Recap: Last chapter the Erase card made it’s second debut, rudely interrupting the last few days Syaoran has in Japan. Chindra disappeared, by the power of the Erase, and Sakura is really upset. Touya was AWFUL and interupted Sakura and Syaoran in their little moment, let’s see here....Well I guess this starts around there. It’s like Monday before the Wednesday Syaoran is leaving.

Chapter 26

Sakura walked miserably to school on Monday morning. She had slept deeply the night before, but it was only a short escape from the horrible reality. Sakura woke up and found her house the same destructured version she had fallen asleep from, and Chindra was no where to be found. Touya had already left early for school, and Sakura figured her father was on a working trip, so she had woken alone. Kero had been sleeping in his drawer peacefully, and Sakura felt bitterness, almost hatred, to the little yellow bear. She was tempted temporarily to poke him with a pencil, just because, but she had contained the urge.

Sakura knew her eyes probably still looked a little red; she had cried for a while that morning after seeing the necklace hanging on her neck that Chindra had given her. Still, Sakura forced herself to continue her way to school despite her low feelings. This was, after all, one of the last few days she’d get to see Syaoran, and she didn’t want to miss an entire school day. Did I mean what I said to Touya? Could I tell Syaoran what I said? Did he even hear me? I don’t know, he didn’t seem to act like he did. This is horrible, embaressing, but I can’t come right out and ask him. I should, there’s no need for me to worry like this, if I just come right out and say it...I mean, he’s leaving soon anyway, it can’t hurt...If I end up embaressing myself, I won’t have to worry, because within two days my embaressment will be gone.

Sakura could see Madison walking down the sidewalk a few feet away. Sakura hadn’t talked to Madison since Friday when she had so abruptly left her house when they had been watching the video, but if Sakura ever needed her friend’s consolment and advice, now was the time. Madison smiled as she walked forward and met up with Sakura as they turned towards the school. "What is wrong, Sakura?"

Sakura glanced over at Madison, her eyes threatening to tear up. How will I ever make it through the entire school day? "Madison, the Erase card...it came around this weekend."

"Did you seal it again?" Madison asked.

"Yes, at least, I think so, I can hardly remember everything that happened...It erased Chindra. And, and it erased parts of my house..."

"But when you sealed it, everything came back, right?"

"N-no. Chindra’s gone. She’s...she’s gone until I find out how to completly fix my cards, but I don’t know, if she’ll even come back then, it will be so far in the future...I just can’t stand it!" Sakura said, tears finally finding their way to her eyes, Sakura blinking them back.

"That’s horrible Sakura! Did Kero tell you spells that could help?"

"Kero bailed. I don’t know where he went. Just before anything happened, he was gone, he said he had to go..." Sakura said, frustrated. They walked through the gates onto the blacktop parking lot in front of the school.

"That’s odd, for Kero, isn’t it?"

"He’s been odd for a while now..." Sakura said, sighing, her tears finally residing away for then. "And...and Syaoran’s leaving Wednesday. It’s so soon, and with all this happening..."

Madison smiled sympathetically at Sakura. "Don’t worry, Sakura, everything always works out, you will get stronger and fix everything."

Sakura couldn’t really appreciate Madison’s advice, the greif seemed to near still to be looking toward the future. "I guess..." She said glumly, stepping through the doors into the hallway.

Sakura looked to Syaoran’s locker for him, but he wasn’t there yet. She walked over to her locker that was next to Madison’s and set her bookbag down, spinning in her combination, accidentally putting part of Syaoran’s combination in first, part of the after affect of the Change card’s little demonstration of power. She opened it and grabbed her books, noticing as she shoved her bookbag in that Syaoran was walking down the hall, usual scowl and disconnection from the rest of the world, headphones on his ears as he was listening to his portable CD player. Sakura hurried to finish shoving her bookbag in then rushed away from Madison over to Syaoran.

He glanced up as he pulled his headphones off then looked back to his locker, spinning the lock. "How are you doing?" He asked politely.

"I’m alright, for now, anyway. Did you happen to look for any reverse spells this morning?" She asked hopefully.

Syaoran sleepily pulled his locker open, quickly bombarded with some books that had fallen from their precarious positions, and Syaoran made a desperate attempt to catch them, catching two, ripping a bind on another, and getting a paper cut across his finger from the last one. Sakura shook her head and picked up the books he hadn’t managed to catch off the floor and handed them to him. "You should really clean that out. Though I suppose you’ll have to, when you leave..." Sakura said, a hint of bitterness on her voice.

"I looked through a few books," Syaoran said, ignoring her last comment, "But I didn’t find anything. I didn’t look through that many though," He added quickly with the fallen look on Sakura’s face, "and I’m sure there’s still some hope for a spell like that." Syaoran said, lying through his teeth. He hadn’t slept one wink the previous night, going straight from Sakura’s house to the boxes of already packed books of spells. He had pulled out as many he could read in the long hours of the night, unpacking all that Sakura and Chindra had done the day before.

"Oh." Sakura said, her face falling.

Syaoran got the books to balance in his locker and quickly shut his locker while they were all in there, then straightened up. "Don’t worry, I’m sure we’ll figure out something." He started walking towards their homeroom, noticing breifly that they were being watched by Madison.

"But we don’t have any time! What time are you leaving Wednesday?" Sakura asked.

Syaoran pulled the door open to their first class, letting Sakura in before him. "Early morning." Syaoran mumbled.

Sakura looked at him with sad eyes. "You lied to me." She said.

Syaoran glanced at her, confused. "What?"

Sakura set her books down on her desk then sat down, turning and facing Syaoran’s desk. "You told me last Wednesday night (Sakura gets blush thinking of those events) that you were leaving in a week or so. That was nighttime."

Syaoran tried to keep himself from doing his natural reaction of rolling his eyes, trying to be more understanding. "I’m sorry, but I can’t...my flight is set, I can’t change it, or I would."

Sakura looked down with sad eyes, knowing he was sincere. "I didn’t mean," She looked up, attempting a smile. "I was just kidding."

Syaoran knew Sakura was trying to recover from her sad mood, so he did his best not to be offended. "Has your father seen your house yet?"

Sakura didn’t want to talk about her family, but she knew she had no reason to hold back. "I don’t think he’s been home from work yet, he had a trip with the university, so just...just Touya and I have been home since last night." Sakura said, biting her tongue at Syaoran’s dark glower as Touya’s name was mentioned. "What...what should I do around Touya and Madison while...you’re gone?"

Syaoran could hardly stand hearing Sakura’s voice mention her older brother, and an irrestible urge to punch something occured every time the two syllable name would come out of her lips, but he was managing to contain himself so far. "Just-"

Tamakazi planted himself next to Syaoran, smiling brightly. "What is so gravely serious that you two are talking so intently about?"

Sakura looked up weakly, a bit annoyed with Tamakazi for interrupting them. "Nothing, really."

Chihura sat down next to Tamakazi. "You two have been talking an awful lot." She commented, grinning. "Is something going on?"

"Li-kun is going back to Hong Kong." Sakura said, trying not to blush from the general embaressment she felt.

"We knew that. When are you going?" Tamakazi asked.

"I’m uh, I’m leaving this Wednesday." Syaoran mumbled.

"Wow, really? That’s soon, I didn’t think you’d be leaving so suddenly!" Chihura said.

"Yeah, well..." Syaoran said.

"How long do you think you’re going to be gone?" Tamakazi asked.

"Um...just like a month or two, I’m sure..." Syaoran said carefully, knowing Sakura was listening deeply to him. He wouldn’t have been afraid at all to tell Tamakazi some smart off reply like ‘a few years’, but he refrained from doing that.

"That’s a releif, the soccer team will be struggling to maintain life without our best forward." Tamakazi said.

Syaoran tried to smile. "Yeah."

"I’m sure the soccer team will manage." Madison said, sitting down next to Sakura.

