RECAP: So.... let’s see... Sakura finally started to make some progress. Syaoran freaked out and started kissing her, then ended up taking her horse riding to make up for it... they went to a dinner at Tyung’s apartment and found out his sister was engaged.... Syaoran’s panicking because he knows Sakura’s starting to have an effect on him so he went off for an escape, then has to do a mission for the Elders the next day....

Chapter Four -

Sakura yawned, rolled over, and heard a crash. She opened her eyes. She had sent the clock falling to the floor. She slowly stretched out to pick it up, her waking limbs stiff. It read ten thirty. She yawned once more and set the alarm clock on its place on the desk. Sunlight was pouring in through the window. She blinked and sat up, rubbing her eyes. She tried to recall what time it had been when she had finally gone to bed. Syaoran hadn’t been home yet. It had been past one in the morning. She yawned thinking about it.

The sad thing was, Sakura had this inkling that he was out with that stupid girl again. Here she had been having all these revelations about his behavior and was slowly making progress, then he freaked out and did that. Makes sense... I suppose... he’s scared he’s falling in again.... Sakura let out a long sigh. She stretched out her arms, bumping her elbow on the desk. “Ow....” She slowly brought her feet to the floor and stood up. I just have to tell him. That’s all there is to it. I’ll tell him how sorry I am for what happened. That’s the only way things are going to get better. I have to trust him. I know he didn’t mean to do any of that stupid stuff. It was all a byproduct of me deserting him.

She walked to her suitcase and changed into a decent outfit, then walked herself to the full length mirror. She straightened out her hair and put it in a pony tail, rubbed her eyes a few more times to appear more awake, then headed down the hall. Syaoran’s door was open, she immediately noticed. She glanced in as she walked by. It was empty. She looked towards the stairs, pausing at the top. Lai and Rana were in the kitchen, washing dishes. Sakura trotted down the stairs, hoping to find Syaoran somewhere. He wasn’t there.

“Syaoran wanted us to tell you he would be away all day,” Lai said, looking away from the sink.

Sakura walked over to the sink, smiling gratefully. “Mission or something, huh?”

“Yeah...” Lai nodded, then continued washing.

“I can’t believe I slept so late... But last night, he wasn’t even home when I finally went to sleep.” Sakura picked up a dry towel out of habit and began drying.

“Thanks,” Rana said, smiling, and took over rinsing.

“Yeah... He runs an odd schedule. Some days he does nothing but sleep, others.... I don’t think he sleeps more than two hours.”

Sakura stacked some bowls and hurried to keep up. “I’m sorry if I caused any trouble last night at that dinner....”

“No, no, don’t mention it. That’s how they always are, now. Always bickering. Tyung’s always provoking the bear out of him.”

Sakura smiled at the thought. “Yeah... that’s how me and my brother are, I suppose.”

“Ah, you have a younger brother?”

“No, older,” Sakura answered.

“Ah... I think it’s becoming familiar.... dark hair, right?”

Sakura nodded. “You remember us visiting?”

“Wow... that was a long time ago.....” Lai finished the last of the cups.

“Yeah...” Sakura agreed. A thought hit her. “Hey, do you guys happen to know where that one book of Syaoran’s is...?”

“What, the Samurai one he wrote when he was little?”

Sakura nodded.

Rana shook her head. “No... not shortly after you left Syaoran hid it away to never be seen again. I doubt he had the heart to throw it out. It meant too much to him. It’s probably deep within a sock drawer or something...”

Sakura laughed, shaking her head. She finished with the last cup, then stood back, hands on her hips.

“Thanks for the help,” Lai said happily, quickly setting the dishes in their cabinents.

“Sure...” Sakura said, yawning once.

“So when do you leave again? It wasn’t a long visit...”

“Oh, uh.... Day after tomorrow. Well.... morning after tomorrow.” Sakura saddened at the thought. She had little time to finish convincing him. She was progressing fairly quickly, but not that fast.

“It’s a shame. You must visit more often, it’s wonderful having you around.”

Sakura blushed. “Oh... yeah...”

“I don’t want to be intrusive, but you know we’re all wondering it... I mean, what exactly is your guys’ relationship? I mean... strictly magic business....? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want... it’s just been driving me crazy,” Rana laughed loudly, as if a load had been taken off her shoulders. Sakura could feel both of their eyes on her.

“Well um.... I don’t really.... know. To be completely honest....” Sakura smiled weakly. She hated the words being in the open. She decided to try a little harder. “The thing is, there’s been alot of obstacles and um... I think I’m more of a nuisance than anything else to him nowdays...”

Lai stared at her in amazement, then shook her head. “Well, I don’t know about that... He had been with that Chang girl... what’s her name.... but um, when you showed up, he kind of dropped everything it seemed. I don’t know. You two are very curious.”

Sakura laughed weakly, though jealousy was bubbling to the surface. “Oh...hm.”

“Anyways, you’re the only friend Syaoran’s ever kept this long, even if it’s just for magic business. So feel welcome to stop by anytime,” Rana explained further.

Sakura nodded, smiling. This was extremely uncomfortable. She searched for an escape. “Well, thanks very much, I appreciate it.” She glanced towards the stairs. “I think I’m going to call Meilin up, since I’m here all day.”

Both the sisters nodded and then continued into different tasks. Sakura dismissed herself and hurried up the stairs. She scowled once she was out of view. Stupid Chang girl. He knows she’s worthless.... Sakura bit her teeth down together hard. Her jaw ached. She released it. She walked to her purse and searched out her phone. She had left it in the guest room the whole previous day, being so busy with Syaoran. She looked at the display screen. She had six missed calls. She listed the number. It was all from Meilin’s house. Sakura smiled, shaking her head. Meilin would have a cow when she found out what Sakura had been up to.

Sakura dialed Meilin’s number and waited one ring before Meilin’s excited voice answered.

“Anything happen?”

“Um.... I dunno, sort of. Do you want to meet somewhere?”

“Well.... we can go shopping.”

Sakura sighed. “Well.... I’m not driving this time.”

“Alright. I’ll pick you up in five, be ready.”

Sakura glanced at herself in the mirror. There was no need to dress up any further. “Alright.”

Meilin had already hung up. Sakura shook her head in amusement and walked over to the door. She might as well wait outside. She jogged down the stairs, then disappeared outside. The heat hit her like a brick wall. She pulled at the bottom of her shirt for ventilation. She was glad she would be going to an airconditioned mall. She wondered where Syaoran was at the moment. Probably out working in this treacherous heat. She looked up to see a silver sports car turning into the driveway. She hurried to the passenger’s side, longing for the air conditioning of the car.

Meilin backed out of the driveway in the manual car with ease. Sakura turned a vent to face her, then let out a long breath.

“So... I’ve been trying to call you forever!”

Sakura smiled. “I’m sorry, I know. I was busy yesterday.”

“Yeah, like... whenever you went off to that play it was like you two dropped off the face of the planet. So start from there. How did it go?”

“Well, ah....” She cringed. How would she get around ‘and then he jumped on top of me and started kissing me’? “We went to that play... it was kind of awkward. We didn’t really get along through the play. I really don’t like that Chang girl... then um... on the way home, we did talk a little. When we got back there was a bad storm-”

“The power went out?” Meilin guessed, switching lanes on the highway.

“Yeah...” Sakura said, slightly annoyed at the interruption. “But uh.... I talked alot to him. Didn’t really get anywhere, though I think deep down I was doing something. He basically said it was all pointless. But I keep insisting. The next day he took me horse riding-”

“What!” Meilin shrieked.

Sakura smiled sheepishly. “We went riding out in the rain yesterday.”

Meilin made a noise comparable to that of a horse sneezing. “He took you horse riding?”

“Yeah...”

“So what happened that you aren’t telling me about? I mean, he’s not going to be mean one night, then spontaneously invite you horse riding the next day.”

“Well, yeah, that was pretty much how it was...”

“Quite hiding things Kinomoto. How am I supposed to help you if you won’t give me the full story?”

Sakura sighed and looked out the window. “I just... we talked the night before and he freaked out. I think he felt bad about it the next day and wanted to make up for it.”

“What kind of freak out? I mean, he isn’t inclined to feel guilty. It must have been something....”

“No, just your average freak out,” Sakura said, laughing weakly. “Anyways, we went riding. We took the horses swimming. That was fun...”

Meilin shook her head, turning onto a busy city road. “Unbelievable....”

“Then we went to some dinner at Tyung’s house. Found out she was engaged. Syaoran and her got in a fight about something or another.... but I think I finally figured it out Meilin. All of this, how he’s acting around me, it’s because he’s scared.”

Meilin was quiet for a second before exploding out with, “Duh!” Sakura tried not to be taken aback. Meilin continued. “I told you that, Kinomoto. He doesn’t want to get hurt again, of couse he’s scared of you. Terrified, probably.”

Sakura sighed. “Well... at least I’m making some ground.”

“Yeah, yeah, so what did you do after that?”

“Um... he came back and seemed pretty upset. He got a mission from the Elder’s, then he went out and didn’t come home until after one in the morning.”

“Hmm...” Meilin said disapprovingly. Sakura looked at her in question. She didn’t elaborate. Meilin parked in a good space in the mall parking lot, then got out. Sakura got out of the car after her. The heat hit them again.

“This heat is disgusting. I don’t know how you stand it.”

Meilin shrugged. “Swimming.”

Sakura sighed. “That sounds nice. You know, I haven’t been to the beach once yet this summer.”

Meilin’s eyes lit up. “That’s what we’ll do tomorrow! We’ll all go to the beach!”

