Ashes Fade Away

*(7/?)

By Sakata Ri Houjun

********************

Miaka didn't know when the last time she had awakened

to such a morning.  For as long as she could remember,

a servant had always interrupted her dreams to assist

in bathing and dressing her.  Following that would be

the same, tiring normalcy.  The lessons she'd been

taught were to refine and prepare her for the

eventuality of becoming a queen.

It was the life she was born into and appreciated the

privileges that had been afforded her.  But she still

hated.

Growing up, her only friend had been Nuriko, a child

born into nobility who was chosen to be the princess's

companion and confidant. The two had shared deep

secrets and even got into trouble on several

occasions.  Even though Nuriko was older and quite

different, Miaka still looked to her violet-haired

friend as the big sister she never had. 

Other than Nuriko and her elder brother, Keisuke, the

only other children Miaka had been allowed to

associate with were those of visiting dignitaries and

the noblemen of Sakaeru.  Miaka remembered fondly of

one girl with blonde hair and blue eyes who seemed shy

and lonely.  Miaka had taken this girl and dragged her

off to experience one adventure after another in the

castle.

She had been sad to see Lady Yui return to her home. 

Last she heard, Lady Yui had married a young, rich

lord who was generous and kind.  But most of all, Lord

Tetsuya had married her for love.

But her fate was bound by custom and the wants of her

family.  They did want the best for her, but Miaka

didn't care about title or wealth.  She wanted what

Lady Yui had.  She wanted to be free to love.

Miaka sat up only to notice that Tamahome was already

awake, watching the community below bustle to life. 

Outside, she could hear the faint laughter of children

and the occasional shout from an adult.  This was what

normal life was about, what she wanted.

Pulling her knees to her chest, she remembered of how

she and Tamahome had talked during the night.  Well,

she did most of the talking, but he listened.  His

cool warrior's veneer was slowly discarded along with

his armor and he even laughed a little when she

recounted what had happened when her brother had let

her hold his sword.  Keisuke still carried the scar on

his leg.

For several moments last night, she felt so removed

from the life she had known, forgetting entirely her

duty and etiquette.  She eventually grew exhausted and

fell asleep, but she didn't know if the knight had

done the same.  He seemed incredibly paranoid, but

there was sweetness beneath it all.  So much like her

brother...

"Good morning, Tamahome."

He started suddenly, not aware that the princess was

awake yet.  He had been so absorbed in his own

thoughts that he had allowed his guard to slip.

"Good morning, Your Highness," he returned.

"Did you get any sleep at all?"  Miaka stood and

wandered over to where Tamahome sat.  She peered at

his somewhat haggard and sad face.

"I am trained to get by on minimal sleep.  No need to

concern yourself."  He was watching a group of small

children playing with the carefree abandonment that

all children have.  Their laughter floated up to his

ears.  It was what had awakened him, torturing his

mind with memories he'd all but forgotten.

Miaka noticed the sullen tone and her curiosity and

concern urged her to press.  "I can’t help it.  You

want to talk?"

"No," he answered, hoping his tone would convey to her

to drop the subject.  If she noticed, she had chosen

to ignore.

She knelt down beside the pensive knight and allowed

her eyes to wander to where his gray ones were gazing

at.  She saw the source of the sounds she had heard

earlier and smiled.  "Do you miss you family?"

"What family?" he snapped, turning his head away from

her questing gaze.  "It's none of your business

anyways..."

"Tamahome," she murmured, placing a hand on his

shoulder.  He was obviously hurting.  Perhaps she

couldn't help but she couldn't sit idly by.

He sighed and shrugged her hand off.  "I'm sorry.  I

forgot my place for a moment, Your Highness." 

Tamahome stood, slipping back into his role of a

knight as he retrieved his armor.  He knew the

princess was only trying to help, but he was beyond

her compassion.

And his problems were not meant to be hers.  What

happened to him would never matter to such a woman as

she.  The princess was above and beyond him even

though she stood but a couple of feet behind him with

wide hazel eyes.  He could feel the honest concern in

that gaze, and her innocence too.

Just like Yuiren, he thought bitterly.  Listening to

her talk last night in that wonderfully musical voice

had reminded him all too painfully of his youngest

sister.  This, more than anything, was why he had to

push aside any attachment he might feel to Miaka.

Miaka watched his stiff, measured movements and heard

the curt way he had used her title.  It was as if all

her hard work to earn this man as a friend, not just

merely a protector, was naught.  Even though they must

return to their stations in life, she refused to give

up so easily on the bond she had worked so hard to

establish.

"It's okay, Tamahome."  The gentleness of her voice

stilled his movements and he glanced up at her caring

eyes.

"Perhaps I don't, and maybe never will, understand

what it is that drives you to your action.  If you

carry pain or sorrow, I can't promise that I can take

it away, but I think I can help to ease it some."  She

closed the distance between them and he faced her

fully, his face still impassive.