Syaoran glared away at the floor, annoyed with being the center of attention, and annoyed that Madison was joining the conversation. "You guys all sound so pessimistic! What about the spring dance coming up?" Chihura asked brightly.

Sakura looked at the floor, having completly forgotten about that event. Tamakazi looked brightly up. "Maybe I can bring Chindra!" Tamakazi said brightly. Sakura looked even harder at the floor, not aware that Syaoran was looking sadly at her, understanding what she was feeling.

"Please..." Chihura said, rolling her eyes.

________________________________________________________________________

Sakura unconsciously fingered the necklace around her neck as she waited impatiently for gym to end. She was going to ask Syaoran if he needed any help finishing up packing, then maybe, just maybe, she’d be able to say some of the things she wanted to before he left. Come on sensei, let us go. This is so boring, I don’t care about the rules for throwing discus. I was never into track, I just want to go home...

Sakura yawned impatiently, then jumped to her feet when the sensei told them they could get dressed again. Sakura jogged out of the gym and into the locker room, sitting down on the bench next to her gym locker. Madison walked in a while after, a smile on her face. "You are eager to get home? Do you need to get home to explain to your father what happened?"

Sakura hurriedly changed into her school uniform. "Yeah, I’ve gotta get home." Sakura said, mumbling Syaoran style.

"You should really lessen Kero’s food rations this time." Madison said jokingly.

"Yeah." Sakura said, smiling absently as she collected her shed gym uniform.

Madison sighed sympathetically. "Don’t get all bent out of shape because Syaoran is leaving. You did just fine without his help before, I’m sure you’ll be able to manage again. You sealed all the cards and became a wonderful magic girl, remember?"

Sakura looked up with annoyance at her friend, but didn’t have the strength to be angry, so she just went along with it. "I guess."

The bell rang, and Sakura and Madison walked out of the locker room together. Sakura wanted to go talk to Syaoran, but she couldn’t with Madison watching, she could only watch the back of his head walk through the school crowd. I am starting to understand Syaoran’s thoughts about Madison. She just seems to be in the way. Sakura went to her locker with the plan of rushing away before Madison could protest. Sakura quickly shoved her books into her bookbag and hurried away to Syaoran’s locker, biting the inside of her lip as she knew Madison had noticed her.

Sakura reached Syaoran’s locker where he was already walking a few feet away, jogging to catch up. "Syaoran, wait up!" She called, reaching his side.

Syaoran glanced over at her as he walked. "What is it?"

"Do you need help packing tonight?" Sakura asked, her voice a whole lot happier and light than it had been that morning.

Syaoran studied her carefully out of the corner of his eye. "You should probably go home and try explaining things to your family, shouldn’t you?" He said with the greatest amount of caution he could put in, not wanting to hurt her feelings.

Sakura’s face fell, her good mood dropping through the floor. "I don’t think they’d care..." She started mumbling.

"If I know your family, they’d probaby be worried about you after you have been gone so much from home, and I don’t think Touya would appreciate you coming to my apartment..." Syaoran started, then drifted out. "Maybe tommorrow night? I still have alot of stuff to do, but I think I can manage for tonight."

Sakura managed a smile. "Yeah, sure. Tommorrow." The night before you leave. Yeah, okay. Whatever. Sakura started walking away from him. "Well I’m going to Madison’s then." Sakura said with a note of depression in her voice, hoping Syaoran noticed it. She walked down the hall the other way to find her friend, then after not finding her right away, Sakura decided to go home and mope.

____________________________________________________________________

"How is school going Touya?" Sakura’s father went on as they sat around the dinner table.

"Alright. We are getting ready for the spring festival we put on." Touya said.

Sakura leaned on her hand bored, shoveling food in her mouth only by habit. "I don’t see why you don’t stay at the college dorm." Sakura grumbled, being in a particularly bad mood with her brother.

"I don’t see how vandals managed to steal an entire wall of our house..." Touya spat back.

"What, you think I just decided to wipe out an entire wall of our house just for fun-"

"You two, all you do is fight now days. Maybe I should be spending more time at home, I thought that as you grew up I’d be able to go on more of these trips, but I see that’s not the case..."

"Otto-san what do I tell my friends in school when they see we have policemen inspecting at our house?" Sakura asked.

"The little brat didn’t seem too disrupted by all the things going on, maybe we should have the policemen give him an interrogation-"

"ONNI-CHAN! You-"

"Honestly, you two..." Her father started.

"You see it, don’t you, being with that little brat is putting a bad influence on our Sakura-chan, she’s become so contentious-"

"Touya-san, perhaps you are being a bit unsympathetic to your sister’s sore spots-" Her father tried to make peace.

"What do you mean ‘sore spots’?" Sakura asked hotly.

"Touya told me your friend is leaving in a few days to go back home, -"

"Onni-chan!"

Touya looked incredously at her. "What? It’s not like it’s personal information. We were just discussing when to hold the celebration. This Friday perhaps..."

Sakura slammed her fists on the table, something she never would have dared to do normally, but these conditions were different. "Why do you have to hate him so much-"

"Stop it!" Sakura’s father ordered. When a grudging silence was over the table, he sighed and continued eating. "I thought a night off to eat with the family would be some relaxation from work..."

"I’m sorry, it’s just...Touya’s been mean lately." Sakura said, sticking her tongue out at her older brother when her father wasn’t looking.

"Yes, perhaps some maturity would better suit my oldest son..." Her father said, casting an amused look at Touya.

Touya shrugged and looked back to his food. "My food is already cold. We have to hurry and get a new microwave." He said, adding another suspicious look at Sakura. "I still don’t quite understand how you missed the little fact that the stove and fridge were missing when you got home..."

"It was dark in the house!" Sakura said defensively.

"That didn’t seem to stop you and the brat from-" Sakura kicked Touya hard under the table, and Touya kept his mouth shut, luckily.

"I’m finished, otto-san, may I be excused?" She asked politely.

"Of course, Sakura-chan."

Sakura smiled and pushed her chair back, walking around the table, giving Touya a glare as she charged by him to the stairs. She hopped up those and walked into her room, finding Kero playing Space Destroyers, Bob still sitting and recovering from the battle he had fought. Kero turned from the television. "Food!" He said excitedly.

Sakura completly ignored him, not giving him any recognition that he had spoken, only walking silently over to her bookbag to get her math book so she could do her math homework in another room.

Kero watched her. "I know what this is about. But I’ll tell you, Sakura, I didn’t bail out, nothing like that-"

Sakura ignored him and walked to her door with her head held back high, then walked down the hall into Chindra’s room. Everything was still the same, Touya and her father were still under the impression she had some important business, and she was sure to turn up some time soon. Sakura shut the door quietly and turned on the light, looking around with teary eyes.

Sakura sat down on the edge of Chindra’s bed, looking at the picture pinned to a bulletin board that Chindra had taken from when they had gone to the concert, this picture of her, Madison, and Sakura, all sitting in the hotel, a picture they had gotten Yukito to take. She was so innocent, why did the Erase have to take her? Why not Touya? Sakura collapsed down on her bed, letting tears tumble down her cheeks for a few moments, then forcing them to stop, pulling her math book open and starting to write down equations.

These cards get more and more dangerous, stronger, bolder...and now I am loosing all of my help, I have to do this all myself. Sakura sighed, then noticed she had blurred some numbers together in her trailing thoughts, and started erasing them. But there’s nothing I can do. Nothing but keep resisting. Sakura finished up her homework and yawned. She pulled her book and notebook up and dragged her feet down the hall back to her room, walking into the dark television lit room.

Sakura tossed her book onto her bookbag, then walked over to her own bed. "Turn that off." She grouched at Kero, collapsing down.

"You know you should probably try getting a hold of Eriol. These cards are getting really strong." Kero commented, fluttering over to the power buttons on the nintendo.