Sakura bit her lip. “I don’t know... I think it’d be better in a more personal setting so I can actually talk to him...”

Meilin shook her head. “Nonsense. A romantic sunset at the beach, a couple of us around to make sure it’s not awkward, a good bikini.... it could work.”

Sakura laughed weakly. “Well, wonderful, but I didn’t even bring a bathing suit. And I’m not wearing one of yours.”

Meilin shook her head. “I wonder about you sometimes, Kinomoto.”

Sakura frowned. “What?”

“Duh,” She repeated, pointing at the mall. Sakura smiled weakly.

“Right...”

They walked the rest of the way to the mall silently, both deep in thought. Sakura sighed to herself. Beach... not a beach. I have one day left to use with him, I need it to be good. “What happens if Syaoran’s busy tomorrow?”

“Oh, he won’t be busy. Tomorrow’s the last day you’re here, right?”

Sakura nodded, wondering what significance that held.

Meilin just nodded, as if it explained itself.

Sakura shook her head and continued into the wonderful blasts of cold air in the entry way. She stepped into the large echoing hall. “I think he went out with that girl,” Sakura said to Meilin.

Meilin frowned. “What?”

Sakura felt like blurting out ‘duh’. She refrained. “Last night. He was out so long. I think he went out with her.”

Meilin sighed. “Sakura, you can’t let that get to you. You’re saving him, remember? That requires overlooking some minor faults.”

“You call that a minor fault?” Sakura asked, her voice slighty raised in irritation. She took a deep breath. “I mean, it’s just kind of hard to deal with.... you know?”

Meilin nodded sympathetically. “It must be...”

They veered into a nearby store. A full wall was lined with bikinis. Sakura cringed and scanned for anything more conservative.

“Are you saying you’re giving up?” Meilin asked, not hiding her disapproval.

“No, no. It’s just a bit frustrating. No.... Though I really doubt I’ll be able to get him to come along with me....”

Meilin made another horse sneeze noise. “So that’s really all it is for you, huh Kinomoto? Cards, cards, cards?”

Sakura sighed with frustration. “No! But I have to leave, and I’m not going to do much good telling him how I feel if I’m off to England and he’s here.”

Meilin resigned. “I suppose...”

Sakura found a pair of short looking bottoms. She claimed them immediately, then searched for a good top to match them with. There was a tankini looking one sitting all by itself. She grabbed it, then looked to Meilin for approval.

“Are the tying ones so bad?” She finally asked.

“Yes. They are.”

Meilin sighed, then shrugged. “Whatever. Syaoran seems to like the weird things about you, so...” She headed towards the cashier, tearing the things out of Sakura’s hands. Sakura followed her. Meilin paid for the stuff quickly, then headed out of the store, bag in hand. Sakura followed her out into the main hall. A group of teenagers passed by, taking up the whole hall. Meilin took the time to glare at them, then headed to another store. “Well, we have until tomorrow to get you ready. That’s your last day, you get it? No playing games. You’ve got to spit it out there. You better not disappoint me.”

Sakura smiled weakly. She had the strangest feeling she would.

________________________________________________________________________

Syaoran yawned and prepared himself to go inside. It wasn’t very late. He was sure most of his sisters would be awake, and positive Sakura would be sitting around somewhere, waiting for him. He didn’t want to answer any questions. He felt horrible. He was almost positive one of his shots had taken out a middle aged man. That man might have had children. His children may have been five or six. They would feel the effects of Syaoran’s decision for years to come. He had justified it all in his head, of course. There hadn’t been an alternative, if Syaoran wanted to continue living. The man should have chosen a better profession if he valued his family.

But Syaoran couldn’t get around it. He glumly opened the door. He could see two figures watching TV. He didn’t bother to look at them. He didn’t bother to notice Sakura turning around expectantly, her eyes following him to the stairs. He just continued to his room. His room was dark and empty. He liked it that way. He shut the door behind him, not turning on the lights. He walked to his bed, collapsing. His mind began rushing ahead.

Maybe he’s alright. I didn’t see him die... The thought of children standing at the man’s grave continued through his mind. He couldn’t escape from it. He was disgusted with himself. He couldn’t get away. Any cowardly act of escape would just further his hate against himself. He sighed, staring at the ceiling with wide, alert eyes.

He had finished what the Elders had asked him to do. He should be happy. But he didn’t want it. He didn’t want to live like he was. But there was no other way. He was keeping everyone happy. His own existence was a pointless rambling. He was there for others’ use. Or he was too much of a coward to stand up to the Elders. I did it. And it was the dumbest thing I’ve ever done. Destroying it all to go over to Japan for some girl... He sighed. That girl was downstairs. He almost felt a twinge of admiration for himself. It had been such a brave move. But a foolish and wreckless one at that. He had hurt more than he ever thought possible. And yet, for such a breif moment, he had been happier than he could ever remember being. It was too good to be true. I was a fool for thinking it was obtainable.

A loud knock on his door brought him back to reality. He glanced towards his door, not bothering to get up. He waited for it to go away. It knocked again. He sighed loudly. “What?” He asked, sounding as irritated as possible.

Sakura peered through the door, slowly letting herself in. She shut the door behind her quietly, then remained in the doorway. If she was intimidated by the absence of light or being alone in his room with him, she showed no signs. Syaoran continued to watch her from his sprawled out position. “What?” He repeated.

“What’s wrong?” Sakura asked, seeming genuinely concerned.

Syaoran shook his head, then forced himself to sit up. “Nothing.”

“Sometimes... you’re a pathetic liar,” Sakura said, smiling.

Syaoran had to admit, she was brave. He figured she was too terrified to ever be so alone with him again. “Sometimes.... you’re irritating.”

Sakura didn’t let it deter her. “Thanks,” she said dryly. “Well, was your mission really bad or something? You were gone a long time.”

“Mm....” Syaoran responded, leaning on his knees. He glanced at the clock. It was late.

“Mm. Quite a story.” Sakura took a few daring steps closer, then leaned against the wall. “I leave the morning after tomorrow,” She announced.

“Mm...” Syaoran responded, not revealing it meant anything to him.

“Have you made any decisions?”

“Mm....”

Sakura let out an annoyed sigh. “I’m glad to see you care...”

Syaoran found this statement slightly odd. He felt like exploding at her, yelling at her, reminding her what exactly he had put himself through just to tell her how he felt. It seemed Sakura’s memory was quite selective. “Likewise.”

Sakura frowned at him, curious. He was just looking off, oblivious, impossible to read. “Well... I was just wondering, if you wanted to go to the beach tomorrow. Meilin set it all up, so I don’t know who she invited, but I think she called some of your friends...”

Syaoran looked up breifly to glare at her. “I don’t have any friends.”

“Well... Some of your followers, I guess.”

Syaoran seemed to find this a more adequate description. He looked back to the floor.

“Anyways, would you go?”

Syaoran shook his head wordlessly.

Sakura sighed, watching the sillhouette of his head shake. “Please? I really would like to see you, if I’m going to have to leave by myself.”

Syaoran looked up, questioning her with his eyes.

“Don’t act so surprised.”

Syaoran glared. “Do you have any idea what you want, Kinomoto?”

Sakura frowned. “What?”

“Your behavior is so random and unpredictable, it gives me the impression you want the whole world.”

Sakura glanced over at the other wall, utterly confused. Her behavior? Unpredictable? “Well... that’s the first time I’ve heard that before.”

Syaoran made a disgusted sigh. Sakura glared at him.

“Listen. I do know what I want. I want you to go to the beach with us tomorrow. Then I want you to go with me and Chindra to England to finish Eriol off.”

“And then...?” Syaoran dared to ask. He watched her carefully.

“And then....we’ll see.”

Syaoran shook his head.

“So, will you go?”

“Mm...” Syaoran said, even more passive.

Sakura sighed, frustrated. She thought back quickly to an old tactic of Syaoran’s. She had been so upset for him, when he had freaked out when she was reading that old book of his. She hid in her room. He had stood at the doorway, informing her he wouldn’t leave until she forgave him. “I’m not going to leave till you promise you’ll go.”

Syaoran glanced over at her. She stood leaning against the wall, her arms crossed. He could make out a determined and challenging glare on her face through the shadows. He shrugged carelessly. “Alright. Goodnight.” Syaoran yawned, laid back down and rolled on his side, fixed the blankets, then became still.

Sakura sighed leaning against the wall. She had said what she was going to do. She wasn’t going to leave till it was carried out. She stood, waiting for him to turn over any second. He didn’t. Minutes began passing. Her legs began to ache. She finally gave in and sat down against the wall, legs crossed. He stirred, then became still again. Sakura sighed loudly, then leaned her head back on the wall. He could be so stubborn sometimes. That was perfectly fine. She would be just as stubborn back.

After a good chunk of time had passed by, Sakura found her eyelids beginning to droop. She thought through different things to say to try and provoke an answer out of him. Nothing good came to mind. She leaned over to see the clock by his bed. It was approaching midnight. She watched the lump of person on the bed in front of her. He didn’t move. She sighed and concocted a decent plan. She searched around her on the floor for something to throw. A Tshirt lay strewn across by the closet. She inched over silently and picked it up. She watched him carefully. He made no movement.

She bunched the Tshirt into a ball and threw it carefully at him, aiming for his head. It landed perfectly. She laughed silently to herself for a moment, then watched for a reaction.

