PARVUM OPUS

Number 44

REFLEXIONS

Warning: If you are very sensitive to the idea of coarse language, skip down to "Uncertain Terms.". No such language actually appears here. If you can't think of any bad words that start with "f" and if you are not offended by asterisks, you'll be OK.

On the radio today I heard a program on English usage in which the woman speaking mentioned the misuse of "myself" and other reflexives, when they are not used to refer back to the subject. (I discussed this briefly in PO 42.) A couple of familiar usages occurred to me that might help imprint the rule in memory better than my previous lame examples.

Note the difference between "Go f*** yourself" and "F*** you."

• The former uses the reflexive "yourself" because the implied or understood subject of the sentence is "you," that is, you are being requested or commanded to perform an action on yourself. The verb "go," of course, isn't necessary; the idea could be expressed simply as "F*** yourself." The interrogatory "Why don't you go f*** yourself?" is also a possible extrapolation.
• In the latter example, the implied subject is "I," meaning that the speaker is taking on the responsibility of mentally assaulting the listener, although perhaps it might be more properly expressed in the subjunctive or conditional mood, rather than the imperative.
• "F*** me" used as an exclamation of chagrin or exasperation does not imply the subject "I." In this, as in "f*** you," some external agent, or perhaps the universe, is the subject (or perpetrator), thus we do not hear "F*** myself."

I only heard the tail end of the radio program, and the reception wasn't clear, but you can see what an inspiration it was. I think we need a cable TV station devoted to English. If I knew who to ask (or whom), I would. Of course, someone could always get a spot on local cable and produce, let's say, a half-hour show to be aired once a week at 4:00 a.m. It would be a start.

UNCERTAIN TERMS

Heard on TV: Someone "wrote a revealing piece in [or on] another aspect in terms of femininity." Aspects of just about everything could be improved by eliminating the phrase "in terms of." And chances are "another aspect" carried no meaning in this sentence. I didn't hear the lead-in, but still, that sentence couldn't have been justified.

HIGH WATER NOONAN

Speechwriter Peggy Noonan said on TV, about a politician or political situation (does it matter which person or situation?): "A lot of water has gone across the bridge since then." Maybe she said it intentionally. Maybe she was thinking of flooding.

WAXED WHITMAN

Did you know Walt Whitman was recorded on a wax cylinder reading his own poetry ~ 36 seconds, four lines from "America"? I discovered it on my last week's auto travel CDs, "A Century of Recorded Poetry." Whitman died in 1892. The sound was very scratchy. I don't know anything about the technology, but it seems to me that a good sound engineer could remove much of the scratchiness in a digital recording. Still ~ amazing. You can hear it at http://jefferson.village.virginia.edu/whitman/audio/.

DINETTE SET

I'm a fan of the newspaper cartoon "The Dinette Set." In today's panel, a woman in a store complained about the "puny, gross selection of Halloween candy." "Gross" here means nasty, not large, of course, but gross also means large so I naturally thought of some classic oxymorons, such as "jumbo shrimp."

Copyright Rhonda Keith 2003. Parvum Opus or part of it may be reproduced only with permission, but it is permissible to forward the entire newsletter as long as the copyright remains.

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