Sakura sighed and rolled over so she could cry into her pillow if she had to. "And Syaoran’s leaving." She cried, her body shaking with the exhausting shakes of sobs she had been feeling a little too much lately.

"You never needed him, Sakura, he just made you think that you needed his help-"

"Then how do you explain the time he helped me transform the Light and the Dark cards? I never could have done that without him..." Sakura said, turning her head and talking to Kero for the first time directly.

"I am talking recently, Sakura. " Kero said. "He has no magic, you are lending it to him, that’s no way to fight oddly behaving cards. You need to use yourself, you..." Kero stopped talking, as his words were lost. Sakura had rolled over in attempt to ignore him, and was already trying vainly to sleep and block him out all at the same time.

______________________________________________________________________

Sakura had made a conscious effort to be as cheery as she could on Tuesday, despite the fact she felt like she was falling apart, her life was tumbling away underneath her, and she was powerless to stop it. "You think that I can really throw this twenty feet?" She asked Madison skeptically, holding the heavy discus in her hand.

"Of course. It’s all in how your throw your weight around when you switch your feet. Look, watch Rika."

Sakura looked over at Rika, who effortlessly sent the heavy weight sailing across the air. She sighed as she watched it slide across the gym floor. "Rika-chan joined track recently." Sakura added to Madison’s statement.

"OWWY!" Chihura whined, rubbing her shoulder.

Sakura looked over where Chiuhra had been throwing a shotput ball, a ninepound yellow ball. "What happened?" Sakura called over.

"I told her not to throw it like a softball." Tamakazi said, shrugging innocently.

"You told me it wouldn’t go very far, not that it would tear my shoulder out!" Chihura shouted, still clutching the back of her arm.

Sakura smiled and looked ahead. This can’t be that hard. She did the switching of feet the sensei had shown them earlier and released the discus, watching the heavy frisbee thing spin through the air a surprising distance. "Hey!" She said happily, turning and smiling at Madison.

Madison beamed. "No problem!" She said.

Sakura nodded. She looked over at the group of boys that were practicing long jump, seeing that Syaoran was up. He charged down the path to their fake sand pit with a good sprint and took off at the line of take off, pushing hard with his feet and flying through the air. Sakura and Chihura were both watching with awe, seeing him plant both feet solidly at the opposite edge of the pit. Syaoran stepped away clumsily, ignoring the people measuring the distance he had jumped.

"Record!" Eki-in yelled, looking up from the measuring tape he held. "Twenty one-four!" He shouted to the gym teacher.

Syaoran was ignoring all this very well, walking across the gym floor, and he walked past Sakura without glancing sideways. Sakura ignored the curious looks she got from Chihura and Tamakazi and ran after him. Sakura walked next to him, not quite sure where he was going, but wanting to talk to him anyway. "That’s awesome, twenty one feet! I only got twelve!" Sakura said, laughing.

"I guess some things stuck from training." Syaoran said sarcastically.

Sakura smiled. "So can I still help you pack tonight, or are you finished...?"

Syaoran glanced over at Sakura, who was smiling hopefully and innocently at him. "Uh..." He blinked, looking back in front of him. I’ve got to. I’ve got to at least try, after all this stuff happened... "Like an hour after school, is that alright?" He asked, stopping at the gym doors, waiting for her to reply before he went out for the drink he had been going to get.

Sakura smiled. "Of course!" She looked up at the door and saw what he was doing. "I better get back to throwing that discus." She said with mock enthusiasm, glad to see that Syaoran grinned at least a little bit at her own attempt of sarcasm. Sakura skipped away happily to Chihura and Madison and Tamakazi.

Chihura was laughing, her face practially purple, and Tamakazi wore a deep scowl. Madison smiled calmy. "It seems Tamakazi hasn’t taken to his own advice yet." She said.

Sakura looked at the shotput ball only a few feet in front of him, then noticed that he had a hand on his own shoulder. "Oh my." She said, thinking about when she would have to throw this herself.

"Did Syaoran-kun have something important to say?" Madison asked aside to Sakura.

Sakura smiled, successfully lying. "No, I was just congratulating him." She said. Nothing is going to interrupt us this time She thought determinedly.

---------

Syaoran walked glumly down the school hall. Sakura was walking with Madison a good thirty feet down in front of him, heading out the door and chattering excitedly about something unimportant. Syaoran looked down at the glaring floor tile. You can’t just leave her so unprotected, so helpless. What kind of person are you? The kind that wouldn’t abandon your mother. Damn it. Why does it have to be this hard of a conflict? Syaoran stepped out into the spring air, annoyed that it was sunny.

He kicked at invisible rocks as he shuffled his feet along to his apartment. He walked alone up the stairs, unlocking his apartment quietly, then stepped into the room, knowing what he was going to do. Syaoran walked with determination over to the phone. He more reluctantly dialed the phone number he hated to dial, then waited impatiently for someone to answer.

"’Moshi?" Meilin’s high voice answered.

Syaoran almost sighed. "Is one of my sisters home?" He asked dully.

"SYAORAN! SYAORAN SYAORAN SYAORAN!" Meilin shreiked into the phone. "I’m going to come to the airport to pick you up! I can’t wait, I miss you so much out here! There’s some new people out here, they’re involved over at the stable, and then of course there’s all our old equine friends! And the weather is positively-"

"Meilin! Let me talk to my sister!" He ordered.

Meilin sighed loudly on the other side. "I’ll see you tommorrow." She grouched, and Syaoran listened as the phone was handed off.

"Hey little brother, what’s up? Is it the movers? I called to make sure they didn’t take your furniture until tommorrow, did they come for it early-"

"No, listen, I was just calling about, um, I just wanted to ask if there was any way I could...delay, just for a few weeks. I know you guys want me to come but I can’t-"

"Delay!?" She screeched, and Meilin’s voice was heard shouting ‘what!?’ in the backround. "Of course you can’t, do you know how hard it has been getting along for this much time without you? It’s awful, mother is still...getting worse, even though all this medicine-"

"I know!" Syaoran shouted, frustrated because he had already battled that side in his head. "But you don’t understand, the cards are going really dangerous here, they-"

"Leave it for the card mistress! It’s not your business until the elders make it yours. You need to be here right now, we need you- mother needs you."

Syaoran grit his teeth. He was silent for a few seconds before finishing his decision. His sister cut in before he could speak. "Can we count on you being there tommorrow?"

Syaoran frowned furiously at his feet, his eyes having a strange tingle to them, burning with the weight of this decision, one that he felt like he didn’t have a choice but to go along with them. "I’ll see you tommorrow." He said bitterly, confirming what she had said, hanging the phone up before he could hear her response.

Syaoran collapsed on the undamaged couch, leaning his head back. Sakura will be here in a little while. You should probably at least change out of your school uniform. Syaoran dragged his feet into his room and pulled out the last of his clothes that weren’t packed. I could go for some chocolate right now. Of course that doesn’t matter. What I want is so insignificant to what others want me to do. Syaoran switched clothes and walked out of the room, slowing to see his reflection in a mirror he had pulled off the wall. He looked away with shame, feeling that he was betraying Sakura and himself.

I can’t help it! I have to help my mother, what kind of person would I be if I didn’t? Syaoran walked furiously down the hall into the living room, turning up the radio as loud as he could stand it to drown out his thoughts, then started repacking the spell books he had taken out to look for reverse spells to Chindra’s disappearance.

After the last box of books was done and Syaoran was working on packing up all the kitchen stuff, he looked up as he thought he heard a knock on the door. Syaoran jumped up, hurrying over to the stereo and turning it down, then walking over to the door, opening it to see Sakura’s smiling face. She held up a candy bar, holding it out for him.

Syaoran hesitantly took it, amazed at the irony of that simple present. Sakura walked in, chewing on another coconut granola thing, looking around. "You’ve done alot of this by yourself." She commented, seeing that practically everything was stripped empty.

