Number 45
From a reader, after PO 44, Reflexions:
This was truly an f***ing good one. Got my morning off to a good start.
I've been compiling a list of irritating words that have become trendy, or at the very least, popular with writers, newscasters and the general public. I've only begun my compilation, but the few I have so far are:
Moi:
Reader again:
Re my list of pet peeves: "what it is is that...", as in, "What is the reason you decided to run for governor?" Response: "The reason is is that..." When and why did the extra "is" become a necessary part of a reply? Now that you've heard this, I bet you'll notice that literally everyone, when asked a question, responds in this manner, and it's infuriating (to me), as is "nucular" when the word, dammit, is NUCLEAR!
Moi:
Well, maybe not literally everyone. But Fred says this pronunciation is in Webster's 9th ~ and it is! Since lots of people have said "nucular," from presidents all the way up to physicists, it has become acceptable. But we know it's still barbaric.
And I believe I have said "the reason is, is that . . ." but I do have the comma in there, even when speaking. I know it's not elegant, though I believe it would be an appositive and not necessarily incorrect. When I say it, I'm usually trying to be humorous, and I'm always reminded of Andy Griffith's old comedy routine, "What it was, was football." The extra verb plus the emphasis on both verbs creates a kind of ruminative effect. I found a sound clip online of what must be an early version of Griffith's famous football bit but without that famous line. It's pretty amusing, still and even so.
But I do not say "the reason is because," which actually is wrong.
My foreign students often confuse adjectival verb forms and say things like "I am boring" and "The movie was bored." But a real American on the radio the other day said that something or other "has got my head scratching." He meant, of course, it had got him scratching his head, which I guess is what Americans do when they're puzzled (or puzzling) over something.
"Coast to Coast" is a late night, all night AM radio talk show about all sorts of weird stuff, like aliens, elves, ghosts, and so on. I tune in sometimes, and last week heard something even more unusual than usual, about a parakeet that not only could talk, but also could carry on real conversations, even about abstract topics. Ryan B. Reynolds' web site has lots of info on the late bird, named Victor, as well as sound files, transcripts, and interpretations of the bird's difficult syntax. I present a slightly abridged example here of one of Victor's talks, about his mate, Betty, whose poetry is also on the site. (Remember, a budgie is a budgerigar, another name for parakeet.)
Can't have it all. . .
But Victor, Victor just blue Victor.
Victor's a bird.
Victor's a no good, just lonely budgie.
Victor's a bad heap budgie, budgie.
Pretty good people food.
Are you too, going to sleep here, Vic boy?
Victor, Victor is a good budgie.
Betty bite me.
Victor's a free budgie.
Budgie please good.
Pretty loose budgie.
Victors a bird, he have to see that!
Betty still here, but I'm so nice.
That's why I stay out here all by myself.
Yeah, not called free.
That's all. I'm unstuck in a sock.
I'll just go to her.
I'll stop with the fry.
Bad thing.
If you're up after midnight, try to locate George Noory's (formerly Art Bell's) program on your AM dial, if you want a change from music. One big difference between Noory and other talk show hosts is that no matter how peculiar his guests or phone callers are (and Noory has a high goofiness threshold), he is unfailingly polite.
In Cincinnati people say "Please" with a sort of questioning inflection when they do not understand what you say, instead of "Pardon?" or "Excuse me?" or "I didn't understand you." Cincinnati was settled by Germans, and I thought there was probably a connection, so I looked it up. In German, "Wie bitte" (literally "how please") means "I beg your pardon." So this German expression evolved into a regionalism.
The other day I drove past a strip mall called "Shoppes of (town name)." There was nothing olde worlde about this new little strip mall with its grocery store and Chinese carryout and Blockbuster and athletic shoe store. The sign made me want to shoot out the extra p and the e, if I had a gun and I could aim properly, but I guess I'm just being extra irritating lately. Sometimes it (and I) be that way (subjunctive mood: a mood of a verb used in some languages for contingent or hypothetical action, action viewed subjectively, or grammatically subordinate statements).
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