I was going to put 'Thought of the Day', but then thought I couldn't possibly keep up with changing it everyday. So then I thought 'Week', but then didn't want two "Weekly" things. So there, ya happy?
Geez, you make me go through the whole deal of explaining it...
For crying out loud, you might has well just tie me up with seaweed and throw me to the marsupials...
HEY!!! Look, it's a poll, just for YOU!
Last updated: 6-7-99
June 7th:
What's up with the saying, "happy as a clam"? I mean, how happy can a clam really be??? It's all alone in it's shell, it gets eaten by humans, it's not good enough to make pearls (like its rival, the oyster), and it can't read! What's so great about having the happiness of a clam?
May 25th:
Why is it that you go from store to store, shopping for over five hours, looking for a dress, and end up buying the dress you liked at the very FIRST store you went to???
March 15th:
Is there another word for 'synonym'?
March 4th:
If a man with multiple personalities is threatening suicide, is it considered a hostage situation?
March 3rd:
The state of California was started by Napoleon! And we all know what kind of man HE was. And we all know what San Francisco and Los Angeles are like. That explains a lot.
March 1st:
French people are odd. They name both a pudding and a hair styling product 'MOUSSE'. If one was a bit daft, one could mistakingly eat the styling product and put the pudding their hair! Then we'd have a bunch of sick, stupid people with chocolate pudding in their hair. The French should have better foresight and be more considerate of those who are daft! Shame on you Frogs!
February 27th:
Gelatin has a weird consistency.
February 15th:
Why isn't there a Chia Bob Saget? They've got a Chia pet, Chia Professor, Chia Herb Garden, Chia Cat, but no Chia Bob Saget!
February 9th:
"If only I had a little humility...THEN I'd be perfect." *sigh*
January 29th, 1999:
He who laughs last...
...just got the joke and now has everybody in the room looking at him.
January 8th, 1999:
Let's say your boyfriend gives you a champagne bottle for Christmas, and he says, "How about a little bit of the bubbly?" with a twinkle in his eye. If the bottle is bubble bath, show your obvious disgust at his vulgarity and throw him out, and take a bath anyway. If it's actual champagne, show your obvious disgust at his acoholic hunger, throw him out, and drink the champagne anyway.
December 10th, 1998:
Someone once told me that I was a procrastinator, but I didn't know what he meant. I was going to look it up in the dictionary, but I never got around to it.
December 3rd, 1998:
"Birthdays make me think of candles on a cake. And you know those annoying candles that keep lighting even after you've turned blue in the face from blowing them out? Well...that's like my personality."