Syaoran looked down at the Sky bar she had given to him with amazement for a few more seconds, then looked up. "Yeah, I guess." He said.

Sakura smiled, then turned to him, meeting his watching eyes with forced happiness. "Where do I start?" She asked.

Syaoran couldn’t help notice with a feeling of dismay the amount of effort Sakura was putting into keeping herself cheery. "Yeah, uh, come on." Syaoran said, leading her into the hall. He stopped and picked up the heavy boxes of books and dragged them into the living room. Sakura helped, setting them down next to the ones Syaoran was putting down. Once they were all relocated, Syaoran said, "Okay. There’s some packaging tape on the counter, you can tape these."

Sakura smiled and nodded, then walked over the counter. She picked the large dispense of tape and sat down next to the first box, looking up to see what Syaoran was doing. He was packing silverware away. "Does Meilin know you are coming?" Sakura asked, pulling out the first strand of tape.

"Yes." Syaoran said, chewing on the first section of the Sky bar.

"Oh." Sakura said, looking back to her tape. She listened to the music playing over the stereo. "SES, I like this song." Sakura said, then began singing along. "Funny how our dreams come true..."

Syaoran glanced up for a second, hearing an added voice to the song playing, then looked back to the box he was packing, feeling even more awful about leaving. "There’s more CDs by the stereo, if you want to listen to them." He said.

"Maybe after this song ends." Sakura said, finishing taping that box.

"Has your father seen your house yet?"

Sakura glowered thinking about her father, because that made her think of her brother, and that made her think bad thoughts. "Yes. He thinks vandals broke in. We fixed my window- I must of missed that, I was assuming you or Bob broke it- and we’ve got a fridge, but we still are without a microwave and stove."

"So you are eating cold food?" Syaoran asked unsurely.

"Yesterday was take out." Sakura answered.

Syaoran moved to the next drawer of the kitchen. "What about...what about Chindra? Have they asked about that?"

Sakura slowed temporarily, saddening as she heard her friend’s name, hesitating to speak.

"I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have ask-"

"No, it’s okay." Sakura said, a bit touched with Syaoran’s attempts to understand her. "They just think she’s on some business. I should tell them, probably, shouldn’t I? That she left, she isn’t coming back..."

"She will come back, don’t worry, we’ll figure something out."

"But you’re going to be gone!" Sakura contested, looking up through her glossy eyes at Syaoran, who was in the kitchen looking back at her.

Syaoran quickly looked away, shading his eyes with his long eyelashes. "I can’t help it, Sakura, I’ve tried but-"

"But everything’s falling apart!" Sakura said, fighting hard against the tears threatening to pour.

"I can’t stay!" Syaoran practically shouted, hating how he was starting to doubt the decision he had made so firmly earlier.

Sakura looked down hard at the box in front of her, frowning, not understanding Syaoran’s reasoning. "I just don’t understand..."

Syaoran continued packing boxes, chewing on the inside of his cheek to keep from speaking the numerous thoughts that were rattling through his mind. Sakura sighed as she knew Syaoran wasn’t going to speak on that subject anymore, and she may as well give it up. She finally gathered herself up to talk again. "I just didn’t think you would really leave, I’m sorry, but...It doesn’t matter, it’s not like you are leaving forever, I’m sure I’ll be fine, just like everyone else says...but I still..."

Syaoran was cringing at the harsh irony in her words. Not leaving forever. The elders will see to it that they make a liar out of me. "Can you put a CD in, I hate this song." Syaoran said, switching subjects as the gap in the conversation seemed to permit.

Sakura looked up from her box and nodded. "Sure." She said, getting up and walking over to the stereo. She looked through the CDs he had, most of them were burned and taken off the computer, only his hand writing scribbling out what was on them. She took out one that said ‘Shiro-Ame’ happily, putting it into the CD player and happily skipping back to her box. "I didn’t know you like them." Sakura said. "Did you ever hear about the concert we went to?"

Syaoran couldn’t beleive Sakura sometimes; he had heard that story about three thousand times, though obviously she hadn’t remembered that. Syaoran decided to play with fire a little. "I don’t think so." He said, feeling a little bad for taking advantage of her for the moment, but he told himself it was only making use of a good situation.

"Oh, well, it’s kind of long, but I’ll shorten it. So I went to the Shiro-Ame concert, and me and Madison and Chindra went and stood right where their lead guitarist plays..." Sakura slowed a little bit, remembering her earlier suspicions of Syaoran. She glanced up at him, who had an oblivious scowl on his face, looking very un-Komai-like, his feiry amber eyes reflected sunlight in the room, looking completly different from the chocolate eyes Sakura had looked up into. "Oh, but before that; well see they had to postpone it cause the guitarist was sick, so we had to stay at a hotel the night before, anyway, oh, I meant to ask, were you sick that day? The sensei said you had been gone that day as well."

"Oh, uh, I was (dang it, why did I never think of that peice of evidence?) sick, yeah, just a bad head cold, it went away fairly quickly, I just stayed home as a precaution- you know- relapses are bad, I didn’t want any pneumonia coming back." Syaoran said, stumbling over his own words.

Sakura took that explaination sincerely. "I’m glad you didn’t get really sick. Anyway, we were right next to the stage; me and Chindra and Madison. Madison had made us some really cool clothes to wear...so the concert started and we were like right next to him. And he umm....winked at Chindra, I think it was me, I don’t know, but Chindra was so set on it being her..." Sakura stopped, thinking about her disappeared friend. Syaoran was about to cut in on the sad silence when Sakura continued. "but anyway, he pulled me on stage! Right on stage, I was so freaked out! It was even on TV, I think, Madison has it on tape, anyway, oh my gosh, I was so scared! More scared then when we first saw the ghost, I think, and he gave me his autograph, it was so wonderful." Sakura said, giving a dreamy sigh at the end of her story.

Syaoran was having the hardest time not grinning where he was, and he could only look at the box in front of him with a contained smile, his eyes sparkling. "You like him better than Keanu Reeves?" Syaoran asked curiously.

Sakura was surprised Syaoran had even remembered that she liked Keanu, but she threw that aside and faced the question. "Definitely. I don’t think even Keanu could be as...ahh...I don’t know." She leaned back, staring with starry eyes up at the ceiling, then blinked back to real life. "You don’t want to be hearing this. I’m sorry."

Syaoran had to hold back the urge to laugh, something he rarely felt, and forced a scowl onto his face. "Hey, as long as you’re happy." He said sarcastically, biting into the last peice of the candy bar to keep himself quiet.

"Who wouldn’t be with him..." Sakura said, blinking at the stars starting to float back into her eyes, then went back to taping the boxes in front of her. And who wouldn’t be with you, Li Syaoran? I meant what I said to Touya, now why can’t I say it to you? I am too scared? But I don’t feel scared for myself. I don’t have anything to lose. I won’t see you again for who knows how long, I can’t be scared like that so what is it?... Sakura frowned at her conflicting feelings.

Syaoran hid the cat grin successfully, then walked around the counter. "I am going to get the boxes from my room." Syaoran said, walking into his room. He dragged the boxes of clothes into the hall, then into the living room, near where Sakura was still taping. He knelt down and began taping down the box in front of him.

"Do you have the same summer break time in Hong Kong that we do here?" Sakura asked.

"I will be in school most of the summer." Syaoran said, a bit annoyed as this fact presented itself, he having forgotten about it.

"That stinks." Sakura said, humming to the Shiro-Ame song playing. "Maybe someday Shiro-Ame will record in Madison’s studio she is building." Sakura said. She looked up from the umpteenth box she was doing. "I was thinking: how did you whistle for Moondust? If I am going to try and get her to like me, I should probably call her the same way you do."

Syaoran looked up uncertainly from his tape. How do you whistle? That’s a stupid question, or is it a stupid question because I don’t want to answer? "You just put your thumb and index finger together and-" He demonstrated, a clean silence breaking whistle that rung through the entire apartment.

