September 29, 2003

Hi, my life is finally going to get a tad quieter. My folks went home on Friday. I�ve spent the last three weeks with them M - F (pretty much) so I will be back to my old routine. I was able to go to my favorite Curves tonight for the first time in 3 weeks! So needless to say, it was great to be back. The funny thing is that everyone asked me if I hit goal tonight when I was working out but I have another 15 � 20 pounds until I hit goal weight. As for the Target Points, I have not been able to keep within a 22 point range. I just cannot do it�okay, I just don�t do it. I was always happy with 25 points so I�ve been hitting that a lot lately. I�m still the same this week. I haven�t lost anything but I wasn�t exercising during the past 3 weeks so I wouldn�t have expected a loss. I have to say, I have fire in my belly now to lose the rest of the pounds. My goal is to hit goal before next May. I know that is way off but I would like to be done before then. The funny thing is that I feel great now, but I would like to get down to at least 145 on my scale. That�s possible!

I had a great time at the high school reunion. It was a blast. I got to speak to some old friends and just observe the hell out of everyone else. I have to admit that I didn�t recognize a bunch of people. It seems as if the age stick hit my class hard. Funny thing is that the women looked good but the men aged poorly. I saw my ex-boyfriend and he looked the same but different. He�s wife is exactly what I pictured�a nice conservative woman�I bet she�s a major republican (he was a republican poster boy at the ripe age of 12). My ex-best friend Tracey Ladensack was there. Let�s just say, she still looks like a whore but this time, I think she had a boob job. She came up to me when another friend was with me and said �hi� and I said �hi� back but I looked for an escape because Chris went to the bathroom so when he came back, he saved me. Then later on, she asked me if I would hate her forever. I said �Yeah, probably�. She told me that I needed to let go of the hate because we were such good friends. I told her �We were friends for six years and I haven�t spoken to you in ten so I don�t think I�ve been missing anything�. I know I should have been more adult about that but folks, I didn�t want to save face, I don�t like her so I�m not going to pretend that everything is okay�and what she did to me as a friend was okay, because it wasn�t. She was a crappy friend and when she could have made my life easier, she didn�t. So, I have no interest in her as a person. Moving on from that�Chris and I stayed the night at the St. Clair Inn. It was just beautiful and we had a huge room. I had such a nice time with him.

Speaking about Chris, we�re still doing well. This weekend we are going down to Kentucky to the Mammoth Cave to take a cave tour. The tour is going to be 5.5 miles in 6 hours. Hopefully, the trip won�t kill me physically because I haven�t been training for it. I can�t do anything about that now. I can just hope for the best. We are going to stay with Teresa and Chris. They are still together. I have no idea why but they are. I guess they are doing better now but I wish she had more of her heart in this relationship because I swear she doesn�t love him like a woman should. But, I would be a hypocrite if I judged her for that because I stayed with Shawn for seven years and I didn�t care for him. I don�t kick myself for wasting time but I feel sad that I just waited so long to end the relationship. I�ll never do that again.

Work is going fine. Mike was going out for a full time position but I fear that he�s not going to be able to get it because he was competing with another coworker who has been there for 15 years. The sad thing is that he is a better therapist than her but I think she�s going to try to pull rank over him. I�m still hanging out with him at work but as for personal time, I feel guilty when I�m hanging with him because you know what, I wouldn�t want Chris to be hanging out with some chick but that�s just me. I know that will pass soon but I still feel ackward, you know. Well, I hope you all are doing well, and keeping warm! They say it is supposed to snow here on Wednesday and Thursday�how crazy is that? Take care, Kellie

September 19, 2003

Hi folks, this is the first time in a week that I have been home. The folks are leaving next week for Kentucky so I�m trying to spend as much time with them as possible. I�m continuing to maintain my weight, which is good but I�m still getting anxious for my life to settle down a bit�but that�s not going to happen anytime soon.

My 10-year high school reunion is tomorrow. I�ve opted to wear a classic black dress. It looks great. Funny thing about going back is that the majority of the people who are there are just going to think that I gained 10 pounds. The people who saw me overweight are going to be shocked at my transformation. I have mixed feelings about going back. Half of me is just dying out of curiosity to go back, the other half is dreading it�you know, bring back all those insecure feelings from your youth. I�ve done plenty enough stuff to be proud of in my life so if someone wants to snub me they can kiss my ass. I�m taking Chris so I�m bound to have fun. I�m dragging him around Marine City tomorrow to show him where I grew up. I�ll take a bunch of pics and post them on here. Well, I better go pack. Take care all-Kellie

September 6, 2003

Hello old friends. I don�t even want to think about how swamped I�ve been in the past few weeks but I have been swamped. This is the first Saturday that I have had that I�ve just sat home and caught my breath. I�m oncall this weekend so I sent Chris to his friends in Kalamazoo because I didn�t want to tie him down this weekend plus I had to pick him out some birthday stuff. Strange thing is that his birthday is the day before mine. He�s turning 31 and I�m turning 28. Can you believe that? For all you old readers, you�ve been with me for four years! Strange thing that I was thinking in the Jeep tonight is that I�m at a comfortable stage in life. For instance, I have a great paying job where I can support MYSELF (no dependence on a man here), I have fulfilling relationships with others, and I finally feel comfortable in my skin. I�m proud to be me�my head is held high with pride. I really like who I am right now. Of course, I can always improve but I�m really enjoying this moment. It�s a good feeling�a real good feeling.

As for weight, I stayed the same for the past few weeks. I�m okay with that. I�ve been only able to hit CURVES twice a week for the past 3 weeks so I really can see the difference of not going 4 times a week. As for Weight Watchers, I�m going to try the new FLEX POINTS but to tell you the truth, I�m kind of scared to. I�ll be optimistic about the results. So why am I staying the same? I�m not eating less and I�m not exercising as much as I used to because of my recent schedule. I�m looking for things to calm down. Work continues to be busy and so does the personal life.

Things are going great with Chris. No complaints here. I really enjoy his company and who he is. I finally met his sister and brother in law this past weekend when we went to Detroit. To tell you the truth, I don�t know what to make of her yet, she�s very different from the rest of his family. I�m taking Monday off, which is Chris�s birthday, and we are going to celebrate his birthday at his folks. For his birthday, I bought him a pair of Khakis and a shirt from Eddie Bauer (onsale of course), a photo album, Timex watch, and a self-inflatable mat. Nothing too exciting but it�s useful. Then on Tuesday we are going up north to spend my birthday with my folks. I have to say, it�s pretty awesome to have a birthday that close to each other.

Argh, I�ve been shopping too much lately. Tonight I picked up a pair of Betula sandals from Sams, a pair of Puma retro tennis shoes, and a Puma top. Keep me away from the stuff. I swear since losing my stuff in the Jeep 1, I�ve been going spend crazy. I�ve got to stop. Everything is on sale but still�

My high school reunion is coming up. It�s my 10 year. I�m looking forward to it in a way but I�m also dreading it. Does that make any sense? It�s like I want to see some people but I�m really dreading to see other. I�m also not looking forward to seeing the cliques�you know those little petty popular idiots who never leave the town and have the same group of friends that they have since they were 6. Argh! I�ve picked out a different dress than the last one I took a picture in�it looks a lot better. Chris and I are going to stay at the St. Clair Inn that night. I figured it would be a good place to stay since the bed and breakfast in Marine City is full. I�ll see if he could use his fathers digital camera to take some pics. Well, that�s it for me tonight, take care all-Kellie

My Vistors Since September 6, 2003

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