"I'm far from everyone and everything I have ever

known.  I'm heading towards a future that is

frightening and I feel overwhelmed and alone.  I don't

know how you feel, but I can understand the isolation.

 I'm not going to pry, but if you ever want to

talk..," she trailed off with a wave of her delicate

hands.

Tamahome stared at her, his face unreadable but his

mind racing.  For the past few years, he had lived

only for the next command, obeying dutifully as a

knight should and denying his own emotions even

existed anymore.  He was certain that his heart had

died the day he held the corpse of Yuiren in his arms,

the day he had buried his whole family.  And

yet...yet...

He met Miaka's hazel eyes and found himself drowning in

her compassion, swimming in twin pools of utter

innocence.  Without fully realizing what he was doing,

he pulled the princess against him and lowered his

mouth to hers.

She had never expected this.  It frightened and

thrilled her all at once.  To feel his warm, muscled

body wrapped around her, to feel his lips slowly

parting her own, to smell him both heady and musky... 

He was strong and gentle and she felt her body

beginning to respond with eagerness to the kiss,

wanting more.

But Tamahome pulled away and cradled Miaka's face in

his hands.  His eyes had softened and seemed so sad. 

She placed her hands over his and smiled.  "Tamahome,"

she whispered, daring to hope that what she was

feeling was what she had been wishing for.

"Miaka," he responded, not knowing what to do or say. 

"What have you done to me?"

A look of utter confusion crossed her face as he drew

away from her closeness and returned to strapping his

armor back on.

"Tamahome?" she ventured.  She didn't understand what

had just happened, as if it were just a dream.  But

the sensations it caused bewildered her even more. 

And now his abrupt change left her feeling strangely

hurt.

"I'm certain you must be worried about His Highness,

Hotohori," he stated flatly, his eyes refusing to look

at her.  "And you must be famished as well, Your

Highness."

He opened the door in the floor and let the ladder

fall.  After a moment, he held his hand out and looked

at her.  His eyes had gone to the dull flatness she

remembered seeing yesterday when she first met the

knight.  Miaka sighed and glanced around the small

room one last time.

She took Tamahome's offered hand and he drew her

towards the opening and the ladder below with the

respect a subordinate affords his betters.  Miaka

felt like crying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sleep well, Your Highness?"

Miaka turned startled eyes to see Tasuki and Kouji

sitting nearby, leaning back up against the trunk of

the tree.  It had been the red-head who had spoke and

he then winked at her expression as he placed his

hands behind his head.  Kouji took the opportunity to

elbow his companion in the exposed ribs.

"Don't mind the smartass, Your Highness."

Miaka smiled as she planted her feet on solid ground.

 "It's no bother."  She could hear Tamahome's descent

and all three glanced up at his arrival.

"He looks a little tired too," Tasuki leered.  Kouji

punched him in the shoulder but he continued to grin

at the blue-haired knight.  Kouji sighed.

"He's an idiot who don't know when to shut up."

Tasuki stuck out his tongue at Kouji as he stood.

"We did sleep well enough, Kouji.  Thank you."

"Yeah well," he muttered while standing up as well. 

"I see ya found my private collection."  He motioned

to the dress Miaka wore with one hand.

"This is yours?" she asked with wide eyes.

Tasuki burst into a fit of muffled giggles as Kouji

blushed.  Behind her, Tamahome merely raised an

eyebrow.

"No," he muttered.  "It belong to a lady friend of

mine.  Although I think it looks a lot better on you."

"I figured it wouldn't do for me to walk around like I

was a princess."

"But you are a princess, Your Highness," Tasuki

insisted.

Miaka shook her head.  "Not today.  I'm merely Miaka,

a normal person who wishes to see her companion."

"His Highness?" Tasuki asked to which Miaka nodded in

confirmation.

The two brigands looked at one another and Tasuki

shrugged.  Kouji closed his eyes and shook his head. 

"Lady, you sure are different from so many other

aristocrats and dignitaries we've run across."

Miaka's hazel eyes sparkled as she grinned.  "But I

bet they didn't come from Sakaeru either."

Tasuki tossed his head over his shoulder.  "It's this

way.  I ran into Mits this morning and he said that

His Highness should be up and around in a few days."

"What will happen in the meantime?" Miaka asked

softly.

"Yer welcome to stay till he's able to leave or we can

guide you safely to the castle," Kouji offered with a

shrug.

Miaka glanced back to Tamahome who only continued to

stare past her as if she weren't there.  Feeling a

pang of regret and sorrow she turned back to the pair

who stood before her.  Despite the knight's attitude

towards her, she smiled.

"If it's okay, I'd like to stay here. I feel it was my

fault that His Highness was injured since he ventured

out of the palace to escort me in the first place.  It

wouldn't be right to simply abandon him."

Again the two exchanged a look.  Apparently they

weren't used to such a strong woman and royalty to

boot.  They were impressed by her character and the

way she had reacted, taking everything into stride. 

One thing was for certain, things were going to be

getting interesting from here on out.

********************

Next Chapter:  Bedside manners.