Syaoran opened his eyes, something smothering his breathing. He had just been on the verge of sleep. Sakura just had no idea how hard it was for him to fall asleep. He felt a surge of anger against her. It passed quickly. He pulled the shirt off his head, dropped it to the ground, and lay still for a second. He let out a long breath and sat up groggily. “I don’t want to go,” He mumbled, his eyes half shut.

Sakura could have laughed at his appearance. She reminded herself not to. “Why? What else would you do?”

“Work, make money, be a responsible person...”

Sakura shook her head. “You’re too young for that.”

“I was always too young...” His sentence drifted into a yawn. He rubbed his eyes, then looked at her, more awake. “You said you didn’t trust me.”

“What?” Sakura asked, feeling slightly nervous at his mention of that.

“After the other night. You said you didn’t trust me.”

“Oh...” Sakura chewed on her lip, looking for a way to explain herself. “Well, I don’t....” She said, trying to keep her dignity.

Syaoran sighed. “If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be sitting on the floor by my bed near midnight with the lights off and the door shut.”

Sakura hated how he was phrasing it. It was making her start to think there was something to be nervous about. She held her ground. “Well um, I guess I sort of understand... so I don’t exactly... not trust you.”

“Mm....” Syaoran yawned once more, then leaned his head back against the wall behind his bed. He shut his eyes for a second, then looked to Sakura. “I want to sleep. I’d appreciate it if you left me alone.”

Sakura glared. “The deal was, I wouldn’t until you promised to the beach tomorrow.”

Syaoran let out a long sigh, then got to his feet. He walked towards the door. Sakura jumped to her feet to block his way. “What are you doing?”

“Sleeping somewhere else...”

Sakura put herself in front of his door, shaking her head. “If you’d just say you’ll go, I’ll leave.”

Syaoran shrugged. “Sleeping in my own bed isn’t that important...” He attempted to get around her without touching her. She was blocking the door too well. He sighed and stepped back, waiting for her to say more.

“Syaoran....” Sakura couldn’t think of what she wanted to stay. It was still too early to say anything deep. “Do you not want to see me that much?”

Syaoran let out an annoyed sigh. “Damn it, you’re persistent! Are you really that dense?” He rolled his eyes at the hurt expression on her face. “Of course, go on and make me feel guilty about it. Like I don’t have enough shit bothering me...”

Sakura bit her lip. This was one of those times she would like to attack him with a hug and make him feel better, holding him till her cried. Somehow she doubted he ever cried. Somehow she doubted it would work in their current situation. “No, you’re right.... I deserve every bit of it...” Sakura replied quietly.

Syaoran sighed at her soft attitude. He refused to sympathize. “Listen, you’re not going to get to me, alright? Just get that through your head.”

“But why-”

“Listen, just leave me alone and I’ll go by the beach tomorrow. Okay? Happy?”

Sakura felt like she hadn’t acheived anything. She looked into his eyes for anything. There was some fear. It was almost familiar. But he was still in control. He wanted her to leave before he lost it. She decided it might be the safer decision. She nodded slowly. “T....thanks.”

Syaoran just sighed, opened the door around her, and waited for her to leave. Sakrua slowly sulked her way out of the room. Syaoran closed it abruptly behind her. She turned and looked at the door for a while, feeling her eyes watering. She let out a long breath. Getting through to him was really tough. She stumbled her way back to her room, her sleepiness taking over. She was thankful for that small token of fortune. She shut the guest room door behind her quietly and walked to her bed, collapsing. She had a long day ahead of her tomorrow.

_____________________________________________________________________

Sakura woke to find Syaoran gone. She was completely frustrated with him. She continued with her beach plans regardless. She had called Meilin and arranged to be picked up in a half an hour, about ten minutes ago. She sat at the counter of the empty kitchen and stared at the clock. It was almost noon. Syaoran had been gone since at least ten. She pulled at the strap of her new bathing suit under her new tank top. The outfit looked great. The bathing suit was nice and not too open. She had gotten a pair of sun glasses to complete the entourage. She looked cool. Cooler than she had in a long time. She doubted Syaoran would take any of it into account. He would go on being impenetrable.

She looked hopefully to the door after hearing some sound. The knob turned, the door opened, and a figure stepped through, shopping bags in hand. Daikal smiled, breathlessly kicking the door behind her. “Hello...” She managed. Sakura rushed up, taking some of the bags from her hands.

“Thanks... I hate making second trips,” Daikal explained.

Sakura shook her head. “No problem. Where do you want them?”

“Oh.... just dump them in the living room.”

Sakura followed the instructions and then returned to her counter post. She twisted around on the chair in boredom. “You wouldn’t happen to know where Syaoran ran off to this morning, would you?”

“Oh... ah... He was gone when I left... I think he had training or something...”

Sakura frowned. “It’s lasted quite a while, it’s almost-” Sakura stopped her sentence as she heard the front door opening again. She looked towards it expectantly. Lai came through, holding more bags. She sighed. “It’s almost noon.” She finished.

“I know, crazy....” Daikal seemed sidetracked for a moment. She turned to Lai. “Do you have any idea where Syaoran is?”

“Still training, I suppose. Sensei Wanti’s.... something else.”

Sakura sighed. Syaoran would easily use this as an excuse to get out of going to the beach. She leaned against the counter, then looked at the clock. They would be leaving in ten minutes. She walked over to the fridge and got out some lemonaide. Lai was putting a cd into the cd player. She started up some rock band with a girl singer. Sakura liked it.

Sakura liked it so much that she failed to notice Syaoran entering the house until he had walked right past her to the stairs. He was a sweaty, tired mess. She wasted no time in following after him.

“Relax,” He muttered, continuing to his room.

“You look terrible...” Sakura commented, catching up to him.

“Thanks...” Syaoran headed into his room, looking for some clean clothes to change into after a shower. He noticed Sakura still following him. “Can I help you?”

Sakura smiled. “You could go to the beach....”

Syaoran rolled his eyes, then continued towards the bathroom. “In a little while...”

Sakura held in a yelp for joy. “So you are going!”

“Mm...” Syaoran responded.

“Meilin’s picking me up in twenty minutes, if you could get ready in time!”

Syaoran tossed his clothes into the bathroom, then turned in the doorway. “No. Go ahead, I”ll catch up later.”

Sakura fell a little at this, but was overall content with his decision. “Awesome.”

Syaoran made no response to her enthusiasm and continued silently into the bathroom. Sakura huried down the stairs, glancing at her watch. Meilin would be there in five minutes. She rushed to the door, deciding to wait outside. Maybe she was getting through to him. She thought of the whole trip that was behind her. She had managed to communicate to him on a nonmagical basis. His theory she was using him for just the Cards was a false one. They did too have a relationship outside of magic. Magic just helped speed things along...

Sakura stood out on the driveway, shifting under the hot sun. She hoped Meilin would have thought to bring some sunblock, for she certainly hadn’t thought of it. She paced up and down the driveway, stopping as cars drove by. Meilin’s silver car finally came into view. Sakura jittered nervously. She hopped in silently, her leg shaking as it did when she was excited about something. Meilin observed this behavior and began making conclusions.

“So he’s coming, then?”

“Hmm? Oh, yes...” Sakura replied offhand, thinking through all the different things she had to tell him before the day’s demise. It was alot of emotion filled conversation for one day. She almost dreaded it.

“You know.... there’s no need to be so nervous...” Meilin muttered, turning onto a main highway as signs directed.

“Yes.... I do know. It’s just...there’s good reason to be nervous... I mean, this is it. I’ve got today to tell him whatever I need to tell him to go with me.”

“I can think of three good words of choice...”

Sakura glanced at Meilin, then looked back out at the passing landscape. “I just don’t have very much time and I hate rushing things...” She continued.

Meilin only sighed and tossed her long black pony tail off her shoulder.

They continued driving silently. Sakura finally found something good to inquire on. “So who did you invite?”

“Oh.... the usual. I invited Alexis and Teller of course. Ironic, because they won’t get along with any of the others. Jin, Yundi, and Ryoto, just because they worship Syaoran and should make him feel a little more secure. Some personal friends of mine... not too many.”

“You invited alot!” Sakura blurted out. “I mean... how am I supposed to talk to him with fifty zillion people running around with their shirts off?”

“Oh, Kinomoto, you exagerate so much...”

“No, I mean, really. I’m going to have to pretend to drown just so Syaoran can save me and have a few seconds to ourselves...”

“You know, that’s not a bad idea...” Meilin said, frowning in thought.

“No! I’m not going to do it. That’s pathetic. Besides, it wouldn’t work anyway.”

Meilin let out another loud sigh, turning onto an exit. They were soon travelling along the coast. Many of the beaches were packed full. They passed them, continuing to more isolated spots. They found an area that wasn’t too crowded and parked, then got out. Meilin walked to the trunk and grabbed some chairs. Sakura helped with the coolers. They trudged their way down to the sand. Sakura took a deep breath of the salt water air. It felt wonderful in her lungs. She let it out slowly, placing the coolers down where Meilin directed.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been to the beach,” Meilin commented, looking on at the waving water.

Sakura nodded. “It’s so pretty, nothing can subsitute it.”

Meilin nodded in agreement, then tore off her clothing to her bikini. She sat down in the chair, shutting her eyes for a second. “Nothing beats tanning by the ocean, either.”

Sakura smiled weakly, then sat down in the chair beside her, leaving her clothes on. She looked down the beach. Many teenagers were laying out in their skimpy bathing suits, tanning away. She looked back to Meilin. She suddenly doubted she had brought any sunblock along. Sakura sighed. She would just have to deal with the sunburns she got on behalf of saving Syaoran.