Sakura frowned with concentration and attempted, but only a weak windy noise escaped her mouth. She looked down with dismay. "I guess I’ll have to work on that, along with everything else."

"That reminds me-" Syaoran said, getting to his feet and walking around the counter where he had a pile of books for Sakura. "These are those spell books." He said, walking back into the living room and setting the stack of books in front of her, sneezing once as the dust flew up from the unsettling action he had just done.

Sakura looked at the cover of the top and smiled gratefully. "Arigato (thanks)!" She said brightly.

Syaoran half grinned and met her eyes for a moment, before deffering his eyes away. He looked to the clock, where their last hours were ticking away quickly. Tommorrow morning. You will be gone. And only the elders will decide when you will return. Syaoran sighed inwardly, then knelt back down, starting again on the taping job.

"You are thinking; tommorrow you have to leave." Sakura guessed, looking at him.

Syaoran kept his eyes low, not daring to look up. "I can’t do anything about it." He fought with her words, the truth in them being the same truth he fought in his own mind.

Sakura sighed loudly, making sure he heard it, because that was the only way she could sum up how she felt.

"It’s not like I want to leave." Syaoran said again, an angry scowl starting to go over his previous calm expression.

"I didn’t say that." Sakura said a bit bitterly. She was quiet for a while, then she spoke. "Are you leaving tommorrow the same time we go to school?" Sakura asked.

"Yes." Syaoran said, not looking up.

"Oh." Sakura said, feeling a teary glaze start to spread over her green eyes. She continued taping the package silently, not even humming along with her favorite song on this album. After a while, she spoke again, finally starting to accept the truth. "Can we write each other?" She finally asked.

"Of course." Syaoran said. He looked back up at the clock, hating it for moving. He looked towards the balcony window, where it the sun was setting. He sighed, knowing he should be responsible, though he didn’t want to be. "You..." He started, not wanting to say it. "You should probably get home, it’s getting dark..." Syaoran forced himself to say.

Sakura looked up sadly, seeing that the sun was setting. "Yeah..." Sakura said. She glanced up nervously at Syaoran, words at the tip of her tongue, but not making it out. She stood up, a bit frustrated with herself, and picked up the pile of books.

Syaoran stood up, forcing his eyes up, looking with sadness at Sakura’s hurt and misunderstanding eyes. "Please take care of yourself." He said sincerely.

Sakura looked down, frowing her eyelashes over her eyes. Say it! Just say it! "I’ll miss you, Syaoran-kun, and..." Sakura bit her lip, looking up again, meeting his watching amber eyes. "I hope your mother is alright." She said, with a bit of disappointment in her own voice, as those words weren’t the ones she had wanted to come out. She glanced up once more meeting his eyes, then turned and walked to the door, knowing that he was following her politely.

Syaoran walked past her and opened the door for her as her hands were slightly tied up holding on to the books, watching her watch him through the corner of her green eyes. She turned to him in the doorway, not wanting to walk away with things unsaid. Sakura, with much frustration, forced her mouth open, about to force the words out if she had to, but was cut of by Syaoran.

"Goodbye, Sakura, for now." He said, a softened expression across his face, full understanding in the warm smile he was giving her. The look Sakura had had on her face gave Syaoran a full understanding of what she was feeling, and Syaoran knew if she was to say what he thought she was going to say, things would become so much more difficult, and it would be much easier this way, if things were left alone.

Sakura melted away by that look, and returned a full smile back at him. "Bye." She said, though the simple word seemed so out of place. She turned and forced her numb legs to walk down the hallway, full reality hitting her. She turned once more reaching the stairs to look toward his doorway, but it was shut. Sakura frowned with anger and sadness as everything hit her at once. She walked down the stairs unable to comprehend everything, the young age she was at.

Sakura walked out of the lobby with increasing feelings. How am I supposed to deal with this? I can’t be alone! I don’t, I mean, I just can’t deal with this, not alone! Don’t they see that? I’m not strong enough, they all tell me I’m something I’m not. I am never going to be able to deal with this! She walked onto the outside pavement with tears starting to form, and tried to keep them back as she walked across the parking lot. Once she reached the sidewalk, she stopped fighting and admitted defeat, letting her tears fall down at their leisure.

No one, not even Chindra or Syaoran, could comfort me now. They are both gone, or going to be shortly. I will be alone. Sakura dragged her feet the rest of the way to her house, glad that no one was in the living room or kitchen, or they would have seen her tears, so Sakura continued up the stairs to her room, where she collapsed on her bed and cried.

___________________________________________________________________

Last time Syaoran left for Hong Kong I didn’t cry this much. These past two years he’s gone back without even telling me, I didn’t even notice, I didn’t care... Sakura got up and found it raining outside. So appropriate. She walked to her closet and pulled on her uniform, wishing breifly that she was running late, then she wouldn’t have as much time to think about all the sad things. But the truth was, she had hardly been able to get the sleep she did, there was no way she could sleep in this morning. Maybe...maybe I can catch him before he leaves! I can tell him...Sakura brightened slightly at this idea, so she hurried downstairs, brushing her hair as she went, and grabbed her rain coat. Sakura searched around for her rollerskates, quickly finding them and pulling them on.

Sakura made sure they were tight, then hurried out the door, skating down the sidewalk as fast as she could go. She made a broad turn around to go to Syaoran’s house, passing the fairly quiet school on the way around. She skated as hard as she could to the parking lot and skated right into the lobby, ignorant that she was being so rude, skating to the elevator. Sakura waited impatiently for it to go one floor up. She skated out and walked down the hall, looking towards Syaoran’s apartment. Sakura reached the door and put her hand up to it, about to knock.

There’s no one there. I can feel it. Sakura weakly banged her fist once against the door, though she knew no one would answer. He already left. Tears started to prick at the corner of her eyes. No! I know he’s coming back, this isn’t the end of the world, Syaoran goes to Hong Kong all the time. The depths of Sakura’s mind reminded her this didn’t seem like one of those times, this seemed different somehow. I better go to school.

Sakura skated to the elevator and then into the lobby, skating back out into the rain. She didn’t bother to put up her hood, feeling like the rain would help in drowning out her thoughts. He’s just leaving. Just like that. Sakura angrily pushed her legs down the sidewalk, taking the long way around to the school. She skated down the sidewalk, oblivious to the rain drenching her, tears falling occassionally. When did I become so weak? Is this really as bad as I’m making it?

Sakura stopped at a traffic light to wait to cross, pressing the button the signals traffic to stop. She leaned against the pole and waited for the light to change. Sakura looked up at the bus that was slowing to a halt as the light was turning red. Sakura was about to cross the street as her eyes were drawn straight through glass to Syaoran’s watching amber eyes. Sakura blinked, not sure what to do. I could wave. She just looked at him with hoping large teary green eyes, praying that he might decide to get off the bus, to come out and hold her and tell her he wouldn’t ever leave. But he didn’t move, only sat with his headphones on his head, blinking back at her like from a dream.

Either the look Sakura had been giving him was too much for him to handle, or he was bored with it, but Syaoran, with one final blink, looked away, his eyes going down, breaking away. Sakura stared at him still, ignoring the fact that the bus had stopped so she could cross, only concentrating on the fact Syaoran had just looked away. She frowned at him, tears filling her eyes again. When he didn’t look up, Sakura, with much frustration, turned and forgot about this route to school, and furiously skated away, taking a round about way, getting away from the bus sitting waiting for the light to change again.

___________________________________________________________________

"One hundred yen." The clerk said.

Syaoran handed him the money and took the pack of gum, walking out of the small airport shop and to the terminal he was departing from. This would be the first time he travelled completly alone, but that wasn’t what was bothering him. He sat down in the airport chair and yawned, the late night and early morning packing getting to him. Syaoran looked at his watch and saw the plane would be boarding soon, and he’d soon be flying away.

