Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip, that started from this Nippon port aboard this tiny ship. The mate was a mighty sword-slinger, the skipper tall and pale, five passengers set out that day on a three-hour sail, a three-hour sail. The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed, if not for the courage of the fearless crew, the Noonza would be lost, the Noonza would be lost. They hit the ground on the shore of this uncharted desert isle, with Gourrigan, the Red Priest too, the chimera man and his leech, the sorceress, the Trickster and Firia...here on Gourrigan's Isle!

A short time ago, on an island no-one can find unless they're a guest author...

Hoowee (watching the words of a new GI fic scroll up her spy 'o view monitor): Weirdo, God of Insanity... HOW DARE YOU SO BLATANTLY USE THE SAME ENDING TO YOUR FIC AS ME AND THEN THREATEN TO NAME THE SEQUEL SO SIMILAR!! (Breathes heavily) YOU ARE SOOOOO DEAD!! (Calming down) Right then, what else have people written. (brings up a couple of fics by Anjin) WHAT!!

Hoowee rampages through her conveniently hidden headquarters, throwing comfy green chairs everywhere. In the room next door, Sailor Bob hears all the racket and pokes her head around the corner of the cave just in time to get smacked in the face with one of the flying green chairs.

Sound Effect: WHAM!!

Sailor Bob: OROOOO!!

Hoowee: Oh! My poor minion-for-the-duration-of-the-fic! (rushes over to Bob's side and helps the magical girl up) I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there.

Hoowee props Sailor bob up against the door frame and then systematically pops every single tweeting bird flying around the girls head.

Sailor Bob (rubbing head in pain): What's going on Hoowee? There hasn't been another guest writer roast has there?

Hoowee shakes her head emphatically and then points to her view monitor.

Hoowee: I've just been catching up on the events of Gourrigan's Isle and both Weirdo and Anjin are going to die... slowly.

Sailor Bob (blinking): Umm... may I enquire as to why?

Hoowee: Weirdo has become even eviler the Michael the Red Priest in copydom... He's first on the hit list. While Anjin...

Hoowee pauses for a moment as a spotlight highlights her and behind her two flags, one a boxing kangaroo the other the Australian flag cross over each other like swords. Somehow, Sailor Bob's magical girl theme music has changed into the Australian national anthem and is playing in the background.

Hoowee: One can only pray that he's actually Australian or he has no right to take the micky out of us so much with that 'Ben' character of his.

Sailor Bob: Then it's time for revenge?

Hoowee: Yes Bob, it's time for revenge.

The Australian paraphernalia in the background disappears and the National Anthem is booted... something that the government has wanted to do for years.

Hoowee: But first a challenge must be issued, it only pays to be polite you know. ^.~v

A massive sweatdrop appears on Sailor Bob's head.

Sailor Bob (muttering to herself): And just what are the Slayers and Oni gonna think about this?

Hoowee (goes all sparkly eyed): OH!! I get to see Oni-sama again! Yay!

Hoowee starts skipping around in a circle at the thought of seeing her handsome trenchcoated demon again.

Sailor Bob: sigh.

***

Somewhere on the other side of the island in his new office, Oni sneezes.

***

NOTE: This fic stops while Hoowee E-mails both Anjin and Weirdo to issue her challenge. The actual fic will recommence when she finds out what these two guest writers of evilness have to say for themselves. If they cannot convince her of their innocence then she will not hesitate to beat them both sensless in the rest of the fic.

***

A short note from Hoowee... 'Kay, this is not really long and there're no Slayers cast in it (yet) but trust me, the next part is gonna answer allllll yer questions. (suddenly remembers Diagonal Crotch Girl is still running around) Oops, Oh yeah. Have to do something about that too. -