They sat quietly for a while, enjoying the sounds of the beach. Sakura walked down to the water to test the temperature. It was perfect for swimming. She headed back to the chairs and found Alexis and Teller were setting up camp. They both sported bathing suits. Sakura winced as Teller noticed her and waved dramatically. She offered a small wave, then sat down in her chair.

“I didn’t think to bring Benny along...” Teller mentioned, walking around to address Sakura.

Meilin opened her eyes to glare at Teller. “You’re blocking my sun.”

Teller frowned, confused, then jumped out of the way. Meilin returned to a blissful tanning session. Alexis sat down wordlessly and joined her. Sakura watched them for an awkward moment, then looked back to the tall boy addressing her. “Well.... that’s a shame... he was quite a hamster...”

Teller nodded, smiling. “Yes....yes he was....” He glanced at his sister, shifting uncomfortably. Sakura could see a slight resemblance to the short boy she had known earlier. She smiled. He had been so harmless then.

“So are you gals swimming?” Teller asked, addressing Meilin and Alexis.

“Oh...maybe in a bit....” Replied Alexis. She stood up from her chair and grabbed a towel, spread it across the sand, then laid down. Meilin apparently found this an effective strategy and did the same.

Teller smiled weakly at Sakura. “Would you like to swim?”

Sakura looked around for someone else to help. No one. There was no harm in swimming. She shrugged, standing up. “Why not....” She agreed. She felt slightly awkward taking her clothes off in front of him. There wasn’t an alternative. Luckily he got the hint, and was heading towards the water without her. Sakura quickly took off the tank top and shorts and rushed after him. She ran past him into the water, diving in and making a big splash. It felt wonderful. She paddled around in the salt water for a moment, then searched for Teller. He had jumped in after her. They swam a good distance apart, heading further out. The water was fairly clear. Sakura looked below her feet at the pure sand. She watched a crab scurry under her. She instictively kept her feet closer to the surface.

“Ugh...” Teller muttered, watching the same crab pass under him. He looked up, realizing he needed to explain himself. “I, um.... I stepped on a crab once. Hurt like bloody hell....”

Sakura smiled in sympathy. “I was never a big fan of sealife...” She looked back down into the water, watching the crab go. “They are kind of neat to watch, if they aren’t bothering you.”

“Yeah, yeah...” Teller agreed, looking down as well.

Sakura looked towards the beach. They were further out than she had thought. “Tide must be going out...”

Teller looked up and nodded. “Yeah.”

Sakura went underwater, carefully opening her eyes as she swam along. The water was so freeing. She felt ready to tell Syaoran anything. She surfaced, looking around for Teller. He surfaced beside her a few seconds later.

“You’re a fast swimmer,” He commented.

Sakura blushed. “No, not very...”

“Race me back to the beach?”

Sakura bit her lower lip, considering this. It seemed like a harmless plan. “Alright,” she agreed. “On three?”

Teller nodded.

“One...two...three!” Sakura dove under, churning up the water like she had a shark on her tail. She swam and swam on the one lungful of air until her stomach was scraping the bottom and her lungs felt like they were collapsing. She finally came up, gasping for breath. She put her knees down in the sand, not wanting to stand up. The air seemed to cold. She smiled as she watched Teller finally make his way up. He came up, panting like he had run ten miles.

“You’re way too fast...” He said between breaths.

Sakura grinned and shook her head. Something on the beach caught her eyes. It seemed the rest of the possee arrived. There was now an intimidatingly large group of people collected around where Meilin and Alexis had been stationed. And there, sitting like he wasn’t alive in a far chair, was Syaoran. Sakura smiled and stood up out of the water, making sure she was presentable. She jogged out, leaving Teller behind. He seemed to get a hint.

Sakura headed straight for her towel, feeling way too vulnerable. Once she had it wrapped about her, she approached Syaoran. He finally looked up at her after a while.

“Hi...” She said, smiling and breathless.

“Hi,” Syaoran responded in a much more reserved tone.

“Kinomoto-san,” said one of the boys from Meilin’s direction. She turned to see Yundi waving at her. She waved weakly back.

“You want to tan with us?” He called.

Sakura shook her head, a forced smile on her face. “No thanks.”

He shrugged and returned to talking with Meilin and Alexis. Apparently they had gotten past their differences to sit around in bathing suits. Sakura frowned. They had all stripped down. She looked back to Syaoran. He seemed to have no intention of following them.

“Well... thanks. For coming.”

Syaoran didn’t respond. He was looking towards the ocean, entranced.

“You want to go swimming?” Sakura asked, sitting herself down on her towel. It was difficult to keep covered while using it as a seat.

“I dunno...” Syaoran finally said. He looked out towards Teller, then back at Sakura.

Sakura felt like she was supposed to be keeping the conversation going. The problem was, Syaoran was going to shoot down every idea she had. She came up with something brilliant. “You want something to drink?”

“What did you bring?”

“Um...soda and water.”

“Water, then...”

Sakura nodded, then headed over to the cooler. She grabbed two waters, ignoring the watchful eyes from the tanning squad next to her. She walked back to Syaoran, taking her chair with her. She sat down, successfully wrapped in a towel. She handed him the water. He muttered thanks in a barely audible tone.

Sakura opened her water and took a long drink, then shifted uncomfortably. She had been right. This was way too awkward to talk to him amongst all these people. “So... Teller and I were racing. You should join in, I’m sure you’d win.”

Syaoran was quiet for a while, then finally shrugged. “I guess so.”

Sakura sighed. “This wasn’t my goal. I didn’t want you to come here all irritable because I made you.”

Syaoran tried to hide a grin. “I guess you should have specified the conditions.”

Sakura let out an annoyed sigh, then frowned at his expression. He wasn’t being serious. She laughed for a moment. “Fine, sorry.” She sighed and snuggled into her towel, feeling the sun frying her skin. “I don’t know how they can just lay out like that....”

Syaoran shook his head. “You’d be amazed what people do for beauty...”

“But I mean... why’s tanned skin so great? It’s just a bunch of dead skin that gets all spotted when you’re older and gives you skin cancer. Why can’t white skin be popular?”

Syaoran almost smiled at her speech. “You can start campaigning.”

Sakura rolled her eyes. “Well... I’m not exactly light. Besides, I didn’t bring any sunblock, and I’ll end up looking like the rest of them after today...”

Syaoran shrugged. She looked over and glared at him. “But you’re not exactly one to talk, you must have the best tan of them all.”

Syaoran glanced at his arm then shook his head. “It’s not from laying out.”

“All your missions, right?”

Syaoran shrugged. Sakura sighed.

She took another long drink of water. It was hard to stay hydrated on such a hot day. “Well you should go swimming with us.”

Syaoran sighed. “Mm.”

Sakura glared. “Don’t start that again.”

Syaoran watched her uncertainly. She finally got up, setting her bottle of water on her chair. “Well I’m going to swim. I’d be happy if you’d join me.”

Sakura contemplated leaving her towel on her chair as any normal person would do. She decided to take it with her close to shore so she wouldn’t have to walk so far exposed. She dropped the towel once she was a good distance away from him and ran into the water with little to no amount of grace. Teller swam over immediately.

“Is Syaoran-san going to swim?”

Sakura shrugged, then turned to look at him. He was still sitting high and mighty in his chair. “Who knows.” She looked out into the horizon. “Let’s go look at more stuff.”

Teller nodded in agreement. Sakura went underwater, travelling at her newfound speed. She slowed as she reached a line where plant life began and looked down. There were tons of different sea animals trafficking across the bottom. Teller caught up and looked down in amazement.

“It’s so pretty and disgusting all at the same time...” He commented, tredding the water over the forest.

Sakura smiled and nodded. “I know what you mean.” She turned to look over her shoulder. She didn’t see Syaoran in his chair. She frowned and scanned the coastline. He wasn’t anywhere in sight. She sighed and looked back to the animals.

“Ew, look at that one!” Teller exclaimed, pointing under the water at a particularly large crab. Sakura’s eyes widened.

“That’s disgusting!”

Teller nodded in agreement.

They watched the crab make its way through the plankton and sea weed. It’s pincers opened and closed rhythmically. Sakura shuddered. “I couldn’t imagine stepping on one of those.”

“It hurts,” he agreed. Sakura frowned. That hadn’t been Teller’s voice. She glanced at him with confusion, then jumped sideways in the water as she noticed Syaoran on her left.

She let out a long breath, heart beat returning to normal. “You scared me!” She exclaimed, eyes shining brightly. She shook her head and looked back towards the gigantic crab. “Look at that thing!”

Syaoran swam up a little, looking into the water. It was an enormous and grotesque creature. “Weird,” He decided, watching the crab disappear into the underwater forest. He watched a few more make their way around, then took a second to glance at Sakura. He knew he was screwing himself over, going after her like this. He was asking for her to shoot him in the head. But he couldn’t help himself. He at least deserved some happiness, right? He could go back to hating her once she left, and everything would return to normality. She was too beautiful to keep away from.

Sakura was, of course, oblivious to any impact of her presence, and proceeded in doing a few summersaults in the water. She laughed as she surfaced, sneezing at the same time. “I always get water up my nose...”

Syaoran wanted to laugh. He wanted to pull her in and hug her and not let go. These thoughts were getting dangerous. He looked towards some nearby swimming girls who had been watching him since he had taken his shirt off. He sighed and looked back to Sakura, torn. He needed to keep himself under a constant evaluation. There was no harm in getting a little close. Too close, there was certainly harm.

“You didn’t bring any goggles with you, did you, Li-san?”