The attendant called over the intercom that children and infants were boarding now. Syaoran wondered if he qualified, but decided to wait, he wasn’t anxious to get on the plane. Do I expect her to come to the airport? No. So why am I waiting? Syaoran shifted positions in the chair, leaning on his hand and trying to keep his eyes open. The plane was relatively small, and after about ten mintues, the attendant started calling off rows. Syaoran got up when he heard his and waited in line to get their tickets and passports checked. He showed his to the attendant and she smiled, directing him to the plane. Syaoran walked reluctantly down the boarding ramp, stepping slowly into the plane, forcing his mind to only concentrate on looking for his seat.

He walked down the aisle and found that he had an aisle seat. Syaoran would have preferred window seat, but he wasn’t going to complain, nothing seemed to go for him anyway. He shoved his small carry on bag in the overhead compartment, he hadn’t really needed anything to bring with him for the short plane ride, but in case he got bored, Syaoran had broughtten along some books to read, some paper and pencils, in case he decided to write Sakura. Syaoran was about to sit down when a man tapped him on the shoulder. "I think we’re plane ride partners- C2?"

Syaoran nodded and stood up so the man could sit down in his seat. "This may be an odd request, but if you wouldn’t mind, could we switch sides? These darn airplanes don’t give you any leg room, and for an old folk like myself, these stiff joints get jammed up sitting in the window seat." The man said.

There was always a small ray of hope. Syaoran nodded. "I like the window seat anyway." Syaoran mumbled, shuffling into the seat. The older fellow set his things in the overhead compartment, then sat down.

"Thanks, my knees appreciate it. You are travelling by yourself?" The man asked him.

"Yes." Syaoran said, looking out the window with a sorrowful expression, looking at the pavement under the plane, cherishing the last bit of blacktop he got to see in Japan.

The man didn’t say anything for then, leaving Syaoran to look out the window sadly. After the plane was boarded, the attendant instructed them about all the safety precautions and blah blah blah, then their plane was taxied out to the runway. Syaoran sighed as he watched the last of Japan’s runway disappear under their tires.

The plane took off and Syaoran leaned back in his seat and tried to close his eyes, knowing that he was really gone. Now I’ve got to think about Hong Kong. Syaoran’s thoughts slowly shifted to what he was going to be doing at home. Syaoran leaned against his seat and watched the clouds fluff underneath the plane, looked around at the rain clouds they were breaking through.

"Do you know some people in Hong Kong?" The man beside him asked.

Syaoran blinked and realized he was being summoned to reality. "Uh, yes, my family lives there." He answered.

"So you were visiting friends in Japan?" The man asked.

"Yes." Syaoran said, sighing sadly.

"But you didn’t want to leave." The man observed.

Syaoran glanced at the man for a second. What will it hurt? "No, I have a friend that needs help, I didn’t want to leave them alone."

The man nodded. "But your family needs you back?"

"My family needs help as well." Syaoran answered.

"This friend; a boy or girl?"

Syaoran wasn’t too into airplane conversations, but he knew the chances of seeing this man again in his life were close to zero, so he figured getting some advice wouldn’t be that bad of an idea. "A girl." Syaoran confirmed.

"I would have guessed, you have the look of a man leaving his wife to go to war." The man said, smiling.

Syaoran blinked and looked down; that was a very accurate description. "It feels that way." Syaoran said.

"You are afraid she doesn’t understand why you have to leave?" The man guessed.

Syaoran looked at the man, studying his caring older eyes, his wise face, before answering, this man seemed to know so much about him. "Yes, she tries to, but..."

"But you don’t think she could completly understand. So you want to do something for her so she’d know you don’t want to ever leave her completely."

Syaoran thought about that for a second. This man was giving elderly advice, he had never had a father figure, no one ever gave him advice on anything, so the open kindness of this man was a bit bewildering. "But nothing fits."

The man smiled and sat back in thought. "Does she like poems? Of course she does, all girls like poems." The man pulled out some spare paper and a pen. He pulled down the tray in front of Syaoran and set the paper down.

Syaoran picked up the pen and looked up blankly. The man shrugged. "I cannot write it for you, it’s your feelings that like her, am I right?"

Syaoran nodded.

"Well we need a title, every poem has a title."

Syaoran wasn’t too into this poem idea, he didn’t like poems, they seemed a little corny for him.

"What’s her name?"

"S-Sakura." Syaoran said, stumbling a little over her name as it made him think of her again.

The man smiled. "Okay. Cherry Blossoms, think spring things. What kind of eyes does she have?"

"Green." Syaoran said, sighing a bit as he thought about her eyes, filled with tears, looking at him across the street.

"I can see we are going to have to provoke some romaticsm out of you yet. Don’t think straight facts; love poems aren’t like that, they often don’t make sense, only to the two people that could understand it. Green like a cat’s or..."

"No, like, like a puppy’s...or wait..." Syaoran smiled with frustration, he wasn’t very good at this.

"Are you trying to say they are large and innocent; kind of like pools of youth?"

Syaoran hated the man for so easily wording that. "You write it." He said, setting the paper in front him, putting the pencil in his hand.

The man smiled and sighed, setting the paper back in front of Syaoran. "Maybe a picture, can you draw?"
Syaoran nodded as if that was a stupid question.

"What is something you both share a liking for?"

Each other, I hope. Who knows, I may never... "Um....a ...a horse." Syaoran said unsurely, not certain if that was a good standard to draw or not.

"Okay. There you go! Now draw that horse in the most romantic way you can. A moonlit picture or something." The man said.

Syaoran wasn’t usually the type to take orders freely from strangers, but this man seemed trustworthy enough, he was just trying to help, and Syaroan didn’t exactly feel like fighting at the moment. Syaoran took the pencil up and started sketching out Moondust’s general form in a half rearing pose. After he got that done, he showed it to the man for approval.

"Wonderful! Now get the details, the shading, the backround..."

Syaoran took the paper back and began drawing with furious concentration. He outlined her muscles, shading in areas appropriate, then drew the moon and trees around her.An ingenuis idea of falling cherry blossoms in the picture came across Syaoran’s mind, and he quickly drew it in. He held the finished version up for the man. "Now stick a stamp on that and send it to her! She’ll love it."

Syaoran took the paper back and thought about that. I couldn’t actually send this to her, that’s stupid. Syaoran just nodded and set his tray back. He looked at the man who was leaning against his chair with his eyes closed, resting peacefully. Syaoran looked back out the window, back in thought. What would life have been like if I did have a father? Completly different than it is now. If only I wouldn’t have...

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Syaoran stepped off the plane into the boarding ramp with a feeling of fatigue. He didn’t want to go see his family, not if they were going to take charge of his life again...Syaoran forced his feet to move, offering a wave to the man that had sat next to him as he walked by. Syaoran adjusted his bag on his shoulder and stepped out of the ramp onto the airport tile floor. Syaoran met across the distace of a few feet several pairs of happy eyes.

"Syaoran!" A girl with jet black hair exlcaimed.

"Little brother!" A chorus of similiar voices called.

The group of different girls all ran over to him, hugging him from different sides. Syaoran squirmed out eventually and glared at them, wanting to go home, not hang out in this airport. Meilin was still clinging to his arm. Syaoran pulled at her arm. "Meilin let go of me." He said, annoyed.

Meiiln let go, stepping back. "Seems Syaoran developed a bad mood."

"You know how air travel is, the leg room is just awful!" One of his sisters agreed.

"Can we leave?" Syaoran asked, annoyed.

"Look at our little brother, he is so adorable! He grew!" Squeaked one of his sisters. Syaoran sighed, remembering what his family life was like. He wasn’t sure how he stayed sane before.

"The poor boy is probably tired out, come on, we should bring him home." His oldest sister agreed.

