on your face, you didn�t hear my words of wisdom. You told me children need to stop lying. We lie not only to protect ourselves, but to protect what lousy parents we really have. It�s a way of life; you should hear us when you�re not around. The fantasy family of all people talking to work out their problems and never a lie spoken, is just that; a fantasy. How can you expect there not to be a fight? You told me Jay was out of his right mind right now. Is he really or is he really just finding his right mind? The threats won�t stop us, neither will the phone calls. Why call my girlfriend when you�re looking for me? What would she know if I don�t get it? A lot may scare me, I�m not afraid to admit it, but more gets me mad. Threaten me? Who do you think I am? I�ve seen and done a lot in my 19 years. All I have to do is reach out and grasp it. What holds me back other than myself? Just because I ride a skateboard does not mean I�m a bad kid. I have a full time job and working on getting my own place to live. Being homeless sucks, you know and I�m sick of ending up that way. Have I burned some bridges? So have you, why is it okay for you to do it, but when I do the world�s gotta end? What makes you so special? I can tell just by looking that you don�t care. My words are the words of a youth, a child, no life experience� maybe not the same life experiences, but I�ve had my own. Growing up youngest in a broken family, forced to drop school at 16 after my mother left at 15. Forced to move constantly for 3 years because I couldn�t live at my �home� any longer. My brother�s about to get married. That was the last place I lived, but I had to move because he was holding me back. I�ve dome better since then. And my life counts for what in your eyes? Oh, that�s right, turn your back and walk away. Go ahead I don�t need to waste my time of deaf ears anyway. I don�t need you anyway. I can do this on my own. Some one will listen to me somewhere. If not here than there. But remember this:
So wake up and see the pain
Our eyes hold an unseen truth
You�ll never find what you�re looking for
To bring us down.