Syaoran looked over to Teller. The boy was acting young again. That was good. Sakura seemed to have that effect on people. “No, sorry.”

Teller shrugged. “Oh well...”

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Alexis yawned lazily, enjoying the warming sun on her skin. She glanced at her stomach. It was already pink. She would be paying for this later. Yundi and Ryoto were drooling over other girls in string bikinis. She rolled her eyes. Boys would never change. Meilin looked sound asleep laying out next to her. Her stomach was a healthy shade of pink as well. Alexis grinned to herself. That was going to hurt more than her own. She looked out to watch her brother swim around. He was out pretty far with Sakura, looking at something in the water. The two seemed to get along well. It was a pity Sakura was so absorbed in Syaoran. Syaoran who wouldn’t get out of his chair to just say hello to any of them. Syaoran who insisted on ignoring all of his higher intelligence and brain function. She shook her head. That boy was a lost cause.

She surveyed the beach, looking at all the other teenagers. Not many met her taste. They all looked the same, anyways. Too scrawny or too built. Her eyes slowed as she came across a rare specimen. He hurried into the water with purpose. He looked around her age with the perfect, ideal build. She admired it for a second, completely enthralled. She would have to talk to him once he came out of the water. Her eyes widened. She whacked Meilin on the arm. “Meilin!”

Meilin squinted her eyes open. “What?” She asked, annoyed.

“Is that your cousin getting into the water?” Alexis asked, eyes locked on him.

Meilin sat up quickly. She looked to Syaoran’s empty chair, then towards the object of Alexis’ gaze. She blinked. “S-Syaoran.... swimming....” The very thought seemed foreign. He never did anything fun or exciting like that, let alone take his shirt off in public. He claimed he was being ‘modest’. It baffled Meilin. They all knew very well he could attract half the beach if he wanted to. And yet, there he was, jumping into the water. She looked further out ahead of him. Sakura and Teller were swimming in place.

“That girl!” Meilin announced in disbelief. She turned to Alexis. “I swear, if I didn’t know better, I’d think she had found some kind of a love spell to put him under. He took her horse riding yesterday. Invited her, no less! They took the horses swimming. My cousin....” She gesticulated wildly towards the shore, trying to further her point.

Alexis shook her head, amazed as well. “That’s quite impressive. I didn’t think there was any hope.”

Meilin shook her head, baffled. “I was beginnning to doubt.... Kinomoto’s got to be the most dumbly lucky person in the world.”

Alexis nodded in agreement. They watched Syaoran disappear underwater, then popup around Sakura. She jumped sideways in surprise, then eased into a conversation. Meilin shook her head, glaring. She couldn’t believe it as she saw it. It was just too easy for Sakura. There was no way she was going to get around so many years of hurt and depression so easily.

Meilin watched them swim around for a while, not wanting to miss any of the miracle-in-progress. They must have swam for a good fifteen minutes before finally heading back to shore. She watched them all get out of the water. Sakura and Syaoran were carrying a conversation without so much of a glance at each other’s bodies. “Incredible...” Meilin murmurred. Syaoran was a professional at using girls for their looks, and here he didn’t even seem to notice there was anything below Sakura’s head. She shook her head, almost disgusted. “I can’t believe something so perfect could be handed over to someone so ungrateful.... those two will always perplex me.”

Alexis had laid back down. She squinted one eye open. “It’s rubbish. Give it a few days and Syaoran’ll be back to all the stupid stuff again.”

Meilin shook her head, unconvinced.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Sakura shivered as a breeze blew across. She pulled her towel more tightly around her, then kept her eyes on the beach. Teller was sitting with her and Syaoran now, and the awkward barometer was at a comfortable low. She grabbed her water and took a long drink, then set it back in its cup holder.

“It had been so long since I’ve swam in the ocean,” Sakura said, glancing at Syaoran. He seemed lost in thought. He came out of it just to nod.

“Me too,” Teller responded, tracing English words in the sand. Sakura watched his artwork for a while, then looked back towards the water.

“Oh no....trouble....” Teller mumbled, looking over his shoulder. Sakura and Syaoran both frowned and looked to see what he was looking at.

Sakura flushed with irritation and anger. That girl was coming over the hill with one of her dumb friends. Their outfits barely covered the bikinis underneath. Sakura turned back around, trying her best not to look jealous.

Syaoran spotted Mandu in one horrific second. He contemplated running straight into the water, but he knew she would be waiting for him. He couldn’t hide all day. He pulled at his wet Tshirt, trying to get it off his skin. This was going to be very awkward any moment. Sakura was pretending to act uninterested. Syaoran glanced back. Mandu was upset, he could tell. Syaoran was sure it must have something to do with him and how he had avoided her for three days without any explanation. He let out a long sigh. He set himself up for this.

Sakura wanted to sit around and sulk. She would have liked to see how they could possibly get along. It just didn’t make any sense. She couldn’t see Syaoran ever tolerating such a stupid, superficial girl. She dug her big toe into the sand, then finally reached a decision. She glanced at Teller.

“You want to go out there again?”

Teller nodded quickly. “Yes, let’s....”

Sakura got to her feet and abandoned her towel on the spot, figuring Syaoran had other things to look at. She and Teller hurried to the water, trying to get away before Mandu arrived. They didn’t notice the desperate look Syaoran followed with his eyes.

Sakura sighed as she waded into the water. Teller seemed to be picking up on it.

“I always thought you two were together, or would be or something...” He commented, jumping in and dipping his head under before waiting for a response.

Sakura blushed, smiling weakly. “Well.... you know... things are complicated...”

Teller shook his head. “I’ve never seen him act around any other girl like he acts around you. It’s so completely different.”
Sakura glanced back. Mandu had split from her friend to have a personal chat with Syaoran. She seemed to be yelling at him or something. He was just sitting back in irritation, letting her run her course. Sakura tried to keep the images from bothering her. It didn’t work. “Oh...?”

Teller smiled sympathetically. “He doesn’t like her, if that’s what’s bothering you.”

Sakura frowned, trying to play dumb. She tredded the water out a little deeper. “Bothering me?”

Teller just shrugged and continued swimming out to their previous observation spot. The wildlife continued moving around. Sakura watched it in disgust. When Teller seemed to be busy, she snuck more glances towards them. From what she could figure, Mandu had been mad, yelled at him, Syaoran had gotten mad and totally crushed her. She couldn’t tell if it was a regular happening. She wondered what things Syaoran was saying. She looked back to the water, eyes downcast. This was some load of baggage to deal with.

“I used to like her, a long time ago. Syaoran told me I was too good for her after she turned me down a couple times.”

Sakura couldn’t help but smile. “Syaoran told you that?”

Teller nodded. He glanced back, then sighed. “I don’t know. She was pretty when I was younger, but it wasn’t worth it. I think Syaoran hated her more than any of the other girls in school. He told her it, too. Of course.... that was a while ago, but... I dunno what happened. I guess he was looking for something, and he decided to use her for it.”

Sakura smiled weakly. People were passing these things off so easily here. Her stomach flipped just thinking about. Virginity must just be one of those things you take for granted. She let out another long sigh, then swam underwater to get a closer look. A shrimp looking thing passed by her very close. She backed off and finally came up to surface.

Who knows if he’ll ever come back to who I thought he was. Maybe he really can’t change. Sakura thought to the few places she had seen glimpses of an old him. Not enough. He doesn’t want it to come back. But then again.... he doesn’t want to get hurt. This is some amazing act of fear, if that’s what it is....

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Syaoran felt his eyes starting to weigh down somewhere towards the middle of Mandu’s little speech.

“...And you undervalue me so much, I mean, do you any idea how many other guys you’re in competition with? And you just go run around with that little ugly Japan girl...”

Syaoran sighed and took a second to glance around her at Sakura and Teller. They were talking about something serious, swimming around in their previous spot. What he wouldn’t give to be out there. He glanced at Mandu. She continued on her perfectly planned speech. He didn’t know what to do, for once. Sometimes he would blow her off, as long as he knew she’d come crawling back. This time he thought she was pretty solid in her threats. He could easily say a few right things and have her waiting for him again. But there Sakura was, looming in his mind trying to influence all of his decisions.

He shouldn’t have came. He knew that much. He was letting himself way too close to her. He felt himself losing more and more of his front each minute she talked with him. But for the first time in the past two years he was starting to feel okay. The weight of the world wasn’t pushing down on him, if only giving him momentarily breaks. It was more than he ever asked for before.

“...and all I ask for is just some balanced...”

But danger was ahead of him and he had to face up to it. She wanted him to go help fight Eriol one last time. It was going to be an expensive trip in all aspects. He wasn’t sure he wanted to commit himself to something like that again. But he had screwed himself two years ago when he had promised himself to the task. He glanced at Mandu. He went back to his thoughts. He didn’t want to go. He couldn’t go, if he didn’t want to be hurt again. But, he wondered, what was the point of living on like he was? He was merely surviving. Perhaps he would die after she rejected him a second time. But at least there would be some true happiness beforehand. He sighed. He didn’t want to do it. All self preservance was kicking in, screaming at him to stay in Hong Kong.

He could tell Mandu was winding down. He had a more immediate problem. He watched her in distaste. She was so stupid. He should have picked a more intelligent girl to use. But, he didn’t want the higher maintenance involved. There are plenty of other girls to use. It’s not like I need her... Syaoran felt weight coming off his shoulders as her pondered seperating from the slut. It wouldn’t be so bad. He would be fine without her. What a freeing thought. He waited for her to finish.

“....serious changes if you want to stay with me.”

Syaoran watched her for a second before replying simply with, “I don’t.”