The big group of them walked through the airport, stopping temporarily to get his luggage from the conveyer belt, then continuing down the halls. They reached the doors and Syaoran stepped out into the hot and humid air of Hong Kong. He couldn’t beleive he had actually needed the light jacket he was wearing in Japan, and he quickly shed it. He followed the group of girls with Meilin hanging on his side across the busy parking lot, almost getting hit by a car for an instant where Meilin hadn’t been paying attention.

Syaoran climbed into the van his older sister had driven to the airport. He looked out the window glumly, the change already hitting him. Meilin smiled at him, her face was a littler darker and tanned since she had left Japan, and her eyes had brightened a little more. "How did the cards go the two long weeks we were apart?"

"Fine." Syaoran mumbled, looking away.

"Have you and Sakura told each other of your burrowed hate for each other yet?" She asked jokingly.

Syaoran turned and glared at her in response. He turned his eyes to his sister who was driving. "When can we see mother?" He asked.

"Tommorrow maybe. We have to get your room ready, we had some guests staying in it while they were moving into their house, hope you don’t mind."

Syaoran stayed silent in the seat. I came here to see my mother. That’s what I want to do. "I got some money for her hospital bills." Syaoran said, remembering the money he had gotten from the concert that he had filled in.

"How much?" Asked his sister.

"Five thousand yen. We’ll have to get it exchanged, but..."

"That will help, thanks, but you understand- if the elders decide to quit supporting her....I don’t know what we’re going to do..."

"I can get a job." Syaoran said.

"That probably wouldn’t be enough." Meilin said next to him.

"Thanks little brother, but I think the only way we are going to get through this is with the elder’s help. If you are doing missions for them, they couldn’t just abandon our family, so if you would keep training..."

"You want me to just forget about my assignment in Japan?" Syaoran asked.

"You’re done there, as far as the elders are concerned. You can’t think about that right now, if they would let me, I would, beleive me, I tried, but..." Her voice trailed off.

Syaoran looked out the window at the scenery as they drove into the suburbs of the city, slowly leaving the high traffic city life. He watched the houses melt away into the quieter countryside, and saw they were slowly coming upon his house. I haven’t been here in a long time. I wonder what has changed? More people joining the clan, that’s what Meilin said. Great. And I have to go to school, plus training again...

Syaoran shifted in his seat as they drove into the long driveway, waiting impatiently to get out of the car. They parked in front of the house so Syaoran could carry in his luggage. He got out of the car back into the hot Hong Kong spring, and walked to the back of the van, pulling thr trunk open. He took his suitcases out and walked to the front door of his house, taking a breath, then stepped in.

He immediatly remembered everything about the house once he was inside and breathing the air he had breathed so many times before. Syaoran walked up the long open stairs and walked to his room, which was, as his sisters said, much different than it used to be. He set his suitcases down then shut the door, walking over to his suitcases and pulling out clothes. He took out the first good Tshirt he could find, then looked through for a good pair of loose pants. Finally finding a pair of tearaways he wore to soccer practice often, he loosely buttoned up the sides, then walked back out of his room, trotting down the stairs to see what his sisters and Meilin were up to.

"What do you want to eat, little champion?" Asked his oldest sister.

"Just some water." He mumbled, walking into the kitchen.

His second youngest sister turned and looked at him with awe. "You are growing up so fast." She said, dreamy tears in her eyes.

"Just water. How responsible." His older sister said.

"Women love a responsible man." His oldest sister agreed.

Syaoran rolled his eyes and walked over to get a glass of water for himself. Once getting it, he sat down in front of a fan and closed his eyes, clearing his mind. Meilin sat down next to him, her hair up in high buns, her eyes sparkling with good mood. "You want to go see the stable?" Meilin asked, trying to cheer him up.

"In a bit, maybe." Syaoran agreed. The cool water felt good on his throat, and he felt a little better for the first time since being home. "Let’s go." He said, standing up and setting down the empty glass and looking towards the door, wanting to get outside.

Meilin happily ran after him, skipping. "Have you lost speed since I last saw you?" She asked joking, sprinting by him as she threw open the door and ran outside.

Syaoran grinned at the invitation to a race, and quickly sprinted, running right past her down the path to the stables. He continued sprinting until he reached the cement sidewalk leading into the barn, and slowed to a walk, letting Meilin catch up. They walked in, feeling the immediate breeze off the fans tied to the stall doors that kept the preformance and war horses cool.

Syaoran walked quickly to a stall he knew, peering in through the bars at the little brown pony inside. "Iata!" Syaoran said softly. The pony looked up and its eyes seemed to change. The pony walked up to the bars, sniffing Syaoran’s hand and then whinnying loudly. Syaoran had to grin at the little pony, then he turned to see what Meilin was doing.

"Look at this horse, she’s so pretty! She belongs to the new people, I think." Meilin said, pointing at the pretty and sleek palimino horse inside. The horse ignored them snobbishly, so Meilin and Syaoran turned and looked around at the other stalls.

Syaoran slowed to a stop as Meilin was peering into a large pasture that held one large horse in it. Meilin looked over at Syaoran with softened eyes, then quickly looked for a way to switch subjects. "You should brush Iata, he must of missed you." Meilin said, walking back over to the little pony’s stall.

Syaoran nodded and walked to the tack room where they kept brushes and saddles and etc. Syaoran pulled some brushes out of the boxes they were in, then grabbed some carrots. He walked back down the aisle and let himself into the stall. The pony stood completly still, enjoying the attention, his eyelids half shut as the brushes ran over him. Syaoran brushed over the horse’s untamed mane and tale, then stepped back, looking over the brushing job.

Iata looked blankly at him, a distraught look on the little pony’s face as he wondered why Syaoran had stopped. Syaoran had to grin at the pony’s human-like expression. He searched through his pockets for anything to feed him, but not finding any, Syaoran slipped out of the stall back to the tackroom. He put the brushes back and searched for a bag of carrots or apples. Finally finding a stray apple placed on a bench, Syaoran walked back out of the room.

He passed Meilin, who was gazing at the Palomino once more. "If you like her so much, why don’t you see if they’ll let you ride her?"

"Because she’s temperamental." Meilin explained, her eyes not leaving the horse, which was still successfully ignoring all activity around her.

Syaoran shrugged and walked back over to Iata, feeding him a carrot through the stall bars. He turned to Meilin. "I’m going back to the house." Meilin stared at the horse covetously for a while longer, then ran after Syaoran, and they walked back up to the house.

They walked through the hot air back into the cool house. Syaoran’s sisters were preparing some type of food, his youngest sister having some difficulty with the task of mixing a batter. "The point is to have no clumps in it, it’s not chunky soup."

"I don’t know!" She said in frustration. "The title was chocolate chunk, it sounded like it was s’pose to be like this. Cooking’s not my thing, okay?"

"No, patience is a quality you need to be working on." His oldest sister said wisely. "You want to eat so badly, that you don’t even wait to prepare the food properly. How will you ever provide for a family?" She asked, sighing hopelessly.

His youngest sister sighed and looked up at Syaoran and Meilin, who were watching as they walked into the kitchen. "Come, champion chef. You stir this."

Syaoran looked at her with annoyance as he walked over and took the whisks from her. He quickly stirred through, the whisks stirred away any clumps of flour, and within seconds, the batter was smooth. He looked up at his sister, who was gazing off blankly, not watching, so he assumed her position, and started pouring the batter into a pan. "I want to see mother tonight." He persisted.

"Come on, Syaoran. You just got back, can’t you rest for a day?"

"I came to see her. It would make sense we make that the first order of business, wouldn’t it?"

"No, you came back to come home." His oldest sister said firmly. She sighed. "I suppose we might make a quick trip to the hospital this evening."

Syaoran was at least a little more satisfied with that answer, though her first sentence was driving the back of his mind insane. His problem about getting back to Japan was ever being made more difficult. You act like this is just a trip, but everyone else thinks of it as you are coming home. Now your trips to Japan are going to be visits, not trips back home. Unless you can brave the elders...Syaoran started telling himself.