Mandu narrowed her brown eyes, pushing her black hair behind her ears. “What?”

“I don’t want to stay with you,” He reiterated, looking past her to Teller and Sakura as a vision of inspiration.

She let out a snort of disgust. “A week with that stupid girl and you just want to break up?”

“We were never going out,” Syaoran corrected.

Mandu kicked some sand around with her foot, looking utterly frustrated. It was the funniest thing Syaoran had seen in months. “You’re a complete bastard, Li-san, you know that? I’m glad we’re breaking up! There are tons of other guys who would treat me better than you ever did!”

Syaoran tried to keep from laughing. He nodded gravely. “Okay.”

Mandu glared at him for a while, waiting for some type of make up line. Syaoran just watched her in boredom. Her eyes started to glaze over. “Asshole,” She muttered, turning on her heels. She glanced back at him. “Yundi was better in bed than you ever were,” She spatted at him, then continued to the group of curious tanners.

Syaoran let out a long sigh, sinking into his chair. That’s because he cared. He glanced out at Sakura, feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt. He had been an idiot to ever involve himself with girls, anyways. How would he ever get to that subject with Sakura? She would probably want to leave for Japan the instant he mentioned anything about it. He bit hard on his bottom lip. Not my fault! She set me up for all of this! Somehow, he couldn’t rid himself of the bad feelings. Sakura and Teller were cautiously approaching the shore. Syaoran didn’t feel like being here anymore.

The chair he was sitting on was one of Meilin’s extras. He could just get up and leave. Sakura and Teller were almost out of the water now. He sighed, got to his feet, then headed up the hill to where he had parked his bike. A long ride home and then a good shower would be nice. After that, he’d have to find some other solitary activity where he could think. Maybe he would work on his training from the morning. That would be alright. He stepped out of the sand and onto the grass. He could hear fast footsteps behind him. He dreaded and hoped who it might be.

“Syaoran-kun!” Sakura called after him, sprinting up the sand while clinging to her towel. Syaoran felt like smiling at the sight. He refrained.

Sakura caught up to him and continued walking on the grass beside him. “Was it that girl?” She asked quietly, trying to sound concerned.

Syaoran felt horrible. Sakura was so good, she didn’t deserve any of it. “Yeah... sort of. I just don’t want to be here anymore.”

Sakura sighed, struggling to keep up with his long strided walk. “I’m sorry... if I’m causing that much trouble.”

Syaoran shook his head, reaching his bike. He turned to her. “Iie. You’re not. In fact...” He trailed off. Civil was going way too far. But did it matter? Maybe he would die in the end, but it would be wonderful beforehand. “In fact you sort of helped. I’ll see you at home later.”

Sakura’s expression fell. “Will you?”

“What?”

“Will you see me at home later? The other night, you were out so late...”

Syaoran shook his head. “I won’t do that again.”

Sakura sighed. She wanted to fess up. Maybe it was a good time. Maybe if she just told him, everything would be better. “Well I’m-”

“I’ll see you later, Sakura,” Syaoran cut her off, starting his bike before she had time to protest.

Sakura stepped back and watched him drive away. She let out a long breath, wondering what was going through his mind. Helped him? I wonder what he means by that.... Sakura turned and looked at the beach. It was a little after two thirty. She wondered what time Meilin planned on leaving.

She reluctantly headed down to the sand. Mandu and her friend and joined the tanning crowd. It looked like Meilin and Alexis had started their own faction away from them. Sakura didn’t feel like being near any of it. Teller was wondering the beach alone, looking bored. Sakura didn’t feel like being with him, either. She had the rest of the afternoon and evening to convince Syaoran to help her. She needed to use every last minute of it. But she could tell Syaoran was very wary of her. He would try to get out of it no matter what. Next time she she had him cornered alone, she would have to blurt it out really fast. Not give him time to get away.

She walked to her chair and plunked down. She sighed as she watched Teller make his way up from the water. She would have to get Meilin to leave early.

_______________________________________________________________________

Syaoran glanced at the long building the Elders held council in. He hated that building more than any other. He continued down to the barn, lingering on his mission the previous day. He tried to block out all the images, but they continued to haunt him. He stepped into the aisleway, waiting for his eyes to adjust. He wasn’t meant to take life. He walked to Iata’s stall and stopped. The older pony walked stiffly to the door, neighing in greeting. Syaoran hid a small smile, reaching his hand out for the animal to smell.

Iata nudged his hand around in search for food, then made a long horse sigh and leaned against the door. Syaoran leaned against it as well. Mother always wanted me to help Sakura. But she didn’t understand... Syaoran frowned, trying to shut out the pain he had hid from for the past two years. It continued pressing him. I don’t understand He admitted. Whenever it got down to why, it never made any sense. She had claimed ‘we’re not meant to be’. It was quite an elusive answer. He shut his eyes, putting all his effort into thinking about something else. It was far too dangerous to start bringing up old ghosts.

Syaoran grabbed a nearby brush and let himself into the stall. The pony continued chomping on its hay quietly. He had to make a decision, and make a decision soon. He looked at his watch. It was near five now. Sakura must have gotten home. She would be waiting around, ready to pummel him for answers. He would have to ask permission for leave from the Elders. He didn’t look forward to it. But he definitely didn’t look forward to Sakura leaving. She had made quite a bold step, just flying up with previous communication. It was something he never would have thought her capable of.

Iata pushed Syaoran with his nose. Syaoran had been brushing the same spot for the past five minutes deep in thought. He patted the pony’s fat neck in apology, then slipped out of the stall. He looked out at Raion’s pasture. The stallion was grazing quietly. Syaoran looked back towards his house. He couldn’t see much around the trees.

I promised her. He looked back towards the house of council, sighing. The Elder’s wouldn’t like it. That would just be their problem.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Sakura managed to salvage her beach clothes from getting wet, so she was able to wear them later on. They looked nice, if she did say so herself. Meilin had informed Sakura Mandu was quite upset with Syaoran because he had broken up with her. He had even had the nerve to say they weren’t going out in the first place. Sakura thought it was wonderful. She had searched through the house twice to see if he was home yet, then returned to the guest room, hopes deflated. It was going on six and she still hadn’t seen any signs of him.

Rana was the only one home currently, except for her new boyfriend. It had been extremely uncomfortable since he had arrived and Sakura was trying to avoid them at all costs. Unfortunately, all food was located downstairs in the open kitchen. They had chosen to snuggle up to a movie in the living room, visible from the kitchen. Sakura was stealthily opening the fridge, trying to keep from being spotted. She didn’t think Rana even knew she was there. That could present itself an awkward fact. The movie’s loud soundtrack was at a quiet spot. Sakura waited for it to get louder before throwing the lemonaide into the fridge and make for it up the stairs.

She glanced down the balcony towards the living room. It seemed Rana was oblivious to Sakura’s presence. They casually made out, missing the whole point of the movie. Sakura grimaced at the sight and continued hurrying down the hall. She shut the room to the guest door quietly, then relaxed on her bed with her drink.

She took a long sip, then turned and pulled the string to the ceiling fan above her. It started on quietly, giving the room a nice breeze. She smiled to herself, enjoying it. Her smile faded as she looked at the clock. It was five after six now. Sakura walked over to the window, hoping to see Syaoran somewhere. She didn’t. She walked back to her bed and sat down, looking for something to do. The trashy romance novel she had been halfway through laid on the floor. She let out a long breath. She wasn’t in the mood to read it. I could just go downstairs and watch Rana if I wanted that. She bit on her lip, thoughts drifting to Syaoran. Jealousy began boiling up. She did her best to surpress it, trying to think further ahead.

She hadn’t talked to Tomoyo or Chindra in a while. It would be a good idea to call them. But... she didn’t want to tell them she still wasn’t sure if he was coming or not. She could barely make a good prediction on the thought. He was so unpredictable, so unreadable... She gave in and pulled out her cell phone, then dialed Tomoyo’s number.

“Sakura!” Tomoyo exclaimed, having seen the call number on her phone.

Sakura smiled, glad to hear someone happy about hearing from her. “Hey, how are things?”

“Oh... not bad. Last night, Chindra sealed the Big and the Small all in one fight. She’s tough.”

“Wow.... did they make any bugs become huge, by chance?”

“No... No bugs...” Tomoyo said, utterly confused.

“Well, that’s good. They were horrible....”

“So what about you there? What have you done this week so far?”

Sakura smiled, thinking over her trip. “I went shopping with Meilin several times... I think I told you about almost wrecking Syaoran’s car... but um.... yesterday we went horseriding and took the horses swimming. It was wild, Tomoyo-chan. Then uh... went to one of Syaoran’s sister’s apartments for a dinner, she announced she was engaged....Today we went to the beach!”

“Has anything... well....happened?”

Sakura let out a long sigh. “No. It’s so frustrating. I don’t know what to think, after seeing everything here...”

“I see...” Tomoyo said, trying to sound sympathetic. “Well, has he said if he’s coming or not?”

“Well um... not exactly... but I’m hoping he will.”

“Yes well, we were all hoping that. I’m sure you can do it, Sakura-chan. That boy’s pretty powerless around you.”

Sakura smiled grimly. “Oh..ha, I don’t know...”

“What are you thinking?”

“Oh... I don’t know. I really just.... have no idea. I’m totally confused. Everything’s so different than what I expected...”

“Isn’t that always the way?” Tomoyo laughed, trying to lighten up the dark mood Sakura was settling into.

“I guess... But I mean... how am I supposed to... I dunno. I guess I’ll just wait and see, but it’s really frustrating with all these time limits. If I knew I had more time, this would all be a lot easier.”

“Well don’t fret it, Sakura-chan. I can feel it in my bones that he’ll be coming along. I’m sure you’ll have more time on the trip and after all of the cards are settled to figure those things out.”

“Yeah...” Sakura agreed, though she wasn’t so sure.

There was some silence, then Tomoyo finally broke in. “Well, Chindra’s here, she wishes you the best of luck.”

Sakura smiled. “Thanks guys... Sorry I didn’t call with any exciting information... I guess I was just looking for some confidence.”

“It’s okay, I know it must be tough. Just keep trying, okay?”

“Alright. Thanks Tomoyo.”

“Of course. See you tomorrow.”

“Bye.” Sakura looked down at her phone sadly, not wanting to silence it. She reluctantly set it down. She didn’t feel up to dealing with Syaoran right now. He was starting to drain her out. But she had no choice. Time was of the essence. She glanced at the clock. It was only six fifteen. Sakura searched out for his aura. It seemed pretty close. He may have gotten home.

Sakura walked to the door and slipped out into the hallway. She could still hear Rana’s movie going. She was afraid of what she might walk in on. She continued down the hall carefully. Syaoran’s door was in the same position it had been in since she had last passed. She glanced in hopefully. It was empty. She got to the railing and peered over cautiously. No one was in the kitchen. She looked over to Rana. They were still making out. Sakura thanked her lucky stars they weren’t getting any more passionate. She would have felt quite violated walking in on that.

Sakura turned and began to head back to her room in defeat when she heard the front door open. She hurried back to the railing, not bothering to look inconspicuous. Syaoran knew she was following him around anyways, why hide it? Rana and her boyfriend were magically sitting up straight, watching the movie once more. Syaoran entered, looking like he had been to hell and back. He walked to the kitchen counter in his depression and sat down in a chair, still aloof to Sakura’s watching eyes.

Sakura hurried down the stairs, slowing once she reached the floor. She walked over to the counter and stood a few feet from him, not wanting to come across as completely desperate.

“Are you alright?” She asked, observing his sluggish behavior.

“Yeah...” Syaoran said, leaning his head in his hands and rubbing his eyes before sitting up straight and attempting to appear alert. He could tell Sakura was still wondering. “I was just talking with the Elders, that’s all.”

Sakura nodded slowly. “Oh. Another mission?”

Syaoran glanced at her, then looked back to the fridge in front of him. “Um... I suppose you could call it that.”

“Oh...” Sakura said, feeling herself start to faulter. If he was assigned to another mission, there was no way he was going to help her. She tried not to let it get in the way. “Do you want something to drink?” She asked, trying to score a few more points.

Syaoran looked up out of a daze, blinking as if it was a completely foreign idea. “Um... sure.”

Sakura walked to the fridge with purpose and looked around. “What do you want?”

Syaoran leaned to the left to see around her at the selection of drinks. “Lemonade.”

Sakura smiled and poured out two glasses of it. She walked over and handed it across the counter to him, then stood leaning against the counter. She took a long drink and glanced over at Rana. They were still in their best behavior.

“I’m glad you came home, I don’t think they knew anyone was here earlier....”

Syaoran glanced over at Rana and some new boy she had brought home. He tried not to smile to himself. Poor Sakura had been sitting around in an extremely uncomfortable situation. They had probably been making out and doing who knows what else. He looked back to his drink, watching the yellow liquid swirl around. He could feel Sakura watching him. He could practically feel her thinking about him. He finished his drink, then stood up. He walked around to the sink and passed by Sakura, continuing to the stairs. She was already walking beside him.

“So what makes you think Eriol won’t run away this time?” Syaoran finally asked, almost to his room.

Sakura tapped her finger on her glass in boredom. “Ah.... We’ll just chase him around till he has to fight us.”

Syaoran sighed. “He’s the most powerful magician in the world, he could transport anywhere. You can’t even use transport spells yet.”

Sakura frowned, indignant. “I can too.”

Syaoran glanced at her skeptically, then stopped at his doorway. “Well it’s not a very good tactic.”

Sakura smiled weakly. “I’m totally open to suggestion.”

Syaoran sighed, then quarterturned to his doorway. “Well I’m going to do some homework now...”

Sakura shook her head. “I really do need to talk to you. I mean, I don’t have any more chances. Can you do it later?”

Syaoran sighed. She was seeming to miss the point on everything. “It’s pointless, Sakura, I already-”

“No, please, just listen to what I have to say,” Sakura pleaded, totally unaware what he had been about to tell her.

Syaoran stood silent for a moment, contemplating. He supposed it wouldn’t hurt to hear more reasons about why she needed his help. He was already gone anyways. He was completely helpless. There was no getting away from her. He turned into his room, leaving the door open for her. Sakura followed him, eyeing the bed warily. Syaoran walked to the far computer desk and pulled out the chair, then rolled it over to Sakura to sit on. She sat down gratefully, mumbling “Thanks”.

Syaoran sat down at the edge of his bed, pulling out the calculus book for security’s sake. It was always good to have something to look occupied in for the case of a conversation-gone-bad.

Sakura sat crosslegged in the chair, pushing herself around off the wall, then finally made herself pay attention. “So what did you do in that mission yesterday that made you so upset?”

Syaoran glanced up from the pages he was turning. “Upset?”

“Yes. You were upset,” She replied factually. She glared at the calculus book. Of course he couldn’t just talk.

Syaoran let out a long sigh, then dragged himself out of the book. “It was just.... disturbing, that’s all.” He went back to his book, writing in lethargy.

“Well obviously...” Sakura glared as he lazily numbered a new assignment. “Honestly, do you have to do that now?”

“Well... yeah, that mission’s going to make me miss alot of school,” Syaoran replied, not looking up from the book.

Sakura sighed. Always dumb missions. “Well fine. Be mysterious. Firstly on the agenda, I obviously was wondering if you had come to a decision.”

“Decision...?” Syaoran prompted after a few seconds of silence passed by.

“About going to England,” Sakura elaborated as if it was the most difficult thing to say in the world and he was a horrible person for forcing her to explain.

Syaoran looked up in shock. Sakura didn’t have the faintest clue the source of his shock was that he couldn’t believe she hadn’t figured out what he was talking about yet. He glanced at his book, then back to her. She was being serious. “Uh...”

“I get it, really, I do. But I mean... we can’t do it without you, Syaoran, it’s a solid fact.”

“Mhm....” Syaoran responded, looking back to his book in a new amazement of Sakura’s brain density.

Sakura let out a long sigh. “Syaoran, I leave tomorrow. I don’t know if that means anything to you but... I’m sorry, I’m not trying to guilt you into it or anything. I know I had absolutely no right barging in here like I did, especially after how when you left.... I dunno.... I mean, if I can ever explain it to you...”

Syaoran slowly dragged his eyes up from his book. He didn’t like where this was heading. He didn’t like it at all.

“...and who knows if I can because I’m already rambling now... but I mean... what I’m trying to-”

Fortunately for Syaoran, at that very moment, the front door was opened. The next series of events was truly confusing for Sakura, so they will be explained from Syaoran’s point of view.

Syaoran jumped onto his feet and lunged towards his door. He had flung it open and had his sword out faster than Sakura had realized he wasn’t in the room. He rolled across the hallway to ensure his own safety, then peered through the railings. A middle aged average Chinese business woman had rudely let herself into the house. She was holding a gun with shakey, unsure hands. She had it pointed towards Rana and her boyfriend at the moment. They cowered behind the couch.

Her eyes caught the movement upstairs and she turned swifty, her shaking hands pointed in Syaoran’s direction.

“Which one of you works for the Li Council?” She asked, her voice as shakey as the rest of her.

Syaoran glanced at Rana and her boyfriend, praying they wouldn’t do anything stupid. They continued cowering. “I do,” Syaoran answered smoothly, trying to calm down the situation.

She took a daring step into the house, her eyes glued on Syaoran in a crazy rage. “You! You bastard! You killed my husband!”

Syaoran could see her finger starting to squeeze at the trigger. He flattened himself to the floor, letting the bullet sail far, far over his head. He summoned up a shield quickly, taking a slow breath. “Your husband worked for the Chein band?” Syaoran guessed, starting to feel darkness creeping in.

“My husband was a respectable man!” She screeched, taking another step forward, gun bobbing up and down.

“I’m sure he was,” Syaoran said levelly. This was not his field. He had heard it was good to personalize with someone when they were in a craze. “What was his name?” Syaoran called.

“Kai,” The woman called, shooting another stray shot at him. It missed wildly.

“I had a friend named that once,” Syaoran remarked, carefully creeping into a better spot.

“Damn your friend,” the woman mumbled, choking back a sob.

“Do you really want to kill me?” Syaoran dared to ask.

A bullet was the only answer.

“Would your husband want to know his death turned his wife into a murderer?” Syaoran persisted, ducking out of another fire.

“I would feel better with you dead,” She shouted out, her voice becoming very high pitched.

Syaoran fiddled with his sword. He could easily send her out with an attack. But he didn’t want to. Violence wasn’t the answer here... No. He needed a more psychological approach. “I never wanted to kill anyone,” Syaoran continued. “In fact, part of me wants you to shoot me. Part of me knows I deserve it.” Syaoran chewed at the inside of his lip. He would be chancing it. He stood up, shield down, in her full view.

Her eyes widened, tears pouring out of them. “You- you’re a child!”

Syaoran fiddled with the metal of his sword uncomfortably.

“We have a boy about your age...” The woman said softly, body shaking in sobs.