"I can drive him over after my afternoon classes if you want to stay home and study for your calc test." His second oldest sister said.

"No, that’s okay. If we go, we should go as a family. I’m not sure, though, tommorrow would still probably be better." His oldest sister said.

_____________________________________________________________________

Syaoran walked nervously beside Meilin through the echoing hospital walls. It was the next day; his sisters had went back on their word and forced Syaoran to sleep one sleepless night in his room before taking him to see his mother. So a whole day more miserable, more alone and missing Japan, he was following his sisters reluctantly through the tile hallways. He hated hospitals, he hated doctors, and he hated seeing ones he loved in pain, but put all that together and...well poor Syaoran was in a fix. "Is she sharing a room with anyone?" Syaoran asked Meilin aside.

"Not when I last saw." Meilin said.

At least that’s a little better. Syaoran didn’t know if he could handle seeing his mother deathly ill, but he hadn’t thought she was really all that bad...did he assume wrongly? From the way people were talking, he was getting very nervous about walking into that hospital room and finding the state of his mother’s health. She is strong. She can fight it. I’m sure.

The family slowed to a halt as his oldest sister gently opened the door into the hospital room. Syaoran filed in with his sisters and walked into the room. His mother was sitting on her bed, a book in her lap, which she was reading intently. As the crowd’s movement caught her eye, she looked up, and a slow smile spread across her face as she saw Syaoran, who forced a brave expression across his face.

"Syaoran-san, when did you arrive in Hong Kong?" She asked, happiness shining like beacons through her eyes.

Syaoran glanced at the floor, feeling horribly for not coming sooner, and seeing his mother in the hospital gown making his stomach feel slightly off. "Yesterday."

"He wanted to come yesterday, but we made him stay home and rest from the flight." Meilin explained, smiling.

"Was your flight alright?" His mother inquired.

"Yes." Syaoran said, looking back up, more closely studying her. She did look sick, but not near death as Syaoran had been afraid she might look, and her eyes were still clear. "Though I had a hard time sleeping on a bed that wasn’t my own." He said, adding an annoyed glance at his sister.

"The Chincauwas children were staying in our house for a couple days, we told you about that, and we still haven’t fixed Syaoran’s room back the way it was." His sister explained.

"Ah, yes." His mother said. She asked Syaoran more about the travel home, then went into past business, Amy’s family, the stable business, things of that genre. Syaoran tried to talk freely with her, but he found himself falling short of what he wanted to say, not sure how to talk with his mother that he hadn’t seen for so long, who was so sick that she was staying in a hospital.

There was a silence in the room for a while after the last comments, when his mother broke the silence again. "I’m afraid I’m not the greatest conversationalist at the moment, the nurses are making me sleep in the day time along with night time sleep, though I find I do not get the same fulfilling sleep through the night that I used to. I feel rather tired through midday." She explained herself.

Syaoran frowned at the floor, not liking the sound of that. His mother? Sleeping in the day time? He was having a hard time accepting this, no matter how solemn he looked on the outside. His insides churned with the thoughts of anything really bad happening to his mother, he couldn’t bear that, it would be beyond his comprehension. "We have been here for a while." Syaoran said, apologizing for everyone.

"It was nice to see you, Syaoran." His mother said, smiling warmly at him.

Syaoran could feel the love in her smile, but he felt shame for it, for ignoring her for so long, and he had to look back down at the floor. "We’ll visit again soon." Syaoran promised.

His sisters said their goodbyes, and he followed them back out. Once the door was shut, Meilin looked curiously at Syaoran. After being fed up with her looking at him, Syaoran finally spoke. "What?" He asked irritably.

"Well....what’d you think? There’s obviously some thoughts running through that complicated mind of yours, you make yourself so hard to read."

Syaoran took that partially as a compliment, then addressed the question. "I don’t like it." He said plainly.

"Of course you don’t! No thoughts of deeper value?" Meilin asked.

Syaoran just stared off ahead, ignoring her.

"Syaoran, Syaoran, Syaoran...." Meilin said, her voice trailing off.

Syaoran followed his sisters back to their car and they drove silently home, even Meilin quiet from her usual chatter. They arrived back at the house and Meilin and his sisters had to go off to school, only taking off that morning to visit the hospital. Syaoran didn’t have to start school and training until the Monday of the next week, so he figured he’d better enjoy the time off from the girls while he still could.

Syaoran walked into the house and stopped, looking around with searching eyes for the first time. So many things to bring back memories, so many reminders of the past, lay everywhere in this house. Their family wasn’t one for taking pictures, and there was no family portraits hanging on the walls, but they did have several old paintings Syaoran had remembered gazing at for hours when he was little, trying to figure out what the picture meant.

Syaoran walked into the kitchen, thinking that he could pass away his time by eating, but as he looked at the food, he knew that wasn’t what he wanted. Syaoran walked over to the couch and sat down, letting his thoughts drift around. They want me to stay. To do missions for the elders again. That could get me sent anywhere, I don’t really want to...Will I ever have a real home? Yes, I feel like this is my home, but I also feel like I am missing something. And I left it in Japan.

Syaoran decided to go look for some old spell books that might be around, going to their library, searching endlessly through. He spent the day away into night, his sisters came home (luckily without Meilin), but he continued searching through, history books, records of clan members, anything that might give leads. Syaoran yawned as the night began to catch him. He set the book down and headed back to his room, and he walked through the house only mumbling a sort of ‘goodnight’ to his sisters as he tromped up the stairs.

________________________________________________________________________

"Ohayo." Sakura said glumly to her father Friday morning as she dragged herself into the kitchen.

"You are running late, Sakura-chan." He reminded her, handing her a plate of breakfeast.

Sakura nodded. "I’ll eat quickly." She said, already biting into the omlet. Two days passed, and her mood was no better. She was long over crying and moping, but she couldn’t get her positive energy back, it was just the same dismal feelings swirling around in endless torturing circles.

Sakura finished that and pulled her new rollerblades (bought by efforts of Madison to cheer her up) on and began skating to school. The same thoughts started conflicting in her mind. If Clow Reed wanted me to take his place, why would he ever torture me like this? Is this another one of Eriol’s tests to see if I am strong enough to be the card’s mistress? I would assume give up then endure this. I can’t stand it. Everything’s changed, nothing is the same. Everyone I’m close to, all gone from the old ways. Madison is getting strangely normal again, now that Syaoran is gone, but there’s still something not quite right. Kero is bailing on me every time I need his help. Touya is mean, meaner than ever. And Syaoran...gone.

I should stop thinking selfishly. At least my one parent is well and healthy. I hope Syaoran’s mother isn’t that bad. But why else would he go back? Does he not want to stay? It didn’t seem that way, but how should I know, nothing is as it seems anymore. I hope he’ll call me, write me, something, so I know everything’s alright. Sakura looked at her feet as she skated habitually down the sidewalk to school.

I am changing. I can feel myself slipping away. Why can’t I be happy anymore, like I used to be? I remember, everyone called me innocent, but that was before all of this... it is forcing me to be a different person. I do not like what I am becoming. How will I defeat anything if I do not even like myself? Sakura sighed with exasperation at the unconclusive thoughts. I will just take this one day at a time, and pray nothing happens until Syaoran will return.

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A shorter chapter for once. The ending stinks, though. Well, that’s what happens when I am trying to write on a deadline (GUBBY!). My friend has me on a writing schedule now. Wow. I feel so professional. This stinks, I was in a good mood till I wrote this, now I feel all depressed. I shouldn’t have made Syaoran leave...hmm....no I can’t take this out, it makes the story, I think. Look at the big picutre, folks, don’t stop reading, Syaoran isn’t gone for good (of course!).

well it’s ten thirty here, I’ve got to get going, check on my download of CCS movie 2! yay!

Ja mata ne!

~Syaoran Fan 4 Life~

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