Syaoran cringed. How would he ever live this down now? “I’m sorry,” He said quietly, meaning it earnestly from every part of him.

The woman shook her head, glaring. “How could you... are you mad? Have your Elders made you so insensitive to life?”

Syaoran looked at the floor, then looked back down the stairs at her. “I’m afraid I must be. I don’t have a sane explanation for you.”

She waved her gun at him, speechless and searching for words. “B...but...”

Syaoran walked himself to the top of the stairs and sat down, watching her calmly. Guilt was overwhelming him. He hated himself. He didn’t deserve to live one more minute. “I completely understand if you want to shoot me. I deserve it.”

The woman sobbed again, wiping her tears carelessly with the back of her hand. “How could they do it to such a young boy...” She trailed off, crying.

“It wasn’t them. I had a choice. I don’t have to let them make my decisions for me.”

The woman shook her head. “No. No, you wouldn’t....”

Syaoran let out a long sigh. “I wish I didn’t. I’ll never be able to say how much.”

The woman stood quietly for a while, her sobs echoing through the silent house. Rana and her boyfriend had moved their cowering to a safe position behind the couch. Syaoran dared not put any thought to Sakura. He hated himself enough without her adding to the fact.

“I’m very sorry. I know it doesn’t help anything but...” Syaoran looked for something else to say. Nothing was coming to him. “How did he die?” He dared asking. He had to know for sure.

“Stabbed in the heart, of course,” She shouted, then subsided back into a crying fit. Syaoran frowned.

Stabbed.... He felt himself slowly becoming lighter. He hadn’t stabbed anyone. He had let out a what-could-have-been fatal shot, but had never actually seen anything come of it. He let out a long breath, wondering if he should let out the new information. He eyed the woman. He figured she would insist on finding out who his accomplices were. Maybe it would be better to leave it a mystery.

“Your husband died an honorable death. You should be proud of him. You and your son.”

The woman sniffed loudly. Her gun was safely at her side. She wasn’t going to kill anyone. She looked up to him, her eyes red and puffy. “Will you go on to kill other husbands?” She asked in a weak, pathetic voice.

“No,” Syaoran said firmly. “I’m not meant to take life.”

She sniffed loudly again. She turned slowly, stood for a moment in hesitance, then stumbled towards the door. She disappeared outside, continuing down the sidewalk in an almost drunken stupor. Syaoran watched her until she was completely out of view. He stared out the open door for a while, until Rana errupted in shouting and her boyfriend, understandably, had sudden urgent business at home and had to rush out.

Syaoran blocked out Rana’s scolding’s and turned towards his room. Sakura must have heard it all. He looked over to where a bullet had gone through the wall. The hole was small. It wouldn’t be hard to fix. He took a heavy breath and returned his sword, then continued into his room. He didn’t make any eye contact with Sakura. He just walked to his bed and collapsed. He stayed collapsed for a good five minutes of silence.

He would have stayed collapsed in silence for another ten minutes or so except that Sakura had taken the initiative to climb onto the bed, crawl over to where he was, and wrap him in a hug. He was impervious to this hug for a good minute, just laying there staring at the ceiling and pretending she wasn’t there. After the good minute was over, he returned it, shutting his eyes tightly and holding her just as tight.

Syaoran took a deep breath of her flower scented hair and felt disconnected from himself. Everything was just a jumbled mess. He ignored it. He didn’t care. He felt a security and belonging he hadn’t felt in years. He held it for all it was worth. “I didn’t kill him,” Syaoran finally said quietly, loosening his grip on Sakura.

Sakura sniffed, picking her tear stained face off his chest. “Hmm?” She managed.

“I only shot at a man. I never stabbed anyone.” Syaoran explained. He felt such freedom, opening the truth like that. He had no reason to be guilty. He was able to learn from his mistake without having to make it first. He hadn’t had to kill to learn not to kill. Syaoran let out a long breath.

“Oh...” Sakura replied, not finding any comprehensible answers. She slowly sat up, unconsciously fiddling with her hair. She wiped under her eyes, hoping they didn’t look red and pathetic. They did.

“I’m sorry you had to see that,” Syaoran mumbled, still unaware Sakura had been crying.

Sakura shook her head, looking away. She scooted to the side of the bed to dangle her legs over. “Have you killed anyone?”

“No,” Syaoran answered simply, staring at the ceiling above him. “But I thought I may have, yesterday. Now you know why I was being so miserable.”

Sakura nodded, a sad smile on her face. “I guess that’s fate’s way of telling you to quit being so mysterious with me.”

Syaoran didn’t respond.

Sakura let out a long sigh. She didn’t know exactly what to make of what just happened. She had been a little disturbed by the woman shooting at Syaoran, for one. She had also found it a little strange to consider the possiblity Syaoran may have killed and been okay with it. And she couldn’t figure out why she had thought it was a good thing to do to hug him, nor why she had cried. She supposed to overload of unanswered questions had caused a reaction in her tear ducts. She watched Syaoran. He hadn’t looked at her yet. It had felt wonderful, being in his arms, if only for a few minutes. It had been a feeling she had missed more than anything. She let out a long sigh.

“Syaoran, what I was trying to tell you was that I’m sorry. I am so sorry. I hated myself every day for what I did to you in Japan. And now that I’m here with you, I hate myself even more for it. I can’t ever make it up to you, I know, but I promise, I’ll never, ever do that again.”

Syaoran stared at the ceiling harder than before. He felt his jaw stiffening. She wasn’t supposed to finish that, not after all of the stress of before.... He let out a long breath, then sat up, watching the door to the hallway blankly. He didn’t feel like answering her. He shouldn’t have to. But he would. He had to stop doing this to himself. He was killing himself, letting it go on. “That’s all past, Sakura,” He answered quietly. “What’s done is done. Apologizing isn’t going to change how we’ve grown away from it. I’ve changed and there’s nothing you can do to fix that. It’s how it is.”

Sakura felt her tear ducts trying to react to something or another. She didn’t bother to restrain them, since they had already been going freely and the initial embarassment was over with. She didn’t really know how to respond to him. She couldn’t really blame him for saying that. He was struggling to avoid her and live on as an independent, functioning human being. She couldn’t just assume he felt anything for her anymore. That may just be wishful thinking. And in this case, it appeared to be so. She stood up, her left knee cracking. She glared at the knee for doing something so rude, then decided to disappear to her room. She glanced back at Syaoran. “You aren’t going, then?” She asked, managing to keep her voice on one monotonous level.

Syaoran looked up at her. He could see the stains down her cheeks from tears. He was slightly surprised. He hadn’t realized she was crying. He wondered breifly what had brought it on. He supposed it was probably the realization that she would never really have his love again. He didn’t realize she had been crying long before, selflessly for him. It was a pity this miscomunnication wasn’t cleared up.

Sakura waited for a response, but got none. Just as well... She turned and headed to the hallway. She glanced towards the downstairs. Rana was fixing the dishevelled peices of furniture. Sakura turned back to Syaoran. “Good night then.”

“Goodnight,” Syaoran responded, standing up from his bed.

Sakura walked down the hall quietly, feeling completely dejected. Syaoran shut his door and proceeded to look for a suitcase.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ahh Stressante, non?? I’m still in Canada right now! How’s that, eh! I wrote that chapter in like two boring days of nothingness. I’ve just been hanging out with the Acadians up here, practicing my francais. Quite exciting, except that I can’t post these chapters nor have them editted by my trusty edittor person.... and I was pondering and realized I can’t save these chapters to HTML on my laptop so... omg! I may have just come up with a genius plan involving my dad’s laptop, aunt’s computer, and a lot of floppy disks. I’m a genius! Hopefully it will work. If it did, this chapter is up sooner rather than later, and was posted from Boston rather than Indianapolis. Anywho, author’s note is supposed to be about the story, n’est pas? Sorry, sorry.... I get to rambling about myself.... cause see, there’s no one here for me to talk to except for my dad and the gma, so it’s like.... AHH! I am thrilled when we go to the superstore and I get to say things like ‘excusez-moi’ and ‘avez-vous un pizza’. It’s terrible.

But the story... yes yes... So whoever told me I wouldn’t be able to pull this last half off in five chapters was right on the money. I was utterly convinced I could do it. But alas.... my longing to keep my story going is kicking in.... Maybe it’ll be more like ten chapters. But really, it’s almost there! I mean, one little trip and it’s finished. AHH! What’s with Syaoran and Sakura, you ask? What’s going on, is he going to help her, is he not? I’ll leave that suitcase line as the clue. I love these kids, they lead such exciting lives. That beach expedition of theirs.... I like took my trip to the beach with my gma and dad and magnified it by 1000 and there you have it....

Anyways! Really long author’s note, eh? I’m telling you, no one to talk to. I’m dying to check my email. AHHHH....... It is one fifteen in the morning and I have to awake at seven to drive TEN FREAKING HOURS with my dad to Boston. omg it’s awful it’s so boring. You like get on this one highway in Maine and drive for hours and hours and never see another car. It’s like this deserted four lane highway lined with pine trees. I set on the cruise control and just barely pay enough attention to steer while listening to my favorite musical artists (me, my band!) and ...............AHH I’m writing way too much. Sorry! Must go to sleep. Hope these chapters are adequately exciting, having all the good aspects to them that chapters should have.

Email comments to the author with the ridiculously long author’s note at

[email protected] or on aol/yahoo SyaoranChic

Your completely obsessed, going insane, totally going into one of those slap happy half asleep moods author-

-Syaoran Fan 4 Life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!